Katie Price And Peter Andre In Slash Horror
MORE Peter Andre and Katie Price news as amid a fight at the Mayfair Hotel, bookmakers slash the odds of the pair reunited their camera crews and giving it one more shot.
Ladbrokes has reduced the odds of a Peter Andre-Katie Price re-renewal of vows (they renewed their vows on a TV show having made their original vows before God and OK!) from 100/1 to 4/1.
Whether he bookmakers would take money from Katie or Peter’s PR camps is a moot point. The odds are one thing, the size of the betting market another. A wager of anything over a pound might be turned down by the bookmakers, suspicious of fixing.
One day on from news of a reconciliation, Peter Andre, along with Mel B, her husband Stephen Belafonte, Chantelle Houghton and Nicola McLean are dining with Katie’s former agent Claire Powell at the Mayfair Hotel. That’s them bathed in an orangey glow sat before plates covered in hand-reared breast meat.
Posted: 8th, October 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Peter Andre Advertises For Sex, Katie Price Breastfeeds
NEWLY divorced TV married couple Peter Andre and Katie Price contine to make news. Anorak rounds up the sensation:
NoTW: “Saint Pete get dirty”.
This is Saint Peter who says Katie Price makes “dirty money” from her career? This is Saint Peter pictured with his shirt off and his breasts out. This is Peter cocking an arm behind his head and wearing a T-shirt bearing the legend:
“Thursday October 22… Come and Get Me.”
He’ll be in Ikea by the lightbulbs.
The Aussie singer vowed to remain celibate when his marriage to Jordan collapsed. But after five months he has finally picked the day he can have sex again - Thursday, October 22, one day after the divorce becomes final.
Hey, kids, read about your dad’s shag life today? As Pete told the NoTW previously:
I don’t want to get into any slanging matches because I worry about my kids. I’m aware that at some stage they’ll want to go on the internet, read what happened, and see what was said, and I don’t want them to read anything bad their dad has said about their mum.
See: Dignified Peter Andre Slams Katie Price’s Strawberry Ripples
As for Katie…
Daily Mirror: “KATIE CAN’T BEAR TO BE ALONE..SHE IS IN A STATE”
“I’m like a swan,” she told one pal. “Serene and calm on top, but underneath the water I’m paddling like hell.”
But thanks to those Jordans in no immediate risk of drowning.
Meanwhile, Katie is said to be tiring of cage fighter boyfriend Alex Reid - even suggesting he go for plastic surgery to “correct” his looks.
Hey, if those looks got Dean Gaffney a starring role in EastEnders, why change?
Or as Katie says on her TV show, also spotted by the informative Mirror:
“Alex is 100 per cent proper man. Especially sexually.”
But the big shocker is on the cover of the Daily Star:
Daily Star: “I’m new mum to Jordan’s kids”
Who is it?
KATIE PRICE’S arch enemy Nicola McLean has been playing stepmum to her kids. The busty I’m A Celeb… star has just got back from a holiday with Peter Andre at his villa in Marbella.
Katie Price shags homophonous Andre Pinto and Peter Andre’s new stand-in mummy is a Jordan clone? Are they moving on are just circling the celebrity plug hole picking up what they can on the way down.
Here’s caring Nicola, standing on the Jordanettes to peek into the papers:
“Katie will hate it but I’ve been getting really close to both Pete and their kids, especially Junior. Me and Tommy [her husband] have been staying with Pete at his villa in Marbella. We had such a great time and Junior became a bit obsessed with me. He didn’t want to leave my side. He’s so adorable and such an inquisitive little boy. He kept asking me if I loved him and his brother and sister to which I said, ‘Yes’.
Nice stuff form lovely Nicola. Any reason why she’s with Pete?
The frosty relationship soured even more when Jordan’s old manager Claire Powell started looking after Nicola just weeks after dumping the mum-of-three.
Just like she starting handling Chantelle Houghton, another Jordan Lite.
Katie Price might not be all that likeable but she functions as the huge celebrity beast from which wannabe ticks feed, parasites suckling at her breasts hoping for an injection of fame and cash and coming away with a mouthful of bitter dry sand….
Katie Price career in pictures.
Posted: 13th, September 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Bianca Gascoigne In Thigh Boots, Sun Sets On Mars
EARLIER this week, Anorak’s woman in a smock went to the Comfort Prima High Street Fashion Awards at the Battersea Evolution in London. Some of the leading names in ligging were there: Jo Wood, Nicola McLean, Brendan Cole, Lulu and Suranne Jones.
The evening celebrated natural beauty…
Posted: 12th, September 2009 | In: Celebrities, Gallery Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
In This Week’s OK! Katie Price At Gary Cockerill and Phil Turner’s Wedding
IN this week’s OK!, Jordan gets taken up the aisle again as she attends the “Most Outrageous Wedding Of The Year”, a made-for-TV second wedding for Gary Cockerill and Phil Turner.
Gary, we learn, is a make-up artist, of the Roy Lichtenstein school, his face less made-up then printed on wax paper.
OK! readers may wonder if the magazine has turned into a comic book, an impression added to by Phil, who seems set to burst from his silvery suit in the manner of an equal opportunities Marvel comic hero.
In their midst is Katie Price, who is sharing the couple’s first dance. Blessed with the skin tones and dimensions of Disney’s Princess Jasmine, we learn that the wedding’s theme is A Midsummer’s Night Dream.
There are “pixies frolicking in the bushes, frisky fairies cartwheeling on the lawns and giant pacocks parading on stilts with beautiful giant swans by their sides.” And there behind Gary stands Katie’s Puck bunny, Alex Reid.
Posted: 20th, August 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Win A Date With Nicola McLean, And The First Prize Is…
“HOW does a date with jungle babe Nicola McLean sound?”
Well…
Impossible you may say, but you would be wrong!
B-b-but…
Posted: 19th, February 2009 | In: Celebrities Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Scare Stories: Alcopop Lane, Bowel Cancer And Rogarians
SCARE Stories: Alcopop Lane, Bowel Cancer and Rogarians in the Daily Wail…
SUNDAY
“ER, Cheryl, those dimples won’t really make your face weight less” – Liz Jones faces Cheryl Cole”
“Whatever you do don’t let them steal our Christmas” – We must not let those damn Yankees steal our German Christmas trees, Israeli Jesus, French champagne, Icelandic booze brownies, American turkeys and all those other trapping of the British season of goodwill…
MONDAY
Posted: 20th, December 2008 | In: Media, Scare Stories Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
AN insight into life after the celebrity jungle for Nicola McLean.
Happy days…
Spotter: Kela Hazell
Note: If this image is copyrighted please inform us and we will remove it.
Posted: 13th, December 2008 | In: Celebrities, Photojournalism Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Britney Spears Naked Angelina Jolie 9/11 Joe Swash Charlie Brooker Knob Feast
BRITNEY Spears naked, Miley Cyrus naked, Angelina Jolie naked, Israel vs Palestine naked, Joe Swash, iPhone, 9/11 conspiracy, Facebook, MySpace, and Anthea Turner clothed.
There, that should guarantee this column gets oodles of traffic. Thanks to the Guardian’s Aida Edemariam for using that top search fodder in her piece, words also used in frowning Charlie Brooker’s Guardian feature.
Not that Anorak saw it, having spent the past week searching for “Joe Swash pots Nicola McLean” in Paddick’s pocket; McLean being the only women to be snookered by her chest.
Posted: 6th, December 2008 | In: Media Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Nicola McLean Employs The Danielle Lloyd Defence In Trial As The New Kerry Katona
NICOLA McLean and her Jordans are out of the Celebrity jungle and winding down, literally, in an Australian hotel. Is she the new Kerry Katona?
What next for Skippy gonad nosher Nicola? Can roo gonads be frozen and placed into an Iceland pie? Would they impove the texture?
First up, Nicola has to read her “hate mail” and tell Star readers:
“Others wrote ‘cover up you slag’ and some said I was a bully.”
As is the way with any celebrity accused of bullying, the accused should explain at great length that they were bullied at school:
“I was bullied at primary school quite badly. So I would never bully anyone.”
Posted: 5th, December 2008 | In: Celebrities Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Skippy Nicola McLean Knocks David Van Day Into A Cocked Hat
BLUE Peter Garden survivalist Nicola McLean is not only a massive pair of Jordans – she’s a massive pair of Jordans with a lack of self-awareness that would put Tatler’s three witches to shame.
Says Nicola in the Star, which offers her more support than a cheerleader in a Wonderbra:
Posted: 4th, December 2008 | In: Celebrities Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Nicola McLean: Get ‘Em While They’re Hot
WAS Nicola McLean ever entirely in the Blue Peter Jungle?
While McLean’s head was in the right place, her chests were rumoured to be back at the hotel being pampered and prepped for interviews and fame.
Now all of McLean is in the hotel. And the Sun’s former Page 3 columnist and Daily Star mainstay tells us that she is “gagging” for sex with Peterborough United footballer Tommy Williams.
Posted: 3rd, December 2008 | In: Celebrities Comments (5) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Hands On Deck: Inflatable Breasts Lost At Sea
READERS of Australia’s Ralph magazine hoping to get their hands on a pair of free breasts are forced to look elsewhere.
Over 130,000 inflatable breasts, valued at $200,000 have been lost at sea en route to Australia.
Posted: 2nd, December 2008 | In: Strange But True Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Wag The Dog: Carley Zucker Waits For Joe Cole To Stump Up
“IT’S Really, really tough being rich,” says lucky Carly Zucker, Wag to Chelsea and England footballer Joe Cole and Blue Peter garden dweller.
Well, not, that’s not what she said. What she said was:
Posted: 26th, November 2008 | In: Celebrities Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
I’m A Celebrity: Mallett Snookered By McLean
TIMMY Mallett has been “HAMMERED” by his wife (Sun) and then “Bashed” (Star) by Nicola and Carly.
First up to have a go at Mallett is Mrs Lynda Mallet, who says of her man in the day-glo shorts, “He’s an annoying git.”
And it’s hard not to like him for it as Timmy laughs long and too loud at Robert Kilroy-Silk, a man who if he was half as fascinating to others as he is to himself would be stood in a glass box at the British Museum.
Posted: 25th, November 2008 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts Comments (6) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Sheeny On Joe Swash, Jade Goody Would Be Proud
THE Croydonian notices that I’m Celebrity’s Joe Swash might be Jade Goody’s alter ego:
One of the contestants - Joe Swash - moaning about something or other said this,’It’s a bit sheeny, isn’t it?’. Or words to that effect, but he definitely used ’sheeny’,as I reacted at the time. It is not the best known of unfortunate words, but this is what it means, definition taken from here:
Posted: 24th, November 2008 | In: Celebrities Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Nicola McLean’s Optics Illusion To Timmy Mallett’s Little Kilroy-Silk
IN the I’m A Celebrity Jungle “our Nicola” McLean “has still got her boobs out”.
Only she hasn’t. Nicola’s boobs remain restrained in her top waiting for the moment when despair takes root in the celebrity camp and she can uncork out her nipples and dispense a hearty broth (left) and nip of gin (right) to one and all.
Posted: 21st, November 2008 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Reserves Turn Out For I’m A Celebrity
ONLY a very few knew the names of all the celebrities on ITV last night.
You can blame the lack of close up of the Wags, and the fact that Ant ‘n’ Dec were wearing the same kit as the indigenous tribe, but I’m A Celebrity was a game of two halves and little drama.
Good then that the Star has edited highlights of what viewers might have missed as ITV trained its cameras on Berlin.
Posted: 20th, November 2008 | In: Celebrities Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Testes Times In The Celebrity Jungle
THE Daily Star reports that Nicola McLean is “not afraid to get her lips round a croc’s willy”.
How the paper knows this remains a story untold.
Last night we saw the pneumatic model eating kangaroo testes on I’m A Celebrity, so her sucking on a crocodile’s penis is not beyond the realms of possibility - unless of course, the penis is attached to the rest of the reptile and in a state of arousal.
Posted: 18th, November 2008 | In: Celebrities Comments (10) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Nicola McClean On Her Budding Jordans
DAY one in the jungle and Nicola McLean is in a bikini.
Take care Nicola, say celebrity watchers, lest she get bitten and the puncture wounds cause her to leave the camp faster than a pricked balloon.
(Note: For similar reasons, gastric band enthusiast Fern Britton should avoid playing “human catapult” and hanging around with Boy Scouts).
While Mail readers get to see “desperate” Nicola crying for attention, Star readers get to see Nicole sans bra.
Nicola is planning to undergo a third boob job, readers learn, one that should make her “massive”.
Massive is a big word in Nicola life, it is something of an ambition.
Posted: 17th, November 2008 | In: Celebrities Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
I’m A Celebrity: Nicola McLean Loves The Bush
NICOLA McLean is swinging into the I’m A Celebrity jungle on her burning bra straps.
Says Nicola: “I wouldn’t rule out a lesbian liaison… I like to look at girls, especially good looking girls.”
“I’LL SWING BOTH WAYS IN JUNGLE,” says the Sun’s front-page teaser.
The Star’s front-page “exclusive” echoes those words.
Nicola fancies a bushtucker trial with one of the ladies. Not since the heady days of Valerie Singleton, allegedly, has the Blue Peter garden known the like.
Posted: 14th, November 2008 | In: Celebrities Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
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