Tory Blog Says Muggers Are Gypsies Trying To Be Black
A MEMBER of Conservative Future, the youth wing of the the Tory Party, has been mugged by a cunning gang of gypsies at a Posh Chelsea watering hole, London Spin can reveal. The victim was attending a secret strategy dinner discussing campaign planning with another female attendee when he was approached by the gang. The fraudsters were trying to flog a fake pearl necklace and aggressively asked for the victim’s female companion to ‘try on’ the dodgy gems.
After a stern exchange, the con artists fled the scene, and five minutes later the activist discovered his £200 iPhone was missing from the table. Speaking exclusively to London Spin, he said: “They came over to our table offering the dodgy necklace, which we didn’t want to buy. They were quite pushy about it and on reflection it was clearly a cunning plan to distract our attention while they swiped my mobile. It was a very slick operation; I suspected they’d used some kind of ancient gypsy magic on me.”
The activist was so angry he alerted cops.
The post has now been taken down. Not because the voting gypsy communities may take offence – well, not only that – but we think because the item was accompanied by a photo of a white man in black make-up. No, not David Starkey – someone else…