Is Nothing Safe? Man accused of public sex with motorbike
Is Nothing Safe? To Folkestone Magistrates’ Court, from where the Sun brings news of a man accused of “‘trying to have sex with a SUZUKI MOTORBIKE’ in city centre”.
Which begs the question: if not a city centre, where is it ok for a man to attempt coitus with a motorbike? Should we all be aware lest we spot something nasty in the local bike enthusiast’s garage?
The Sun explains:
Kevin Chapman, 33, is accused of exposing himself in a busy city centre while allegedly simulating sex with a sleekly designed blue Suzuki.
Like the slim ones do you, sir? Does the look of the bike matter? The paper goes on to describe the bike as a “beautifully-crafted vehicle”. This was not on ugly old bike. It was a racy number. The paper adds:
Kevin Chapman denies having sex with a motorbike and claims he was pushed into the vehicle while his trousers were down.
Kent Live notes that Mr Chapman also denies “kicking and pushing the motorbike and said he was pushed into the vehicle by homeless people”.
Chapman, from Ashford in Kent, pleaded not guilty to indecent exposure and causing criminal damage to the bike at Folkestone Magistrates’ Court. He had “no recollection” of indecently exposing himself on March 27.