Katie Price Seduces Peter Andre With Sex Photos And Introduces New Lover

PSSST! Wanna buy some Katie Price sex pictures? Wanna see I’m A Celebrity bugbear Jordan getting them out and getting it one without having to trawl the web? Come closer. The Daily Star is advertising the sale of such images on its front page:

JORDAN SEX PICS FOR SALE

Yeah, sorry. Only pictures. If you want some moving porn you need to respond to a coupon on in the Star’s classifieds’ section or tune into its sister organ, Channel X. As for these sex pics:

KATIE Price is desperate to stop Alex Reid going public with sexplosive photos that could ruin her career.

Sex pictures will ruin the career of topless stunna Katie Price? How?

Katie Price, 31, is also terrified the raunchy pictures could ruin her attempts to win back ex-husband Peter Andre, 36.

That would be the Peter Andre who married the topless stunna, having wooed her with his pop acorn in the jungle, married her in a tits and taffeta explosion and then embarked on a televised career of dry humping, crotch grabbing and sex chat?

Kate fears dumped cage-fighter Alex, 34, could use her most intimate ever pictures to get revenge. And she has ordered aides to step in before he can humiliate her by selling the snaps or posting them online.

So Katie is going to sell the shocking images to prevent Alex Reid from selling the shocking images. It is the only way she can be saved. Desperate times call for desperate measures. Perhaps in selling the images she can seduce Peter Andre?

A source said: “If sleazy photos of Kate came out it would destroy everything she’s trying to do. She has come out of the jungle aiming to reinvent herself as a serious businesswoman and model mum.”

Hence the name change to Kate Price, woman of substances as opposed to Katie Price, woman of substances hand-stitched and stuffed beneath an orange coating. Kate had best not upset Alex any more lest those steamy pictures appear before our eyes, perhaps in the Star. In other news:

SEX-mad Kate Price has twisted the knife into dumped lover Alex Reid by vowing to bed his cage fighting rival…She boasted that she plans to bed fighter Tom “Kong” Watson, 27, before his May clash with cross-dressing Alex.

Good of Katie to advertises her ex-lovers fight. It’s the Katie factor:

Ratings for I’m A Celebrity have plunged by more than 20 per cent after Katie Price quit the show.

What show’s that, then?

The Katie Price Burning: A Life In Pictures

Anorak

Posted: 26th, November 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink