CBS declares war on the predictable women of pop: Grammy sexbots puy a cardi on it
SIDE Boob, arse cleavage, dresses made- see-through by the camera flashes, mons pubis, invisible knickers, moobs, camel toes and front tails are banned from the Grammys. All simulated acts of self-rubbing will be of the over-the-clothes variety, and sponsored by Anusol and other anti-itching aids. Should Rihanna feel a need to pretend to lick human sauces from her fingers and lips, she will be handed a jam doughnut and finger bowl.
CBS’ Standard and Practice Department pulled on their burkas and sent an email to the powers that be:
Date: February 5, 2013, 10:39:56 PM EST
Subject: 55th GRAMMYS: Standard And Practice Wardrobe Advisory
-kindly confirm receipt of s&p standards-
CBS Program Practices advises that all talent appearing on camera please adhere to Network policy concerning wardrobe.
Please be sure that buttocks and female breasts are adequately covered. Thong type costumes are problematic. Please avoid exposing bare fleshy under curves of the buttocks and buttock crack. Bare sides or under curvature of the breasts is also problematic. Please avoid sheer see-through clothing that could possibly expose female breast nipples. Please be sure the genital region is adequately covered so that there is no visible “puffy” bare skin exposure. Please avoid commercial identification of actual brand name products on T-shirts. Foreign language on wardrobe will need to be cleared. OBSCENITY OR PARTIALLY SEEN OBSCENITY ON WARDROBE IS UNACCEPTABLE FOR BROADCAST. This as well, pertains to audience members that appear on camera. Finally, The Network requests that any organized cause visibly spelled out on talent’s wardrobe be avoided. This would include lapel pins or any other form of accessory.
Photo: Jennifer Lopez and her Puffy pal.