
Anorak Professor John Wells Explains The Nu English Idiom
A WORD now from Friend of Anorak Professor John Wells, who though not affiliated to Anorak speeks 4 mani ov us:
“Text messaging, email and internet chat rooms are showing us the way forward for English,” he said. “Let’s stop worrying if people sometimes spell ‘you’ as ‘u’, ‘your’ and ‘you’re’ both as ‘ur’, and ‘whose’ and ‘who’s’ both as ‘whos’.”
Anorak has been at the vanguard of Nu English for an age. Go on:
Posted: 9th, September 2008 | In: Anorak Says | Comments (23) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
THE new Anorak is coming. We need writers. We need designers. We need luck… In the meantime, more meetings…
Posted: 8th, September 2008 | In: Anorak Says, Photojournalism | Comments (11) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
If Vietnam Were Now What Would We See?

ON the social networks, the iconic picture of General Loan killing a Viet Con prisoner has been given the legend: “IF VIETNAM WERE NOW WHAT WOULD YOU SEE?”
The comment aims at satire, but in a world of 24-hour rolling news and the internet, what we see now is everything.
Posted: 26th, August 2008 | In: Anorak Says, Photojournalism, War On Terror | Comments (4) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Anorak Tops The Olympic Medals Table
MUCH conjecture over which country and land mass is winning the Olympics.
Old Mr Anorak would like it on the record that he alone employs women of at least 26 nationalities, which between them have amassed 121 gold medals, 103 silvers and 102 bronzes.
We have won no fewer than 15 medals per person. And this does Not include the Thai ladies ping-pong team who are boycotting the Games.
This puts Anorak at the top of any medal chart, and is yet another blow to OMA’s former wives from Slovenia, Belarus, Guatemala, Chinese Tapiei, Wales, Ecuador, Vietnam and what he resolutely refers to as Bechuanaland…
Posted: 20th, August 2008 | In: Anorak Says, Back pages | Comments (5) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
What A Kara On: Sarika Watkins-Singh Wins
SARIKA Watkins-Singh, aged 14, was reprimanded for breaking the “no jewellery” rule at Aberdare Girls’ School in South Wales. Although, in the interests of consistency, wristwatches and ear studs are permitted.
Sarika is a Sikh, and argued that her wrist bangle is central to her faith. She claimed to be the victim of unlawful discrimination. The matter went to court.
Posted: 29th, July 2008 | In: Anorak Says | Comments (7) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
How Likely Is It That A Journalist Will Die At Work?
JOURNALISTS have less chance of dying at work than truck drivers. But it depends on where you are writing, and who you’re writing about…
And how many journalists today actually do any reporting? And which is the riskier: going to a war zone to report, or living in the war zone you’re reporting on?
Posted: 28th, July 2008 | In: Anorak Says | Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Madeleine McCann: Reporting Injunction
MADDIE WATCH - Anorak’s at-a-glance guide to press coverage of Madeleine McCann
WHISPERS of an injunction:
That the UK press gets much of its insider information on the McCann case from reading “source says” in the Portuguese press is beyond doubt.
Can the UK press be barred from reporting on these reports?
Scott QC is listed leading for McCann today.
Abdullah Masry v Mona Al Khatib, High Court Family Division, Sumner J (led by Timothy Scott QC) – successful application for an injunction restraining the press generally from publishing stories about the parties and their children (contra mundum order) – application of the court’s jurisdiction in wardship;
As Anorak’s Carmen writes:
Posted: 7th, July 2008 | In: Anorak Says, Madeleine McCann | Comments (196) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Could The BBC Be Funded By Tax On Mobile And Web?
ONLINE Journalism wonders:
“Could the BBC be funded by a tax on web and mobile? In France President Sarkozy has just announced that, from next year:
“prime-time advertising on public television will be phased out, with the lost revenues to be replaced by taxes collected from internet, mobile phone and commercial broadcasting companies
“Internet and mobile operators will have to stump up a tax of 0.9 percent of sales—which could raise up to 380 million euros ($595 million), in support of the state-owned France Televisions, which controls the country’s four public channels. A further 80 million euros ($125 million) will come from taxes on commercial broadcasters.”
So would you pay for useage rather then right?
Posted: 2nd, July 2008 | In: Anorak Says, TV & Radio, Twitterings | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
How The Madeleine McCann Story Was Hijacked By Web Trolls
FROM the Anorak Forums - by AGW:
One of the most bizarre and troubling aspects of of the Madeleine McCann story has been the way the coverage of the story has itself become the story.
Anorak is not a site which has ever been (or ever will be) dedicated to the alleged crimes of abduction and subsequent claim and counter-claim of deeper, darker deeds involving in turn a resident Englishman in the Portuguese holiday complex where the McCann family had been staying and then the parents and their friends themselves.
Posted: 30th, June 2008 | In: Anorak Says, Madeleine McCann | Comments (626) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Happy Bank Holiday: We’re Off To The Beach
Posted: 23rd, May 2008 | In: Anorak Says, Strange But True | Comments (9) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Bully For Britain: An Anorak Campaign
SAYS Joe Calzaghe in the Sun: “I was bullied at school.”
Calzaghe is the undefeated middleweight champion of the world.
It might be that bullying was the making of him, just as it has been the making of some many others.
We urge the Government to back Anorak’s Bully For Britain campaign to get more children bullied and so create more British. champions…
Posted: 14th, April 2008 | In: Anorak Says, Back pages, Tabloids | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Newspapers Are About The Writer And The Web Is About The Editor
IN “Why Old Technologies Are Still Kicking”, the New York Times’ Steve Lohr looks at technical innovation and newspapers:
The demise of the old technology is confidently predicted, and indeed it may lose ground to the insurgent, as mainframes did to the personal computer. But the old technology or business often finds a sustainable, profitable life. Television, for example, was supposed to kill radio, and movies, for that matter. Cars, trucks and planes spelled the death of railways. A current death-knell forecast is that the Web will kill print media.
The web will not kill print media. We buy newspapers for the writers. London’s free newspapers have no good writing and no decent articles. Like the web they are free.
We buy newspapers for the good writing and the decent articles. Those newspapers with the least good writing and the weakest voice will no longer be needed and die out.
The web can scoop newspapers. But the best newspaper writers can put the news in context.
The web works best as an editor - a strong editorial voice linking the news of most interest to the best writing.
The new Anroak will be an online magazine and an editor for the web.
Posted: 23rd, March 2008 | In: Anorak In New York, Anorak Says, Broadsheets, Tabloids | Comments (3) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Why Shannon Matthews And Madeleine McCann Are So Different:
ANORAK reader Marie Nicholas on why Shannon Matthews and Madeleine McCann are so different:
I am pleased that little Shannon was found alive, and hope the aftermath of her story will not weigh too heavily on her future. That said, I must say I never took the same interest in her story as in the MC’s story. It made me understand what fascinates me there.
Posted: 15th, March 2008 | In: Anorak Says, Madeleine McCann | Comments (31) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
THE Book of Anorak: “Extracts from the book of Anorak, part of the Apocrypha, found amongst the
Dead Sea Scrolls.”
As told by The Anorak Forumites:
Abraham’s Sacrifice
9. And they came to a place which god had told him of; And Abraham built an
alter there, and laid the wood in order and bound Isaac his son and laid him
on the alter upon the wood
10. And Abraham stretched forth his hand and took the knife to slay his son.
11. And a voice crieth from a bush nearby saying ‘Stop, for that is child
abuse. For I am a zealous son of the tribe of Levi and we knoweth of all
things neglectful’.
12. Abraham spoke thus saying, ‘I am but doing the will of my god and it may
yet have a happy ending for such is the will of the lord’. ‘That matters
not for thou art at least guilty of child neglect’, crieth the Levite.
13. ‘Verily’ cried the voices of the multitude, for such had gathered about
the scene like a plague of flies around an ass’s’ droppings. ‘Thou art
guilty at least of child neglect and we shall report thou at the earliest
opportunity, for thou art a traveller that doth wander from place to place
without a proper job’.
14. And a voice spake unto the multitude from within, saying, ‘Let us hear
what Abraham has to say and judge him truly when the facts are full known’.
And the multitude did shout him down and pour scorn upon him. And one who
knew him said ‘ He is the son of a tax collector from a southern port and his
father doth do work for Charity’. And the scorn of the multitude was
increased even unto three or four fold thereof.
15. And the voices of the multitude did increase with cries of ‘Thou
supportest child neglect and must be stoned’ and ‘Thou art going from here
unto the place of your abode in an ambulance’ and ‘Where dost thou live? Art thou
married? And what art thou wearing tonight?’ For yea! There were women present
within the multitude.
16. And the lord looked down and saw what had become of his creation and he
was not pleased and did summon unto him his archangel and saith unto him.
‘Go forth and sort this out in the name of my unborn son, for it is becoming
as a carbuncle upon my nether regions’.
17. Thus, the angel of the lord did descend upon the multitude and did smite them mightily both left and right scattering the multitude before his wrath. And it came to
pass that the Levite and the Son of the tax collector were driven hence for
a time unto the wilderness and peace did descend upon the land.
18. And the multitude did bleat and wander for they were a shepherdless flock and did
return to grazing and swapping of recipes and lusting after each other and
the child of Abraham was forgot for a time.
19. Came the next day’s dawn and a great shout was heard amongst the multitude
‘New Thread! New Thread! and the multitude did depart this place for another.
There are many other scrolls in the collection relating to the Story of
Abraham as laid out in the book of Anorak but they all appear to be very
much the same.
Posted: 14th, March 2008 | In: Anorak Says, Twitterings | Comments (7) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
The Shitty View Through The Microsoft Vista Window
MICROSOFT VISTA: “One year after the birth of Windows Vista, why do so many Windows XP users still decline to ‘upgrade’? . . . XP users have heard too many chilling stories from relatives and friends about Vista upgrades that have gone badly. The graphics chip that couldn’t handle Vista’s whizzy special effects. The long delays as it loaded. The applications that ran at slower speeds. The printers, scanners and other hardware peripherals, which work dandily with XP, that lacked the necessary software, the drivers, to work well with Vista.”
Vista has been nothing but a pain is the neck from day one. The vista through the Microsoft window is of a puile of steaming dog poo…
Posted: 10th, March 2008 | In: Anorak Says, Twitterings | Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
David Rees And The Death Of The Exclamation Mark
DAVID Rees has a question: “What’s the maximum number of exclamation points you can post to your blog in one day?”
In Fleet Street the exclamation mark was known as “The Screamer!” It now lacks any power. Overused! And undervalued! LOL!!
The blog exclamation mark is the grammatical emoticon, those symbols that reveal the writer to be the sort of person who quotes scenes from films, eats their own bogies and has a Crazy Frog ringtone (and not just as one Anorak writer reserves for his wife).
Says Rees:
Between this and this and this, blogging could get insane this weekend. So I’m stockpiling exclamation points now.
[! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !
! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !
! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !
! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !
! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !]I’d advise other bloggers to do the same, before the government makes it a crime to hoard punctuation marks.
The exclamation mark is used in place of humour (!), to alert the reader to the news that Pete! and Joan!!! are coming for dinner!!!! and they are bringing a lemon cake!!!!!
The effect is to dull the already duller than dull. The one useful purpose of the exclamation mark is to alert the reader to the fact that the person exclaiming is a pillock.
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Paul Sorene
Posted: 8th, March 2008 | In: Anorak Says, Beyond Parody | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
They Always Want the Writer To Work For Nothing
They Always Want the Writer To Work For Nothing - I’m thinking of having this tattooed on my tongue…
Shall we whoop or cry?
Posted: 7th, March 2008 | In: Anorak Says, Money | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
THE Anroak - it’s in fashion:
Now it’s the turn of the humble anorak. Once regarded as the ghastly “uniform” of the terminally unstylish, it has long been considered totally beyond redemption. Kate Moss might have made green wellies look the ultimate in Glastonbury cool, but even she gave the anorak the cold shoulder.
This spring, however, the anorak has been grasped by its collar and rejigged as a new, lightweight, trans-seasonal cover-up.
The hour is upon us!
Posted: 8th, February 2008 | In: Anorak Says, Twitterings | Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Paul Sorene For Hire: Anorak Investors Needed
The Anorak is edited and written by Paul Sorene. Hire me. Invest in Anorak and help make it the top curent affairs magazine on the net.
Dennis publishing just bought the First Post for lots of money - the site employs 13 staff. And it’s average and forgettable.
Anorak gets 400,000 unique visitors a month.
With investment we could be great…
Contact Tel: (UK) 07980 578831; psorene [at] anorak [dot] co [dot] uk
Posted: 8th, February 2008 | In: Anorak Says | Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Bloggerheads, Guido And Permission
POLDRAW writes of a row on Tim Ireland’s Bloggerheads, between himself and the Conservative blogger Guido Fawkes, “over the latter’s repeated theft of artists material alleged tendency to use material without permission.”
The latest run-in comes after Matt ‘Hack’ Buck, followed by Beau Bo D’or, revealed that Guido had been using cartoons they produced for Channel 4 online, on his site. Guido seems adamant that he has some sort of permission from Channel 4, although no concrete proof has been shown to prove that.
As Poldraw notes: “If Guido doesn’t have permission he should be forced to pay a fee.
If he does, Channel 4 must pay the cartoonists and apologise profusely - provided of course there’s not a contract stating that they own the full rights. Tim Ireland is currently trying to contact Channel 4.”
Anorak has worked with Beau Bo D’Or and know him to be professional and excellent. Hack and Poldraw allow Anorak to use their pictures because we asked before using them. We have also worked with Tim, and paid him an agreed fee for his services.
We have no wish to comment on the matter, but should say that with email and communication so simple, why don’t people just ask?
Posted: 3rd, February 2008 | In: Anorak Says | Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0




