Celebrity news & gossip from the world’s showbiz and glamour magazines (OK!, Hello, National Enquirer and more). We read them so you don’t have to, picking the best bits from the showbiz world’s maw and spitting it back at them. Expect lots of sarcasm.
JET Harris RIP. You were born Terence Harris. you were one of The Shadows, Cliff Richards’ backing group. The other claim to fame is that Cliff had an affair with your wife, Carol Costa.
Jet left the band in the early 1960s. Cliff became a pop preacher…
KATIE Price, aka Jordan, has usurped Her Majesty the Queen’s Royal box (fnar). So reports the Daily Star in the front-page screamer entitled:
“QUEEN JORDAN UNSEATS ROYALS – she hijacks Her Maj’s box at races”
Anorak sees an image of Jordan running off with said box, spraying it orange and sticking some peonies in it. Keen to erase the image from mind, we read on:
Katie Price was the queen of celebrity as she partied in the royal box at Cheltenham yesterday. Horse-mad star Katie Price watched the Gold Cup race with new boyfriend Leandro Penna, 25.
IN a story about a night out with CAN Associates’ bright clientele Nicola McLean, Amy Childs, Mel B’s sister (!) Danielle Brown and Kerry Katona, the Mail featured a photo that can be described as revealing. You can see it here. The Mail first pixelated the image up McLean’s skirt and then removed it from its website entirely.
Is this a sign of editorial debate at the Mail?
WE went to Selfridge’s to sniff the scented air around the actor Orlando Bloom. He’s the face of Boss Orange Aftershave. To give you a clue as to what it smells of, bloom wore a comfy jumper, black lace ups and sat in a leathery chair. Add to this the Bloom’s acting oeuvre as the pirate prince of the Caribbean and the smell is like the officer’s quarters in a submarine. Splendid stuff.
Orlando tells Elle:
“I wasn’t really a ‘fragrance guy’ before, but Boss Orange is so easy to wear. It adds another dimension to my personality. I wouldn’t have done it if it didn’t fit my personality; it’s so easy going, you can go mountain biking in it if you want!”
DEAR Anorak, while looking at a Twitter photo of a pregnant Myleene Klass plastered in white substance thoughts turned to memorable night with the Friends Of Charlie Sheen rugby XI and Octomum Nadia Suleman.
ANORAK presents the greatest movie gifs ever. Can a single moment of film capture the essence of the whole? Yes. (Give them time to load – they’re worth it.)
This site gives a short history of Pena – and thanks to Google translate, he sounds intriguing:
Apparently, the Spanish network Univision Penna hired to star in a fictional U.S. “They knew that people wanted to have a personality Chopard America at the Oscars and I was recommended to me. It’s that simple, “explained the model, who seems to have been touched by the magic wand.
When he’s not examining Katie’s exit wounds, Leandro is being commented on by a “source” close to Alex Reid, the current Mr Katie Price last seen living in her shoe cupboard:
Would that be Katie Middleton and Elen MacArthur, famed yachtswomen?
No. It turns out to be Katie Price, formerly a client of PR firm Can Associates, who now represent Price’s former husband Peter Andre, and Elen Rivas, also a client of Can Associates and Andre’s current lover.
PALOMA Faith reacts on Twitter to the Japanese disaster and that nuclear issue:
Just saw the photos of japan disaster in the metro. Its just shocking. And what a worry all that nuclear energy. Why was it even invented?
Let us pray…
“JOSIE ALONE – ‘HE FORCED ME TO HAVE AN ABORTION’”
Inside we get:
“I made a lot of mistakes in my past and one thing is for certain, I ain’t going back for anyone.”
REBECCA Black sings the world’s most annoying, vacuous, dumb song- ever. I lasted 1 minute and 41 seconds. You..?
POOR old Peaches Geldof. She’s the rich rebel who arrived at the swingers’ orgy to find mum and dad handing out towels. She’s in the news because her name has been linked with a dress, allegedly, no longer at the Three Amigos store in Camden Town. The talk is of a “misunderstanding” and alleged shoplifting.
The Independent Police Complaints Commission is investigating the death that followed a raid by the Metropolitan Police.
JUSTIN Bieber was at London’s O2 venue. When the countdown clock struck Bieber Time, the Violet Elizabeth Bott and Little Jimmy Osmond love child arrived on stage with his flies undone. Hey, don’t be too harsh. Firstly, he’s a popstar and soon all the cool kids will be doing it. Secondly, “Look, ma, no pull ups!”
He then played an acoustic guitar as he flew in a caged heart. The kidz loved it. Mum and dad wondered why they spent £15 on a programme. Enjoy the photos:
JIM Davidson is tlaking about racism on Newsnight:
“I think we’ve moved on now. I don’t think racism exists like it did in the 1970s. For instance, I wouldn’t do Chalky now because all my black friends don’t have West Indian accents.”
HAS the Daily Star Reporter delivered a story that sums up the world of celebrity and its relationship with Cheryl Cole, a woman who hyped abilities exceed her actual qualities by a factor of 36 to 1 (fact!)?
DEFIANT Cheryl Cole has again ended all contact with football star husband Ashley.
Troubled Kerry has been scoffing Chinese takeaways and beef curries after starving herself for months for the skating show. Her weight has crept up to eight- and-a-half stone and she has gone from a slinky size 8 to a curvy 10.
“Obviously, we’re very lucky to be expecting again, and this is the first time I’m going to say it: It’s a little girl. We’re still in shock. Obviously, having three boys, you kind of expect another one, so finding out a little girl is in there is surprising, but, obviously, we are over the moon. Our three boys are happy and excited, and Victoria is doing well.”
IN JAPAN, at least 40 people have been killed and 39 are missing after an earthquake of the magnitude 8.9 unleashed a 23ft tsunami. Bad news for them. And worrying for celebrities taking to twitter to advertise how much they care:
Shane Warne – he’s bearing up:
“Goodnight-everything crossed for people in japan and for the people who have a tsunami warning. No more natural disasters please-can’t cope.”
THE UK Asian Music in Photos: Asian music is credible and, vitally for the music biz, saleable. The likes of the excellent Asian Dub Foundation never made it big in the mainstream because the mechanism was not there to promote the acts in the media and secure recordable record sales (much Asian music is still sold in small shops and not recorded in official chart data).
TAMARA Ecclestone is talking about her life and money in OK!, as she did for Hello! way back in February. Back then she showed off her 17 Hermes Bikrin bags. She told us:
“For me, ‘spoilt’ means ruined, and I don’t feel ruined.”
Now Bernie’s daughter tells us:
“I’ve got about 50 pairs of Louboutins.”
She also tells us that she likes bargain hunting – “I’ve been to sample sale before.”
“I’d like to fade into non-existence until I meet someone.”
(Has Katie Price even been in the same room at the same time as Jordan? – ed)
We are given an insight into the scene in the Sun. A “thug” approaches. He asks:
“Where’s your girlfriend?”
Hello… Is married Dec playing away? No. The Sun explains:
The taunt referred to Ant’s comedy partner Declan Donnelly.
BRITNEY Spears is posing seductively for Out Magazine. Before the photos that are less airbrushing than airmopping, Britney says that she was once Audrey Hepburn, in a former life.
Hepburn went to the great tomato in the sky in 1993. Brit was hatched in 1981.
Other than that they are two peas in a pod: one a petite pois, the other a marafat pea ready to be mushed.