TIME again to look inside Kate Moss’s fridge.
As we cry: “What’s in your fridge, Kate?”
Today the Mirror’s 3am Girls open the freidge door and tell us that Kate is mostly drinking water and (bottled) and soft drinks.
More tomorrow…
Posted: 14th, October 2008 | In: Celebrities, Kate Moss and Pete Doherty | Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Pete Doherty’s YouTube Tribute To Kate Moss
PASS the Wet Ones…
Posted: 2nd, October 2008 | In: Celebrities, Kate Moss and Pete Doherty, Terrible TV, Twitterings | Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Kate Moss Is To Blame For Everything
WANT to know who to blame for the credit cruch, child murder, rape and your sad, flabby life? Fergus Shanahan knows. There might be British day party. Let’s blame Kate Moss:
“Cokehead model Kate Moss is suggested by Labour as a celebrity with the right values to lead the partying. Of course she is. Why not ask the Yorkshire Ripper along as well? With Rose West to do the teas.”
Kate Moss. She bad…
Posted: 16th, September 2008 | In: Celebrities, Kate Moss and Pete Doherty, Tabloids | Comments (4) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Kate Moss Snorts Cars And Brings Down World Financial Markets
KATE Moss snorts petrol fumes, says the Star. Says Kate Moss:
“I’ve heard it’s one of the most preferred scents in the world – maybe that’s something to study for my next fragrance.”
Moss, as chance has it, has launched her new fragrance, a celebrity vehicle with top notes of Cortina backseat and extracts of mini cab. It’s called Velvet Hour.
And Cocaine Moss’s car news does not end there. No way.
The Mirror says Kate Moss car has been broken into and she fears a £200k ring has been stolen from it. For shame!
Posted: 16th, September 2008 | In: Celebrities, Kate Moss and Pete Doherty, Tabloids | Comments (5) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Anthrax Alice Dellal Is the New Cocaine Kate
OVERLOOKING the story “MODEL IN ‘I DID NOT TAKE COCAINE’” shocker, the Sun leads with a picture of one Alice Dellal “sprawled over what appears to be a thick line of cocaine.”
Of course, the woman dubbed the “new Kate Moss” by the paper is not all that fat, a condition that may make the line of powders white (anthrax?) appear fatter than if it were sat before someone, well, fatter.
To put the tin lid on the drugs and celebrity angle, Dellal is said to be a “pal” of one Peaches Geldof, a desperado not seen since the days of Sancho Panza.
Posted: 10th, September 2008 | In: Celebrities, Kate Moss and Pete Doherty, Tabloids | Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Pete Doherty’s One Hand Clapped In Austria
PETE Doherty is in Bettina Aichbauer’s farmhouse in Austria.
No, no, Doherty has not gone missing, and there is no strange smell wafting up from the cellar.
But there is a smell.
Posted: 2nd, September 2008 | In: Celebrities, Kate Moss and Pete Doherty, Tabloids | Comments (3) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Smoking Graz: Pete Doherty’s Home Movies In Austria
OVER the news wires, Anorak learns that “troubled” singer Pete Doherty is to show “an unseen homemade movie about his life in an Austrian cinema”.
Doherty’s trouble seem to be that narcotics are illegal and addictive. Other than that he seems to be doing just fine making a living from getting off his face and singing half-finished Donovan songs.
And what of Austria, a fine place to show your home movies, perhaps on a cellar wall in the company of the good old boys, who might want to share some footage of their youth in Salzburg, Berlin, Warsaw and Greece.
Posted: 27th, August 2008 | In: Celebrities, Kate Moss and Pete Doherty | Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
CPF Bans Pete Doherty’s Whirlpool Effect
MORE news from the Celebrity Police Force which has issued a statement that reads:
“The issue is not the act itself, it is the profile of fans that follow the act. Wiltshire police do not have an issue with Pete Doherty or Babyshambles.”
Posted: 20th, August 2008 | In: Broadsheets, Celebrities, Kate Moss and Pete Doherty | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Britain Gears Up For 2012 Drugs Olympics
WE’RE “OUT OF OUR HEADS,” screams the Sun.
“Drugs epidemic wrecking Britain.” For Sun readers that’s “broken Britain”, being wrecked, or mashed, as we know it to be. “DRUGS BRITAIN,” advertises the Indy.
The bombshell figures — which reveal 2million adults have taken drugs in the last month — will fuel calls for a crackdown on celebrity drug users like Amy Winehouse and Pete Doherty.
Before Winehouse and Doherty appeared, drugs were an Americanism for pharmaceuticals. Says the Sun: “More than 400 under-16s were admitted last year, compared with 272 in 1997.”
In 1997, Anorak can reveal that the country’s top stars were, in order, Timmy Mallett, Steps and Ally McBeal. Innocent days, indeed.
Posted: 15th, August 2008 | In: Amy Winehouse, Back pages, Broadsheets, Celebrities, Kate Moss and Pete Doherty, Tabloids | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Celebrity Quote Of The Day: Pete Doherty’s Hit
CELEBRITY Quote Of The Day: Pete Doherty’s Hit.
“When you split up with someone you’re seriously in love with, it takes a lot of time before you even realise you’re upset. You know it just hits you?” - The Sun
Peter Doehty takes a hit.
Posted: 31st, July 2008 | In: Celebrities, Kate Moss and Pete Doherty, Tabloids | Comments (4) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
PETE Doherty’s Court Out tour continues to get great press.
And the Sun brings news that Pete has added an exciting new twist to his act.
In “Burgling Doherty burgled”, the Sun says that Doherty’s home has been broken into and thieves have made off with a guitar and some of his paintings.
Posted: 21st, July 2008 | In: Celebrities, Kate Moss and Pete Doherty, Tabloids | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Pete Doherty’s Court Out Tour 2008
PETE Dohertys summer tour 2008 is underway.
The Court Out tour was due to take in a courtroom in Yeovil, Somerset, but Doherty kept the fans waiting and ultimately did not show up.
But not to worry, fans. The Sun says the promoter, one Justice of the Peace, has issued a warrant for Dohertys arrest and he WILL be in court soon.
See press for further details
Posted: 18th, July 2008 | In: Celebrities, Kate Moss and Pete Doherty, Tabloids | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Pete Dohety Has Turned Into Sting
THE smack; the teen agnst; the spots - we cn take. But another Sting is too, too much to strand…
Posted: 30th, June 2008 | In: Celebrities, Kate Moss and Pete Doherty, Terrible TV, Twitterings | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Celebrity News Of The Day: Pete Doherty’s Petrol Crisis
THE petrol cisris is gripping Britain.
“PETROL CRISIS GETS EVEN WORSE,” says the Express on its front apge. This is the crisisiest petrol crisis ever.
Just how bad it is is can be found in the Star where news is that Pete Doherty can’t afford to fill up his car.
Says Doherty, by way of a speech bubble: “It’s cheaper to buy smack.”
You’re on, Pete. Crisis, what crisizzzzzzzzzzzz
Posted: 17th, June 2008 | In: Celebrities, Kate Moss and Pete Doherty, Money, Tabloids | Comments (8) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Stephen Moyes’ Tabloid Lines Worth More Than Cocaine
MORE news of Mirror hack Stephen Moyes who was, allegedly, told by one Anthony Kelly (who has admitted to a charge of perverting the course of justice) that Amy Winehouse would stump up any cash for her husband’s plot.
Moyes has quite a record. It was Moyes who “exposed Kate Moss’s cocaine shame” (surely talc? – Ed) and soap actor Craig Charles smoking crack in the back of a taxi.
Moyes is now the man who has exposed an, alleged, plot to pay a beaten-up barman £200,000.
James King, the stricken pub worker, may yet profit from Moyes’ story. After the Moss Talc shocker, the model went on to reap an estimated seven-figure increase in earnings.
And now the Mirror reports that Craig Charles is writing a kiss ‘n’ “hell” autobiography.
(Picture: Beau Bo D’Or Website)
Without news of his drug taking what odds on anyone caring to read the story of a jobbing actor and voiceover man?
Moyes has the Midas touch, his words being worth more per line to a celebrity than cocaine…
Posted: 11th, June 2008 | In: Amy Winehouse, Celebrities, Kate Moss and Pete Doherty, Tabloids | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Amy Winehouse In White House Plot
THE full shocker goes: “Amy Winehouse’s jealous husband offered a hardmarn £20,000 to have Pete Doherty ‘smashed to pieces’.”
Getting smashed is what Doherty does best, it being the root of his tabloid fame. Chances are he would have extended a veiny limb and accepted Blake Fielder Civil’s offer with relish.
But the Sun says this smashing was to occur not with pipe and syringe, rather by way of fist and claw.
Richard Lyttle, an ex-bouncer (do you ever really leave the job?) tells one and all: “We were sitting in my cell and he said: ‘If you get Doherty for me I’ll give you £20,000.’ He kept saying ‘Can you arrange it?’ and telling me to get some guys to his house.”
No other word nor proof is offered, and whether Doherty is smashed or not, we leave for you to work out.
But back to the £20,000? If it’s the going rate for smashing someone’s face in, it might also be the rate for perverting the course of justice.
Posted: 11th, June 2008 | In: Amy Winehouse, Celebrities, Kate Moss and Pete Doherty, Tabloids | Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Beyond Parody: Camilla Long Invents Davinia Taylor
“KATE MOSS, SADIE, SIENNA And ME,” trails the front page of the Sunday Times.
The headline “ME” is a Sunday Times everyman, a nominal person who will place the three women in context and add historical perspective. She’s given the unlikely name Davinia Taylor, a moniker that blends the deliberately extraordinary with the plebeian
“Davinia Taylor: Secrets of the Primrose Hill set,” says the paper, in what proves to be skilful parody on modern life, and newspaper reporting.
“Davinia Taylor is at the heart of the group, which includes Sadie Frost and Kate Moss. She has never spoken, until now.”
A mute celebrity friend is surely what they all crave. No kiss and tells with a dumb person. But now Davinia is given a voice.
Davinia Taylor is in her downstairs loo. “That’s Kate and me just after we left Disneyland,” she says, pointing out photos. “And there she is in the country, washing the car with Lila. Oh, look, the Duch!” - the Duchess of York, on a night out with Princess Eugenie. Here is Davinia with her new baby, the now 11-month-old Grey, and her husband, David Gardner, the footballer turned agent and David Beckham’s best friend.
Were this not a clear parody, it would be beyond parody, and Anorak would hang up its coat and retire.
Then a snap of Jake Chapman’s daughter in a highchair, the word ‘F***’ artistically picked out in raisins in front of her. “She didn’t do that herself, obviously.”
Posted: 8th, June 2008 | In: Beyond Parody, Broadsheets, Celebrities, Kate Moss and Pete Doherty | Comments (3) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Amy Winehouse Named In Camden Town Murder Story
TO Camden Town, North London, where Sharmaarke Hassan, a 17-year-old member of the entrepreneurial, if a little materialistic, Money Squad has been killed.
Lest readers think the murder of a teenaged Somalian immigrant not worthy of investigation, the Times lets us know: “The area’s pubs and clubs are frequented by a group of celebrities that includes Amy Winehouse, Pete Doherty, Peaches Geldof and Daisy Lowe.”
Summon the celebrity police squad and haul in the usual suspects. Hassan did not die in vain.
The Times does not rest on its laurels but digs even deeper to discover that a blog about gang wars in Camden (unnamed and not linked to from the paper’s website) “attracted a series of comments claiming that Somali gangs were ‘running’ the borough”.
A walk through the bad streets of the Internet finds tags for the North London Somalis, the Camden Boys, African Nations Crew and the Centric Boyz but no sign of any of them on the streets. Like elected councilors, they are never there when you need them most.
Posted: 30th, May 2008 | In: Amy Winehouse, Celebrities, Kate Moss and Pete Doherty | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Pete Doherty’s Hard Shoulder Story: Dead Cat Buried
CELEBRITY Quote Of The Day: Pete Doherty.
Says Pete Doherty, on stage in Brixton:
“Sorry I’m late. But considering I’ve had to bury one of my cats by the roadside I’ve done pretty well to be here at all.”
More Doherty news tomorrow…
Posted: 29th, May 2008 | In: Celebrities, Kate Moss and Pete Doherty | Comments (5) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Amy Winehouse And Peter Doherty Doing Mice Tampons
AMY Winehouse and Pete Doherty are doing mice. It’s self-conscious, self-aware, self-promotion. It’s a pop music video without the music:
Posted: 17th, May 2008 | In: Amy Winehouse, Celebrities, Kate Moss and Pete Doherty, Terrible TV | Comments (4) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
- Lauren on X Factor: Jedward, John & Edward, Are Voted Out, But Then
- Anorak on X Factor: Jedward, John & Edward, Are Voted Out, But Then
- Ava on X Factor: Jedward, John & Edward, Are Voted Out, But Then
- Madeleine on X Factor: Jedward, John & Edward, Are Voted Out, But Then
- Lydia on X Factor Live Blog: Olly Murs Marries And Danyl Johnson Does Prince Over
