Chelsea Balls: Blues Ban Fan For Being Annoying
CHELSEA fan Connor is banned from Stamford Bridge. Why? What did he do? Is he a hooligan, a Headhunter? Did he call someone a “fu*king black cu*t“? No. That doesn’t get you a stadium ban. That just gets you banned from going on the pitch during the game.
No. What Connor did was to engage is ‘Persistent Standing’.
He is guilty of what police, Government and everyone who hates football calls “anti-social behaviour”. He is guilty of displaying passion.
Oh, of course, the illiberal elite have told us that standing at football matches leads to another Hillsborough. That’s utter balls. It was this same illiberal elite treating the fans worse than animals that led to the deaths of 96 fans in 1989. The dead were, in the words of the Sunday Times, “slum people watching a slum sport”. And you can die at all-seater stadia, as many did at South Africa’s Ellis Park in 2001.
This Chelsea fan’s crime was to have annoyed a fellow fan seated behind. Doubtless the alleged stander was observed by officials. They saw enough. His offence has earned him a suspension for the Blues’ final game of the season against Norwich City.
Now, people standing in front of you can be annoying. But that shrill woman who sat nine rows behind me at Arsenal was no less annoying. Her shrieking “Sid-own”was enough for me to move seats. The Palace fan who sits behind our Ed and commands the Eagles “Rap it up Palace” is annoying. The pisspoor England Supporters’ Band, the sound of lost causes, are terrifically annoying. The Wembley DJ turning up his Party Anthems ’96 album and drowning out the fans’ chanting to screech “MAKE SOME NOISE!” is annoying. Jesters hats want burning. The loud fan who is only funny to his one idiot mate is annoying. The bore at Bournemouth who yells “Come on Boscombe” is annoying.
But would you ban them? No. You’d let the fans sought it out. You’d bring back standing; charge less for those who wants to stand, meaning they’d arrive earlier to get the better spots and would be more likely to create a noisy atmosphere – something the annoying Mexican Wave and Jamie Carragher (“Mupper, shufflegums billow bow thrwoup strikers”) and his fellow TV pundits cannot.
Here’s the letter Connor received from the Blues “security” wonk”. It’s a safety issue, people:
And here are 10 other things banned from grounds.