Anorak | Myleene Klass In Knife Horror: Celebrity Gardens A Goer

Myleene Klass In Knife Horror: Celebrity Gardens A Goer

by | 9th, January 2010

myleene-klass-feetMYLEENE Klass is stood at a window waving a knife. Is this a teaser for 10 Years Younger, the beauty and scalpel show presented by the ubiquitous Klass?

Who wants some? Who wants a new face?

The Sun says Klasss is using the knife to “scare off yobs skulking in her garden at night”.

You can tell that the Sun likes Klass because while the people in her garden are “skulking yobs”, Klass is a “mum”.

The mum of one was alone in her kitchen as toddler Ava, two, slept upstairs when she saw the trespassers trying to break into her garden shed and peering through her windows.

Call the BBC, quick. Klass has a garden shed. Get her to front a new gardening show pronto. And is Celebrity Sheds a goer?

Meanwhile, the Sun goes on, setting the scene:

Desperate to protect her daughter and her home, brave Myleene, 31 – whose fiance Graham Quinn was away on business – grabbed a kitchen knife and waved it, shouting: “I’m calling the police.”

(Note to self: Is Myleene available to front Get Off My Lawn, a new green vermin show? Contact agent)

So Myleene is under threat. She bravely waves a knife. She calls the Celebrity Police Force. And…

But when cops arrived they told her she could have got into trouble with the law – even though she was in her own HOME and the yobs were outside.


An “insider” tells us how scared Myleene was. It’s the talk of the prison population.

Her tactics worked and the yobs ran off. But the Marks & Spencer model was horrified when cops told her carrying an “offensive weapon” is illegal – even in her own home.

Thanks to the “insider” this is big news.

She just happened to be in the kitchen when she saw them – if she’d been in another room she would probably have grabbed something else.”

Like a Marks & Spencer dressing gown (£22.99 in pink, blue and lavender). Instead she went for the bread knife (£12:99).

“It defies belief that this is the police stance on protecting your property.”

Whatever. This story is huge. HUGE. And in case you think it’s just a case of Myleene’s people using a small incident to push their client and the Sun being so desperate for news that it publishes the thing as its lead story on its website, know that everyone could have died in rivers of blood and guts:

Last month businessman Munir Hussain was jailed for 30 months for grievous bodily harm after attacking a burglar who tied up and threatened to kill him and his family.

He’s not available for Celebrity Instant Justice, so the job’s Myleene’s, if she wants it…


Posted: 9th, January 2010 | In: Celebrities Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink