Manchester United Balls: Di Maria Invites You To Kick His Family In The Face
EVERY time you kick Manchester United’s Angel Di Maria in the shins, you kick his wife and daughter in the face. Well, not really them, more the photograph of the player’s family he keeps tucked into his socks.
Now that opposing player’s know the picture is there, will they avoid kicking Di Maria’s legs? And if they do, will other players try similar aproaches to win sympathy?
John Terry could carry a picture of his beloved wife inside his jockstrap and a photo of his smiling children printed on the bandana wrapped around his head.
And why stop with human beings? Newcastle United’s beleagured manager Alan Pardew could wear a T-shirt with the picture of a small polar bear on the front, a speech bubble emerging from the critter’s mother urges readers to stick with Pards and save the planet. Or better yet, why not invite Pardew to carry a live, adopted puppy tucked beneath his arm at all times? Who attacks a man with a puppy? And remember that for every day he remains in the job, Newcastle will donate £1000 to the local dogs charity. And they need the money lest all the dogs die…