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Anorak | It’s not too late to send the Olympics to Paris is it? The four ceremony rip-off

It’s not too late to send the Olympics to Paris is it? The four ceremony rip-off

by | 24th, February 2012

PA 12861101 Its not too late to send the Olympics to Paris is it? The four ceremony rip off

IS it too late to send the Olympics to Paris:

London 2012 closing ceremony that organisers have promised will be a celebration of British music “from Adele to Elgar”.

In contrast to the sometimes stilted formalities, they promised a giant after-show party featuring a “melting pot of British creativity”, some of the biggest names in music, 4,100 performers and the obligatory closing fireworks.

Oh Dear Lord.

Adele warbling about the Malvern Hills, just what we need.

The four ceremonies together will cost £81m, after the government used public funds to double the budget following a presentation to the prime minister by Boyle and Stephen Daldry.

That’s £2.75 from every income tax payer in the country. For Jive Bunny Mastermix Party which near none of the people paying for it can go to.

Given the drug consumption of the athletes who can indeed go to it wouldn’t it be simpler just to play an Inspiral Carpets album?

And we all know what the bloody “melting pot” is going to be. Sting with a bit of Byrd and Tallis accompanied by crumhorns, something by a Stone, they might dig Bowie out to sing “Heroes”, Mr. “No Child Porn Here” Townsend will windmill his arm and they’ll unhook Sir Paul from his joint for long enough to lead the assembled masses in a rendition of Hey Fucking Jude as the final song. At some point Adele will warble to piano: if only it were Rule Britannia, eh?

Nah, send it off to Paris. At least they’ve got Jonny Halliday who is naff enough by nature to fit right in and for the final song they can have Plastic Bertrand. His “Ca Plage Pour Moi”, while by a Belgian, is just right. This beach is mine, don’t you forget it or I’ll beat you and the horse you rode in on to a bloody pulp….just right as an intro to Rio in four years time.

 



Posted: 24th, February 2012 | In: London Olympics Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink