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Key Posts | Anorak - Part 3

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Class War: Royal family pheasant killer ‘attacked’ local ‘peasant’

sun pheasant peasant

The Sun leads with Patrick Panks, 43, who claims he was hit in the head and called a “peasant” by a gamekeeper on the Royal Family’s Sandringham estate. Mr Panks say a shoot was blocking the road. He complained (‘I say my good man, I’m in terrible dash. Will you be long?’, or words to the that effect). Mr Panks says the gamekeeper then hit him “several times”, causing lacerations to his head. Nasty stuff. But it’s only front-page news because Sandringham is newsworthy. We’re told the alleged incident occurred two days after Prince Philip’s prang, aka the “horror smash“. So there are two more pages of the plebs verses the ruling class.

Over pages 4 and 5, we hear the gamekeeper allegedly bellow: “Mind my dogs you fucking peasant.” The man then allegedly attacked Mr Panks, who responded: “I kept saying, ‘There’s no need for this.'” Mr Panks says the incident was an episode of “disgusting snobbery”. He was caught in the crosshairs of what he terms an “us and them culture”. Then the Sun’s bomb: “Prince Andrew is said to have been shooting on the day of the bust-up.”

The Royal Family aren’t all commemorative china cups, thimbles and faces on stamps. They’re a clique of guns, dead animals, lots of land, mastery of the handshake and more guns. It’s only in death that we get too glimpse the real them, and then only after the official biographies have doused the corpse’s remains in a gossamer weave of heroic deeds, terrific fashion nouse and hearts bursting with a purity of spirt that reaches the divine. So was it feckless Andy wielding the stick? Unlikely. The effort involved alone would rule him out. What about Phil? The Suns says he was “once the Royal Family’s keenest shot. But he is now only an observer during shoots.” He might not spot a nippy hatchback – but never misses a game bird.

Posted: 22nd, January 2019 | In: Key Posts, News, Royal Family, Tabloids | Comment


Tabloids put up reward after statues to War heroes sprayed with paint

Daily Star paint states war
Daily Star

Who tossed white paint over four statues: one commemorating Bomber Command; another of Sir Winston Churchill and Franklin D Roosevelt; a third to the Real Marines; and one to Canada’s fallen? All the damaged statues are in London. Paint was used – the Mirror identifies it as “white gloss”. Too early to blame East European labourers, pretty much the only people doing manual work in the capital?

The Daily Star, which once cheered for the EDL and might well have rounded up the usual suspects, is offering a £5,000 reward to “nail the vile yobs”. The Star want to “find the scum”. These “brainless scumbags”. These “idiots”. These “sick thugs”. If you know who did it – and your info leads to prosecutions and conditions – the Star will give your five grand. The Sun makes the same offer – £5,000 for a successful prosecution.

the sun war memorial paint
The Sun

The Express hears from Squadron Leader ‘Johnny’ Johnson, 97, the last man standing from the 1943 Dambusters raids. The Express says the attack must have been premeditated. It says a group of anarchists are the likely culprits. TV’s Carole Voderman, an ambassador for the Royal Air Force Air Cadets, is upset. “I am deeply upset,” she says.

EDL star

The paper reminds us that the Bomber Command Memorial has been targeted before. In 2013, someone wrote “Islam” on it in big red letters. A week after that, someone else, with access to more paint, wrote “EDL”, “Fuck the police” and “Lee Rigby’s killers should hang”. No mention of that in the Star.

Posted: 22nd, January 2019 | In: Key Posts, Tabloids | Comment


Police use pikes to stop knife crime

Rob Beschizza shares this video of police in Asia using pikes to cut down on knife crime. Meanwhile…in the UK:

Spotter: BB, Reddit

Posted: 22nd, January 2019 | In: Key Posts, Strange But True | Comment


Emma Fairweather and me: Her Majesty The Queen extends ‘warmest thoughts’ at arms length to car crash victim

Emma Fairweather prince car

The Daily Mirror’s interview with Emma Fairweather, the woman injured in a collision with a car driven by Prince Philip, continues to make front-page headlines. Much to the tabloids’ disappointment, Fairweather doesn’t resemble Princess Diana in any way, other than her being female and a single mum. No word, then, from Mohamed Al-Fayed, just the relayed news that Her Majesty the Queen has sent “a message of concern” to 46-year-old Emma. The Duke of Edinburgh has not made contact, the paper says.

How nice and proper of the Queen to apologise for her husband’s prang. She always says the right thing, although most people come away from meeting with her unable to recall a word she uttered. She is the master of saying nothing. So what did she say this time? Nothing. The Mirror tells us: “The Queen has sent her warmest good wishes to Emma Fairweather, who broke her wrist in the collision, via her trusted lady-in-waiting.”

To rephrase: Queen details flunky to apologise. How touching. How very normal and in touch with the common folk. So much for the collision now billed as “Prince Philip’s horror car smash”. And so much for Republicanism. We live in an age where the monarchy is accepted without question. Just cop a load of this utter tosh in the Mirror. Miss Mary Morrison, 81, the aforesaid lady-in-waiting “left her a voicemail message”. Yeah. She didn’t even call back when Emma was free. The message trills: “Hello, I’m ringing from Sandringham House. The Queen has asked me to telephone you to pass on her warmest good wishes following the accident and Her Majesty is very eager to know how you are and hope that everything is going as well as can be expected.”

Eager enough to pop over or leave contact details for Emma to reply at her own convenience. The message continues: “We’re all thinking of you very much at Sandringham and I’ll try you at a later date. Unfortunately I’ve got to go out quite shortly but I hope all is well as can be expected for you. Thank you very much indeed. Goodbye.”

Lest you think that such aloofness exacerbates the matter, a “senior palace source” arrives to opine: “It is of huge significance the Queen chose Mary Morrison to make the contact. Mary is a close friend of the Queen and Her Majesty values her counsel immensely.”

So there you have it. Next time you’re in a car accident, don’t bother leaving your details in person or exchanging insurance details. Just get one of your spouse’s chums, preferably one on the payroll and well-rewarded for her servitude, to speak on your behalf.

Such fun!

Posted: 21st, January 2019 | In: Key Posts, News, Royal Family | Comment


Ant McPartlin: Britain’s Got Talent seeks new role model

Ant Mcpartlin

Having heard Ant McPartlin hook up with the sympathetic Sun to trail the new season of Britain’s Got Talent as part of the star’s rehab programme, more papers lead with the celebrity who in less PR-driven times could be termed a love rat, troubled and drink-drive maniac.

The Express, Sun and Metro all lead not with Ant’s new partner, the rock-like Anne–Marie, rather Dec, the second part of the presenter’s double act. Dec was “angry” when Ant as arrested for drink-driving (Sun). Dec is laughing now he’s back on the telly with Ant (Metro). Ant is terrified that Holly Willoughby, who stepped in to present I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out of Here! will replace him. She may even be more liked by the public, what with her being vivacious, witty, not shagging her partner’s now former PA, not driving drunk into a car carrying a couple and their young child, and not taking drugs. Willoughby was a stop up in evolutionary terms.

Ant’s rehabilitation is all well and good – and good for him for finding a blonde fossil on which to build an empire. But this is surely about Simon Cowell, without whom Britain would be virtually talent free. What should have happened is that this series was made all about the presenters, a talent show for who can partner Dec or replace him and Ant entirely. If you’ve a dying granny, are a single dad with hair on the list of UNESCO sites of special scientific interest and/ or once shagged the aforesaid Cowell and are looking for a return favour, get in touch. Criminal records and failed blood tests are no barrier. Cowell missed a trick.

Posted: 21st, January 2019 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts, News, Tabloids | Comment


Prince Philip and me: what Duke did and didn’t say to car crash victim

Prince Philip car crash victim

Prince Philip should travel by horse and buggy, or make better use of the family’s gold coach. But he’s sticking with the 4×4, picking one for a jaunt days after being involved in an accident near his Sandringham home. The “victim” of the accident is “single mother” and “royal fan” Emma Fairweather. She’s speaking in public for the first time about her ordeal. And thanks to the People, Express and Mirror sharing one owner, all three Sunday tabloids lead with her words.

“I still haven’t had any contact from the Royal household. Maybe he should prioritise that over test driving his new car,” says Emma. She feels “ignored and rejected” by the duke and the Queen after Thursday’s smash. Is Emma our Deuce of Hearts, suffering, as the Princess of Hearts did after a run-in with the Royals? The Windsors have a chequered history when it comes to cars and crashes. The Express, which has long been at the forefront of Royal car crash reporting, picks a side:

Emma will spend her 46th birthday today on painkillers with her arm in a cast after being left with a broken wrist when the Duke’s 4×4 ploughed into the Kia that Emma, her 28-year-old friend and her friend’s baby were travelling in, flipping his car just outside the Sandringham estate on Thursday afternoon.

Daily Express diana

Having heard a “friend” say someone could have died, Emma adds: “I feel like the impact of what has happened has been minimised because my injuries aren’t as minor as they are being made out to be.” Where there’s blame, there’s a claim. “She claims she was urged by a police officer not to speak publicly about the crash.” Consider that urge ignored.

Emma continues: “I was advised not to speak to anyone and told to expect a call from the Palace yesterday. I know the Queen is a busy lady but I was really excited at the idea she might phone me. Instead, I got a call from a police family liaison officer. The message he passed on didn’t even make sense. He said, ‘The Queen and the Duke of Edinburgh would like to be remembered to you.”

What a wonderfully snotty and arcane phrase. But at 97, the Prince’s time is valuable. How much he has left is measured in weeks and maybe months. He’s no time to waste on platitudes. Speak to the insurers. Although we were robbed, of course, of what could well have been a memorable exchange. The Prince is synonymous with “gaffes”, which nearly always are just his attempt to lighten the mood and put his audience at ease. What price the Prince saying, “I’ve not had an accident since Paris”, “Women drivers!” or “I thought you were a pheasant”?

Posted: 20th, January 2019 | In: Key Posts, News, Royal Family | Comment


How to appear trustworthy

blushing - (Gerard van Honthorst’s Smiling Girl, a Courtesan, Holding an Obscene Image, 1625, via Wikimedia Commons)

Do we trust others too much? Are we confident that the government is able to accomplish what it set out to accomplish, whatever that is (insert guess here and post it to Westminster). What about robots, do we trust them?In 2014, researchers at University of Wisconsin-Madison investigated what makes a humanoid robot seem more “alive.” They found that a firm, steady gaze was unsettling. Bots programmed to occasionally glance away and look around appeared more thoughtful and thus more trustworthy.

Sathnam Sanghera writes in the Times onheart surgeon Samer Nashef:

People have an instinctive inclination to venerate medical professionals, literally handing over their lives to them without question, when these people are as capable of error as anyone else. As Nashef explains at length in his excellent book The Naked Surgeon, patients operated on the day before a surgeon goes on holiday are twice as likely to die as those operated on the first day the surgeon returns from holiday; one surgeon can appear, statistically, to be a better surgeon than another although they have killed more patients, owing to a strange phenomenon called “category shift”; and choosing a surgeon with the lowest patient mortality rate could be a mistake because they could just be taking on fewer risky patients.

Nashef writes how a heart surgeon “day after day walks into an operating theatre, nonchalantly cracks open the chest, puts the patient on an artificial heart-lung machine, stops the heart, opens it, fixes it, starts it again, disconnects the patient from the heart-lung machine and expects that the heart will handle supporting life again”. We trust them.

You don’t need to study medicine for years or work in high finance to gain trust. You can cheat. You can rouge your cheeks and sit beneath a hot light:

The Dutch psychologist Corine Dijk gave volunteers a series of photos of people, some blushing and some not, accompanied by tales of their recent mishaps, ranging from appearing overdressed at a party to farting in a lift. The blushers were judged more favorably, despite their indiscretion.

Other research has found that if you blush people are more likely to forgive you, and it can even avert a conflict. When you’re trying to work out who to trust, it makes sense to choose the people who would feel guilty if they did anything wrong. The ideal person is someone who would blush and give themselves away.

Image: Gerard van Honthorst’s Smiling Girl, a Courtesan, Holding an Obscene Image, 1625.

Posted: 18th, January 2019 | In: Key Posts, News, Technology | Comment


The CIA emergency tool kit spies hid inside their rectums

Old spies never die- but they do pass interesting stools. Atlas Obscura shows us the emergency spy kit CIA operatives in the Cold War stored in their rectums:

This CIA-issued tool kit was issued to CIA officers during the height of the Cold War. It was a way for spies to get themselves out of sticky situations: to pick a lock, carve a tunnel, etc. Watch the video above to learn more about the tool kit from historian and curator of the International Spy Museum, Dr. Vince Houghton.

Anyone else miss the Cold War?

Spotter: Boing Boing

Posted: 17th, January 2019 | In: Key Posts, Strange But True, Technology | Comment


Brexit: Newspapers and Gove slaughter Corbyn, aka Mr Plan B

Brexit corbyn Express

One day after the Meaningful Vote and the newspapers are going for Jeremy Corbyn, aka Plan B:

_105214346_i17-jan

Picture 1 of 8

Leading Brexiteeer and Tory MP Michael Gove ticks off Corbyn’s faults – well some of them:

The cross party talks to reach a Brexit deal so far: Labour won’t talk to the Tories; the Tories will only listen to the DUP; the Lib Dems want to do it all over again with a 2nd referendum; and the SNP want the UK to stay in the Union so it can, er, best leave the Union. Such are the facts.

Posted: 17th, January 2019 | In: Broadsheets, Key Posts, News, Tabloids | Comment


Daily Telegraph subs confuse Jemima Khan with Jemima Lewis

Jemima Lewis is the Daily Telegraph’s radio critic and columnist. Jemima Khan isn’t. The Daily Telegraph is no longer sub-edited in house. Not that you’d notice…

Posted: 16th, January 2019 | In: Broadsheets, Celebrities, Key Posts, News | Comment


MPs lose Brexit: the newspaper front pages slam May

Brexit the sun May dodo

This is what happens when Parliament fails to embrace the result of the 2016 EU referendum. Last night, Remain-voting Prime Minister Theresa May had her Brexit deal voted down by a Remain-voting Parliament (around 75% of MPs want us to remain in the UE; 52% of voters don’t). Her plan was rolled in concrete and tossed into the canal: 432 against to 202 votes for her hotchpotch. No worries thought, right? The UK will leave the EU on March 29. Probably…

Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn has tabled a vote of no confidence in the government. MPs will vote on tonight. May is expected to win it. The 118 Toris who voted down her plan will pick her over Corbyn in a game of blind man’s bluff.

brexit star

Picture 1 of 11

Away from the EU’s umbrella, our MPs are exposed and , boy, are they found wanting. Danny Baker nailed the mess:

Meanwhile the airwaves and TV studios are packed with nodding heads and over-trained politicos telling a supine media what’s what. As the Queen Mum was wont to say: ‘Such fun!’

Posted: 16th, January 2019 | In: Key Posts, News, Politicians | Comment


Woman can only hear female voices and Michael Jackson

ear deaf

To China – I said, ‘To China!’ – where a woman says she can’t hear male voices. Either that or she has trouble detecting lower frequencies. LiveScience has more:

At the hospital, Chen was treated by Dr. Lin Xiaoqing — a woman — who noted that while Chen was able to hear Xiaoqing’s voice, she couldn’t hear the voice of a nearby male patient “at all,” according to Newsweek. Xiaoqing diagnosed Chen with reverse-slope hearing loss, a rare type of low-frequency hearing loss that likely impaired her ability to hear deep male voices….

Loss of hearing of lower-pitched sounds (which is what Chen experienced) is… less common because the bass-processing portion of the cochlea — a snail-shaped structure deep in the inner ear — is very well protected, said Jackie Clark, a clinical professor with the School of Behavioral and Brain Sciences at the University of Texas at Dallas, who also wasn’t involved with Chen’s case…

“Most studies have shown that if you catch it within 48 hours, you have the best chance for recovery,” (Clark) said.

What was that? ‘Pass the grapes… Pass. The. Grapes. ‘Eh?” says Chen popping the last one into her mouth.

Posted: 16th, January 2019 | In: Key Posts, News, Strange But True | Comment


Owen Jones v The Sun is the joke that keeps on giving

Guardian journalist and Jeremy Corbyn fan Owen Jones is so upset that he allowed the Sun to feature an extract from his book that he’s donated £500 to the Hillsborough Justice Campaign. The Sun lied when 96 innocent people were killed at a football match in 1989. You can read more about it here. A mere 23 years after the lies, the Sun apologised.

Jones won’t forgive the paper. “I’ve made the argument that the British media is directly responsible for legitimising and fuelling the rise of the far right. The hatred directed, on a daily basis, against Muslims, migrants, refugees, LGBTQ people, and other minorities, has had already horrifying real world consequences: worse is to come,” he writes in a story headlined: “Why writing for The Sun is bad (and my own making amends).”

But not all British media is to blame. The Guardian, for instance, which admitted that a cartoon”inevitably” echoed “past antisemitic usage of such imagery” is fine. As Julie Burchill put it as she left the Guardian for the Times, which like the Sun is owned by Rupert Murdoch, she’d “finally been convinced that my evil populist philistinism has no place in a publication read by so many all-round, top-drawer plaster saints”. That’s the Guardian, in which one columnist opined: “I have developed a habit when confronted by letters to the editor in support of the Israeli government to look at the signature to see if the writer has a Jewish name. If so, I tend not to read it.” Jones has also written for the New Statesman, the organ that produced this fair and reasoned cover:

anti-Semitic new statesman kosher conspiracy
The Labour Party supporting New Statesman had a question that might have been rhetorical.

Jones adds: “It is the proprietors and editors who bear the greatest responsibility for this media campaign of hatred. But the journalists who write such stories have to be held to account, too. The idea that building their own careers is more important than not helping to whip up bigotry and hatred against already vulnerable minorities is perverse. They may think it’s a price worth paying to “make it”, but the price is not paid by them — it’s paid by other people in the streets, in school yards, in workplaces and in communities.” Sun writers should look to themselves and consider their positions.

Jones says that his refusal to accept a fee from the Sun doesn’t make it right. He was “naive”. “Giving them any copy whatsoever just legitimises the paper.”

As Jones is invited to hand back any earnings from the Guardian and the New Statesman – if he keeps up his rate of a £500 donation per article, he might earn an OBE for charity work – Guardian columnist Hadley Freeman muses on twitter:

The “established MP” who earned money from the Iranian government-funded satellite channel Press TV, is Jeremy Corbyn. One writer says “Press TV is not just a home for those with exterminationist fantasies about wiping Israel off the map, but a platform for the full fascist conspiracy theory of supernatural Jewish power.” Iran backs Corbyn’s “friends” in Hamas, the group whose stated aim is to kill every Jew. Jones wants us to make Corbyn the country’s Prime Minister. Maybe Corbyn didn’t notice the racism. He might also have missed the fact that Iran hangs gay people, stones women to death and wants to annihilate the world’s only Jewish state.

But it’s the Sun that shames Jones. For pity!

Posted: 15th, January 2019 | In: Key Posts, News, Politicians | Comment


Supermac beats Big Mac in stodge wars

Supermac McDonald's

In Ireland you can eat at one of Pat McDonagh’s Supermac fast-food eateries. McDonagh earned the nickname Supermac for his showing in a Gaelic football match in the late 1960s between his school Carmelite college of Moate, County Westmeath, and St Gerald’s.

A Supermac burger is not to be confused with a McDonald’s burger. The US fast-food giant sought to block the Supermac brand over intellectual property right matters. McDonald’s argued that Supermac would create confusion on the high street, causing punters looking for a cheap meaty sandwich to mistakenly buy a, er, cheap meaty sandwich.

Mega Mac
Huge Mac

Supermac won the day. The European Union Intellectual Property Office (EUIPO) cancelled McDonald’s use of the “Big Mac” trademark. Supermac is now free to sell its grub throughout the EU. “We said there’d be no confusion. Big Mac and Supermac are two different things,” said McDonagh, 65. Indeed they are: one is Big and one is Super. The race for the burger with the biggest superlative is on.

Posted: 15th, January 2019 | In: Key Posts, News | Comment


Publicly shaming the McDonald’s Brixton ranter

To the McDonald’s in Brixton, south London, where Alex Parvenu is filming a middle-aged man barking on about migrants and feminists.

He moans about “bloody immigrants” and – now to camera – “mangina feminists”. Parvenu wants to know who he is. Why? Well, in his tweeted video he tagged MPs, Lambeth Council and police. The assumption is that Parvenue wants the berk nicked in some official capacity. But surely his public shaming is enough?

By now others had noticed the ranter. Keen for a spot of the online action, someone filmed him again. This time the bellend’s in the street:

Lest you consider the ravings of a dickhead of negligible interest to the world at large, an incident that could be dealt with by on-the-spot ridicule, the Independent transcribes the man’s words. “The London McDonald’s racist somehow managed to get even more racist,” says the website’s headline. Well, yes. If you egg on an odious cretin shouting at the pigeons in the precinct, chances are that he’ll shout some more. But isn’t the better thing to call him a “****”. Why film it? We know what the man says about things and himself – none of it’s good. And maybe he’s mentally unwell, a little tired and emotional?

But there’s something else going on: what does filming it and demanding action say about us? Was anyone afraid by this man and this ravings? Do we no longer possess the agency to combat ugly words ourselves, preferring to cede retribution and justice to others? It’s all very now and all very odd.

Posted: 15th, January 2019 | In: Key Posts, News | Comment


Gymnastics: UCLA’s Katelyn Ohashi scores a perfect 10 plus

Katelyn Ohashi

Sport can make you gasp. The floor performance by 21-year-old UCLA gymnast Katelyn Ohashi is spectacular. Watch out for the eye-watering splits bounce at the 1:25 mark.

Uproxx has more:

Katelyn Ohashi is about to become a household name. The 21-year-old UCLA gymnast wowed spectators with an absolutely flawless routine at the Anaheim Arena over the weekend, which subsequently went viral when the UCLA Gymnastics ‏Twitter account tweeted video after her performance. Gymnastics ‏Twitter account tweeted video after her performance. “A 10 isn’t enough for this floor routine by Katelyn Ohashi,” the tweet correctly expressed.

Posted: 15th, January 2019 | In: Key Posts, Sports | Comment


Bros find success in failure – 1980s band enjoy fame after documentary ridicule

 Bros: After The Screaming Stops

The answer to the stuttering refrain “When will I, will I be famous?” was simple: when you’re shaggable, have pop star hair and write a catchy tune the promoters love. Now Bros, who asked the question in 1987, have triggered a new answer to it: when nostalgia bites and you become the nation’s pet thickos. And so it is that after a documentary brought them to back to the fore, Surrey-born Matt and Luke Goss – the other part of the original Bros band, Craig Logan, is busy – have announced they will be performing a comeback show in London.

For those of you missed the Decembeer 2017 BBC documentary Bros: After The Screaming Stops, here are a few choice cuts:

Bros quotes funny
Bros documentary quotes funny
Bros documentary quotes funny

The lovely irony is that the documentary followed twins Matt and Luke as they reunited ahead of their ill-fated 2017 tour. Showing us failure has resulted in success.

And you too can be famous – just as soon as “you’ve read Karl Marx
/ And you’ve taught yourself to dance.”

Posted: 14th, January 2019 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts, Music, News, TV & Radio | Comment


Brexit: Boris Johnson makes lusty return to the 30s

Boris Johnson’s Brexit plans are on hold. The Mail leads with news that “Boris’s blonde” is at the couple’s new “love nest”. ‘Boris’s blonde what?’, you may well ask? His mullet? His merkin? His visions for Europe? No. The blonde is the Tory MP’s “first Lady” Carrie Symonds.

Boris Johnson blonde daily mail

Inside and the paper’s headline is full of facts and guff: “Boris’s ‘First Lady’: As Johnson’s blonde, 30, steps out of £1m flat they share, we reveal how she’s already nicknamed ‘FLOTUS’ – like president’s wife – and also shares passion for raw ambition with ‘puppy dog’ Boris, 54.” He’s ‘Boris’ no fewer than twice; she is “Johnson’s blonde” – not even a blonde in her own right, rather the property of the Tory manqué.

Boris Johnson symonds

Like the Mail, the Express also leads with Boris and whatsherface. The papers talk of her pinching his arse; much canoodling; some smooching; and a cosy new pad.

And finally, it would seem, readers would do well heed the Johnson’s advice: stay in bed until Brexit is done. Oh, and there are the ages, of course, of which no report on the love birds is complete. He’s 54; she’s 30. Yeah, that’s right, Remainers. The Brexiteer really has gone back to the 30s and she’s getting aroused by the 50s.

You’ve never had it so good (nor so often – phwoarr!).

Posted: 14th, January 2019 | In: Key Posts, News, Politicians, Tabloids | Comment


Teen Vogue beats CIA and other perverts: stick a plaster over your webcam

How can you prevent spooks and pervs from spying on you? Nicole Kobie has a tip for reader to Teen Vogue: stick a plaster over your Webcam.

However, there are others who could be watching through your webcam, and the stories of compromised cameras are genuinely terrifying: hackers taunting people and spying on women at home, blackmailing teens into sharing nude photos, and schools even keeping watch on their students. “This is a pretty invasive, targeted form of malware, but the consequences can be super embarrassing,” said Joseph Lorenzo Hall, chief technologist at the Center for Democracy and Technology.

Such attacks require your computer to be tunneled into by hackers, creating a backdoor called a Remote Access Tool (RAT) — sort of like if someone added an unlocked window to your house that you didn’t know was there. There are also cases that allege computer repair staff taking control of cameras when you get a device serviced.

Don’t panic; this type of attack remains rare, notes Wheeler. “One or two instances of RATs and teenagers being hacked for video through their webcams creates a lot of media clicks and hysteria, but the truth is that you should be much more concerned about your personal data than your webcam or your phone’s front-facing camera (which no one covers with a sticker).”

Nicole Kobie

Now take a look at that Alexa box sat in the corner of your room listening to everything, and the Facebook Page that when it remains open can see all other sites you link to and maybe listen to your phone calls. And wonder what it is about adults that makes them so keen to eavesdrop on you? What did they hear? What did you do?

“With the right tools, in other words, almost anyone—from foreign governments to the creepy teenager down the street—could be recording you while you sit at your computer. All of this raises the question: Why don’t we just cover our webcams whenever they aren’t in use?”

Slate

Felix Krause explains what happens when you allow an app access to your camera and microphone. The app could obtain:

  • Access both the front and the back camera.
  • Record you at any time the app is in the foreground.
  • Take pictures and videos without telling you.
  • Upload the pictures and videos without telling you.
  • Upload the pictures/videos it takes immediately.
  • Run real-time face recognition to detect facial features or expressions.
  • Livestream the camera on to the internet.
  • Detect if the user is on their phone alone, or watching together with a second person.
  • Upload random frames of the video stream to your web service and run a proper face recognition software which can find existing photos of you on the internet and create a 3D model based on your face.

Criminals beware! This video shows how a film makers set up his phone and waited for it to be stolen. He then spied on the thief. But if you’re doing nothing wrong, then there’s nothing to worry about, right? Or maybe Big Government and Big Corp. are just gathering data for ads and marketing. However, should any rules change and you become a person of interest, they’ll be in touch. In the meanwhile, get a sticking plaster. It’s not a total solution – but it’s an easy fix.


Posted: 14th, January 2019 | In: Key Posts, News, Technology | Comment


Arsenal Transfer Balls: Ramsey agrees to disagree with Juventus

Ramsey

The Sun told us that today Arsenal midfielder Aaron Ramsey was taking his Juventus medical. He’d already agreed to join the Italian side in June on a free transfer. The BBC, Sky Sports and Guardian agreed. Ramsey to Juventus was a done deal. And so to today’s news – the day of the Ramsey’s MoT – and the Sun tells readers that nothing has been agreed. Cancel the knee tapper:

the sun ramsey juventus

The pick of today’s transfer balls being the inverted commas around his “medical today”. It was the Sun that told us: “The Wales international has already agreed a five-year deal to move to Juventus in the summer once his current contract expires, and will undergo a medical at the club today.”

the sun ramsey juventus

The Standard told us that no deal had been done:

Aaron Ramsey

So what is it? Has Ramsey signed a deal or not? He can’t have agreed to join for nothing in June, be keeping his options open and heading to a club other than Juventus in January?

Posted: 13th, January 2019 | In: Arsenal, Back pages, Key Posts, Sports | Comment


Jeremy Corbyn completes his EastEnders audition

Jeremy Corbyn shirty Marr

Jeremy Corbyn is on Andrew Marr’s Sunday morning politics show. If body language matters – and surely it does – the Labour leader’s habit of tilting his head and looking up does him few favours.

In 2008, actor Chris Coghill was hired to play Tony King on EastEnders. His character would become one of the most reviled in the history of British soap operas. How did he manage to look shifty and disingenuous. Coghill explained: “I’ve always been able to turn on the sinister look. Sid Owen said to me that all I had to do was tilt my head down and look up and it’s there.”

Jeremy Corbyn says vote for him and he’ll let you know what his Brexit plans are.

Posted: 13th, January 2019 | In: Key Posts, News, Politicians, TV & Radio | Comment


The Rock v The Daily Star – actor says tabloid fabricated interview

The Rock daily star snowflakes

Did you see The Rock ruck into millennials for being “snowflakes” and “PC softies”? The Star made it front-page news. Well, The Rock (aka Dwayne Johnson) claims the paper made the whole thing up. “It’s not a real [The Rock] interview if I’m ever insulting a group, a generation, or anyone because that’s not me, that’s not who I am, and that’s not what we do,” says Dwayne.

Anyone now looking for the story on the paper’s website is met by an apology:

DAily Star the rock

What happened? Are there two Rocks – and is the Star caught between them?

Posted: 12th, January 2019 | In: Key Posts, News, Tabloids | Comment


Army gives Sergeant Glyn Gurner lost medals on his 100th birthday

Many happy returns Sergeant Glyn Gurner. Mr Gunner is 100 years old today. To mark the date, the British Army presented him with a gift: the medals he lost 70 years ago.

Mr Gurner – the British Army’s tweet refers to Mr Gurner by the more nominative deterministic title Mr Gunner – of New Tredegar, Caerphilly, joined the Royal Welch Fusiliers in 1936 and served for 10 years. He served in Crete, North Africa, Italy and Palestine. He said: “This is unbelievable. I never expected anything like this. What a wonderful thing to do. I can’t believe I’ve got my medals back.”

Picture of Sergeant Glyn Gurner (Right) taken in 1940 – Photographer: Corporal Tom Evans (RLC) / MoD Crown

Posted: 12th, January 2019 | In: Key Posts, News | Comment


Mesut Ozil look alike Daniel Kaye jailed for DoS attack on African internet

Ozil DAniel Kaye
Ozil Kaye

Daniel Kaye, 29, admitted attacking Lonestar, an African phone company, in 2016 – accidentally crashing Liberia’s internet. The Briton was this week jailed for 32 months. Anorak can’t help but notice that Kaye looks a lot like Arsenal FC’s Mesut Ozil. Can the pair be related?

According to court papers, Kaye was hired in 2015 to attack Lonestar, Liberia’s leading mobile phone and internet company, by an individual working for Cellcom, its competitor.There is no suggestion that Cellcom knew what the employee was doing – but the individual offered Kaye up to $10,000 (£7,800) a month to use his skills to do as much as possible to destroy Lonestar’s service and reputation.

BBC

Kaye harnessed the power of the Internet of Things to carry out a DOS attack:


How Kaye did it is of no little interest. It’s all about the Internet of things.
The weapon, known as “Mirai #14” worked by secretly hijacking a vast number of Chinese-made Dahua webcams, which are used for security in homes and businesses around the world. He identified that the cheap cameras and other similar equipment had a security flaw – and he exploited that to take over the devices without owners knowing. That meant he could turn them into what amounted to a “zombie” cyber army to attack his target. In November 2016, working secretly out of Cyprus and controlling the botnet via his mobile phone, Kaye ordered it to overwhelm Lonestar’s systems.

On his command, hundreds of thousands of the webcams began firing data requests at the west African company. The system began to struggle to manage the demands and parts of the infrastructure crashed.

Mesut Ozil is injured and has never hacked anything – indeed, he rarely tackles anything harder than a sponge.

Posted: 12th, January 2019 | In: Arsenal, Key Posts, News | Comment