The Chest Freezer

“EVERYONE’S been talking to me about my new Iceland advert.”

Kerry Katona is wrong. Not everyone has been talking to her, at least not directly. Her phone has been tied up, her emails a blur of activity, so we have been forced to shout.

“KERRY!” we yell in the general direction of her Warrington home. “YOUR ADVERT FOR FROZEN CHICKEN AND CHICKEN TWINSTICKS IS YOUR FINEST WORK TO DATE.”

It effortlessly surpasses her last advert for the purveyor of quality frozen chicken parts, the one where she holds a packet of chicken to her massive chest and asks some poor unfortunate: “Excuse me, have these breasts been enlarged?” He takes a look and answers, “I wouldn’t like to say, madam.”

“That’s why mums go to Iceland,” says Kerry knowginly. And if they haven’t yet been to the frozen aisles they should - all women should get a shelf-stacker to peer and then mock their beasts. Especially for those mums who want to be just like Kerry…

Posted: 10th, June 2006 | In: Media Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink