Caroline Flack ‘still on’ with One Direction’s Harry Styles (Also: Legal action)
DESPITE being one of the most unsettling celebrity relationships in recent history (still nowhere near the levels of mind meltery that is The Krankies), not many people seemed to really care that 82 year old Caroline Flack was getting some slap and tickle with the 18 month old Harry Styles from One Direction.
Even so, for the good of the 1D fans, the couple split up so that he could portray the Sexually Available card, which of course, really means, All Your Pocket Money Belongs To Me Now. A single Harry Styles is a waddling, winking piggy bank.
HOWEVER! It appears that the Xtra Factor host hasn’t finished counting Styles’ pubes yet and was caught telling a bartender at a Soho bar (you can imagine how awful that establishment is) that she and Harry Styles were “still on.” That’s at-odds with the story that he’s been showing a lot of attention to the age-appropriate American singer, Lily Halpern.
Maybe Flack is a mental stalker who won’t give up on Styles, even though he’s moved on? Maybe Harry is getting the tip wet with as many people as possible like a dirty tart?
That said, Flack doesn’t understand why we’re at all interested: “These are just silly stories in a very serious world. When you think of the real news stories – people around the world dying of starvation, being killed in conflicts or born into poverty – and then you think what I did: I went out with a younger guy and I am the front page news… it’s just absurd.”
Sounds like the excuses of a pervy old woman from here. Even so, there’s some legal action afoot which could harm Harry’s arousal levels as an American band called One Direction have started legal action with the boyband. The US One Direction have demanded that Simon Cowell change the name of the group as they claim they were there first.
Zayn Malik reportedly said: “We don’t know what will happen but we’re not changing our name.” The Americans have smelled dollar and said they aren’t going to back down, despite Simon Cowell’s obvious nefarious power. Oh, and look at that, the American group has already received death threats since taking legal action!