Beyonce Names Baby Ikea
The internets looked away from 9/11 explosions and Paul McCartney’s hair to study the bump that’s seemed to fold in half. Theories abounded:
It’s twins who don’t get along!
It’s a fake bump designed to defelct eyes from the real child growing inside Jay Z’s other woman. When that child is born, and the mother paid off, Beyonce will reach up her skirts and pull out the kid and present it as her own!
The dress has caught up a little!
The padded tum-tum makes her look more pregnant than the really is!
Her breasts have sagged!
She’s sponsored by Ikea!
Beyonce hears the chatter and tells ABC that the rumours are “stupid, ridiculous and false”.
But which ones?