Splash News on Michael Jackson’s death - “It’s like the FA Cup final”

Those Euro 2008 News Updates In Full
IT promises to be a footy-tastic summer for Britishers on the sofas and playas as they break off a game against the Waiters XI and cheer on the Germans.
The BBC TV trail for the big summer of football wonders what team you’ll be pumping for. As a guide, the Beeb’s Richard Bacon is gunning for Greece because he likes feta cheese and the Greek’s zero-tolerance policy on drugs.
BBC Five Live voice Shelagh Fogarty opts for Spain because she’s been there and as Sylvia Vrethammar’s No.1 fan knows all the words to Y Viva Espana (”I’d like to shag a matador”) ; and Simon Mayo is rooting and a tootin’ for the Dutch because they are - get this - “very entertaining people”, for whom the cheap drugs and rented sex are just the warm-up acts.
Over in Germany, no such creativity at play - just football. As the country’s Bild newspaper announces: “We will play football without you this summer.”
For our part, Anorak will be cheering on a female dog handler and an introverted choirboy in an oversized suit, working out if Claire from The Apprentice can form a decent middle-management combo with Frank Lampard, and waiting for soaked-to-the-bone break-dancer George Scissorhands to impress a brolly holding Steve McLaren in an advert for health insurance…
Posted: 3rd, June 2008 | In: Back pages, TV & Radio Comments (4) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink
Comments





June 4th, 2008 at 12:42 pm
…go Denmark…
June 4th, 2008 at 12:36 pm
My Uncle Hans was an SS officer in the invasion of Czechoslovakia - but I’m sure he wouldn’t have approved of Steve McLaren’s brolly.
June 3rd, 2008 at 7:04 pm
My wife’s grandpa killed an SS officer in the invasion of Czechoslovakia - so can I have two teams?
June 3rd, 2008 at 3:54 pm
I once knew a girl called Marie from Romania, so they get my vote.