Britney Spears Dies On July 21
“BRITNEY DEAD IN 6 MONTHS!” announces the Enquirer.
Anyone wishing to buy tickets for Britney Spears’ tour in August would do well to save their money, or spend it on some Britney goods which will, after her demise, be worth something more.
The predictive Enquirer is dated January 21, which means Britney will die on July 21, 2008.
Perhaps Britney should be told, so as to put her affairs in order?
As for the date, is it auspicious? Channel 4 has yet to produce 100 Best July 21 Moments, the results of a popular survey, but if it does it will include:
1403 - Battle of Shrewsbury: King Henry IV of England defeats rebels to the north of the county town of Shropshire
1969 - Neil A. Armstrong and Edwin “Buzz” Aldrin become the first men to walk on the Moon
2005 - Four terrorist bombings, occurring exactly two weeks after the similar July 7 bombings, target London’s public transportation system
Events by date make unusual bedfellow, and added to the list will be the death of Britney Spears death. Perhaps Buzz Aldrin could comment on it?
Of course, Britney may not die, which could make the date no less memorable to the Enquirer which will publish “SHE’S ALIVE!” across its front pages and the news that Britney has comeback from the dead….
January 15th, 2008 at 4:17 pm
The first moonlandings were in 1969 not 1971
January 15th, 2008 at 4:40 pm
Six months from now is July 2008
Duh
January 15th, 2008 at 4:53 pm
She’s alive? And which moon landings?
January 15th, 2008 at 10:58 pm
Bastards. How can you write about someone’s death like that. I know its Satire, but dude..So not cool.
Karma will get you..Karma will bite you in the ass, give you septicemia and then you will die. An then Britney will spit on your grave.
January 16th, 2008 at 7:54 am
We do not comment on her death, rather on the tabloid press who feed on Spears
January 16th, 2008 at 3:23 pm
As justin timberlake said: what goes around…comes around….it bad enough to kick a ‘dog’ when its down….but to then try and rip its insides out is beyond cruel…..GET A LIFE DUDE AND LEAVE THE POOR GIRL ALONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
January 22nd, 2008 at 4:12 am
this is bad god will not like this and yall might go to hell if you dont ask for forgiveness
January 23rd, 2008 at 8:38 am
Just another day in this sick, sick world. GOD LOVES ALL!
January 23rd, 2008 at 10:40 am
I can’t believe this. How could anyone even think about predicting something like this about someone. I’m so appauld by this! Where is the positive people in this world? WWJD????????