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Anorak | OK! Does The Porn Mag Bundle: Coleen Rooney’s Christmas Shopping Party At Cricket

OK! Does The Porn Mag Bundle: Coleen Rooney’s Christmas Shopping Party At Cricket

by | 8th, December 2009

ok-pornIN OK! celebrity porn – Coleen Rooney talks babies and fat; Alex Curran licks her plate; diamond-encrusted nails do nappies and Cricket boutique celebrates Christmas shopping…

THIS week’s OK! magazine comes in a pack of four. There are “FOUR GREAT MAGS FOR ONLY £2.95”. The effect is like those bundled porn magazines on the top shelf at the newsagent’s, whereby porn publishers stuff a load of old, recycled filth in a cellophane wrapper and advertise loadsa mags for a fiver.

Incidentally, Richard Desmond, owner of OK! magazine, also broadcasts porn on the telly and the web. How long before he slips OK! into a back copy of his former OK! stable mate Asian Babes or the Red Hot TV guide to stave off buyers’ embarrassment?

In this week’s OK!, you can see Coleen Rooney and Alex Curran on the cover and learn “HOW I LOST TWO STONE IN FOUR WEEKS”!.

Which of them is talking is not made clear. But in a photoshoot with the added spice of WAG Sheree Murphy, we might get to find out.

It’s Cricket’s Christmas party. Cricket is a boutique in Liverpool. It might very well be the only boutique in Liverpool. It sells the kind of clothes WAGs wear. And at the do we find Coleen Rooney, and learn that she is the one who has lost the weight.

“Kai is a great baby, no trouble at all”, says Coleen sipping a glass of champagne. She says Kai “doesn’t look like either” she or Wayne Rooney, her footballer. The chatter swiftly turns to weighty matters. Colleen tells us that the weight dropped off because, she guesses, being a “hands-on mum” and running about burns the calories.

Then Robbie Keane’s wife Claudine arrives. She has a young baby, too. Claudine has “super-long diamond–encrusted nails”. She says her baby is “no problem at all”. She says that what with the nails “somehow I manage”. Where there’s a will, there’s a way.

Other arrivals are Chloe Murray, WAG to footballer “Matt” and a couple of orangey-brown blondes who aren’t WAGS so must be actresses in Hollyoaks.

Then everyone sits down for roast turkey with all the trimmings. And Alex Curran, Steven Gerrard’s WAG, “literally liked” her plate clean.

And every one had a terrific time at the shop’s party. Shop now and shop often…



Posted: 8th, December 2009 | In: Key Posts, OK! Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink