We kid you not – man to marry his goat
A BRAZILIAN bloke is going to get married to his pet goat, which isn’t sinister at all. Aparecido Castaldo, aged 74, has decided to end his days as a bachelor boy and marry his beloved Carmelita.
The happy couple will totter down the aisle next month in Igreja do Diabo (or, in English, the Devil’s Church) in the Brazilian city of Jundiai.
Aparecido has been in love with his stinking pet for two years and says a goat has advantages over a human companion.
“She doesn’t speak and doesn’t want money,” says the father of eight presumably traumatised children, who have been vomiting into their laps, solidly, since their clearly troubled father broke the news.
The ceremony is scheduled for midnight and will be followed by a big party on All Souls’ Day the following day. A party that will presumably consist of a man crying over a goat and no-one else.
Carmelita ate her first wedding dress but has been found another, said Aparecido.
“Whenever someone says I am doing something wrong I reply the goat does not speak, ask for money to go shopping and doesn’t get pregnant – and she can’t talk.”
The ceremony will be conducted by a bishop who said:
“This is not the first goat he has, because he likes animals. He just needs a companion. There will be no intercourse between the two.”
That makes the whole situation completely normal then, doesn’t it?