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Katie Price Topples Over, Barry George Lined Up For Alex Reid’s Rape Film

alex reid rape KATIE Price – Peter Andre Divorce: Alex Reid’s disabled rape movie, raped Katie Price’s fight night and stalker Barry George acts up…

Daily Mirror: “Jordan’s lover in new movie shame”

After the rape flick comes a “new movie nightmare” for Jordan’s Robbie Jackson look-alike lover Alex Reid.

Exclusive: New film starring Jordan’s lover Alex Reid features scene where a disabled woman is raped and murdered.

A home movie? A new anti-benefits cheat campaign by the Tories? No. It’s Killer Bitch, the straight-to-Out Patients film starring Alex Reid as Dean Gaffney’s look-alike. The Scene:

Office actress Julie Fernandez is to be dragged out of her wheelchair and assaulted by a character played by former football thug Jason Marriner. The source added: “This set-piece was on the cards from day one. Alex knew about it. It was scripted from the beginning and is one of the most violent pieces in the film, which takes some doing. Quite how Julie’s character is going to be raped and murdered is going to be sorted on the day and depends how far she wants to go.”

Do you see – it was “scripted from the beginning” but the actual scene has yet to be, er, sorted out?

Actress Julie has brittle bone disease, we learn. The guessing is that’s she won’t want to go that far. But the film looks to go further. What it lacks in script, plot, direction and acting talent it makes up for in sensation:

Spokesman Surjit Singh Clair “revealed producers are in talks with misfit Barry George, who was cleared of the murder of TV presenter Jill Dando, over a possible role in the movie.”

Perhaps George could play the film’s viewer peering through the goings on through fingers knitted over his face? Literally…

While Katie Price’s lover stars in dire film, the is more news:

Marie Claire: “Katie Price beaten up by gypsy fighters!

What?! Is she in the film, and all?

The Straits Times has more:

“Jordan pushed over at fight”

Was she pushed or did she – you know – topple over?

Much to debate. But it’s Metro that best sums up the scene at the aftershow party for the Extreme Brawl event in West London on Saturday.

“Jordan and Reid in ugly cage fight brawl”

Pictures everywhere.Or as the Mirror’s 3am Girls scream:

Jordan snubs her friends for night in with Alex Reid

Such are the facts…

Posted: 7th, September 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment


Jaycee Lee Dugard Stars On Dr Phil’s Show, Beats Oprah

jayceedugardaged1JAYCEE Lee Dugard – Anorak’s look at Jaycee Dugard in the news: Because we can’t work out what to make of Jaycee Lee Dugard’s kidnapping, the media hires experts. Sometimes these expert are so expert they become the media’s caring voice, like Dr Phil McGraw, former Oprah Winfrey sofa jockey and now got-it-alone nodding head:

So, Dr Phil, how is Jaycee Dugard, who was kidnapped at 11, raped, imprisoned and made to give birth to at least two of her captor’s children?

She is going to go through a cauldron of emotions.”

And what about Starlite and Angel Garrido, Dr Phil, how they doin’?

“What happened to these children when they got to the age when this man abducted her?”

Well, they weren’t abducted. Any ideas what they did get up to, Dr Phil?

“What we don’t know is if they have been sexually molested.”

We don’t. But they might. Ok, they were. And crying at the party.

Let’s spread the fear in the media:

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Posted: 4th, September 2009 | In: Key Posts, Reviews | Comments (2)


Madeleine McCann Spotted In Devon, Man Questioned By Police

mccann14MADELEINE McCann Watch: Anorak’s at-a-glance look at Madeleine McCann in the news – THE Media’s third summer of Madeleine McCann was stymied by Michael Jackson’s death, bad weather and Katie Price. Even Victoria Beckham could not reignite the craze. But then Jaycee Lee Dugard was found and, well, the papers made the link and this happened…

STUNNED Jon Hazlehurst and his eight-year-old stepdaughter were quizzed by cops after she was mistaken for Madeleine McCann. A member of the public raised the alarm when she spotted them at a petrol station and thought blonde Lauren was missing Maddie.

And… Is it here? The Sun says…

She jotted down Jon’s car details and dialled 999 and officers went straight to his home nearby in Kingsbridge, Devon. There they found his stepson Jack, 15, who gave them Jon’s mobile number and police told him to immediately report to the local nick.

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Posted: 4th, September 2009 | In: Key Posts, Madeleine McCann, Reviews | Comments (6)


DJ AM’s Funeral In Words And Pictures

dj-am2IN death so in life, the funeral service for DJ AM, aka Adam Goldstein, at the Hollywood Palladium featured a VIP entrance for the VIPs. In all, there were three entrances, one for family and VIPs and one for friends and one for fans.

Friends of the dead are not VIPs at the dead man’s funeral. Is your name on the list?

When someone young dies, there should always be a big crowd – for the young death still holds a macabre novelty, and the sheer number of survivors commands it.

And so they came to mourn: Nicole Richie, the ubiquitous Lindsay Lohan, sex tape-ologists Rebecca Gayhard, Eric Dane, Samantha Ronson, Robert Downey Jr., John Favreau, Nicky Hilton and John Mayer.

Not the dead John Mayer – the other one.

Says one onlooker:

“The crowd was very hip and eclectic, there were people dressed in smart black suits and people dressed in jeans and T-shirts. It was packed though, you could tell how well loved he was. It was a very sombre and sad crowd.”

Tautology is not dead. And while the sad and sombre mourners mourn, DJ AM’s girlfriend Haley Wood addresses the 3,500 faces.

“He was my soulmate and now he is my soul. He is my amazing grace.”

Pictures to follow…

Spotter: INO

Posted: 4th, September 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment (1)


All The Best Bits From Michael Jackson’s Funeral

Jackson Michael FuneralMICHAEL Jackson Funeral And Tribute Watch: Anorak’s at-a-glance look at Michael Jackson in the news – pictures from the funeral, fan’s name change, fans kept out and Jackson is King of Heaven…

MICHAEL Jackson’s has been buried. And the world’s media looks on:

WCSH6:

The funeral of Michael Jackson proved to be a scene of intimate sorrow for his loved ones… Jackson’s 11-year-old daughter Paris and her brothers, Prince Michael and Blanket, began the service by placing a bejeweled crown on their father’s golden casket. They were composed through most of the hour-and-a-half ceremony in Glendale, Calif.

Feel the intimacy. The Times senses privacy…

Although a pooled video feed of the arriving guests was made available by the Jackson family, it was cut off sharply as the proceedings began. Meanwhile, the Glendale police department had set up an exclusion zone outside Forest Lawn — enforced by uniformed and plainclothes officers — and the Federal Aviation Authority restricted all flights within a three-mile radius, to stop news helicopters from hovering overhead.

Nevertheless, flights above 3,000ft were allowed, and cable news channels, including CNN, broadcast silent footage taken from circling aircraft throughout the ceremony.

Daily Mirror: Michael Jackson funeral: All the details from inside the service as Jacko is laid to rest

In contrast to the star-studded public memorial event stages at LA’s Staples Centre, today’s funeral was a private affair.

The Jackson family did allow a live video feed of guests arriving… An airborne camera provided by LA broadcaster KTLA, however, continued to run. It showed a coffin covered in white flowers taken to the front of the congregation.

As for the burial, you can have one, if you can afford it:

Set in vast, landscaped grounds with gardens, sculptures, churches and fountains, Forest Lawn offers a range of funeral packages costing up to £7,880.

The Sun says it costs £100,000 to be buried like Jackson, which seems cheap. But where is Jackson? He’s in any one of 12 plots bought to keep the ghouls away; or got keep all his bits in:

The Sun: “Jacko to rest near Walt Disney”

MICHAEL Jackson will be buried today close to idols Walt Disney & one of Three Stooges.

Clues. For fans to follow:

660 News: “Sprinkling of hopeful fans show up for view of Michael Jackson funeral”

After the service was under way, the number of onlookers dwindled. Jesse Hudson remained on the sidewalk, singing along to “Thriller” on a boom box and clutching a Styrofoam tombstone he plastered with pictures of Jackson. He said he would stay there until the family drove away.

Touching stuff. But what of those who were there?

Mirror: “Others guests took to tweeting about the experience.”

Mr Al Sharpton wrote on his Twitter page: “What MJ went through was so unfair yet he succeeded. In the end, he was the biggest artist ever. He faced the headwinds but he made it.”

Well, blow me. No, don’t. Let’s keep things clean and respectful for the amn the tabloids called Wacko Jacko. You too Bubbles.

BBC: “Pop legend name change for woman”

A Warwickshire woman has changed her name to include ‘Michael Jackson’ in honour of the late pop legend. Marina Jane Michael Jackson, of Warwick, said she had been a life-long fan of the star and his death prompted her to take his name by deed poll. “I got divorced about six years ago and I have had my married name since, so I was looking at changing my name anyway,” she said.

She used to be called Marina Diana Spencer, allegedly.

LA Times: “Japan’s first lady has the vision thing – really”

It’s Venus Surfer Miyuki Hatoyama:

In Japan, she established herself as a “life composer” or lifestyle consultant who makes her own clothes, including a dress fashioned from hemp coffee bags. On the campaign trail, she demonstrated a passable Michael Jackson moon walk.

Michael Jackson – The Funeral in Pictures

Posted: 4th, September 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (7)


Jaycee Dugard: How The Media Spreads The Fear

Jaycee DugardJAYCEE Lee Dugard – Anorak’s look at Jaycee Dugard in the news: It’s every parent’s worst nightmare as Phillip Garrido rapes a 14-year-0ld, allegedly.

Before we go on with today’s round-up of Jaycee Dugard news in the media, hats off to the Washington Post’s Petula Dvorak for telling readers:

“Jaycee Lee Dugard’s Story is Every Parent’s Nightmare”

Because, kids and mums and dads, it could be you.

Dvorak writes that Dugard’s abduction in 1991 “changed my tiny California home town of South Lake Tahoe forever…Her reappearance last week at the age of 29 generated headlines across the country — a chilling reminder to me and millions of other parents that it can happen anywhere, to anyone.”

Look out! Paedo! But  – what’s this? – the kidnap and rape of a child by a stranger is not all that common?

It seems that no horror story is complete without a paedophile, the one thign that can make it still worse. Readers may recall the name Kristian Walker, 12, Swedish boy who the media told us had been kidnapped by a paedo after the Asian tsunami.

Kristian’s father said he feared the boy been taken by child traffickers after reports that he was seen leaving hospital with a European man.

It turned out that:

A German man sought in connection with the case has been cleared after police questioning. Police say they confirmed his account that he helped reunite two German boys with their parents, and a Swedish youth with his mother.

But while the good Samaritan did his work, the media did theirs:

NY Daily News: “PERVERTS ON PROWL”

The Guardian brought us:

Scotland Yard has set up a child protection unit as part of international efforts to combat the possible trafficking of children in the wake of the Indian Ocean earthquake, it emerged today.

So what are the facts?

Slate’s Christopher Beam: “800,000 Missing Kids? Really?Making sense of child abduction statistics. News reports cited a statistic that 800,000 children disappear every year—or about 2,000 a day. Seriously? How reliable are these numbers?…

Take the number 800,000: It’s true that 797,500 people under 18 were reported missing in a one-year period, according to a 2002 study. But of those cases, 203,900 were family abductions, 58,200 were nonfamily abductions, and only 115 were “stereotypical kidnappings,” defined in one study as “a nonfamily abduction perpetrated by a slight acquaintance or stranger in which a child is detained overnight, transported at least 50 miles, held for ransom or abducted with the intent to keep the child permanently, or killed.” Even these categories can be misleading: Overstaying a visit with a noncustodial parent, for example, could qualify as a family abduction. Some individuals get entered into the database multiple times after disappearing on different occasions, resulting in potentially misleading numbers.

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Posted: 4th, September 2009 | In: Key Posts, Reviews | Comments (2)


Jaycee Dugard: Picture Of Phillip Garrido’s Kidnap And Rape

garrido-rapeJAYCEE Lee Dugard – Anorak’s look at Jaycee Dugard in the news:  The tabloid battle to make Jaycee Lee Dugard’s ordeal worse moves on as Radar publishes details of “Philip Garrido’s Shocking Kidnap And Rape Police report” and pictures of him looking “menacing“.

Tautology is not dead.

The report outlines the night Garrido kidnapped, tortured and raped Katie Calloway Hall in Reno after she offered to give him a ride in her car. Hall has already been on the telly to speak of the heinous crime. And now Radar says:

A never before seen picture of a young Garrido is attached to the report. Clean shaven and long haired, a menacing looking Garrido stares straight out at the camera.

“Never seen before” is tabloidese for never before published in a tabloid newspaper. The picture has been seen before, chiefly by the person who took it.

As for being menacing, Garrido looks stoned, with David Cassidy’s hair, a pouty mouth and styling by Brian Eno. He gives his profession as “musician”.

Phillip Garrido doesn’t look menacing. Phillip Garrido – the peado rapist –  looks normal. And that is the really chilling part about it.

It’s the humanity, damn it.

Spotter: Radar

All pictures from Jaycee Lee Dugard’s case here

Posted: 3rd, September 2009 | In: Key Posts, Reviews | Comment


Video Of The 9/11 Non WWF Advert

wwf-9-11THE World Wildlife Fund did not endorse the advert of planes flying into New York and killing thousands of people. It reacted to the stills and the video with a statement, which you can read here.

That advert had nothing to do with the WWF. It was an outright denial. And then we get this:

Sergio Valente, president of DDB Brasil, said the ad was presented to the WWF in Brazil in December 2008 and approved; it then ran once in a small local paper.

“When I saw it, I said, ‘Stop running that ad,'” Mr. Valente said.

Can’t see the client liking that one, much. So we then get this apology, which is the good old fashioned non-denial denial:

After the WWF appeared to initially deny approving the ad, DDB Brasil and the WWF hammered out a statement posted in Portuguese on both groups’ Brazilian websites Wednesday afternoon apologizing for the ad and attributing it to “the inexperience of some professionals on both sides, and not bad faith or disrespect toward American suffering.

Indeed, it was made with the best intentions by professionals. No-one is to blame, but everyone is to praise. This is what ahppens when PR and advertisers collide. you get the trusth wrapped in layer upon layer of ambiguous, sugar-coated, 2-4-1 bilge.

But the best part is yet to come. You know who made the advert? Do you? Well, if you do please tell the agency:

A DDB Brasil spokesperson in Sao Paulo said a video version of the ad being circulated on the internet was not done or authorized by the agency or the client. She said DDB execs first saw the video, which features slightly different copy, on the internet and don’t know who created it.

Right now there are rogue agents, shadowy figures producing adverts. And they are every bit as terrible as the ones being produced by the pros. The WWF might not save face but it should save money…

Posted: 3rd, September 2009 | In: Key Posts, Reviews | Comment


Phillip Garrido And Jaycee Dugard’s Secret Sons Found

phillip-garrido-001JAYCEE Lee Dugard – Anorak’s look at Jaycee Dugard in the news: THE tabloid war to make the ordeal endured by Jaycee Dugard yet worse, moves on as the Sun wonders if Phillip Garrido killed Jaycee’s secret sons.

Did Garrido kill Jaycee’s sons?

With no phone numbers to call to vote “Yes” or “No”, there is nothing else for it but to review the evidence:

SEX monster Phillip Garrido may have had other children with kidnapped Jaycee Lee Dugard – and killed them if they were boys, cops said last night.

These would be the same sleuths who failed to spot Jaycee living in convicted paedophile rapist Phillip Garrido’s garden? Let’s hear from the experts:

Senior detective probing her kidnap, rape and imprisonment in California said: “It doesn’t make sense that a healthy young girl not on birth control only conceived twice in that time. She was raped continually and you would think there would be more babies.”

You would think that. But thankfully the law only has to deal with facts. So any boys, dead or alive?

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Posted: 3rd, September 2009 | In: Key Posts, Reviews | Comment


John Mayer Has Died, Jennifer Aniston Offers No Comment

john-mayerJOHN Mayer RIP. It’s the Summer of Death and musician John Mayer has died. John Mayer was involved in a road accident.

Anorak recalls that his album Indo-Jazz Suite was a hit. He won a scholarship to the Royal Academy of Music. Now he has died.

No. no. Noooooo. Not that John Mayer, former squeeze to Jennifer Aniston and signer of such hits as “I Touched Jennifer Aniston’s Hair”, “Jennifer Aniston & Me” and “Jennifer Aniston Revisited”.

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Posted: 3rd, September 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (7)


Jaycee Dugard: Rape Orgies, The Jaycee Dugard Barbie And Garrido Confesses

nancy-garridoJAYCEE Lee Dugard – Anorak’s look at Jaycee Dugard in the news: 140 perverts raped Jaycee, taking Madonna’s virginity, the Jaycee Dugard Barbie doll and Phillip Garrido confesses…

Daily Star: “Jaycee’s 140 local perverts.”

Jaycee Dugard lived in a “pervert’s paradise”.

Paradise for perverts is a dusty place in Antioch, California.

JAYCEE Lee Dugard was held captive for 18 years in a squalid neighbourhood crawling with paedophiles and rapists. Her kidnapper Phillip Garrido threw drunken orgies in his back yard and police suspect that local sex fiends took turns abusing Jaycee.

The contest to make this story even worse is being enjoyed by the Star.

More than 140 beasts are registered there after seeking refuge in the dreary, crime-ridden back- water following prison, as they could blend in there unnoticed… Detectives are now piecing together what happened to Jaycee and the two daughters Garrido fathered with her in captivity. Their fear now is that LSD junkie Garrido served up Jaycee like a piece of meat to his predator pals.

The fear is not the fact. The fear may even – get his – titillate the reader.

Polly White, 65, one of Garrido’s neighbours, said: “We found out there’s a predator living up the road and we were less worried about Garrido than the other one.’’

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Posted: 3rd, September 2009 | In: Key Posts, Reviews | Comments (4)


Katie Price’s Anti-Rape TV Show And Peter Andre’s Boast Card

katie-price12KATIE Price and Peter Andre’s Divorce: Katie Tops Country Life poll, shock on the rape shock, a new self-defence TV show and Dignified Peter sends a boast card from Marbella, with the kidzzzzz…

Following news in OK! that Katie Price was raped, comes news in OK! sister organ, the Daily Star of Peter Andre’s reaction.

Reading Northern & Shell news, which owns both titles, is akin to listening to a phone call from the space shuttle.

Monday (Jordan): I woz waped
Tuesday (Peter Andre): Shucks.
Wednesday (Jordan): Wearlly. Its me darkist seekwit.
Thursday (PA): Shucks. Raaaaaapeee isssss payyyyne / lyke dri-i-i-veeeeenggg raaaiiin…

The Star’s Gemma Wheatley is on the switchboard and turns to tell us:

Peter Andre is stunned by Jordan’s claims that she was raped ‘more than once’.

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Posted: 3rd, September 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (8)


Madeleine McCann: Watching Amelie And Sean Start School

find-maddyMADELEINE McCann Watch: Anorak’s at-a-glance look at Madeleine McCann in the news – We’re watching Our Maddie’s twin siblings Amelie and Sean go to school with Jaycee Dugard.

Sky News tells us: “Parents’ Pain As Twins Join Madeleine School”

All the media talks is of the McCanns’ pain: Pain. Pain. Pain.

We are not looking for the missing child, we are watching the parents, as ever. And we are watching the children. Nothing creepy about watching someone else’s children, a stranger’s children start school. This is just good wholesome gawping.

After “pain” the other word is “proud”. As all news sources tell us, Kate McCann and Gerry McCann are proud. This from Sky:

It will be a proud moment for her parents when they drop off twins Sean and Amelie for their first day in primary class in Thurmaston, Leics. But the occasion will be tinged with overwhelming sadness for the couple.

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Posted: 3rd, September 2009 | In: Key Posts, Madeleine McCann | Comments (5)


Sarah Palin Wanted To Pretend Bristol And Levi Johnston’s Son Was Hers

levi_johnston_vfLEVI Johnston, former almost lover to his baby mama Bristol Palin, is talking to Vanity Fair about his almost hockey mom-in-law Sarah Palin and how she wanted to pretend the child he fathered was hers.

Having made Sarah Palin a grandmother, Johnston now sticks the knife in over a five-page first-person account.

The Palins didn¹t have dinner together and they didn’t talk much as a family. Throughout the years I spent with them, when Sarah got home from her office–almost never later than five and sometimes as early as noon–she usually walked in the door, said hello, and then disappeared into her bedroom, where she would hang out. Sometimes she’d take an hour-long bath. Other times she sat on the living-room couch…watching house shows and wedding shows on TV. She always wanted things and she wanted other people to get them for her. If she wanted a movie, Bristol and I would go to the video store; if she wanted food, we’d get her something to eat, like a Crunchwrap Supreme from Taco Bell.

Oooo, he’s pulled out the Crunchwrap. That hurts.

She’d try to bribe everyone to clean the house, or give us guilt trips. She used to make Bristol feel bad by telling her that she did everything for her. This was unfair because, even before the campaign, Bristol was already the mom in the house, and she got tired of having to take care of her siblings.

Aspiring model Johnston – Vanity Fair shoots him in moody black and white as a sweetener to his pretensions – also speaks of divorce. Recently the Palins, Sarah and Todd, were embroiled in a divorce rumour. Says Johnston:

“There was a lot of talk of divorce in that house … times when Sarah and Todd would mention it and sound pretty serious.”

Johnston is 18. He was dating Bristol when he was 17. To sports jock Johnston hearing the alphabet said aloud is pretty serious.

“After the nomination, Sarah and Todd wouldn’t go anywhere together unless the cameras were out. They’re good on television, but once the cameras would leave they didn’t talk to each other. In all the time Bristol and I were together, I’ve never seen them sleep in the same bedroom…. Even during the Republican National Convention they slept in different bedrooms at opposite ends of her suite. Todd slept in the living room, on his little black recliner, with the TV going in the background—usually with the news or an Ultimate Fighting Championship match on—wearing clothes he wore that same day. [Since I used to sleep on the couch until Bristol got pregnant, I know he doesn’t snore, so that’s not why he wasn’t in bed]…. If Sarah and Todd did talk—they really don’t communicate at all—they were fighting. Todd is short-fused, and if you get him fired up, he flips out. He often got mad that Sarah wasn’t looking after the kids, and I’m sure she was mad he was riding [on his snow machine] all the time—but they really just weren’t clicking half the time.”

And the kids?

“Even before she was nominated, there wasn’t much parenting in that house,” says the man who helped turn Bristol Palin into a single mum.

“Sarah doesn’t cook, Todd doesn’t cook – the kids would do it all themselves: cook, clean, do the laundry, and get ready for school. Most of the time Bristol would help her youngest sister with her homework, and I’d barbecue chicken or steak on the grill.”

Johnston was Palin’s bitch? This is the kind of woman America should have had running the country, someone who can find a use for even the most feckless no mark. And while Levi was a-shaggin’ and a-grilling, he was also a–listenin’ to Sarah’s post-White House failure.

“Sarah was sad for a while. She walked around the house pouting. A week or two after she got back she started talking about how nice it would be to quit and write a book or do a show and make ‘triple the money.’ She would blatantly say, ‘I want to just take this money and quit being governor.'”

So says Johnston, whose fee for speaking to Vanity Fair is not revealed.

“She definitely thought she was running for president.”

But the biggest scoop is that the former governor of Alaska suggested that she and husband Todd could adopt her daughter’s baby and keep the real parentage a secret. Says Johnston:

“That way, she said, Bristol and I didn’t have to worry about anything. Sarah kept mentioning this plan. She was nagging – she wouldn’t give up. She would say, ‘So, are you gonna let me adopt him?’”

And so the conspiracy will begin. Trig Palin was really Bristol’s baby, went the narrative, and now two-wombs Sarah Palin had sniffed a way to repay the favour.

Of course, what Johnston does is do some Palin PR, preventing Sarah Plain from slipping down the radar like a piece of hairy soap down the plughole of life.

Rather than attacking Sarah Palin, Levi is supporting the family business. With Sarah Plain everyone has a use – even Levi Johnston…


Posted: 2nd, September 2009 | In: Key Posts, Politicians | Comment


Colonel Gaddafi And Megari Wear Lockerbie Kilts At 40th Anniversary Show, Pictures

gaddafi-keyLOCKERBIE: Did Gordon Brown sanction Abdelbaset Ali Mohmed al-Megrahi release and return to Libya in exchange for oil? And did a kilted Colonel Gaddafi thanks Scotland at his 40th anniversary do? Anorak looks back at Gaddafi’s life and at the current mess.

IN Libya, locals are celebrating Colonel Gaddafi’s celebration of 40 years in power. A video clip showing Megrahi stepping off a plane from Scotland to a hero’s welcome is played on a giant screen in Tripoli.

The British media is shocked that such an event should feature in Gaddafi’s anniversary celebrations. So what should be included?

Other highlights of Gaddafi’s 40 years in power:

1969 – A 27-year-old Gaddafi topples King Idris I in a farting contest, having eaten only falafal for seventeen days previously.

1974 – Gaddafi muses on which is the superior: a horsehair or palm leaf fly-swatter. Libya’s first democratic vote is curtailed when the palm leaf nails a huge blue bottle.

1977 – Gaddafi invented a system called the “Jamahiriya” or “state of the masses”, in which power is held by thousands of “peoples’ committees”, each answerable to the Supreme Committee, overseen by Colonel Gaddafi. The committees begin work on designing a new people’s horse, which comes to be known as a camel.

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Posted: 2nd, September 2009 | In: Key Posts, Politicians | Comment


Jaycee Lee Dugard Lived In Britain

jaycee-tabloid-bingoJAYCEE Lee Dugard – Anorak’s look at Jaycee Dugard in the news: With Baby P, Madeleine McCann, Shannon Matthews, 9/11, Afghanistan, War on Terror, Mumbai Massacre, the Asian tsunami and Sue Carroll…

Lest you think the story of Jaycee Dugard is not relevant to you, dear Britisher, that you are just gawping at suffering and sensation, Sue Carroll sets you straight, and engages in a rich game of Tabolid Bingo. See how many stories you can spot being linked to Our Jaycee:

Daily Mirror: “Who’s to say there isn’t a Jaycee Lee Dugard in Britain?”

How ironic that during Jaycee’s incarceration the world has witnessed terrorist atrocities, disasters and war but missed completely the cruelty inflicted on an innocent little girl locked away in a paedophile’s suburban backyard.

9/11. Mumbai. Tsunami. Iraq. Bing…. Wait for it. Sue Carroll has more:

We know enough about the death of Baby P to recognise no stone must be left unturned when a child’s life is in question.

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Posted: 2nd, September 2009 | In: Key Posts, Reviews | Comment


Raped Katie Price Keeps Her Head High And Her Arse Higher

7619345KATIE Price tells OK! magazine readers that she has been raped. The revelation is on the magazine’s cover: “I’VE BEEN RAPED.”

“THE MUM OF THREE FINALLY REVEALS HER DARKEST SECRET.”

And so you know what to make of someone being raped, OK! tells you that it’s “HEARTBREAKING”.

Inside and Lisa Byrne is already analysing the effect the rapes have had on Katie Price:

“This probably explains a lot about Katie’s psyche – and why she is so tough and carries on through a crisis with her head held high.”

And her arse held higher.

And then comes a health warning, as Lisa Byrne turns OK! into a social service organ and publishes the number for Rape Crisis.

Katie’s rape is big news:

The Sun (front page): “Jordan: My Rape Ordeal”

Daily Mirror (front page): “I was raped says Jordan”

Daily Star (front page): “I’ve been raped”

Daily Express (front page): “I was raped more than once says Katie Price”

OK! tells us that when Katie Piece was six she was sexually assaulted, licked in the park by a man who offered her an ice-cream.

In her OK! Agony Aunt columns, Katie makes her shock rape ‘n’ tell in light of news that her current lover, Alex Reid, is playing a rapist in a film called Killer Bitch:

“Rape is a subject very close to my heart. I was raped when I was younger, more than once… Someone who was close to Alex was also raped and he is as horrified as I am by these claims.”

So it’s not a rape film, then? Which would explain why on the film’s website, the following boasts/ warnings are featured prominently:

* “A vile and degrading hardcore porn movie.” (Perth Now, Australia)

* “Exploitation film… torture-porn… modern horror” (Irish Independent)

* “Vile and degrading… sickening footage… scenes too vile to describe… unsavoury, shocking and unsuitable movie.” (News of the World)

* “Violent, aggressive… icky stuff” (TheHollywoodGossip.com)

Katie then tells us that Alex is in a “different league” to her former shag partner Andre Pinto, who told his shag ‘n’ tell to the tabloids.

As for the rapists, well no names are named. But Katie Price’s victim status has been established.

Posted: 2nd, September 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (9)


Jaycee Lee Dugard: Orgies, Starlite And Angel Abused And Secret Sex Palace

jaycee-garridos1JAYCEE Lee Dugard – Anorak’s look at Jaycee Dugard in the news – Starlite and Angel abused by TV, Christine Murphy’s orgies predated Nancy Garrido, Phillip Garrido rapes Katie Callaway Halland and money for sex…

The press continue to specuatioe and salivate over Jaycee Dugard and Phillip and Nancy Garrido.

The Sun: “Their minds are blank”

THE two daughters Jaycee Lee Dugard had with twisted kidnapper Phillip Garrido know nothing about the outside world, The Sun can reveal. Starlite, 15, and Angel, 11, were “starved of information” by evil Garrido for years, say cops.

These are the girls we’ve seen at a party and who knew their neighbours? their minds were blank?

A senior officer in California said last night: “They are both intelligent kids but they are very naive about the real world. They have never watched TV and have no concept of maths, geography and history or anything outside their town of Antioch.”

According to the Sun not watching TV is a form of child abuse. You want to hear more of their horrors? Can you stand it?

The detective said: “They are being given TV microwave dinners and their favourite meat loaf meals. They have never had fizzy drinks so they get cooled water, which is what they are used to.”

Foodies will not know how to react – TV dinners (bad) but no fizzy drinks (good). Just what to make of the Garridos?

OC Register: “Friend says kidnap victim’s daughters are ‘normal'”

Jaycee Lee Dugard’s two children attended a 16th birthday party of a friend two weeks ago and appeared and behaved like normal kids, a business customer of Phillip Garrido told several media outlets today.

Cheyvonne Molino, a client of Garrido’s home-operated business, Printing for Less, said Dugard’s daughters – Starlet, 15, and Angel, 11 – were polite at the birthday party for Molino’s daughter, and are fans of the TV show “Hannah Montana.”

You want more facts?

Daily Telegraph: “Jaycee Lee Dugard: Philip Garrido’s first wife claims he had sick sex fantasies”

What, the man who served time for rape and kidnap and then kidnapped a child before raping her and giveng her two children was not right in the head? And what about the sexual fantasises? Tells us the details, for research purposes, natch.

Philip Garrido’s first wife has claimed he beat her, stabbed her in the face and begged her to take part in orgies. Christine Murphy met Garrido in high school and was just 19 and working in a casino in Reno, Nevada when they eloped and got married in 1973. She described how he then allegedly took LSD every day and became violent when she refused to play out his sexual fantasies.

Says Christine Murphy on the telly:

“Multiple partners is what he wanted, I wouldn’t go for that. “I was always looking for a way to get away. He’s a monster.”

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Posted: 2nd, September 2009 | In: Key Posts, Reviews | Comments (8)


Michael Jackson Tribute: Profonol Peter Doherty Duets With Mariah Carey

jackson-tapeMICHAEL Jackson Tribute Watch: Anorak’s at-a-glance look at Michael Jackson in the news – Profonol Pete Doherty’s Tribute, Jackson rached out to R Kelly, Mariah Carey regrets not being the star of the funeral and a ghost in the tape…

Pete Doherty is to perform a tribute to Michael Jackson.

Smack and crack are old news. Propofol is in. A stars needs a signature drug. Doheryt hasd dabbled but he has never achieved the telling epithet, such as Cocaine Kate, his former lover Kate Moss did, nor the King Of Prop. Michael Jackson.

Also, Doherty will appear on the David Gest.. My Life! A Musical Concert Extravaganza show at the HMV Apollo in Hammersmith, west London. Gest made up one part of that picture of Liza Minnelli, Jackson and Liz Taylor, the one in which all four appear to be melting.

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Posted: 1st, September 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment


Demi Moore Helps Rumer Willis Think Her Way To Bigger Breasts

demi-moore-71SAYS Rumer Willis, daughter to as-nature-intended Demi Moore and Bruce Willis, to Glamour magazine:

I haven’t inherited my mother’s body.”

Well, not yet. But give it time, Rumer, and you may well get the body and the attachment.

But what’s this? Of course, Demi Moore says her body has never been under the knife. She has had no cosmetic surgery. Demi Moore – a name we believed to be the product of nominative determinism – achieved those breasts by the power of her mind.

And you too can, Rumer.

But first begin small. Start by gazing at your navel. And watch as it magically transforms into a neat upturned nose, smooth thighs, raised cheekbones, great hair and breasts that no earthquake can shake.

You just need to believe…

A Pictorial Guide – NSFW:

Posted: 1st, September 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (4)


Jaycee Dugard Pictures: Phillip Garrido’s Rape Van Caught On Google Maps

phillip-garrido-vanJAYCEE Lee Dugard – Anorak’s look at Jaycee Dugard in the news – Pictures of Phillip and Nancy Garrido’s home and van on Google Maps.

“Did Google Maps hold the key that could have freed Jaycee?” asks Asher Moses.

If only police had logged on to Google Maps, they might have uncovered Phillip Garrido’s pedophilia den earlier.

If only… They might

A Google Maps search for 1554 Walnut Avenue, Antioch, CA reveals the Garrido home.

Google wants to film everything. Xeni Jadin zooms in:

Google maps view of van that has just departed 1554 Walnut Avenue, Antioch, CA, the home of sex offender Phillip Garrido. Was this Garrido’s van, following the Google vehicle with camera gear on top? I don’t know.

Neither do we. The Creepy Google Van Vs the Creepy Garrido Van. Who wins?  But from the images we can get an idea of where the house sits.

As for Google saving humanity from the worst of humanity… Well, corporate spy vehicles is a step in the wrong direction. Putting your faith in technology and Big Brother never work.

All news starts at the local level.

Pictures below – and all the picures here.

Posted: 1st, September 2009 | In: Key Posts, Reviews | Comment


Jaycee Dugard’s Secret Emails, In Pictures

1712614JAYCEE Lee Dugard – Anorak’s look at Jaycee Dugard in the news: Nancy Garrido And Phillip Garrido’s wedding photographs, a bone found, Jaycee’s secret emails and brainwashed by rape…

Sky News: “Jaycee Police Find Bone At House Next Door”

Police investigating the kidnap of Jaycee Lee Dugard have found a bone at the property next door to the home of her alleged abductor.

A skull. Bet it’s a skull… A hooker’s skull…

It was too early to tell whether the piece of bone was animal or human, sheriff’s department spokesman Jimmy Lee said.

Be still, armchair detectives and ghoul spotters…

Former customers of Garrido’s printing business say they are not surprised.

Carla Kirkland told Sky News: “When I drove up and he met me out on the road I thought it was a strange area that has no real communication. I don’t want to say it’s a bad area, I just thought it was the perfect place for what he did.”

Do you see? Sky says lots of sex attackers live in the area, but names none, nor tells viewers how many.

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Posted: 1st, September 2009 | In: Key Posts, Reviews | Comments (8)


Jaycee Garrido Pictures: Starlite And Angel Cry

jaycee-lee-dugard-pictures2JAYCEE Lee Dugard – Anorak’s look at Jaycee Dugard in the news: Jaycee, Starlite Garrido and Angel Garrido all cried when police burst in and arrested Phillip Garrido and Nancy Garrido and took them away.

Picture Gallery

Sky News has more on the sensation:

Jaycee Lee Dugard and the two children she shared with Phillip Garrido, Starlite and Angel, cried when the arrest was made.

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Posted: 31st, August 2009 | In: Key Posts, Reviews | Comment


Michael Jackson: Sperm Parties, Macaulay Culkin And A Secret Heart Attack

macaulay_culkin_michael_jacksonMICHAEL Jackson Watch: Anorak’s at-a-glance look at Michael Jackson in the news – Macaulay Culkin’s sperm, Wacked Off Jackson’s celebrity milking machine, Jackson’s secret heart attack and the FBI…

Michael Jackson is now less Wacko Jacko as he is Wacked Off Jackson, the man who went about harvesting his friends’ sperm, singing to them to keep their produce tip-top quality and reminding them that more than two crotch grabs is a donation.

Mark Lester has already told us about his time on the Jacksons milking machine, and we have read of Jackson’s own desperming. Now we are invited to see Macaulay Culkin hooked up to the Jackson milk-o-matic.

The Sun: “Home Alone Culkin ‘is dad of Blanket’”

ACTOR Macaulay Culkin is the mystery dad of Michael Jackson’s son Blanket, it was claimed last night.

Blanket. Pubescent sperm. Did Jackson play a team of scrapologists to process the Neverland bedding? The King of…Pop?

The Home Alone film star is said to have donated sperm to help Jacko create his seven-year-old offspring – real name Prince Michael II – with an unknown surrogate mum.

One source said: “It is well known Jackson and Macaulay shared a unique bond. Now rumours are spreading like wildfire that Macaulay, who Jackson nicknamed Mack, is actually Blanket’s biological dad.”

Rumours mentioned. Rumours spread. And minds turn to those Jackson did not milk.

* Did Jackson equip Uri Geller with a soup soon and a copy of the Carrs of Sheffield catalogue?

* Did Elizabeth Taylor show Jackson her vials filled with the essences of husbands’ past?

* Did Jackson’s kin supply sperm, and would it explain La Toya Jackson’s wide-eyed expression?

* Is David Gest fit for purpose?

* Did Bubbles spank the monkey?

No word yet from Culkin nor anyone else. Still, rumours and all that.  In other Jackson Five news:

Daily Mirror: “Michael Jackson’s heart attack was ‘kept secret’, claims singer’s friend

Dr Steven Hoefflin, a friend of the singer, revealed the latest twist after speaking to medics involved in Jackson’s case. He confirmed: “They say he had lividity, which means his blood had already sunk to the back of his body.”

Which means Michael Jackson’s body was on was back to front?

“This indicates Michael’s heart had stopped hours earlier.”

What other facts?

Forensic pathologist Dr Cyril Wecht, not involved in the Jackson case, said: “If someone carried the body from one room to another, the livor would be ‘broken’ where contact with the body was made.”

If…

“If one person held his ankles and the other held him under his arms, there would be corresponding white interruptions of livor mortis in those spots.

If…

Retired FBI special agent Ted Gunderson, who has independently monitored the case, said the new evidence pointed to a “massive cover-up” by Murray.

Independently monitored the case – as in, read the newspapers and watched telly…

He asked: “Did Murray try to fool people into thinking Jackson died on the way to hospital in the hope an autopsy could be avoided?”

Dunno. What say you, detective?

If so, it didn’t work, which is why he had to confess to administering Propofol.” Murray, 56, denies mistreating Jackson.

If…

Michael Jackson – Rest in Pieces…

Michael Jackson Homicide: Wacked Off Jacko Donated Sperm

Posted: 31st, August 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (4)


Madonna, Demi Moore, Ashton Kutcher And Justin Timberlake Arrive For Israel Summit

7555253Madonna, Demi Moore, Ashton Kutcher And Justin Timberlake Arrive For Israel Summit.

MADONNA is coming to Israel. And there’s nothing Israel can do about it.

The Material Girl went from wanting to be ‘as famous as God’ in the Eighties to wanting to reach God through Kabbalah, and to save both planet Earth and the black babies who wander on it, in the Noughties.

Israel’s Prime Minister Binyamin Netanyahu and opposition leader Tzipi Livni will both meet Madonna. But the fear is that she can not be stopped.

Madonna wants to perform at Tel Aviv’s Park Hayarkon, on Tuesday and Wednesday night.

Before that she’ll meet the politicos. Can they dissuade her?

Even before that Madonna’s in Jerusalem’s Old City, touring an ancient tunnel near the Western Wall. We watched her go in. We waited. Men prayed. Later she emerged.

Madonna will tour graves of Talmudic sages in Safed and attend a Kabbalah Centre ritual with Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore. The Jerusalem Post says another “Kabbalah-related celebrity friend”, Justin Timberlake, is on his way to the scene.

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Posted: 31st, August 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment (1)