Loch Ness Monster Killed By Global Warming
THE Loch Ness Monster is dead.
As the Daily Record reports, Nessie hunter Robert Rines is giving up his search for the monster after 37 years. The 85-year-old American will make one last trip in a bid to find the elusive beast.
As the paper says: “Despite having hundreds of sonar contacts over the years, the trail has since gone cold and Rines believes that Nessie may be dead, a victim of global warming.”
They say global warming killed Princess Diana…
February 15th, 2008 at 2:06 am
What about the Yeti?
February 15th, 2008 at 5:35 am
Visited Loch Ness in 70s. Group of locals said come quickly we have just seen Nessie.
Ran along beach with camera at ready, to group. I was short of breath. Oh, you just missed it they said. It was here yesterday. Did see ripples in the water though and a large log floating. Where it lives, global warming wouldn’t have any affect. Hope Mr Rines finds something down there.
February 15th, 2008 at 5:40 am
Anorak’s Abominable No Man was sighted yesterday.
February 15th, 2008 at 5:58 am
Plus. He may have been looking in the wrong place all along.
Loch Maree is a loch in Ross and Cromarty in the Northwest Highlands and north west of Loch Ness. At 20 kilometres long it is the fourth largest freshwater loch in Scotland. Its surface area is 28.6 square kilometres (11.0 square miles).
The waters of the loch were said to be curative. Immersion was said to be a cure for lunacy. (An unusual little extra for monster hunters then?)
The muc-sheilch pronounced “Mook Helluch” is said to be the remote loch’s monster it is often seen (allegedly) by fishermen and tourists.
There’s good trout fishing and a bit of monster hunter baiting.
There’s also no doubt it is THE most beautiful of all the Scottish fresh water lochs….so do not tell anyone. They’ll all want to be there.
February 15th, 2008 at 6:49 am
Aaaahhhh, that is so sad.
Sad that Nessie may be dead (!)
Sad that the legend will die off.
Sad that Robert Rines is giving up his search without finding her.
However, I’m pleased to see a mention of Diana… I thought maybe Al Fayed had fugging gagged you!
February 15th, 2008 at 7:03 am
Spokesperson for Scottish Tourist Board claims Nessie was abducted
February 15th, 2008 at 7:05 am
Nessie spotted in Lake Okanaga, B.C ???
February 15th, 2008 at 7:07 am
Breaking News …….
Metado3 to join search for Nessie.
February 15th, 2008 at 7:58 am
Loch Ness monster seen swimming off Morocco … with swarthy Gipsies, Tramps and Thieves.
February 15th, 2008 at 8:05 am
Probably been caught and eaten by the Pike-Eating Eastern Europeans who don’t understand our:
‘lets catch em, look at em and then throw em back to be caught again another day’ tradition of fishing!
IMO of course!
February 15th, 2008 at 8:53 am
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DuncanR Says:
February 15th, 2008 at 7:05 am
Nessie spotted in Lake Okanaga, B.C ???
*************
If so, it will be fighting/mating with the Okanagan Ogopogo!
February 15th, 2008 at 9:00 am
Actually, Loch Ness Monster was too much of a trouble for the Loch so he has been given to someplace that doesn’t have one and in the hope that this will generate much needed cash, and also available to buy are LochieNessyCats, washed and dried.