Fifa orders Brazil to sell watery beer at World Cup
FIFA, eh? Watching over us all with ever-loving grace. Fighting the good fight. Tackling the real issues that threaten to undermine our beloved game with feverish haste and ruthless efficiency. Racism? Dealt with. Corruption? Ditto. Homophobia? Eradicated. Gifting World Cup hosting rights to very rich countries with ‘questionable’ human rights records? Not an issue.
Now some sages in Brazil have made it illegal for beer to be sold in football stadiums and those very same bozos are pleading that the law be kept in place for the 2014 World Cup due to concerns over safety.
Thankfully FIFA general secretary Jerome Valcke has, metaphorically of course, kicked them square in the nuts:
“Alcoholic drinks are part of the World Cup, so we’re going to have them. Excuse me if I sound a bit arrogant but that’s something we won’t negotiate. The fact that we have the right to sell beer has to be a part of the law.”
Hear that? It’s non-negotiable punks!
FIFA’s official partners for the 2014 World Cup? Sony, Visa, Coca-Cola, Adidas, Hyundai and…Budweiser.