Lindsay Lohan’s Kooky Hollywood Mum Dina
LINDSAY Lohan is between rehab centres. She’s been arrested. We have seen Lindsay’s father. Read about him here. Now 14 and Holy Candy take a look at the mother. It’s the Hollywood dream.
As 14 writes:
Today’s post written by one of my favorite bloggers, Candy from Holy Candy. Dina Lohan, mom-ager extraordinaire, is many things: an enabler; cleavage advocate; fame-seeker; imaginary Rockette; and, of course, white people’s answer to Oprah. But don’t you dare call her Lindsay’s mother.
Dina tells Harper’s Bazaar she’s more like a sister to Lindsay – hitting the clubs with her and wearing her hand-me-downs – and sometimes introduces herself as her daughter’s personal assistant. She even once lied about her identity to none other than George Clooney. “I don’t want them to know I’m her mom,” she said. “It’s a whole ‘nother demographic. People just go dark.”
Don’t worry, Dina! It’s our little secret.
No word on whether George took the cougar bait; however, Dina continues to take Hollywood by storm. The 44-year-old (ssshhh!) hasn’t let her daughter’s li’l DUI debacle or any semblance of maternal instincts diminish her love for the spotlight. Nope, the intermittently present mother figure has courageously forged ahead, using her daughter’s time in rehab to score tabloid interviews and some young tail. You go, girl!
In her quest for the “Mother…,” er… I mean “Big Sister of the Year” award, Dina has even found a way to make use of future meal tickets/VIP pass providers/rehab guests, Ali and Cody, a.k.a. Lindsay’s youngest siblings. (Did you really think “A Lohan Holiday” would be sufficient, Ali? I DON’T THINK SO. Momma needs a fame fix!) Yes, Dina has pitched a show to E!, a network with a known soft spot for drug-addled train wrecks.
“The cameras will follow me as I make myself, er… make my kids famous,” Dina suggested. Or something to that effect. The suits were no doubt intrigued. With any luck, the network executives likely thought, Lindsay’s two younger siblings will also self-destruct before the cameras while under the tender tutelage of their Mom-Ager. Ratings gold!
To those who question her tireless, offspring-driven search of a red carpet, Dina gives the one-finger salute. “I’m living the American dream, and [those who don’t like it] can go…” Dina told Harper’s Bazaar (before leaning back to bask in the reflected glow of her daughter’s sullied star). Mother of the Year, indeed. Medium: graphite, ink on paper, digital color. Thanks Candy.
July 24th, 2007 at 10:38 pm
This is genius! They’ve done a great job of capturing what a pathetic enabler of a mother she is. SHE should go to rehab for terrible parents.
July 24th, 2007 at 10:53 pm
Well she has seemed to be able to put her kids to work and make millions in her drug addled state….Lindsay was working Disney at like 10 years old. I wish I had some kids to pay for the life. Hmmn any takers???
July 25th, 2007 at 10:06 am
[...] For now we turn to Lohan. She has been arrested. Read about that her, and her “kooky” mum Dina here. Lohan is said to be over the alcohol limit as she drives her car in pursuit of the [...]
July 28th, 2007 at 4:20 pm
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