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Manchester United: Di Maria does the maths

by | 7th, August 2015

di maria top trumpsManchester United lost £15m on Angel Di Maria, who after a single season at Old Trafford joined PSG for £44m this week.

The Telegraph says he “apologises to Manchester United for his dismal form”.

He’s lent his name to an open letter:

“I write this note to thank all the Manchester United family for the great support received during the year I’ve been part of this Club.  I’m aware things didn’t work as we all expected and believe me, I feel really sorry about it.”

Really? Surely he would should have stayed to make it better. Words are cheap – cheaper than a player whose combined transfer fees make him the world’s costliest.

“I can guarantee you it was not for trying. I did my best but football is not like maths: often a lot of things out of our control affect the way we feel and the way things turn out.”

He cannot control the way he feels. Those are not the words of professional, are they? No job is like maths. Some jobs, like assembling iPhones or cleaning tables in McDonald’s, require far less free thought than maths. Maybe Di Maria could have improved his mood and thus his performances by turning out dressed in a relaxing rubber sumo outfit or aproaching each game as if taking a maths exam, reciting his 9 times table, sticking a lucky gonk down his pants and writing ‘Slide Rule Pass’ in felt tip on his palms. And there is always the data-driven fun of Top Trumps to remind him of the best qualities of his United teammates.

Di Maria ends his open letter by stating:”

“I am sorry it did not work out as I would have wished in this amazing huge club.”

But it did work out. He earned a fortune and left for another fortune.

 



Posted: 7th, August 2015 | In: manchester united, Sports Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink