Anorak

Anorak | Victoria Beckham Advised To Have Breast Implants On Her Back

Victoria Beckham Advised To Have Breast Implants On Her Back

by | 19th, August 2011

HOW sick is Victoria Beckham? The Mirror says Sticky Vicky is so sick that she can’t hold her baby. Vicky’s slipped-disc is front-page news. The evidence of Vicky’s sickness speaks for itself:

SICK: Vicky has NO tattoo of Harper on her body
SICKER: Vicky has NOT released a range of Harper Seven mum ‘n’ baby cosmetics
SICKEST: Vicky has yet to beam a photo of Harper onto the face of the Sun

Says the Mirror:

Victoria Beckham is in so much pain from a crippling back injury that she can’t even hold daughter Harper or leave the house unaided.

She can’t hold while lying down? Has she ever left the house unaided?

A source said: “Rumours Victoria has been frantically exercising and trying to lose her baby weight could not be further from the truth.”

So. She’s doing no exercise and eating sticky buns by the gross?

The cruel reality is she was suffering with a bad back throughout her ­pregnancy, and then something untoward happened during the C-section, badly aggravating it. She has had an X-ray which showed she has slipped a disc in her lower back. Victoria is in a lot of pain and even struggling to hold Harper… When she goes to breastfeed, David has to basically prop-up the baby.

“Something untoward”? We can only guess as the carrot of sensation is dangled.

The Daily Mirror’s crack team of investigators are on it. They also might like to uncover how the story that Vicky can’t hold her baby became a story that she, er, can hold her baby.

More news on Vicky’s back to follow. But if she is having trouble propping herself up, we suggest she moves her old breasts to her back and goes for comfort ahead of style…



Posted: 19th, August 2011 | In: Celebrities Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink