Anorak

Celebrities | Anorak - Part 3

Celebrities Category

Celebrity news & gossip from the world’s showbiz and glamour magazines (OK!, Hello, National Enquirer and more). We read them so you don’t have to, picking the best bits from the showbiz world’s maw and spitting it back at them. Expect lots of sarcasm.

Brexit triggers a return to Page 3 and home-made British porn

Of course, if your really want to celebrate the UK leaving the European Union, you don’t need Nigel Farage’s underwear. You don’t need any underwear. You just need the Sun to reinvigorate Page 3 and invite Rhian Sugden to …

Posted: 30th, March 2017 | In: Celebrities, Tabloids | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Carole Middleton’s Easter party tips leave a bitter aftertaste in the Mail

pippa middleton book mail on sunday

 

The battle between the Daily Mail and its sister organ the Mail on Sunday continues. Sebastian Shakespeare uses his Mail social diary to tell readers about “former air hostess” Carole Middleton and her daughter Pippa Middleton. Carole has written …

Posted: 22nd, March 2017 | In: Celebrities, Royal Family, Tabloids | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Chuck Berry: the King is dead so let’s give his body a good kicking

chuck berry hail

 

No sooner is Chuck Berry dead than the Mirror pulls on the boots and gives his bones a good kick. The rock’n’roller who gave full throat to all the taboo-busting stuff the olds hated is the subject of the …

Posted: 20th, March 2017 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts, Tabloids | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


James Brown’s miracle cape is for sale

Start saving up. Reach down the back of the sofa. Consider getting along on one lung. James Brown’s cape is for sale. You’ll needed around £25,000 to get it.

The silver sequinned cape was gifted to the soul singer by …

Posted: 18th, March 2017 | In: Celebrities, Fashion, The Consumer | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


The F-rating doesn’t give an F-word about movies

The movement towards creating explicit codes of behaviour for every aspect of life – especially the messy bits about sex –  welcomes the Internet Movie Database (IMDb), which is now using the ‘F-rating’ to signal films of a feminist type. …

Posted: 15th, March 2017 | In: Film, Money, News | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Mary Berry’s ‘shocking and appalling’ TV dinner

Big news in the Telegraph, wherein TV cook Mary Berry is causing viewers of her show to gasp and gag. The paper tells us:

Mary Berry’s bolognese recipe leaves viewers ‘shocked and appalled’ because of its unusual ingredients

What …

Posted: 7th, March 2017 | In: Broadsheets, Celebrities | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Celebrity Weed Farm: BGT dancer inspires new TV show

Remember Stavros Flatley, the chubby fella from Britain’s Got Talent, whose dance with his chubby son scored them a job on Sugar Free Farm with Ann Widdecombe, Alison Hammond and Gemma Collins, a show which proved that shovelling shit …

Posted: 6th, March 2017 | In: Celebrities, Tabloids | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Jordan Horowitz wrongly awarded best director Oscar in the Telegraph

How bad is the Daily Telegraph’s subbing? In its report on the monumental Oscars ‘fiasco’ (its word) that saw the Oscar for Best Picture awarded to the wrong movie – the paper calls it ‘the worst blunder in Hollywood …

Posted: 28th, February 2017 | In: Broadsheets, Celebrities | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Hard man Danny Dyer whipped out his ‘Brighton front’?

When actor Danny Dyer toured the world’s ‘Football Factories’, he hung about with “hard men”. There were hard men all around him. Whether Dyer was a hard man was never made clear, but today the Sun says he might have …

Posted: 24th, February 2017 | In: Celebrities, Tabloids | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Pamela Anderson and Julian Assange’s leaky love affair

Former Playboy model and swimsuit-clad floatation aide Pamela Anderson is, reportedly, staying in with WikiLeaks founder, Julian Assange. You wonder if being indoors at the Ecuadorean embassy in London since 2012 has dulled Assange’s taste buds and ambitions. The story …

Posted: 17th, February 2017 | In: Celebrities | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Oh Do Fuck Off: Piers Morgan is not Trump’s Goebbels

 

When Piers Morgan was told to ‘Fuck off’ on the telly by Australian comedian Jim Jeffries, right-thinkers on twitter loved it. Morgan, who identifies himself without invitation as Donald Trump’s mate, pointed out that there is no ban on …

Posted: 12th, February 2017 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts, News, Politicians | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


The media hounding of ‘dishevelled’ Tara Palmer-Tomkinson: an ill woman is not fair game

Sad news that Tara Palmer-Tomkinson has died at just 45 years of age. Anyone able to make a living form having fun must have something about her. Today the tabloids are full of kind words about the ‘tragic’ (Sun) socialite …

Posted: 9th, February 2017 | In: Celebrities, Tabloids | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


David Beckham and Danny Cipriani: you can’t be victim if you’re famous

Is it a crime to be famous? This week, two stories about blackmail have occupied the Sun’s front page.

The first is the matter of messages hacked from a server that handles David Beckham’s emails. The hackers wanted money to …

Posted: 8th, February 2017 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts, Sports, Tabloids | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


What its like to have sex with Simon Cowell, by Alicia Douvall

A small word of thanks to Alicia Douvall, the pneumatic ‘cosmetic surgery addict’ giving full throat to the Daily Star’s front-page screamer, yeller and ‘oh-my-god-yes’ about ‘MY ELEVEN TIMES A NIGHT WITH SIMON COWELL’. Eleven times a night doing what? …

Posted: 8th, February 2017 | In: Celebrities, Tabloids | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Hacked emails reveal David Beckham swears like a footballer

In what the Sun calls ‘leaked emails’ David Beckham allegedly wrote about his disappointment at receiving an OBE and not a knighthood in the kind of language you’d expect from a footballer. He allegedly called the Honours Committee “unappreciative c***s”. …

Posted: 6th, February 2017 | In: Celebrities, Google News, Key Posts, Tabloids | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Beyonce’s womb becomes an other venue on Jay Z’s arena tour

Beyonce and Jay Z are getting a divorce, announces the National Enquirer on its front page. What are the details? Well, it’s worth $1bn and it ‘EXPLODES!’. A clue as to why the showbiz stars are apparently splitting is hinted …

Posted: 2nd, February 2017 | In: Celebrities, Tabloids | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Rory McGrath’s sex and crimes play second fiddle to his ‘phenomenal’ wife

nicola-mcgrath

 

The tabloids focus as much on Rory McGrath’s blameless wife Nicola as they do on the “TV star” (Sun) found guilty at Huntington magistrates’ court of harassing a former mistress.

“Wife stands by comedian,” says the Express front-page. “Incredible …

Posted: 27th, January 2017 | In: Celebrities, Tabloids | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Police ‘holding George Michael’s body’ as tabloid investigation continues

George Michael’s body is being “Held By Police”, says the Star. “Funeral is on hold over drug mystery,” adds the teaser.

 

George Michael death daily star

 

That this is front-page news might lead readers to suspect and expect the story is a …

Posted: 27th, January 2017 | In: Celebrities, Tabloids | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Madonna waves the hand sanitizer on kid-scouting mission to Malawi

Madonna is going to adopt more children. Yeah, that’s what we thought. But Barron Trump seems pretty happy where he is. No, Madonna is going to adopt two children from Malawi.

Madge is stocking up on antibacterial gel and looking …

Posted: 26th, January 2017 | In: Celebrities, Tabloids | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Madonna misses the White House as envious celebs bask in Trump’s light

madonna-v-trump

 

In the twilight area between fact and fiction lies the Daily Star. Today’s Star leads with the sensational news that Donald Trump is “IN CELEBRITY BIG BOTHER”.

Such is the way of Trump, it might be that the thin-skinned …

Posted: 23rd, January 2017 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts, Politicians, Tabloids | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


The CIA files: Uri Geller is a weapon less powerful than Donald’ Trump’ little finger

Is Uri Geller a weapon? What about just a bit of a weapon? The Star hears the spoon-bender say he met with the CIA to see if he could be “used as a weapon”.

This is promising idea, readers. If …

Posted: 19th, January 2017 | In: Celebrities, Tabloids | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Celebrity Big Brother: bonking bonkers in TV’s Bedlam

william-hogarth-does-big-brother

 

You know Celebrity Big Brother is dead when something better and harder-edged comes along to replace it. The Star trails the new show on its cover: “VIOLENT BBC STAR PULLED OUT Of HOUSE – Locked in ‘padded cell’ by …

Posted: 19th, January 2017 | In: Celebrities, Tabloids, TV & Radio | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Big Brother: Katie Price stars in race row homophobic repeat

The Daily Star presses f9 on the keyboard and gargles up news on Katie Price, the former glamour model “BACK IN CELEBRITY BIG BROTHER”. For those of you not watching the current series of CBB – yes, it’s still on …

Posted: 5th, January 2017 | In: Celebrities, Tabloids, TV & Radio | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0