X Factor: Gordon Brown Has XXX With Danyl Johnson And Stacey Solomon
X Factor Watch: Gordon Brown makes his mark with Danyl Johnson and Stacey Solomon, Jedward hanged until dancing, Alexandra Burke gets some sick PR and more…
Daily Telegraph: “Jedward can win, says Louis, as X Factor accused of giving pair second chance”
…it has been claimed that the organisers of the show gave Jedward a second chance in that they appeared at auditions in London in May before their successful attempt in Glasgow only days later. The evidence, it is claimed, is visible in two video clips from the separate trials.
What’s this talk of trials? Is being unable to sing and dance now a crime in our celebrity obsessed land? It is the talentless that are the novelty acts. Send them down to be hanged until they dance.
Sweet Charidee
Sussex Express: “Fans could sing with X Factor star”
A star?
KARAOKE kings and queens could win a recording session with Ben Mills from X Factor in a charity competition. Demelza Hospice Care for Children, which looks after youngsters across East Sussex, announced the contest this week.
Posted: 3rd, November 2009 | In: Celebrities Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
SCARE Stories: Every day the Daily Mail scours scientific research journals, reports from vested-interest groups and the thoughts of NGO’s and publishes the scare stories as facts. Anorak picks the best:
* “Can cuddling you pet give you MRSA?”
* “Why too much Sudoku could ruin your figure”
Posted: 29th, September 2009 | In: Scare Stories Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Jack Tweed’s Suicide Watch With Jade Goody
JACK Tweed says he wants to kill himself. In “JACK: I WANT TO KILL MYSELF”, the News of The World places Mr Jade Goody on suicide watch – “nor death shall us part”.
Beneath a picture of Tweed, readers are told:
QUIET NIGHT IN: Prison beans and orange squash is far from Jack Tweed’s usual Champagne style
One would venture that Tweed is sipping on “prison orange squash”. But we should not interrupt the facts as Jack’s mum, Mary Tweed, tells her story to the tabloids, and so – finally! – welcomes a bona fide outlet of Jade Goody Industries.
THE distraught mum of rape charge widower Jack Tweed told yesterday of her torment at seeing her “baby” in prison and hearing him threaten to take his own life.
Posted: 27th, September 2009 | In: Celebrities, Gallery, Key Posts Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Full Details Of Katie Price’s Rape
ONE whole day on from news that Katie Price would no longer speak of her rape, the News of The World screams:
Jordan relives agony of her sex ordeal
JORDAN today reveals shocking details of her rape by a mystery TV celebrity for the first time. The 31-year-model ended up in bed with the star at a drunken party in London - only for him to turn nasty when she said she didn’t want sex.
Does she? Before we discover the truth, reach under the duvet and grab hold of the details:
“I said no - but he wouldn’t take no for an answer,” she confided to a pal. “He said ‘How about a b***j**’. I was horrified and burst into tears,” she told her friend. Now every time I see his face on TV I shudder. It brings back such horrible memories.”
Posted: 20th, September 2009 | In: Celebrities, Gallery, Key Posts Comments (4) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
How To Make Keith Floyd’s Last Supper
KEITH Floyd, TV chef and bon vivant, has died and the tributes pour in to man being shaped by media.
The Independent leads with “KEITH FLOYD’S LAST LUNCH”. The Express also has news of this “amazing last lunch”. And the Mail gives the game away with a front-page menu of oysters, porridge and champagne.
The impression is of Floyd embracing life to the last, facing death not with an oxygen mask and tube but a massive blow out. The Times even creates legendary last words:
Keith Floyd’s last words (after champagne and oysters): ‘I’ve not felt this well for ages’
The Sun picks up on the theme and the Floyd vernacular by announcing:
“Hell-raising chef drops dead.”
And Floyd’s death was not without a wry humour, as the story goes in the Telegraph:
Keith Floyd died hours after lunch to celebrate cancer all-clear
After the lunch he returned to his partner’s Dorset home and excitedly told friends on the telephone that he had not felt so well for years. Floyd, a forerunner of television chefs Jamie Oliver and Gordon Ramsay, had settled down on the sofa to watch a Channel 4 documentary about his 25 years in the public eye when he suffered the heart attack and lost consciousness.
The worthy Oliver and vain Ramsay make us miss Floyd all the more. But the dying man slumped on the sofa is not in keeping with the legend being created or of the man, a modern Confessions of a Flesh-Eater. So we get this:
Floyd, in his trademark bow tie, and Mrs Martin had gone to Hix Oyster and Fish House in Lyme Regis run by fellow celebrity chef Mark Hix. The £120 lunch was to be his last meal. Lunch included Champagne with a cherry soaked in apple eau de vie, £11.50, a glass of Pouilly Vinzelles 2006 Burgundy, £49 a bottle, Oysters with potted shrimp and toast, £12.70, two glasses Fils Cotes de Rhône 2007, £21.50 a bottle, Red Legged partridge with bread sauce, £21.50, pear cider made into jelly, £6.50. The lunch included a number of cigarettes. The lunch went on the menu yesterday as “Floyd’s Last Supper”.
Tasteful. And what he would have wanted:
Mr Hix said: “He ordered the grouse but my chef served partridge. He saw the funny side of it. He told my manager to slow down on the booze. He wouldn’t have been the same without a glass of wine in his hand.”
Which is why the Express and Telegraph both lead with picture of Floyd raising a class of vino du moment.
But not everyone is on message. Brian Viner watches:
One well-known roisterer, Keith Allen, went in search of another, the former TV chef Keith Floyd, finding him in a village near Avignon looking terrible, at least one decade and possibly two older than his 65 years.
There is already plenty of evidence to suggest that Floyd is not a particularly nice man, and plenty more emerged here, but his unflagging capacity to drink, smoke and swear to excess – including a liberal sprinkling of the c-word, which has officially lost its status as the last TV taboo – was seemingly enough to convince Allen that he was “one of the most honest and genuine people I’ve ever met”. Now, I don’t mean to sound pious. I’ve even been known to enjoy a spot of carousing myself. But there was nothing honest or genuine in the gruesome spectacle of Floyd getting steadily more hammered, more melancholy and more abusive at a lunch with his daughter Poppy, from whom he had been estranged for 10 years. It was car-crash television.
How do we remember the dead celebrity – as his TV image or as the man?
Keith Floyd RIP, A Career In Pictures
Posted: 16th, September 2009 | In: Celebrities Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Jack Tweed Weeps For ‘Sick And Dirty’ Sex With Lisa O’Connor
JACK Tweed, Mr Jade Goody, continues his mission to become a bona fide celebrity by telling New! magazine readers of his sex with a glamour model.
Readers don’t hear how often Jack did it, just that Jack felt “sick and dirty” - which might be a sign that it was great sex.
The mo-del, one Lisa O’Connor, 21, recently sold her story News Of The World, offering:
“I was walking through the club, minding my own business, when Jack stood in my way to stop me. He didn’t mean anything malicious, but he was definitely trying it on. I think that was his way of flirting - but he’s just not very good at it.”
Which is why before the night was out he had penetrated her.
Posted: 21st, July 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Farrah Fawcett’s Ryan O’Neal Seen With Another Woman
FARRAH Fawcett is not long dead and her long-term lover Ryan O’Neal is grieving. Perfect time, then, for the Daily Mail to release the news that he has been spotted with another woman:
The Hollywood star strolled barefoot through the surf on a Californian beach with his arm over the shoulder of the unnamed woman.
Posted: 4th, July 2009 | In: Celebrities Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
AS Bat E Bird says in the CCN Forums: Forget about that singer bloke - Mrs. Slocombe’s dead!
Molly Sugden RIP.
Beep!
Hollywood actor Karl Malden die…
* CCN - Celebrity Cancer News is Anorak’s media alert system that keeps you news vultures on top of doom and gloom.
Posted: 1st, July 2009 | In: Celebrities Comments (12) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Filming Farrah Fawcett’s Funeral For A Sequel
FARRAH Fawcett’s funeral has been filmed for a sequel? Anorak’s Man in LA picks up an invitation:
Camera crews filmed Farrah Fawcett’s funeral in downtown Los Angeles this afternoon, apparently for the sequel to Ryan O’Neal’s “Farrah’s Story” television special that sadly had the same Hollywood ending as his “Love Story” movie forty years ago.
Posted: 1st, July 2009 | In: Celebrities Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
National Enquirer Correctly Predicted Michael Jackson’s Death
The National Enquirer Correctly Predicted Jackson’s Death.
THANKS to CCN, Anorak’s Celebrity Cancer News alert system, none of you missed out on knowing that Michael Jackson had died. Some of you heard the knews minutes before Jackson died; others months in advance.
WARNING: CCN is not affiliated with CCN 24, which announces the deaths of celebrities all day every day in the hope that once it will be bang on the money and announce a star’s death at the exact moment they actually die.
Posted: 29th, June 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Michael Jackson Dies Without His Nose On
MICHAEL Jackson has died without his nose on. This news is brought to you by CCN - Celebrity Cancer News - Anorak’s media alert system that keeps you news vultures on top of doom and gloom.
As Anorak’s Man in LA Reports:
Entertainment Tonight is running and distributing what’s billed as Michael Jackson’s final photo, which is slightly misleading as it depicts Jacko’s lifeless corpse being wheeled into UCLA Medical Center. A study of the photo reveals one detail that’s yet to be commented on: Michael Jackson is missing the tip of his nose.
Posted: 27th, June 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts Comments (86) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Katie Price’s Boyfriend Talks Sex With Jordan
PETER Andre and Jordan Watch: Katie Price missies Harvey’s sports day and her fella confessses…
WITH Michael Jackson and Farrah Fawcett now dead, Katie Price and Peter Andre move one step up the celebrity ladder. It might have been better news, but Harrison Ford and Jeff Goldblum aer just resting.
Advertorial: “Stick with Celebrity Cancer News (CCN) – “Twitter is a decent celebrity death alert system, with Anorak’s CCN readers are advised to stick with our own CCN - since 2009! For a small fee, Anorak will feature your message on our CCN bulletins. (Order now and get five alerts for the price of three!)” - A Source
As Katie Price Twittered: “Ooooh my god sooo shocked rest in peace mj you were the KING OF POP a total legend xxxxxxxxxxx.”
Amen to that.
Beep! An alert coming in – Katie Price is feeling “out of sports”.
Daily Mail: “Bad sport: Jordan pulls out of Harvey’s school event over fears of facing other parents”
She’s rarely one to deny herself a moment in the spotlight, but Katie Price was a no-show yesterday at eldest son Harvey’s sports day. The glamour model pulled out of the school event at the last minute amid fears that the other parents would be critical over her recent separation from husband Peter Andre.
Katie, 31, who works under the stage name Jordan, is believed to have been en route to her disabled son’s school in Kent, but ‘bottled it’ halfway, according to a friend.
Run Harvey! Run! No, not you! Him!
Posted: 27th, June 2009 | In: Celebrities Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Michael Jackson’s Death Triggers Knife Fight
MICHAEL Jackson Watch: In Miami, aboard a Florida bus, news of Michael Jackson’s death is causing a knife fight among passengers.
The question is ever the question: should Jackson we remembered as the outstanding musical talent of his generation or for other matters?
We join the action as passenger James Kiernan receives a text message about Jackson’s death on his cell phone, delivered by CCN – Anorak’s Celebrity Cancer News alert system - never miss a celebrity death again!
Kiernan reads the text aloud.
Posted: 27th, June 2009 | In: Celebrities Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Michael Jackson Has Heart Attack
MICHAEL Jackson has had a heart attack. This is a bulletin from CCN - Celebrity Cancer News, Anorak’s media alert system that keeps you abreast of world events with doom-laden messages of celebrity illnesses.
Pop star Michael Jackson was rushed to a hospital this afternoon by Los Angeles Fire Department paramedics.
Capt. Steve Ruda said paramedics responded to a call at Jackson’s home around 12:26 p.m. He was not breathing when they arrived. The parademics performed CPR and took him to UCLA Medical Center, Ruda told The Times.
Spotter: Cheryl
Michael Jackson Dies Without His Nose On
The Five Craziest Michael Jackson Death Theories
Posted: 25th, June 2009 | In: Celebrities Comments (12) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Farrah Fawcett’s ‘Pulp Fiction’ Marriage
ANORAK’S Man in LA continues to look at Farrah Fawcett’s celebrity cancer:
Says TB:
Wonder if hard-hitting news veteran Barbara Walters will get to the bottom of the controversy over Ryan O’Neal’s control over cancer-stricken Farrah Fawcett in her final days? Wonder no more. The promotion department at ABC is working overtime to hype the 20/20 segment that airs Friday night, and the big “get” is O’Neal’s insistence that the iconic actress has agreed to marry him on her deathbed.
Says O’Neal: “We will (marry), as soon as she can say ‘yes.’”
“As soon as she can say ‘yes.’”
Posted: 24th, June 2009 | In: Celebrities Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Jack Tweed Meets Calum Best In His Wedding Suit
MORE news on Jack Tweed, Mr Jade Goody, and his efforts to be a jobbing celebrity. Can “TRAGIC Jade Goody’s husband Jack Tweed” keep the family business alive?
The Sun looks on and sees Jack Tweed as he “spends a boozy day at Ascot yesterday — in his WEDDING SUIT”.
Well, you never know who you’re going to meet. But Jack should resist an on-the-spot marriage and instead take things slower, or at least wait until the magazine deal has been struck.
Posted: 20th, June 2009 | In: Celebrities Comments (5) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Melissa Joan Hart Prays For Farrah Fawcett’s Cover
BY now you’ll be wondering what happened to Melissa Joan Hart, the former “Sabrina the Teenage Witch” star.
Well, news is that she got large – or become a woman of “stature”, a Americans have it. She was heavy. She was what we British call a bloater. She was fat. Fat. FAT!
Now slimmer than she was,. Melissa is on the cover of People magazine and, as Page Six reports, “overheard off-camera at KTLA in Los Angeles on Friday saying how she’d been hoping last week that cancer-stricken Farrah Fawcett wouldn’t die - and thus bump Hart off the cover of People magazine.”
Posted: 3rd, June 2009 | In: Celebrities Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Farrah Fawcett ‘Banned’ From Seeing German Doctor
FARRAH Fawcett’s Celebrity Cancer continues to interest Anorak’s Man in LA:
EXCLUSIVE: Farrah Fawcett’s friends say Ryan O’Neal won’t let her see the German doctor who treated her cancer and extended her life
Farrah Fawcett’s Hollywood friends say Ryan O’Neal is stopping the iconic actress’s German doctor from treating or visiting her in what appears to be the final stages of her battle with cancer, and denying the Hollywood legend one last chance at survival.
Posted: 3rd, June 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts Comments (15) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Farrah Fawcett’s Love Letter Fight
FARRAH FAWCETT’S celebrity cancer – on Celebrity Cancer News – is being watched by Anorak’s Man in LA.
In “Farrah Fawcett’s business partner and college beau fights visit ban by inundating Ryan O’Neal with Farrah fans’ cards and letters” he tells us:
As the Farrah Fawcett cancer plays out behind closed doors in a Beverly Hills area high-rise, one of her lifelong friends who’ve been denied access to her is striking back at her caretakers in a most unusual way.
Posted: 2nd, June 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts Comments (3) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Michael Jackson At The Skin Cancer Shop
MORE news on Michael Jackson, of whom the Sun says:
“STRAINED MICHAEL JACKSON leaves a medical centre — with a bag printed with the stark words: “Skin cancer.”
Who knew you could get skin cancer in a shop? Has the lust to be the subject of an alert on Anorak’s Celebrity Cancer News (CCN) – created a cancer outlet; and, if so, will the outlet go global, a cancer shop at very stage school and Simon Cowell vehicle the world over?
Posted: 23rd, May 2009 | In: Celebrities Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
- The Real Stig on The Great Cathay Pacific Blocked Toilet Mystery
- SoDak-GhostDog on Interview With Survior Of James Arthur Ray’s Sedona Sweat Lodge
- Katie Norman on I’m A Celebrity: Joe Bugner’s Career In Pictures
- HOTWATER on Madeleine McCann: The Media Creates A New Maddie Monster And Twists The Facts
- yampster on Dundee Woman Accused Of Ripping Out Lover’s Testes With Her Bare Hands
