Simon Cowell finds intruder in his house! Everyone looks at Louis Walsh
IMAGINE the horror of someone breaking into your house with a mental look in their eye. Of course, if it happened to you, no-one actually cares. You have to be famous for people to show sympathy about such matters. And Simon Cowell, a man who doesn’t get much kindness from the world, found himself with a nutter in his house!
No, it wasn’t Louis Walsh masturbating in the lean-to.
Cowell had just settled down in his London mansion on Saturday night to watch himself on ITV’s Jonathan Ross show (of course he’s the kind of person who watches himself on television) when he heard a noise.
His spokesman Max Clifford told the Sun: “There was a loud bang and Simon rushed upstairs to find out what was going on. It came from the bathroom so he went in — and there was a woman standing there holding a brick. She had smashed her way in through the window and it was unclear how long she had been there or what she was doing.”
Cowell’s on-site security team detained the woman until police arrived to arrest her. Leanne Zaloumis, 29, has been charged with aggravated burglary and is due to appear before West London Magistrates’ court this morning.
“It was very frightening for Simon who told me it was like something from a horror movie,” said Clifford.
Although, not nearly as harrowing as the sound of Steve Brookstein singing or Gareth Gates’ wimpering sexual climax when he was roughly ridden by Katie Price.
Swings and roundabouts.