Chelsea Balls: Romeo Ashley Cole Makes Pascal Craymer Think Of Brad Pitt
READERS who recall stories of Chelsea footballer Ashley Cole’s vomit-fuelled extra-martial sex will enjoy the Sun’s report on the player’s love affair with “Ex-Towie star” Pascal Craymer:
ROMEO Ashley Cole has been made to wait THREE MONTHS for sex with his new flame.
Is that Romeo the symbol of doomed eternal love? Romeo who wrote in his book:
When I heard Jonathan Barnett (player’s agent) repeat the figure of £55K, I nearly swerved off the road. He (former Arsenal Director David Dein) is taking the piss Jonathan! I yelled down the phone. I was so incensed. I was trembling with anger. I couldn’t believe what I’d heard.
Romeo of whom it was said:
“We started having sex but it wasn’t long before he said he felt sick again. Then he just rolled over and vomited on the floor, all over the cream carpet. It was disgusting. He had some mouthwash, then jumped back into bed…Eventually he finished and collapsed on to my chest. He was panting and clearly had a good time.”
As Romeo said:
Bid a sick man in sadness make his will:
Ah, word ill urged to one that is so ill!…
Says [Juliet] Ceaymer:
“I don’t just fall into a guy’s arms. I make him earn it. Jennifer Aniston made Brad Pitt wait nine months for sex.”
And they’re still together, aren’t they?