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Breaking Media, Politicians & Celebrities Since 1995Tabloid news for broadsheet readers |
British and American celebrities making the news and in the newspapers
HOW the media works: Find the celebrity. Ask the celebrity who they’re supporting in the presidential election.
Which presidential election? Not important. Any election will do. Bai Ling says “Vote for me”. She will “How you say, demolish all the counties”. Not only how you say, but how Stalin and Hitler say, too.
No countries. Just a little piece. She’d kill us all…
SAYS Barack Obama and foreskin-faced groupie Oprah Winfrey:
I agree that Sarah Palin would be a fantastic interview, and I would love to have her on after the campaign is over.
Why would the vice president want to talk with Oprah, other than to gloat?
SAYS Vicky Jones of her husband Colin: “He can’t abide Westlife but he doesn’t say a lot.” Maybe he doesn’t know who to talk to when he’s approaching from the rear.
On a brighter note, at least Brian McPadding had the decency to leave the and and spare Colin more pain. Unless, he’s hiding somewhere else…
IF you have a celebrity cocaine story, call the Daily’s Mirror’s news desk and Stephen Moyes will respond in faster than a speeding popstar.
There’s the phone now. The man on the blower says he’s got a scoop on a celeb smoking crack cocaine.
SAYS Jennifer Lopez, aka Jenny Who Owns The Block, of life with her husband Marc Anthony:
“I said, ‘I did the superwoman thing, I finished the tour – now I need you to take care of me. I love doing things for you; if I’m not cooking, then I’m picking out a shirt. But this is the first time in my life where I’m just going to be a little bit selfish.” - Elle
The help must be in awe…
AMY Winehouse is beating the credit Crunch by buying 48 bottles of Jack Daniels whiskey.
The Sun says organisers of the Bestival were “Stunned” that Amy ordered two cases of the beverage.
Bestival is, we learn, staged on the Isle of White, and the fear is surely that with oil prices surging, the ferry company or airline transporting Winehouse will go bust and Amy will be trapped forever on the rock.
The Sun solicits “a source” to say: “Whiskey is better than heroin – but not 48 bottles of the stuff.”
Indeed, Old Mr Anorak assures us that heroin beats whiskey hands down. Given the option of 48 bottles of imported booze or a bag of good quality British smack, Sun readers can now make more informed choice.
AMY Winehouse is beating the credit Crunch by buying 48 bottles of Jack Daniels whiskey.
The Sun says organisers of the Bestival were “Stunned” that Amy ordered two cases of the beverage.
Bestival is, we learn, staged on the Isle of White, and the fear is surely that with oil prices surging, the ferry company or airline transporting Winehouse will go bust and Amy will be trapped forever on the rock.
The Sun solicits “a source” to say: “Whiskey is better than heroin – but not 48 bottles of the stuff.”
Indeed, Old Mr Anorak assures us that heroin beats whiskey hands down. Given the option of 48 bottles of imported booze or a bag of good quality British smack, Sun readers can now make more informed choice.
SAYS Sienna Miller’s mum, of the actress who has had the world “SLUT” sprayed on the outside of her London home (Sienna’s moving to LA to escape British scum - we know who we are):
“It’s disgusting that she can not live in her own country. Now she’s going to have to leave the country to get on with life. She can’t live here now. Why is it that if a man leaves his wife the new woman gets all the shit? That doesn’t happen the other way round.”
Spray paint your answers to the usual address… And note to mum: it does...
SAYS Sienna Miller’s mum, of the actress who has had the world “SLUT” sprayed on the outside of her London home (Sienna’s moving to LA to escape British scum - we know who we are):
“It’s disgusting that she can not live in her own country. Now she’s going to have to leave the country to get on with life. She can’t live here now. Why is it that if a man leaves his wife the new woman gets all the shit? That doesn’t happen the other way round.”
Spray paint your answers to the usual address… And note to mum: it does...
Lily ALLEN is at the GQ magazine Men Of The Year Awards:
“Co-host Lily struggled with her glamorous gown as she arrived to present the GQ Men ot the Year Awards”
- Daily Star
LILY Allen News Of The Day. More tomorrow…
Lily ALLEN is at the GQ magazine Men Of The Year Awards:
“Co-host Lily struggled with her glamorous gown as she arrived to present the GQ Men ot the Year Awards”
- Daily Star
LILY Allen News Of The Day. More tomorrow…
BILLIE Piper is in conversation with the Sun’s Emma Cox. Ooer…
“It’s nice having boobs. I think when you don’t have them you find ways to make yourself feel better about the lack of cleavage…
“Then they’re there and you’re like, ‘How am I ever going to live without these?’. That’s my next problem. You love them so much and you really want to get them out a lot and just expose yourself to anyone who wants to see them…
“Should you go around showing what you’ve got, or keep it under wraps because you’re about to become a mum? It’s a dilemma — but I just tend to get them out.”
What to do..? What to do..?
CELEBRITY Quote of the Day: Nicholas Cage Exercises His Ghosts
Cage has a mansion in New Orleans - “It’s allegedly the most severely haunted house in the United States of America… that’s what they tell me. So at any given moment, I have five or six ghosts surrounding the house, all looking up at this haunted temple.”
So can any hack of ghost hunter spend the night there?
“I won’t let them in - because of respect. If there’s something in there, I don’t want them being exploited”
Says Cage in the, er, press…
SARAH Palin Watch: Anorak’s look at Sarah Palin in the news…
SAYS Alabama’s Martha Stokes:
“It was a touchdown, grand slam home run, a three-point shot and whatever you do in soccer.”
David Beckham’s mission to bring soccerball to the Americans is a work in progress…
SARAH Palin Watch: Anorak’s look at Sarah Palin in the news…
SAYS Alabama’s Martha Stokes:
“It was a touchdown, grand slam home run, a three-point shot and whatever you do in soccer.”
David Beckham’s mission to bring soccerball to the Americans is a work in progress…
“I FEAR MY CANCER’S SPREAD,” says the Jade Goody-inspired headline on the Mirror’s cover.
This is not a metaphorical tabloid cancer, and right now millions of youths are not racially abusing Asians for our entertainment. This is real cancer. This is Jade Goody’s celebrity cancer.
News is that doctors have warned Goody that she “could have less than 10 years to live”.
Ten years..?
“I FEAR MY CANCER’S SPREAD,” says the Jade Goody-inspired headline on the Mirror’s cover.
This is not a metaphorical tabloid cancer, and right now millions of youths are not racially abusing Asians for our entertainment. This is real cancer. This is Jade Goody’s celebrity cancer.
News is that doctors have warned Goody that she “could have less than 10 years to live”.
Ten years..?
ULRIKA Jonsson, she of the time-share body, is talking about, and on behalf of, her breasts on GMTV:
“So while all other women are having breast augmentations, I’m having corrective surgery.”
It’s the book of celebrity euphemisms. Ulrika’s breasts are tired and emotional…
PARIS HiIton tells the media that she has had it up to there with media intrusion. That P.A. R..:
“It is annoying when they are always showing up at your house. I think it is fine at like a movie premiere or an event when they are supposed to be there. But when it is every single day it just gets really tiring.
“There is nothing you can do about it. They want you to lash out at them so I never do. I have never done that and I never will.”
“..I..S…H….
Picture: 14
PARIS HiIton tells the media that she has had it up to there with media intrusion. That P.A. R..:
“It is annoying when they are always showing up at your house. I think it is fine at like a movie premiere or an event when they are supposed to be there. But when it is every single day it just gets really tiring.
“There is nothing you can do about it. They want you to lash out at them so I never do. I have never done that and I never will.”
“..I..S…H….
Picture: 14
WHO is David Beckham talking about as he writes in the Mirror:
David Beckham Soccer Aid exclusive: You can help us tackle hunger
Who is us?