The Death Of Susan Boyle Gives SuBo A YouTube Sequel
SUSAN Boyle Watch: Anorak’s at-a-glance look at Susan Boyle in the news:Laydeeees and gentlemen, presenting the Death of Susan Boyle, featuing Elaine Paige, John Lennon and an intruder. Will it be captured in YouTube and give SuBo a hit sequel?
It’s not pleasant but murder rarely is. Susan Bole will be stabbed in the neck, have her head removed by pliers and shagged in any holes left. It’s not pleasant, ladies and gentlemen, but murder rarely is.
As minds whirl with how Susan Boyle will be slain, her brother, John Boyle tells us that we must not get carried away. Hold the drill and the chainsaw. Susan Boyle will be shot six times as she enters her home. She will stagger a few steps into the vestibule, or hallway, before collapsing in a river of blood. No, no skewers. Says the Sun:
THE worried brother of raid victim Susan Boyle told last night how he fears a crazed fan will kill her – just like John Lennon.
Says John Boyle, in light of an intruder being found in SuBo’s home:
“I am very upset about the lack of security. Her management company are too busy counting the money Susan has made them to consider her safety. The family have told them several times that vast improvements need to be made to avoid something like this happening. This it the second time something has happened to Susan at her home and it is extremely worrying. Susan is a massive world star and needs better protection. You look at what happened to John Lennon in New York – it’s really worrying.”
Says SuBo:
“I think he got more of a scare than I did because he ran off.”
Over in the Daily Record, we get to relive the post-horror horror:
FRIGHTENED Susan Boyle believes the prowler she found in her council house has tried to break in before. The singing sensation was “terrified and hysterical” on Tuesday night after she came home to find an intruder in her humble semi-detached.
A pal says Boyle was sick “nine times” after the incident.
Stand well back – SuBo might be catching. Elaine Paige – spinster; musical star; known to millions as ElPa – says Boyle is a “virus who had spread across the world in a nanosecond”.
And who can be wiped out in a trice. Susan Boyle, ladies and genbltmsn, a woman who became a star, was billed as evidence of God’s love and now is the subject of death threats and likened to a disease…
Posted: 28th, January 2010 | In: Key Posts, Susan Boyle Comments (8) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink
January 28th, 2010 at 11:58 pm
June, oh dear you mean she is living in a home that was built for the ‘needy’? Yes, she certainly should have moved out a few million dollars back. They are all so proud of her there, I wonder how they would react about their dear Susan moving.
January 28th, 2010 at 10:45 pm
Elaine Page was just being honest & speaking her mind….it is the mail who are making it sound like she said that Lady Sue is a bit like swine flu…..
Typical media scaremongering again…
As for security….like i said.. buy a burglar alarm and security locks for SuBo and she will be safe at home…unless of course SuBo would prefer a big burly bouncer as a bodyguard…PiMo might be up for the job….he’d certainly scare any SuBo stalkers shitless.
January 28th, 2010 at 10:20 pm
Cheryl
SuBo really should vacate her council house now, and let someone else have it, the waiting lists everywhere in the UK are lengthy, when someone’s income rises enough to pay a commercial rent or buy a house there could be resentment.
‘Management’ is local council, and they do pay for running repairs (although I could well be wrong there) and should say they are meant to pay for running repairs
January 28th, 2010 at 10:08 pm
Elaine Page’s words come across as if they were spoken with a tad bit of jealousy and ‘catty’.
Pebbles was most likely hiding underneath the bed, Yampster.
Her brother told the management company twice she needed vast improvements for security reasons? Sounds like she does need more security and why didn’t he have the improvements done instead of complaining they are not being done and send the management company the bill.
January 28th, 2010 at 2:35 pm
…any future SuBo stalkers should beware….SuBo is a virus….and they may get infected….
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-1246629/Susan-Boyle-virus-claims-Elaine-Paige-reveals-true-feelings-duet.html
January 28th, 2010 at 1:49 pm
I did try to warn of the danger that SuBo stalkers pose in a previous post…..maybe SuBo should spend some of her well earned money on a burglar alarm and new locks…or do a Dick Whittington….i.e. run off with her pussy,PeBo, to London….a place far safer for a superstar than West Lothian…
January 28th, 2010 at 12:52 pm
Where was Pebbles while all this was going on? This could have been an attempt at abduction but of course there’s no proof of that either, I might add
January 28th, 2010 at 11:34 am
See she was headline news last night, seemed quite perky too