Kim Kardashian thinks about her baby on meth
KIM Kadashian is in DuJour Magazine. The teaser boasts that this is the first in-depth celebrity interview conducted from within the subject matter:
Fearless in the face of scrutiny and a hopeless romantic in a cynical age, everywoman Kim is impossible to define.
But feel free to try. Kim is the 5ft 2inch beige wall whose mother turned an internet screw into a range of underwear, linen and perfume.
Kim then speaks, telling us that she ready for new challenges:
“I used to always say I can’t wait to get pregnant because I will just eat whatever I want, but it’s completely different. I’m like, OK, I want to eat as healthy as possible. Though lately I’ve been watching shows like I’m Pregnant and Addicted to Meth. It definitely makes me feel better if I’m wanting one sip of Diet Coke or, you know, too much sugar. I’m like, This woman is on meth.”
Being Kim Kardashian is hard work. This is the woman who “spritzes her whole body with scent, to make sure every inch is covered”. Why? Because in real life she smells of nothingness. She is the anodyne CGI avatar made flesh. Chin the Diet Coke (Koke), Kim, and then forgive the embryo when it bursts forth and demands meth. Nine months inside the machine and you’d crave a fast-track sensory experience…