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Anorak News | Kate Middleton is pregnant – Peter Andre, Katie Price and Kerry Katona will be delighted

Kate Middleton is pregnant – Peter Andre, Katie Price and Kerry Katona will be delighted

by | 9th, March 2012

KATE Middleton places a hand on her tum-tum and waves to the crowd. To her side OK! delivers the headline is bold yellow ink:

“A ROYAL BABY”

Can it be that Kate is pregnant? Kate is touching her stomach in the way pregnant women do in the tabloids. And that headline does crete the impression that Middleton is up the duff. Only the smaller print informs us:

“How having a baby will transform her life”.

While we wait other OK! exclusives – “How being fired from a canon would affect Peter Andre’s kids?”; “How Prince Harry marrying Kerry Katona would change her life”; and “How taking two bottles into the shower might ha ve saved Diana” – we learn from a “royal insider” – NOT the embryo – that:

“Catherine and William are the first future monarchs in 200 years who haven’t conceived in their first year of marriage.”

You can still smell the cordite from some of those ancient forays into marriage and birth. But there must be no pressure on that tum-tum, Kate. Wills, just try to relax. Sure OK! is watching Kate’s womb with a keen eye, noting her every move for signs of pregnancy and if the future King of Queen is causing her breasts to swell, but there really is no pressure.

There’s always Prince Harry as a back-up if the swimmers and eggs don’t fuse. And Queen Kerry has a certain ring to it…

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Posted: 9th, March 2012 | In: Key Posts, Royal Family Comment (1) | TrackBack | Permalink