Music news and reviews, music videos and tittle tattle, with a lingering look at the past from Anorak. A source for rock, pop, album and live music, new releases, artist interviews and features.
WILLIAM Shatner, for his cover of Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds, is usually cited as the cardinal wrongdoer among the long list of actors and actresses taking a spin at a singing career. But I must confess, Shat’s spoken-word rendition has grown on me. His sincerity and hamminess are just freaking adorable. For that matter, The Ballad of Bilbo Baggins by his Star Trek comrade, Leonard Nimoy, is equally endearing.
No, this list has nothing adorable in it. There’s nothing charming about a single chord on these celebrity records – nothing to latch onto and attach some redeeming quality. These are objectively awful from the first note to the last.
“Rape” by Peter Wyngard (1970)
In France of course, where fun is greedy
The women are a little more seedy
And rape is hardly ever necessary
JOHNNY Cash made a list of “Things To Do Today”.
Do to-do lists work?
Benjamin Franklin made a list. He tried too hard, say John Tierney and psychologist Roy F. Baumeister in Willpower: Rediscovering the Greatest Human Strength. (Via.)
Franklin tried a divide-and-conquer approach. He drew up a list of virtues and wrote a brief goal for each one, like this one for Order: ‘Let all your things have their places; let each part of your business have its time.’
When, as a young journeyman printer, he tried to practice Order by drawing up a rigid daily work schedule, he kept getting interrupted by unexpected demands from his clients — and Industry required him to ignore the schedule and meet with them. If he practiced Frugality (‘Waste nothing’) by always mending his own clothes and preparing all his own meals, there’d be less time available for Industry at his job — or for side projects like flying a kite in a thunderstorm or editing the Declaration of Independence. If he promised to spend an evening with his friends but then fell behind his schedule for work, he’d have to make a choice that would violate his virtue of Resolution: ‘Perform without fail what you resolve.’
Franklin wrote his list in 1726, at the age of 20. It’s more of a set of rules than a list. (Source: The Autobiography of Benjamin Franklin; Image: Benjamin Franklin, via.)
TEMPERANCE. Eat not to dullness; drink not to elevation.
SILENCE. Speak not but what may benefit others or yourself; avoid trifling conversation.
ORDER. Let all your things have their places; let each part of your business have its time.
RESOLUTION. Resolve to perform what you ought; perform without fail what you resolve.
FRUGALITY. Make no expense but to do good to others or yourself; i.e., waste nothing.
INDUSTRY. Lose no time; be always employ’d in something useful; cut off all unnecessary actions.
SINCERITY. Use no hurtful deceit; think innocently and justly, and, if you speak, speak accordingly.
JUSTICE. Wrong none by doing injuries, or omitting the benefits that are your duty.
MODERATION. Avoid extreams; forbear resenting injuries so much as you think they deserve.
CLEANLINESS. Tolerate no uncleanliness in body, cloaths, or habitation.
TRANQUILLITY. Be not disturbed at trifles, or at accidents common or unavoidable.
CHASTITY. Rarely use venery but for health or offspring, never to dulness, weakness, or the injury of your own or another’s peace or reputation.
HUMILITY. Imitate Jesus and Socrates.
Woody Guthrie made lists:
“Wake Up And Fight”
Jonathan Swift made this list in 1699:
Not to marry a young Woman.
Not to keep young Company unless they reely desire it.
Not to be peevish or morose, or suspicious.
Not to scorn present Ways, or Wits, or Fashions, or Men, or War, &c.
Not to be fond of Children, or let them come near me hardly.
Not to tell the same story over and over to the same People.
Not to be covetous.
Not to neglect decency, or cleenlyness, for fear of falling into Nastyness.
Not to be over severe with young People, but give Allowances for their youthfull follyes and weaknesses.
Not to be influenced by, or give ear to knavish tatling servants, or others.
Not to be too free of advise, nor trouble any but those that desire it.
To desire some good Friends to inform me wch of these Resolutions I break, or neglect, and wherein; and reform accordingly.
Not to talk much, nor of my self.
Not to boast of my former beauty, or strength, or favor with Ladyes, &c.
Not to hearken to Flatteryes, nor conceive I can be beloved by a young woman, et eos qui hereditatem captant, odisse ac vitare.
Not to be positive or opiniative.
Not to sett up for observing all these Rules; for fear I should observe none.
The Zeigarnik Effect is the tendency to experience intrusive thoughts about an objective that was once pursued and left incomplete (Baumeister & Bushman, 2008, pg. 122). The automatic system signals the conscious mind, which may be focused on new goals, that a previous activity was left incomplete. It seems to be human nature to finish what we start and, if it is not finished, we experience dissonance.
A study done by Greist-Bousquet and Schiffman (1992) provided evidence for the Zeigarnik Effect. In this paper, the authors stated that there is a tendency or “need” to complete a task once it has been initiated and the lack of closure that stems from an unfinished task promotes some continued task related cognitive effort. The cognitive effort that comes with these intrusive thoughts of the unfinished task is terminated only once the person returns to complete the task.
Tierney and Baumeister address that anew:
[It] turns out that the Zeigarnik effect is not, as was assumed for decades, a reminder that continues unabated until the task gets done. The persistence of distracting thoughts is not an indication that the unconscious is working to finish the task. Nor is it the unconscious nagging the conscious mind to finish the task right away. Instead, the unconscious is asking the conscious mind to make a plan. The unconscious mind apparently can’t do this on its own, so it nags the conscious mind to make a plan with specifics like time, place, and opportunity. Once the plan is formed, the unconscious can stop nagging the conscious mind with reminders.”
FLASHBACK to Delia Derbyshire (5 May 1937 – 3 July 2001).
Delia Derbyshire is the mathematics and music scholar most famous for creating the whirling intro to Dr Who. She was working at the BBC’s Radiophonic Workshop in 1963 when she was given Ron Grainer’s score.
* She used concrete sources and sine- and square-wave oscillators, tuning the results, filtering and treating, cutting so that the joins were seamless, combining sound on individual tape recorders, re-recording the results, and repeating the process, over and over again.
LIAM And Noel Gallagher love a good put-downs. Here are some of there best. It might even be a top ten.
Liam on Pete Doherty
“What does the word Libertine mean? Freedom!. He’s in the corner doing smack with a helmet on his head. There’s nothing free about that. It’s nasty.”
Noel on George Harrison:
“George was always the ‘Quiet Beatle’, maybe he should keep that up”
Noel On Liam:
“I read these interviews with him and I don’t know who the guy is who’s in these interviews, he seems really cool, because the guy I’ve been in a band with for the last 18 years is a fu*king knobhead.”
Noel on Jack White
“Jack White has just done a song for Coca-Cola. End of. He ceases to be in the club. And he looks like Zorro on doughnuts.”
Noel on Madonna
“Six hours! In a gym! You sleep for eight, right – so that’s 14 gone already. What do you do with your one hour off? Do you want to get so supple that you can eventually stick your own head up your arse?”
Liam on Bono (Mr G9)
“Play ‘One,’ shut the fu*k up about Africa.”
Noel (Manchester City fan) on Gary Neville (former Manchester United player)
“If Mr Neville continues to use the holy scriptures of Oasis to communicate with the Cockney massive, I shall be forced to come up to Cheshire in the middle of the night and break into his house. I will then tie him to a chair, make him listen to the ‘Best of Simply Red’ while I pull his tash out one grey hair at a time, with my teeth, liberate those Oasis CD’s and shit in his manbag. You have been warned!”
Noel on Westlife
“There is no God.”
Noel on Victoria Beckham
“WHY IS POSH BECKHAM WRITING A F***ING BOOK OF HER MEMOIRS? SHE CAN’T EVEN CHEW CHEWING GUM AND WALK IN A F***ING STRAIGHT LINE AT THE SAME TIME, LET ALONE WRITE A BOOK.”
Noel on Liam
“Liam got a Rolex. I got a Rolls Royce. Which is brilliant, cos I can’t drive and Liam can’t tell the time.”
Noel on the media and Jay Z
Noel on Liam
“He is Abbott to my Costello, he is Cannon to my Ball, he is Little to my Large”
Noel on Tim Lovejoy
Tim: “It was Liam’s birthday the other day weren’t it?”
Tim:”What did you get him?”
Noel:”(laughs) Nothing, we’re not girls, Tim..”
Noel on Blue
“I wish Blur were dead, John Lennon was alive and the Beatles would reform.”
Noel on Liam
“He thinks he’s Abel, for some weird reason. And I thought ‘right, well if you think you’re Abel, that must make me Cain. Didn’t Cain kill Abel?’”
Noel on Lady Gaga
“TWENTY YEARS FROM NOW, WILL WE LISTEN TO LADY GAGA? NO. SHE MIGHT THINK SHE IS MAKING A STAND FOR THE FREAKS AND THE WEIRDOS. BUT THEY’RE NOT GOING TO HAVE ANY DECENT F***ING MUSIC TO PLAY ARE THEY?”
Noel on Liam
“Liam? He’s the angriest man you’ll ever meet. He’s like a man with a fork in a world of soup.”
Watch this space…
ONCE upon a time “underage sex” was a selling point used by The Rolling Stones’ marketing department. Back in 1994 for the Stones’ Voodoo Lounge tour, the legend went:
“Stones Withstand Divorce, Slander, Rip-Offs, Slagging, Under-Age Sex, Alcohol, Drugs”
MUSICIANS are adorable aren’t they? They’re never too bright and they get silly ideas and see them through without thinking about it. Look at Johnny Borrell’s entire career. Look at Thom Yorke thinking he’s a clever man. It’s sweet.
Anyway, rapper Watsky has had to apologise for being ‘stupid and wildly irresponsible’ after leaping from a lighting rig and injuring two people during a London gig.
Performing at the Vans Warped Tour at Alexandra Palace, he decided to climb up the light rigging and leap from 30ft in the air into the crowd.
YOU may or may not be aware, Noel Edmonds is making his way to the pop charts with an unlikely appearance in a dance track (warning, it is rather abrasive).
You can hear it below. Of course, he’s not the first radio DJ to have a stab at the charts, so with that, let us look at some of the weird and wonderful moments in pop music when radio jockeys ended up in the beast they presided over.
Candice Cannes’ Are You Ready features Noel Edmonds in his Deal Or No Deal guise while a woman mutters nonsense in a seductive voice.
THE Beatles At The BBC.
London calling all “Beatle People”
TWO decades ago, the Great Beatles Revival began with the release of the double CD album Live at the BBC. Like their regular albums, it duly hit number one on both sides of the Atlantic, and shifted no fewer than five million copies in the couple of months. Now the original set has been remastered and reissued simultaneously with a further collection: On Air – Live at the BBC Volume 2.
Both sets consist of radio interviews and performances from the mid-Sixties, and together they provide a fascinating picture of the biggest band of all time – at a time when such a concept was meaningless. This is an evocative and fascinating reminder of an era in which the Beatles were making their own rules, and bursting exponentially from the cosy confines of post-war light entertainment like a small child outgrowing successive pairs of shoes.
WANT to hear Miley Cyrus’ Wrecking Ball in G-major. To augment the horror, the musical subversive inverted the colours on Miley’s hammer-licking vid.
CAN we agree whose side we are on in this story from Beacon Hill, Highclere, in Hampshire?
Around midnight last Saturday, police rocked up to a rave.
Some of the revellers threw things at Hampshire and Thames Valley Police’s finest. A Hampshire Constabulary spokesman tells us: ”Officers were subjected to violence, including missiles thrown at them, which resulted in six officers sustaining non-serious injuries. It is believed between about 80 and 100 people attended the illegal event. We will continue to take every measure possible to prevent any such illegal music events from happening… in the future.”
Music events should all be legal and policed and licensed. Say no to spontaneity. Like Glastonbury, music should be policed and made reassuringly expensive to keep the riff-raff out.
IN 1966 Pete Townshend wrote about the Dipso Asbo Fatso British public. He called it Fat Lazy People.
The song was recorded by the Barron Knights, a group famous for spoof songs, such as this Santa-Floyd mash-up
Photo: Easter kiss for Duke D’Mond from his wife Pauline Palmer, at Heathrow Airport saying goodbye to him and his fellow Barron Knights, left to right; Barron Anthony, Dave Ballinger, P’Nut Langford and Buth Baker at the start of a six week tour. Date: 27/03/1970
And there was this, a Taste Of Aggro (with apologies to The Smurfs.)
Before that, The Knights were a proper band whose claim to fame was being the only outfit to tour with both the Beatles and the Rolling Stones.
They could, after all, do passable impressions of all the greats:
Here’s the song:
Lazy and fat they are, they are.
And because they are all the same..
They laugh and exclaim
“The young are so funny”
They burn in the sun, the sun
And though painfully pink, when it rains
They always complain
“We all paid our money.”
Oh! The lazy fat people
Are a terrible sight to see.
And the lazy fat people will
Get the better of you and me…….
Lazy and fat they are, they are.
Their children diet till thin
To leave more for them
“To save us some money.”
Oh! The lazy fat people will
Try to sit on you and me
If we dont watch out theyll
Get the better of you and me.
How to tell the young from the
Lazy fat is easy to do…..
Take it away, Pete:
APPARENTLY, pop music is just too sexy – so say some tutting parents from the website Netmums (think; Tesco Value Mumsnet). They polled their members and found that 80% of respondents have seen their children singing or repeating sexual lyrics without realising their meaning.
That’s good isn’t it? Children not knowing the sexual connotations of things! That’s bad of the parents though, isn’t it? Letting them listen to whatever they want.
FLASHBACK to 03/11/1973: Faces of celebrities in various walks of life illustrate the cover of a new long-playing record, Band on the Run, from the Paul McCartney group, Wings. From left,…
Well, can you name them all? Scroll down for the famous names, or VIPs , as they were called back then:
“Taxman” – “It sounds like a cross between the Who and Batman. It’s a bit limited, but the Beatles get over this by the sexy double-tracking. It’s surprising how sexy double-tracking makes a voice sound.”
“Eleanor Rigby” – “I bought a Haydn LP the other day and this sounds just like it. It’s all sort of quartet stuff and it sounds like they’re out to please music teachers in primary schools. I can imagine John saying: ‘I’m going to write this for my old schoolmistress’. Still it’s very commercial.”
“I’m Only Sleeping” – “It’s a most beautiful song, much prettier than ‘Eleanor Rigby’. A jolly old thing, really, and definitely the best track on the album.
“Love You Too” – “George wrote this – he must have quite a big influence on the group now. This sort of song I was doing two years ago – now I’m doing what the Beatles were doing two years ago. It’s not a bad song – it’s well performed which is always true of a Beatles track.”
“Here There and Everywhere” – “This proves that the Beatles have got good memories, because there are a lot of busy chords in it. It’s nice – like one instrument with the voice and the guitar merging. Third best track on the album.”
“Yellow Submarine” – “”This is a load of rubbish, really. I take the mickey out of myself on the piano and play stuff like this. I think they know it’s not that good.”
“She Said She Said” – “This song is in to restore confidence in old Beatles sound. That’s all.”
“Good Day Sunshine” – “This’ll be a giant. It doesn’t force itself on you, but it stands out like ‘I’m Only Sleeping’. This is back to the real old Beatles. I just don’t like the electronic stuff. The Beatles were supposed to be like the boy next door only better.”
“And Your Bird Can Sing” – “Don’t like this. The song’s too predictable. It’s not a Beatles song at all.”
“Dr. Robert” - “It’s good – there’s a 12-bar beat and bits in it that are clever. Not my sort of thing, though.”
“I Want To Tell You” – “This helps the LP through though it’s not up to the Beatles standard.”
“Got To Get You Into My Life” – “Jazz backing – and it just goes to prove that Britain’s jazz musicians can’t swing. Paul’s sings better jazz than the musicians are playing which makes nonsense of people saying jazz and pop are very different. Paul sounds like Little Richard. Really, it’s the most vintage Beatles track on the LP.”
“Tomorrow Never Knows” – “Listen to all those crazy sounds! It’ll be popular in discotheques. I can imagine they had George Martin tied to a totem pole when they did this.”
“This is the first Beatles LP I’ve really listened to in it’s entirety but I must say there are better songs on ‘Rubber Soul’. Still, ‘I’m Only Sleeping’ is a standout. ‘Good Day Sunshine is second best and I also like ‘Here, There and Everywhere.’ But I don’t want to be harsh about the others. The balance and recording technique are as good as ever.”
EVER on the look out for great pop tributes, her’s the Johnny Cash Converters in Epsom.
ROD Stewart and the rest of The Faces played London’s Marquee Club in December of 1970. Ron Wood, Kenny Jones, Ronnie Lane, Ian McLagen never looked better than in this video recorded for German TV “WDR”.
If the camera was any closer, one sniff and you’d be inside one of rock’s greatest noses:
PAUL Dutton, 48, was ejected from his local branch of Asda in Cambridge, after a fellow shopper complained about his attire – a classic formal black suit of the type produced by Hugo Boss in the 1940s.
Unfortunately this suit happened to closely resemble the uniform of Hitler’s notorious SS, and even more unfortunately the resemblance was entirely uncoincidental. Mr Dutton’s “hobby” is Adolf Hitler, you see, and his fascination is such that his living room boasts a painting of himself being decorated by the Fuhrer – a man who once earned an honest living decorating people’s homes as a housepainter.
WITH the Red Hot Chili Peppers in Brazil for a concert, drummer Chad Smith went to the Hard Rock Cafe in Belo Horizonte and earned the wrath of Flamengo fans.Why? Well, during the drum clinic a fan in the crowd handed Smith a Flamengo shirt. Smith duly stuffed it down his bum crack and then tossed it away.
TO herald the release of her album ARTPOP. Lady Gaga stood at New York’s Brooklyn Navy Yard and showcased the Volantis transport prototype “flying dress.” She said: ”Although she is a vehicle, she, is essentially a metaphor for me.”
She is her own biggest fan.
THE £100 reserve price for Ian Curtis’ kitchen gable had yet to be met.
The item is the genuine deal. A certificate of authenticity has been signed by Curtis’ daughter Natalie and Curtis’ widow Debbie . The table was owned by Curtis’ neighbour, whose daughter – the seller – has also vouched for its providence.
Dorothy Smith bought 77 Barton Street, Macclesfield, with everything in it from Debbie.
The seller narrates the table’s history:
In 1996 the table was passed to Dorothy’s Daughter Vicky Morgan when she got married and set up home in Macclesfield. In December 2005 the Morgan’s were redecorating and felt that the table no longer fitted in with their own home. They offered the table back to the family and contacted them via Marco of Joy Division Central.
With the filming of Control taking place in Barton Street and Natalie Curtis arranging the props the table was offered but was declined.
Natalie Curtis, Ian and Debbie’s daughter was then going to take the table for her own flat but in the end decided to have one of her mums instead which belonged to her Grandmother.
At that point it went on Ebay and I travelled to Macclesfield after winning the bid.
So. You can buy the kitchen table where Ian Curtis might have eaten an egg or tapped out a melody to a Joy Division hit or contemplated suicide: 0n May 18 1980, Ian Curtis the singer of Joy Division committed suicide in the kitchen.
The Measurements are:-
- 75 cm Wide
- 98 cm Long
- 76 cm Tall
- Extend Flaps 28 cm each.
I easily got this table into my car, which if you have a 5 door car with seats that go down anyone else with a reasonable size car should do also.
Pop artefacts don’t come any more mundane than this.
ELTON John. Liberace. George Michael. All gay. We know this because they can play musical instruments. Lemmy, Mick Jagger and even Cliff Richard are all either gay or else faking it and not playing any instrument or singing. No less an authority that an imam says that only gay men play music.
DANCING foetus, Justin Bieber, has been trying his darnedest to be a man in recent years, spitting off balconies, giving fruity hand gestures to paps and generally throwing wobblers all over the place.
Now, he’s found himself in the middle of a very weird scenario with one woman filming him while he slept.
The story went like this: The woman who videotaped a sleeping Bieber was a prostitute. The unidentified woman blows a kiss to a passed out popstar and everyone assumed she was a prostitute that the singer had paid for.
HURRA Torpedo play music with your kitchen. They are:
Egil Hegerberg – bass guitar, guitar, vocals.
Kristopher Schau – percussion, backing vocals
Aslag Guttormsgaard – percussion, guitar, vocals
(Morphy Richards is away.)
Here’s the Torpedos in 1983 playing Bonnie Tyler’s Total Eclipse of the Heart.