Katie Price Pulls Out Of London Marathon, Saving Us From Seeing Her Hideously Sweating Everywhere
KATIE Price – or Jordan if you’re from the ’90s – has decided to do us all a massive favour by pulling out of this year’s London Marathon, saving us all from the awful image of her distorted face and voluminous breasts pumping out orange sweat onto the pavements of the nation’s capital.
It’s tempting to think that she could have actually gone ahead with the thing, allowing people to point and laugh while blurting out “LOOK! That Katie Price outfit is amazingly unrealistic! Those lips look like a burst settee. Wait. That’s not the real deal is it?”
However, we can only sneer so much because she’s – rather irritatingly – being rather nice and saying that she’ll double the value of any donations that her fans have made. Yes. Katie Price has fans.
Of course, you could see this as Price thinking that she simply can’t be arsed to actually run the race and that, by throwing money at a charity, she’ll absolve herself of any effort related guilt.
However, it would appear that she had to pull out on medical advice. Oh, and that she’s getting her brother to do her chores for her instead.
“My brother Danny, who was part of the team running the marathon with me, is now going to be doing the Boston Marathon.”
“We have obviously had a lot of generous donations made to us and we hope to keep raising more money through him.”
“I hope those that have agreed to sponsor me will agree to their donation still going to the very worthwhile charities, but anyone who does want their donation returned should contact me through my website www.katieprice.co.uk.
“I intend to double all the donations that are not returned.”
Lazy, generous trout.