Paris Hilton For President, Sings Paris Hilton
MOVE over Northern Exposure. This is Indecent Exposure **cking the vote:
Posted: 28th, October 2008 | In: Celebrities, Paris Hilton, Terrible TV | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Sarah Palin Watch: Paris Hilton’s Moose In Lipstick
SARAH Palin Watch: Anorak’s look at Sarah Palin in the British media…
BRIAN READE (Mirror): One of Reade’s “Big Questions”
“SARAH PALIN admitting she still gets up at 3am to hunt moose. If she fails to make vice-president, will she do a showbiz column with Paris Hilton and Kelly Osbourne called the 3am Moose.”
Back Obama can use that joke against women’s looks, if he likes…
Posted: 11th, September 2008 | In: Barack Obama, Celebrities, Paris Hilton, Politicians, Race For The White House, Sarah Palin, Tabloids | Comments (10) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Celebrity Quote Of The Day: Paris Hilton Bemoans Media Intrusion
PARIS HiIton tells the media that she has had it up to there with media intrusion. That P.A. R..:
“It is annoying when they are always showing up at your house. I think it is fine at like a movie premiere or an event when they are supposed to be there. But when it is every single day it just gets really tiring.
“There is nothing you can do about it. They want you to lash out at them so I never do. I have never done that and I never will.”
“..I..S…H….
Picture: 14
Posted: 3rd, September 2008 | In: Celebrities, Paris Hilton | Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Tabloid Sensation: Paris Hilton Wears Shoes
PARIS Hilton news, by Gordon Smart:
“The heiress rarely goes out without donning a pair of killer stillettos - even for a trip to the supermarket it seems” – The Sun
More tabloid news tomorrow…
Posted: 27th, August 2008 | In: Celebrities, Paris Hilton, Tabloids | Comments (5) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
PARIS Hilton’s bikini saves energy:
Paris Hilton might not be as big a celebrity as Barack Obama, but she obviously has a better energy plan - McCain spokesman Tucker Bounds.
argumentum ad fortiori, the argument from strength. From the Latin, meaning “argument from strength.”
Writes Jay:
New Paris Hilton video on Funny or Die! Responding to a McCain ad that likens Obama to celebrities like the airhead heiress, Paris appears in a leopard-spotted swimsuit. “I want America to know that I’m, like, totally ready to lead,” she says, announcing her candidacy to become president a mere eight years before the U.S. Constitution allows.
She does a nice mashup of her rivals’ energy policies: “We can do limited offshore drilling with strict environmental oversight while creating tax incentives to get Detroit making hybrid and electric cars,” she says.
The McCain campaign volleys back with a very nice argumentum ad fortiori. If something more-so is true, then it’s likely that something less-so will be true as well. Or vice versa. If Paris’s energy policy trumps Barack’s, then we all had better move to Jedda.
Snappy Answer: Plus, she’d be the only president to make energy policy seem dirty.
Posted: 13th, August 2008 | In: Celebrities, John McCain, Paris Hilton, Politicians, Race For The White House, Twitterings | Comments (4) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
RUSSIAN teenager Anna Ivanov has had plastic surgery to look just like Paris Hilton.
As the Mirror reports, she told surgeon Zurab Meladze: “They already call me Paris Hilton. So now I want to be her. Everything. Lips, breasts and all the rest.”
Posted: 11th, August 2008 | In: Celebrities, John McCain, Paris Hilton, Politicians, Race For The White House | Comments (3) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
PARIS Hilton for President:
Posted: 6th, August 2008 | In: Celebrities, Paris Hilton, Terrible TV, Twitterings | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Why Presidential Candidate Paris Hilton Should Not Endorse Obama
JOHN McCain shows a campaign video of Barack Obama and two blonde girls: Paris Hilton and Britney Spears.
Is this dog whistle politics about the black man coming for the white woman? Maybe. More likely it’s just McCain trying to be associated with people more famous than he is.
McCain is 71. Obama turns 47 today. When McCain was 47 the top celebrities – or VIPs as they were then knows – were Dave Kid Jensen, Vanessa Williams and My Little Pony.
Anyhow, Kathy Hilton, Paris’s mum, is upset. So she does what any upset Hollywood mum does and writes an article about just how upset she is and puts it online. Says she:
Posted: 3rd, August 2008 | In: Barack Obama, Britney Spears, Celebrities, John McCain, Paris Hilton, Politicians, Race For The White House | Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Barack Obama Is Britney Spears Is Paris Hilton
IF Barack Obama is a celebrity, is he Britney Spears? Is he Paris Hilton?
Does he wear underwear? Does he wear underwear inside - or outside - his trousers?
And if John McCain is a celebrity, which one is he?
Posted: 30th, July 2008 | In: Barack Obama, Britney Spears, Celebrities, John McCain, Paris Hilton, Politicians, Race For The White House, Terrible TV | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Paris Hilton Bids For Cristiano Ronaldo
MORE Cristiano Ronaldo transfer news as the Manchester United footballer fends off a late approach from Los Angles scout Paris Hilton.
Posted: 17th, July 2008 | In: Back pages, Celebrities, Paris Hilton, Tabloids, Wags & Players | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Celebrity Fact Of The Day: Paris Hilton’s Man O’ War
THE Daily Star reports:
Paris Hitlon has become addicted to jelly fish.
Fact!
Posted: 18th, June 2008 | In: Celebrities, Paris Hilton, Tabloids | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Paris Hilton: Everyone Should Have a Chance To Be Me
PARIS Hilton: “Everyone Should Have a Chance To Be Me”
It’s the tag line of her new hair extensions vehicle.
Spotter: bellasugar
Posted: 18th, June 2008 | In: Celebrities, Paris Hilton, Twitterings | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Madeleine McCann: No Portugal Return, Maddy TV And Paris Hilton
MADDIE WATCH - Anorak’s at-a-glance guide to press coverage of Madeleine McCann
It’s the Mirror’s “MADELEINE EXCLUSIVE”. The news is – as Anorak reported last night – that the Tapas Seven (surely the Sangria 7? –Ed) will not be returning to Portugal to take part in a reconstruction of the night Madeleine went missing.
A source says: “They were asked informally to return, then asked again in an official letter last week. After some consideration they decided not to go back. They were concerned it would not be televised, and were bemused as to why it was happening so long after Madeleine disappeared.”
And who would play Madeleine? Her? Her? What about “Look Into My Eyes”, a TV talent show search for a Madeleine fronted by Trevor McDonald and GMTV?
Remember Kelsey: “Mummy, I could play Madeleine. I look just like her’”?
THE SUN: “No re-run for Maddie cops”
What does Lorraine Kelly think? It was she who said:
How could someone put their infant child forward as a Madeleine lookalike with the idea of making money? The child obviously has to be around the same age as Madeleine.
Posted: 28th, May 2008 | In: Celebrities, Madeleine McCann, Paris Hilton, Tabloids | Comments (500) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Kathy Hilton Walks in Paris’s Shoes
KATHY Hilton, mother to straight-to-tissues internet film star Paris Hilton is in conversation with the Mail.
“People say: ‘Oh she’s spoilt, she’s this, she’s that.’ But, until you’ve walked in someone’s shoes for many miles, don’t make a judgment call.”
Happily Paris Hilton has a range of shoes on the market, and we who have walked in them found the pink stilettos to be almost impossible to do anything in other than wince and wave, and gave up on the leopard print heels after just a few yards.
Next year, Old Mr Anorak plans to run the London Marathon is Paris’s silver open-toe mules and for added empathy wear a prison-issue pair of grey knickers and bra.
Kathy looks up. “And Paris’s jail suit”, says she, now “close to tears, “I found it when she was released. When I felt how rough it was - that thing was like sandpaper - I threw it away.”
Old Mr Anorak has tears in his eyes. And we advise him to take advantage of Kathy Hilton’s new range of waterproof beauty products and sports gels…
Picture: Mandela & 14
Posted: 23rd, May 2008 | In: Celebrities, Paris Hilton, Tabloids | Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Paris Hilton Looks For Princess Diana’s Wedding Venue
PARIS Hilton might pass for American Royalty, but can she be the new Princess Diana?
What irony that the new Diana should be named after the scene of Di’s departure from public life. There is some hope, then, that Paris can be Diana.
Paris is tall. Paris is blonde. Paris has a lob-sided look that garners sympathy. Paris has been to hell and back.
Says Queen Helen Mirren: “I don’t applaud Paris Hilton… but I think she’s pretty cool. She’s developed, like Princess Diana, that deliberate foolishness, which is disarming.”
The Star investigates if the brand can be developed, looking on as Paris scours London for a venue for her wedding to pop star Benji Madden.
Posted: 19th, May 2008 | In: Celebrities, Paris Hilton, Tabloids | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Victoria Beckham Is Zero And Paris Hilton Is Given One
PARIS Hilton and Victoria Beckham are in London.
The Mail sees Hilton setting up her stall on Oxford Street, on which she will sell her innate smell, Can-Can, a heady blend of used tissue, warm mattress and tinned crab.
Over in Harrods, Victoria Beckham is flogging denim. “I often look incredibly rough, actually,” says Posh on GMTV, a confession she may consider a revelation, and others a tagline for her fashion range.
The Star sees the two woman doing battle. Oxford Street is “mobbed”. The traffic is at a “standstill”. Paris is selling 150 bottle of perfume.
Posted: 16th, May 2008 | In: Celebrities, Money, Paris Hilton, Posh and Becks, Tabloids | Comments (18) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Paris Hilton Has No Monopoly On Boardom
PARIS Hilton says of her life with boyfriend Benji Madden: “We don’t really like to go out. We have game night where friends come over and play Monopoly.”
She concludes: “He has changed my life in every way.”
Some may see little change in a woman famously in line to inherit a property empire playing a game in which she tries to build up a property empire and place hotels on every block.
But Monopoly is surely being served up as a symbol of something else. Playing it might well be the most boring thing Paris can thing of.
Posted: 12th, May 2008 | In: Celebrities, Paris Hilton | Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Madden About The Girl: A PH Test For Just Married Paris Hilton
IT’S Paris Hilton, straight-to-tissues home video star, heiress and American Royalty.
“PARIS MATCH,” says the Mirror as Benji Madden, a performer with pop band Good Charlotte, introduces her as his brother Joel’s sister-in-law.
Can Paris be married? And what does the gigantic diamond ring on her finger with the initials PH mean? The Mirror’s 3am girls, now reduced in number from three to two do not say, and lack the resources to investigate.
Anorak consults its big book of abbreviations to see PH: “Public House”; “Proportional Hazard”; and a test for acid.
Or what about “Photographer’s Hoof”, as the Sun reports on how Hilton and her “boyfriend” are accused of running over the foot of one Glen Gurniak?
Says he: “There were too many people that side of the car so he swung the wheels in my direction on the other side of the car and got my foot trapped under the wheel. I yelled at him, ’Dude, you’ve pinched my foot under the wheel, don’t drive, don’t drive.’”
Posted: 28th, April 2008 | In: Celebrities, Paris Hilton, Tabloids | Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Paris Hilton’s West Africa Love And Shoes
SAYS Paris Hilton: “I love Africa in general — South Africa and West Africa, they are both great countries.”
We like our celebrities to be a bit thick.
Pictures: 14’s parody (L); Paris; shoes (R)
Posted: 24th, March 2008 | In: Celebrities, Paris Hilton | Comments (6) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Football’s Paris Hilton, Paul Jewell, Shows Managers The Way Forward
PAUL Jewell, manager of Derby County football club, is “football’s Paris Hilton”.
Do not doubt that football needs a Paris Hilton. If football is to be Hollywood in shorts, then it needs to embrace all elements of showbusiness.
One-hit wonder Paul Gascoigne is Britney Spears, and some debate rages over whether Gary Neville or Steve McClaren is Simon Cowell. But Jewell is a shoo-in for Hilton on account of his singing ability, skin tones and allegations of a homemade movie.
Says the Star on Sunday: “The Derby County manager has called in lawyers to stop the DIY porn movie becoming a Paris Hilton style hit. It shows portly Paul in a series of kinky romps with a mystery blonde. The dad-of-two fears the footage could turn him into an unlikely internet sex star like heiress Paris, 27.”
Readers learn that the movie shows “former Bradford manager Jewell strapping his lover to the bed, slapping her bottom and pleasuring her with a sex toy. She wears black suspenders, stockings and boots”.
Forward With Jewell
While we envisage the boots and studs, and Jewell going in hard with his tackle, some may wonder if this is not Jewel’s preparation for life after football?
A celebrity sex tape never did anyone’s career any harm. Mr Jewell should release the tape and become an internet hit, securing a future in the media.
This will, of course, trigger copycat videos. Very soon other football bosses feeling the pressure – Derby County are bottom of the premier league – will release their sex tapes.
Roy Hodgson, beleaguered manager of Fulham will need to up and ante and produce a video of him romancing a goal post, followed by Wigan Athletic’s Steve Bruce’s antics with a range of gardening tools.
The trend will reach a crescendo when the ultra-competitive Alex Ferguson, contemplating the long dark tunnel of retirement from ‘the game’, produces a film featuring himself, the West Bangkok Manchester Untied Supporters’ Cub and a collection of battery-operated hairdryers…
Sven Goran Erkisson is the manager of Manchester City FC.
Posted: 24th, March 2008 | In: Back pages, Celebrities, Paris Hilton, Tabloids | Comments (6) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
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