Strange News, Politics, Sport, and Celebrity on the Anorak
Splash News on Michael Jackson’s death - “It’s like the FA Cup final”
SUSAN Boyle is released from The Priory mental clinic and signs a deal with a record company to promote her new album. The name of that record company is…
SyCo
It’s Simon Cowell’s record label.
No, not SiCo. It’s SyCo. As in Psycho.
It’s nominative determinism at work.
Posted: 7th, June 2009 | In: Celebrities, Magazines, Susan Boyle | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
George Bush Goes And Mad Magazine Follows
FIRST George Bush goes. Now this…
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 25th, January 2009 | In: Magazines | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Kerry Katona On Ice: New Body, New Mindset, New Pint
KERRY Katona, formerly Kerry McPadding, is lying face down on a bed telling Zoo magazine readers about the time her home was raided by villains masked.
Zoo: “Do you think they targeted you because of who you are?”
KK: “Definitely not. They did a few houses around my way. Plus, when they walked in, they shouted: ‘Hey, you’re that bird from Atomic Kitten.’”
Video - Kerry on This Morning, reliving the ordeal:
Posted: 22nd, October 2008 | In: Celebrities, Kerry Katona, Magazines | Comments (17) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Jenny McCarthy Collaborates With God On Cure For Autism
JENNY McCarthy’, a jobbing Hollywood blonde had a son. And with a showbiz son comes a new career opportunity.
As bad luck had it Jenny’s son was especially special. Jenny’s son was diagnosed with autism. Jenny believes the MMR vaccine was the cause.
So Jenny did what any celebrity would do faced with a special child - she made a new career talking about MMR, her son and his autism. She has written five books on the matter.
Then she cured him.
She tells US Weekly magazine:
Posted: 17th, October 2008 | In: Celebrities, Magazines | Comments (10) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Jordan and PAPA Polish Up In Love Affirmation Ceremony
AFTER the TV show, Jordan is “finally” responding to the clamour and will tell OK! readers about her marriage.
Or what there was of it. Says Jordan of her romance with pop acorn Peter Andre (PAPA): “WHY I WALKED OUT ON PETE.” She is showing readers her clean hand, and muscular naked ring finger. “It looks like I’ll be a single mum.”
Jordan gets the photo spread and the kids, and PAPA gets to wax his back, crack and sack on daytime telly.
Posted: 15th, October 2008 | In: Celebrities, Jordan and Peter Andre, Magazines, OK! | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Jordan and PAPA Polish Up In Love Affirmation Ceremony
AFTER the TV show, Jordan is “finally” responding to the clamour and will tell OK! readers about her marriage.
Or what there was of it. Says Jordan of her romance with pop acorn Peter Andre (PAPA): “WHY I WALKED OUT ON PETE.” She is showing readers her clean hand, and muscular naked ring finger. “It looks like I’ll be a single mum.”
Jordan gets the photo spread and the kids, and PAPA gets to wax his back, crack and sack on daytime telly.
Posted: 15th, October 2008 | In: Celebrities, Jordan and Peter Andre, Magazines, OK! | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
British Society of Magazine Editors Woos David Cameron
THE British Society of Magazine Editors invites members to:
Monday 13 October
BSME DAVID CAMERON RECEPTION
Member-only event hosted by David Cameron at his offices.
How very grand. What’s it about, then?
THE BIG DEBATE
THE WEB NEEDS MAGAZINES MORE THAN MAGAINES NEED THE WEB
Yeah, who needs the wbe..? Nor thsoe magaines. Beyond parody…
Posted: 6th, October 2008 | In: David Cameron, Magazines, Politicians | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Nicole Kidman Has Been Dipped In…
THE cover of Elle magazine. Nicole Kidman’s face has the texture and finish of a fresh-laid egg. Is this her? What has Nicole Kidman been dipped in? And she was once married to Tom Cruise…
Is she pulling back her hair or her head?
Posted: 5th, October 2008 | In: Celebrities, Magazines, Photojournalism | Comments (3) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Remembering Mahatma Ghandi With Bread
IT’S close to Mahatma Gandhi’s 139th birthday. Im Amritsa, the boys are playing at reincarnation; although some may not be as they claim.
And in the UK:
IT was Gandhi who said, ‘There are people in the world so hungry that God cannot appear to them expect in the form of bread.’ That is unlikely to apply to Robert Schofield, boss of the UK’s biggest food manufacturer, Premier Foods” – The Grocer
To remember in our prayers…
Posted: 2nd, October 2008 | In: Magazines, Photojournalism | Comments (22) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
The A To Z Of Celebrity Illnesses
READING this week’s OK! is to venture into the A to Z of Celebrity Diseases.
Victoria Beckham would like OK! readers to know: “I HATE LOOKING AT MYSELF IN THE MIRROR.”
For such reasons does Her Poshness appear in magazines and thereby gets to see herself in glossy print.
Natasha Hamilton, a singer, tells us about “MY DEVASTATING MISCARRIAGE”. Although she pulled herself together to watch Disney’s On Ice Finding Nemo, which the kids “loved”.
And Girl Aloud singer Nadine Coyle tells us:
“I kept getting ill, coming out in cold sores with the stress. Then a found a lump in my breast.”
And? And it wasn’t cancer. But it could have been. It could have been a piece of gristle. But it could have been cancer. And Nemo could have died.
Posted: 1st, October 2008 | In: Celebrities, Magazines, OK! | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
The A To Z Of Celebrity Illnesses
READING this week’s OK! is to venture into the A to Z of Celebrity Diseases.
Victoria Beckham would like OK! readers to know: “I HATE LOOKING AT MYSELF IN THE MIRROR.”
For such reasons does Her Poshness appear in magazines and thereby gets to see herself in glossy print.
Natasha Hamilton, a singer, tells us about “MY DEVASTATING MISCARRIAGE”. Although she pulled herself together to watch Disney’s On Ice Finding Nemo, which the kids “loved”.
And Girl Aloud singer Nadine Coyle tells us:
“I kept getting ill, coming out in cold sores with the stress. Then a found a lump in my breast.”
And? And it wasn’t cancer. But it could have been. It could have been a piece of gristle. But it could have been cancer. And Nemo could have died.
Posted: 1st, October 2008 | In: Celebrities, Magazines, OK! | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Styrofoam, The Essence Of Kerry Katona
KERRY Katona uses her OK! Diary to tell us that’s she has a perfume coming out in October.
Parfumiers are right not harvesting the contents of Kerry’s knickers, sheets and husband for an essence that can be boiled, distilled and poured into a styrofoam burger box.
Posted: 1st, October 2008 | In: Celebrities, Kerry Katona, Magazines, OK! | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Styrofoam, The Essence Of Kerry Katona
KERRY Katona uses her OK! Diary to tell us that’s she has a perfume coming out in October.
Parfumiers are right not harvesting the contents of Kerry’s knickers, sheets and husband for an essence that can be boiled, distilled and poured into a styrofoam burger box.
Posted: 1st, October 2008 | In: Celebrities, Kerry Katona, Magazines, OK! | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Cheryl Cole and Amanda Holden Put BOAST On Hold
CALLS are coming in thick and fast to Anorak’s BOAST hotline. All orders are final, but Cheryl Cole and Amanda Holden are unsure…
Says Cheryl of her time before husband Ashley was accused of vomiting on their marriage vows:
“I was really broody. I’d see children and think that’s me. I’m ready” - Sun
The call to BOAST was made. But then cancelled. Sadly the children are sat in our storeroom awaiting despatch. No refunds but they can be exchanged…
Amanda Holden is on line 2:
Posted: 1st, October 2008 | In: Celebrities, Magazines, Tabloids | Comments (6) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
New Yorker’s Ahmadinejad Wins Cover Of The Year
MAHMOUD Ahmadinejad is Senator Larry’s Craig toilet toe-tapper.
It’s the 2008 magazine cover of the year. Here’s our winner:
Senator Larry Craig Wants To Engage You
Mitt Romney Supporter Senator Larry Craig’s Toilet Two-Step
Posted: 24th, September 2008 | In: Magazines, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, Photojournalism, Politicians, Twitterings | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Cheryl Cole’s Water Retention And Karma Suits Yer
CHERYL COLE wants you to know that “I CAN’T CRY ANY MORE THAN I’VE CRIED.”
Cheryl Cole has suffered, although not from water retention.
“I WAS CLINICALLY DEPRESSED AND UNDER SIX STONE,” says the headline.
Moving inside OK!, past “CHERYL WALKS AND TALKS” to Cheryl weeps and wails.
It’s not all about Cheryl, and this is a feature on she and her Girls Aloud bandmates. And we will get to whatsherface, the skinny one, the very skinny one and the one with the red-hair soon enough.
Posted: 24th, September 2008 | In: Celebrities, Magazines, OK! | Comments (4) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Cheryl Cole’s Water Retention And Karma Suits Yer
CHERYL COLE wants you to know that “I CAN’T CRY ANY MORE THAN I’VE CRIED.”
Cheryl Cole has suffered, although not from water retention.
“I WAS CLINICALLY DEPRESSED AND UNDER SIX STONE,” says the headline.
Moving inside OK!, past “CHERYL WALKS AND TALKS” to Cheryl weeps and wails.
It’s not all about Cheryl, and this is a feature on she and her Girls Aloud bandmates. And we will get to whatsherface, the skinny one, the very skinny one and the one with the red-hair soon enough.
Posted: 24th, September 2008 | In: Celebrities, Magazines, OK! | Comments (4) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Cosmopolitan Reveals The Secret Of Penetration And A Hand Job
FLICKING through Old Mr Anorak’s Cosmopolitan research magazine, we find: “Sex Tips from Guys - Their all-time favorite mattress moves, revealed.”
The talk turns to – and look away now – penetration.
As he says:
“For really exciting penetration have your man thrust his arm directly through your torso and kind of blend into your back.”
And smile…
Posted: 20th, September 2008 | In: Magazines, Photojournalism | Comments (10) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Snap, Bang, Wallop At Scott Maslen’s EastEnders-Themed Wedding
SCOTT Maslen’s wedding, and the stars have come out to shine, literally.
For just £2.00 HELLO! offers its readers a ready source of heat and light. One look at the sun-kissed faces of Scott’s EastEnders and The Bill co-stars and you feel as warm and snug as a jalapeno pepper up a camel’s bum.
“ALL the GUESTS,” says the cover page. “ALL THE GOSSIP.”
To Hertfordshire, where Scott is marrying Estelle Rubio, herself named after a star. They met nine years ago at 11 minutes past 11 on the 11 of August.
“They look as if they have stepped off the top of a wedding cake,” says Scott’s fellow EastEnders’ star Perry Fenwick.
We never do see the shoes and examine them for sings of frangipani, but our attention is moved by a sound from the toilets. The Sun takes up the tale:
“Scott’s pal was an usher but made a speech and it was filled with swear words. He called Scott a TV w****r and went on about their past.
Posted: 19th, September 2008 | In: Celebrities, Hello!, Magazines | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
Snap, Bang, Wallop At Scott Maslen’s EastEnders-Themed Wedding
SCOTT Maslen’s wedding, and the stars have come out to shine, literally.
For just £2.00 HELLO! offers its readers a ready source of heat and light. One look at the sun-kissed faces of Scott’s EastEnders and The Bill co-stars and you feel as warm and snug as a jalapeno pepper up a camel’s bum.
“ALL the GUESTS,” says the cover page. “ALL THE GOSSIP.”
To Hertfordshire, where Scott is marrying Estelle Rubio, herself named after a star. They met nine years ago at 11 minutes past 11 on the 11 of August.
“They look as if they have stepped off the top of a wedding cake,” says Scott’s fellow EastEnders’ star Perry Fenwick.
We never do see the shoes and examine them for sings of frangipani, but our attention is moved by a sound from the toilets. The Sun takes up the tale:
“Scott’s pal was an usher but made a speech and it was filled with swear words. He called Scott a TV w****r and went on about their past.
Posted: 19th, September 2008 | In: Celebrities, Hello!, Magazines | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0
- Madeleine McCann: The Story In Pictures
- Michael Jackson Dies Without His Nose On
- The Most Bizarre X-Ray Pictures
- Asda Puts Cock Soup On Top Shelf: 28 Smuttiest Foods Ever
- Hayden Panettiere Presents The World's Best Misspelled Tattoos
- The Real Story Of How Michael Jackson Died
- Michael Jackson Presents More World’s Best Misspelled Tattoos
- The Best Communist Russia Album Covers
- Cheryl on Americans Kill British Troops On Indepedence Day
- chenier on Barack Obama Hires Spazmo Stephen Hawkin’s Teleprompter
- yampster on Americans Kill British Troops On Indepedence Day
- Plenty O' Tool on Michael Jackson Wanted Muslim Burial
- chenier on Sarah Palin Presents The World’s Most Sexist Adverts
