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Anorak | Keeping Up With The Danczuks: toenails, orgies, escorts and God

Keeping Up With The Danczuks: toenails, orgies, escorts and God

by | 4th, January 2016

DAnczuk sex

 

Keeping up with the Danczuks: a look at Labour MP and anti-paedo activist Simon Danczuk and assorted women in the tabloids.

Daily Mirror (Page 7): “Shamed MP to sue over ex’s claim he is sex predator”.

Mrs Danczuk Number 1, Sonia Rossington, claims her then husband had sex with her while she asleep. She was, she alleged, asleep before the sex began. She did not drop off during the act. Now Simon is to “take legal action” over those claims.

A ‘close friend” of his tells the paper, “If some of the allegations Sonia makes are true then why didn’t she go to the  police at the time.? Why is she only coming out with this now?”

Maybe the same pal can ask that question of Jimmy Savile’s alleged victims and other people who have made recent claims to have been molested by the great and not all that good?

The Sun (front page): “Danczuk: It’s time to pray.”

“Shamed” MP Simon and Mrs Danczuk Number 2 Karen are at a church.

We learn that his first wife, the aforesaid Sonia, “had been paid by men for group hotel romps”.

Pages 8-9: “1st Missus was orgy sex worker” – “an escort who  took part in paid orgies.” We don’t know if that’s true. But you might have encountered Stephanie36HH – those letters not a reference to her pencils, rather her breasts.

The Sun also reminds us that Simon exchanged “horny” texts with teenaged Sophena Houlihan, aka Goddess Rosalie Von Morelli, who used to sell bras, knickers (both used) and toenail clippings.

A Sun “source” claims Sonia “told a pal he wanted to put hair-removal cream in Karen’s shampoo”.

Daily Mail (Pages 14-15): “Danczuk ‘got so drunk he forgot he sent sex texts to girl, 17”.

Curse that autocomplete! We can only be thankful that drunk Simon never expressed his desire to spank someone else on his Twitter feed. Moreover, let us give thanks Simon never fell awkwardly on his phone and had it inserted up his arse. A hundred vicars in A & E shudder at the idea and vow never to use a mobile whilst naked ever again.  

Conclusion: it could be worse.



Posted: 4th, January 2016 | In: News, Politicians, Tabloids Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink