Bono gets a spider named after him, which is good news for spider-haters
ONLY insane people like spiders. People are rightly terrified of them. They’ve got too many eyes, too many legs, fart out indestructible silk and probably lay eggs in your tear-ducts when you’re asleep. As such, when we see spiders, we either run away shrieking or roll up the newspaper and go to town on their horrible, shining abdomens.
When new types of horrible spider are discovered, they need names and one chap has decided to name one arachnid after U2 front-bozo, Bono.
Biologist Jason Bond of Auburn University in Alabama named one spider after Bono, which is excellent news for every right thinking person. Bond chose the name Aptostichus bonoi as he found the trapdoor spider living in California’s Joshua Tree National Park.
Of course, one of U2’s most famous LPs is 1987’s ‘The Joshua Tree’. He could’ve called it after Gram Parsons who was a much better artist and much more fond of the Joshua Tree itself, but no matter.
So what’s the good news about this?
Well, should any of us stumble across a spider, we can now beat it to death, guilt-free, because it might just be one of those Bono Spiders.
Well done Jason Bond. You may have made an entire type of insect extinct by your naming behaviour. Flies can now breathe a sigh of relief. If they have lungs.