X Factor: Cheryl Cole Gets Her Own ITV Show, With Rihanna
WHEN the X Factor is finished, ITV will keep us up to speed with the life of Cheryl Cole with a one-off special, entitled Cheryl Cole’s Night In.
Given the tabloid chatter about Cheryl’s marriage to Chelsea and England footballer Ashley Cole – “Ashley blows hot and Cole” (Star);” Is Cheryl Cole’s love life losing the X Factor?” (Daily Mail) – Cheryl might be happy with the company.
We will join Cheryl as she sits on the sofa waiting for Ashley to come home and tell her that Clement Freud joke.
Posted: 23rd, November 2009 | In: Celebrities Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Katie Price’s US Namesake Presents The American Music Awards 2009: In Photos
THE American Music Awards are the season’s latest music industry AGM. All the signed acts and American Idol rejects arrive. Nicole Kidman, Rihanna, Kate Hudson, Paula Abdul’s Phoebe Price – any relation to Britain’s gonad mumcher Katie Price? – The Black Eyed Peas and Jermaine Jackson arrive. And to make up the numbers, American Idol winners and losers pack out the theatre. These awards are not to be confused with the Grammy Awards (GA), the Billboard Music Awards (BAM), MTV Awards, the World Music Awards (WAM) or any other acronym…
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Posted: 23rd, November 2009 | In: Celebrities Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Rihanna’s Slow Striptease Show, In Pictures
RIHANNA has been out and about in London. The singer is famous for rhyming umbrella with “Ella ella eh eh eh”, being beaten up by her then boyfriend Chris Brown (join in - blacken her eye for Peta!) and for appearing in naked pictures leaked on the internet. Oh, and the sex tape.
Those naked shots were just so upsetting, chiefly because Rihanna’s career is a slow striptease and getting to the finale before the seduction might be cutting short her career by weeks and leave the punters feelings short changed.
Posted: 17th, November 2009 | In: Celebrities Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
THE Week in pictures, featuring Lindsay Lohan’s bag, Rihanna’s woman of the year nipple, The Queen’s massive poppy, Take That reunited with Robbie Williams, Daren Gough doing it for England,The Duke of Beaufort’s Hunt, Nikolai Valuev’s height over David Haye’s mouth, Sesame Street, Amy Winehouse’s chest, JLS going GAY, The Westmisnter Bridge Jumper of London, Sam Fox’s front and more shockers…
Posted: 15th, November 2009 | In: Media Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
In Pictures: Rihanna’s Nipples Present Glamour Magazine’s Women Of The Year
ANORAK’S Man in New York was at The 2009 Women of the Year hosted by Glamour Magazine at Carnegie Hall, NY. Also ether were such woman of substance as Rihanna, Serena Williams, Steven Tyler, Andie MacDowell and Rainey Qualley, Anna Chlumsky, Lisa Ling, Amanda Righetti – pause; fans face with hand- Padma Lakshmi, Iman, Stephanie March, Maria Shriver, Katharine McPhee and Estelle.
The top women of the year are the singer Rihanna, for services to getting beaten up and showing your nipples – and Michelle Obama, for being married to Barack Obama, who defeated Hillary Clinton to become president of the world in a fight where racism was defeated by misogyny. The other top women are all given pithy bios:
Posted: 10th, November 2009 | In: Media Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Lily Allen’s Heart Stopped At Farmer Karl’s Chanel Show
LILY Allen would like Grazia readers to know that “finally I feel beautiful”.
We join Lily as she looks at herself in a compact mirror, applies lipstick to her lips - on her face (this is no daring critique on the fashion industry) - and tells us about the moment she arrives in the Chanel barn with that Farmer Karl and his bevy of clothes horses made from actual people:
“When I came out of the hole in the stage, my heart stopped.”
Thankfully, Lily can do her routine in her coma, and neither Prince nor Rihanna, nor indeed any of the great and good that come to watch the bucolic splendour of a city farm where the cows go Miu Miu, the cats go “Mwwwwa” and the birds go “I’m a mo-del, singer actress bored of boys my own age…”
Posted: 13th, October 2009 | In: Grazia Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Brad Pitt’s Life Of Hell, Beer, Wine, Beards And Chips
IN this week’s National Enquirer, news that Angelina Jolie is “DESTROYING” Brad Pitt, Justin Timberlake’s Rihanna-Biel “LOVE TRIANGLE” and “HOW NICOLE RICHIE LOST 14LBS IN 7 DAYS.”
Brad And Angelina En France:
News is that “BRAD’S FALLING APART”. He’s “bloated” and haggard” as he endures a “life of hell” with Angelina Jolie. He’s losing his looks and it’s “crushing his spirit.”
You can see just how crushed Brad is as he tours a Syrian camp for dispossessed Iraqis on his and Angelina’s Little Donkey Tour of the Middle East.
That’s Brad Pitt with the “unkempt Colonel Sanders-style beard”, the tatty chin with bits of chicken fat, coleslaw and gristle in the creases.
That beard keeps getting longer to hide Brad’s tall stack of chins. Can the chin hair grow in step with his chins? It’s the big talking point.
Meanwhile, back at the chateau, a game of hide and seek is being enacted:
“Brad’s answer to these problems has been to hide away with a bottle of wine and some beer, which is easy for him because the chateau is enormous and he can slip to the other side of the property and stay there for days on end. He’ll find himself some French cheese and meats and grab some olives, chips and other greasy goods. Then he washes it down with bottle after bottle of expensive wine and super-strong European beer, which is his favourite.”
It is a living hell.
Justin Timberlake, Rihanna and Jessica Biel
Rihanna’s people say that Justin Timberlake must end it with Jessica Biel if he is to have any chance to dating Rihanna, who Justin is not dating but might if he drops Jessica Biel.
Only if Timberlake stops dating Biel can he even think of dating Rihanna.
And what foes for Rihanna, goes too for Kirstie Alley, Madonna, Helen Shapiro, Sarah ‘Fergie’ Ferguson and Cheryl Cole…
Perspective With Mary Jo Eustace, Dean McDermott and Tori Spelling
Mary Jo has a new book out. It’s called Divorce Sucks. In it she speaks of her ex-husband Dean McDermott and how he and Tori hooked up:
“I guess I always knew that after the years of mini bombs, one day there would be a big, fat Hiroshima.”
After that, Mary Jo gathers herself to talk of a picture she saw of Tori with her legs raised about a prone Dean. And she delivers the bombshell:
“I will never feel the same way about cowboy boots again.”
And you thought there was only one way to think about cowboy boots.
Nicole Richie Slims Down
Did you know that Nicole Richie lost 14 pounds - in weight! -after giving birth to a baby that weighed 7lbs 14oz. Add on the attachments and the water and the breast feeding and the miracle is not that Richie lost weight but that she had any weight left to lose…
Posted: 6th, October 2009 | In: Key Posts, National Enquirer Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Rihanna Raids Jodie Marsh’s Wardrobe
AFTER the fake Rihanna sex tape and the fake (?) Rihanna self-nudes, the singer steps out in an outfit that shows off her primary sexual characteristics.
If only Jodie Marsh could sing…
D-listed has more…
Oh, Rihanna, always the dirty pictures…
Posted: 1st, October 2009 | In: Celebrities Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Los Angeles Police Embroiled In Rihanna Pictures For Cash Scandal
THE LOS Angeles Police Department places two police on gardening leave, namely Rebecca Reyes and Blanca Lopez, as it probes how pictures of singer Rihanna’s Chris Brown-battered faced wound up on the TMZ website.
Anorak’s Man in LA investigates:
So who else noticed that the week the Los Angeles Police Department placed two cops on leave in its probe of how its evidence photo of the beaten pop star Rihanna wound up on the corporate gossip site TMZ.com, TMZ’s frontman Harvey Levin was in New York cruising for recruits and being feted at the Columbia School of Journalism?
Posted: 13th, September 2009 | In: Key Posts, Media Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Chris Brown Has Suspected Knuckle Concussion
CHRIS Brown, the US singer, says he does not remember beating up Rihanna, the popstar.
His brains really must be in his fists. Brown hit Rihanna so hard his brains jogged out of alignment and gave him knuckle concussion.
But it’s not Brown’s fist doing the talking this time, it’s his mouth.
On CNN’s Larry King Live, Brown explains:
“I’m in shock because first of all that’s not who I am as a person and that’s not who I pride myself on being. When I look at the police reports, I’m like ‘wow’ - I don’t know what to think. It’s crazy to me.”
Crazy to me is to wear a bowtie with a jumper. The bowtie gives the wearer the look of a man not to be taken seriously; he should be viewed as a bit suspect.
Posted: 31st, August 2009 | In: Celebrities Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
RIHANNA’S lover Chris Brown has been sent to mingle with the Celebrity Police Force for six months, and the good people at Michele Marie PR notice something about Rihanna. No, not the bruises and the discomfort but the gems:
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
Rihanna’s Court Style
LOS ANGELES - June 22, 2009 - While attending the Chris Brown preliminary hearing, Rihanna wore a vintage [redacted] yellow gold and diamond bracelet watch (Retail price, $8,500) and vintage [redacted] 18 karat yellow gold, ruby and diamond earrings (Retail price, $13,000), both from [redacted].
Gawker’s Cajun Boy spares the client any shame by redacting the press release in the manner of a House of Commons goon. Anorak wonders why she didn’t defend herself with it when Brown attacked. Wonder Woman, she ain’t.
Posted: 23rd, June 2009 | In: Celebrities Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Leighton Meester Sex Tape Uncensored
THANKS to news of an uncensored sex tape – yeah, it’s Fathers’ Day (get one for dear old dad to go with the book) – Leighton Meester, star of the TV show Gossip Girl, is famous the internet over. I
We’ve received so many sex tapes that the jaded viewer requires the actress to do something new, show some real talent. And this tape is said to feature 23-year-old Leighton in a scene “involving her very talented feet.”
Meenster’s other notable claim on fame is that she was born in a jail. Her mother was serving time in a state prison in Texas for smuggling marijuana when she gave birth. She was released 16 months later and went on to raise Leighton.
Posted: 19th, June 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
The Rihanna Sex Tape Put To Music
PSSST! We interrupt your porn viewing to bring news of a Rihanna sex tape. Having seen Rihanna topless, and skinless, celeb enthusiasts can now see the singer having sex.
No, not sex in a car. And, no, Rihanna will not be beaten up as she grunts Umbrella-ah-ah-ah-ahhhh into the neck of an insignificant other as she peels off her skin.
According to the Hollyscoop:
The clip below is only a preview, but the caption says that more of the video will be released on June 22nd, which happens to be the same day as Rihanna and Chris Brown’s court hearing. Coincidence?
Well, unlikely.
Posted: 17th, June 2009 | In: Celebrities Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
CELEBRITY victim Rihanna has worn a fur thing on her shoulders.
Posted: 15th, March 2009 | In: Celebrities Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Rihanna And Chris Brown Record Duet
RIHANNA and Chris Rown have recorded a song together.
Record Polow Da Don, tells People magazine:
“My heart goes out to both Chris and Rihanna for what has happened in the past. They are both great artists to work with, and I wish them well.”
Let’s hope it’s a, er, hit… allegedly.
Posted: 13th, March 2009 | In: Celebrities Comments (9) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
RIHANNA (red corner) and Chris Brown (round the corner, running) are married.
Says the National Enquirer:
“Rihanna & Chris: SECRET WEDDING – The troubled couple did more than just reconcile in Miami – they actually exchanged wedding vows.”
Posted: 11th, March 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts Comments (6) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Danielle Lloyd Reaches Out For Rihanna
RIHANNA is beaten up by her boyfriend, Chris Brown, allegedly, and gets new job as the spokesperson for domestic violence. She has kicked Brown to the kerb, and in the throat, and will tell all in a court of law.
It’s the Enquirer’s “RIHANNA BOMBSHELL”. Well, not quite. The big news is that Brown has taken anger management courses. His anger will be managed and very possibly get its own agent and a contract as WWWF’s The Rihannator.
Posted: 3rd, March 2009 | In: Celebrities Comments (6) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
You Chance To Beat (Up) Rihanna: Advert Fail
RIHANNA, the singer, is alleged to have been beaten up by her lover, one Chris Brown.
Can you beat her?
Posted: 26th, February 2009 | In: Celebrities, Photojournalism Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Working Towards Violence Against Women, With Rihanna
RIHANNA might fancy the change. The civil service wants:
You can beat Rihanna here…
Posted: 25th, February 2009 | In: Politicians Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Lily Allen’s New Shh Rihanna Tattoo And Mobile Library
LILY Allen has a tattoo on her finger. She is now a walking text message.
Allen’s self-labelling is good for her image, and her marketing. And is a hobby that should be encouraged by Gordon Brown, who can excuse his Government’s quotidian comment on a celebrity by saying how the sight of a young woman encouraging reading is both a fine and a noble thing.
Posted: 20th, February 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts Comments (3) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
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