Chantelle Houghton Is Pregnant By Alex Reid – But Does She Know How?
CHANTELLE Houghton is…11 weeks pregnant. To prove it Chantelle holds up a pregnancy test kit, allowing OK! readers to see that it has turned bright orange, indicating that either she has mated with an Oompah Loompah or else estranged Mr Katie Price Alex Reid is the daddy.
This is “amazing news“. This is her “miracle baby”, who will show those glow-in the dark-cats that the future is bright and children can come with night lights built in, thus saving mum and dad a few bob.
As Chantelle cradles her tummy, as all celebs mums must, she tells us that she will be “milking it”. Someone needs to have a word with the ambulatory Katie Price off-cut. You don’t milk them, they milk you. Mums do not suckle on the child’s teet unless they are a Kardashian.
OK!: “Have the doctors explained what has happened to you?”
If not, Chantelle, there are books…