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Key Posts | Anorak - Part 40

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The greatest local news photo ever” woman ‘put off men and sausages for life’

THE greatest local news photo of all time featured on the Get Reading website in 2009.

Beneath the headline “Naked neighbour ‘put me off men’“, Anna Roberts told of Denise Woodage (yep, really), who had been “put off men and sausages for life”, having seen “garden pervert Paul Darlow… pleasuring himself in his back garden in Churchwood Walk, Calcot, and frequently spotted him going about his chores naked – save for a pair of boots.”

Darlow was jailed. Mrs Woodage was upset. And the world got the photograph that once seen cannot be forgotten…

Posted: 6th, September 2012 | In: Key Posts, News | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Naomi Wolf gets slaughtered on Mumsnet (best and worst comments)

NAOMI Wolf has been chatting about her new book Vagina – A New Biography to the women on Mumsnet. Wolf has made a connection between brain and vagina. She might have also made a link between brains and arse.

Wolf says things like:

“Some people have a lower baseline autonomic nervous system and in lovemaking, something that heightens it like spanking or hair-pulling or some scenario that is threatening – as long as you are in control – that heightens some women’s autonomic nervous system, and in turn heightens their arousal and their orgasm.”

“When you understand that, it’s much less alarming.”

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Posted: 6th, September 2012 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (4) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Richmond Magazine editor Richard Nye says ‘the only good cyclist is a dead one’

RICHARD Nye, editor of Middlesex listing organ The Richmond Magazine, writes: “…as a daily driver on busy roads, I tend towards the temperate view that the only good cyclist is a dead one.”

The Richmond Magazine contains a half-page display advert from Moore’s Cycles. Will they continue to advertise?

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Posted: 6th, September 2012 | In: Key Posts, News | Comments (4) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Coroner implicates Call of Duty in Teenager’s suicide

THE inquest into the death of Callum Jordan Green, 14, is a bit odd. The teenager from Stockport took his own life.

The Manchester Evening News looks at the words of Coroner John Pollard. The paper notes that before he died, Callum Green had played Call of Duty. The MEN says that the Coroner “did not blame the game for the fact that Callum, of Keston Crescent, Brinnington, Stockport, hanged himself”.

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Posted: 6th, September 2012 | In: Key Posts, News | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


So, Michael Jackson was a hopeless drunk was he?

EVERYONE pretty much thought of Michael Jackson as a troubled child trapped inside a troubled genius’ body. For a period, he was pretty much untouchable and then, in later life, pretty much in a state where no-one really wanted to touch him unless it was absolutely necessary.

However, the childlike quality remained and you could picture him, floating around his house like Peter Pan (only with a frightening face). You certainly couldn’t imagine him indulging in adult activities like jerking off or getting hammered.

Concerning the latter, that seems to be the case as someone has said that MJ was a hopeless drunk.

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Posted: 5th, September 2012 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Lance Armstrong: Edgar Allan Poe, The Troll’s revenge and what Betsy Andreu saw

LANCE Armstrong is likely to feature a lot in the Times. The seven-times Tour de France winner has decided not to contest doping charges against him. The man who got rich on the back of those successes will not fight for his integrity. Armstrong has been stripped of those Tour titles and every every other result he had achieved since 1998.

In 1999, the Sunday Times went for Armstrong. David Walsh wrote:

“For too long, sportswriting has been unrestrained cheerleading, suspending legitimate doubts and settling for stories of sporting heroism.”

In 2001, Walsh told Sunday Times readers that Armstrong had worked with Italian doctor Michele Ferrari. The story was called Champ of Cheat? The paper had a question: “why would a clean rider work with a dirty doctor?”

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Posted: 5th, September 2012 | In: Key Posts, Sports | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


The horrific Miss Glitz Sparkle puts Lincolnshire on the global map

LOOK out Honey Boo (see left), the British are coming. Ocean Orrey is the four-year-old voted “Most Beautiful” in the toddler and under-12 beauty Miss Glitz Sparkle pageant staged at the Pride of Lincoln Hotel.

We don’t hear enough of Lincolnshire on the news cycle, do we? Outsiders wonder what goes on there. A place that spawns Margaret Thatcher, The Acid Bath Murderer John George Haigh and Ocean must be worth a look. Maybe it’s the lack of exposure on the international stage that has resulted in Ocean being called Ocean and not North Sea or Spurn Head. And then there are her two brothers, the 18-month-old twins Milan and Madrid.

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Posted: 4th, September 2012 | In: Key Posts, News | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


The most pampered pets who travel by jet, gold coach and handbag

SOME people might wonder what kind of person would pay upwards of a thousand pounds for a short flight – and then spend the same amount again to allow their dog to in the set in the seats next to them. Answer: the kind of people who fly with the Victor jet charter company (founded by Clive Jackson, pictured above), which has just launched the service.

Not that there’s anything new about pampered pets of course…

JJ

Speaking of flying, when airlines refused to allow Mariah Carey’s Jack Russell to travel in first class, she had him chauffeur-driven in her own car instead.

Tinkerbell

When not in Paris Hilton’s handbag, this tiny chihuahua resides in the $325,000 dog house at her home in Beverly Hills.

Bubbles

Michael Jackson’s chimpanzee lived cheek by jowl with his in-no-way-peculiar owner, as celebrated in various tasteless jokes at the time. They wore the same clothes and Bibbles had his own bodyguard. Home is now in an animal sanctuary in California.

Royal corgis

Not only is their food is prepared by the royal chefs, but it is claimed that the Queen prepares each one a stocking at Christmas.

Max

George Clooney’s Vietnamese pot-bellied pig lived in his Hollywood Hills mansion for many years until his death. He was said to have caused the break-up of several relationship, because Clooney refused to put him outside.

Posted: 3rd, September 2012 | In: Flashback, Key Posts | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Why are we siding with the armed vigilantes of Welby?

ANDY Ferrie and his wife Tracey Ferrie live in a cottage in deepest Leicestershire. The Sun says he is 35 and she is 43. Two men have been shot there. The men – the victims? – were part of a gang of four intruders. Two people have been arrested and held on suspicion of GBH. Four men aged 27, 23, 31 and 33 have been arrested on suspicion of aggravated burglary.

The Indy reports:

The man and his wife were disturbed by the break-in in the Welby area of Leicestershire, near Melton Mowbray, in the early hours of yesterday morning. It is understood he grabbed a shotgun, which was legally owned, and shot two of the four intruders before calling police. The man, 35, and his 43-year-old wife were arrested in Melton on suspicion of causing grievous bodily harm. Neither suffered any injuries during the incident.

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Posted: 3rd, September 2012 | In: Key Posts, News | Comments (4) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Was Risha Mashir framed by Islamist bigots: Pakistan’s anti-human blasphemy laws

RISHA Mashir is 11. Other reports say she is 14. She’s a Christian girl living in Umara Jaffar, Pakistan. If that were not hard enough, Risha Mashir has Downs Syndrome. She’s an easy target. And she’s under arrest, alleged to have burned pages from an Arabic textbook which contained passages from the Koran. Risha Mashir is in Adiala Jail, a prison in Rawalpindi. Is a court finds her guilty of blasphemy, Risha Mashir will be sentenced to life imprisonment.

Under the law, section 295c of the country’s penal code, those accused of blaspheming against the Prophet Mohammed may be sentenced to death or life imprisonment. They are fined in addition.

Was she framed?

Risha’s plight began when someone reported seeing her carrying a shopping bag. They said she threw it away. They said that inside the bag were ten partially-burned pages of the Noorani Qaida, a primer for pupils studying Arabic and the Koran.

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Posted: 2nd, September 2012 | In: Key Posts, News | Comments (3) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


The most ridiculous rap lyrics

RIDICULOUS Rap lyrics:

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Posted: 2nd, September 2012 | In: Key Posts, Music | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Mitcham landlord seeks tenant “not from India, Africa or Pakistan”: racism in action

THE advert in the window of Bineet Newsagent’s on Upper Green East, Mitcham, advertises a room for rent. The offer is open to anyone who is not from “India, Pakistan, Africa and Etc.” The room is only available to “clean” East Europeans who are “hard working”.So says the advert in the window of a shop owned by Asians. Business is business – the advert pulls in £1 for a one week display. The shop’s owners are not bothered by it.

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Posted: 1st, September 2012 | In: Key Posts, News | Comments (3) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Ana Amemiya is the half-human half-anime model (photos)

THIS is Ana Amemiya, a 22-year-old Japanese glamour model who always wears a cartoon head. (Think Frank Sidebottom’s wayward sister.)  Ana is the half-human half-anime idol. A bikini-clad mo-del wearing a big man-made head? It’s been before, but not to cheaply. Forget Jordan and all the comstic surgery. Papier-mâché is the future:

anna-amemiya-9

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Posted: 31st, August 2012 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


A history of bystanders injured watching sports (videos)

THE tragic death of a German athletics referee this week – speared through the throat with a javelin – was a terrible and highly unusual accident. Yet he was by no means the first unfortunate bystander to find himself in precisely the wrong place at precisely the wrong time…

When Yorkshire’s Jacques Rudolph threw a routine ball back to his bowler in a Twenty20 match against Lancashire last May, he joined an exclusive club of bird-killing cricketers…

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Posted: 30th, August 2012 | In: Flashback, Key Posts, Sports | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Motivational animal photos (with tree support group)

ARE you motivated? Are you in touch with your inner penguin? Phil Lucas, motivational gnu guru, has been collating images of how animals can inspire humankind. (The thoughts of the tree are not know.)

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Posted: 30th, August 2012 | In: Key Posts, The Consumer | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Exposed: Citizen Khan and the Daily Mail’s anti-Muslim bias

THE Daily Mail never misses the chance to attack the BBC. Today, Paul Revoir write of a new BBC sit-com beneath the headline:

BBC accused of insulting Muslims with new sitcom Citizen Khan as 200 complain about first episode

Revoir notes:

It was probably unlikely that a TV comedy series about a Muslim community leader would pass without comment.

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Posted: 29th, August 2012 | In: Key Posts, News | Comments (10) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Sarah Palin to model her campaign on 50 Shades of Lisa Ann

SARAH Palin has been the victim of everyday sexism. Sarah Palin was the victim of misogyny,  spazmo Barack Obama’s pitbull in lipstick, the woman who breeds retards.

At the Republican National Convention in Tampa, porn star Lisa Ann – she played Serra Paylin in corporate porn flick Who’s Nailin’ Paylin? – has been hired to perform a GOP-styled strip show at Thee DollHouse adult club.

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Posted: 29th, August 2012 | In: Key Posts, Politicians | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


School makes deaf Hunter Spanje change sign name because it looks like a gun

TO Nebraska, where 3-year-old Hunter Spanjer – he’s deaf – has been asked by the school to alter his sign language name because the experts think the gestures looks like he’s shooting a gun.

Hunter Spanjer’s sign violates the Grand Island Public Schools weapons policy.

Says Hunter’s father, Brian Spanjer:

“He’s deaf, and his name sign, they say, is a violation of their weapons policy. “It’s a symbol. It’s an actual sign, a registered sign, through (Signing Exact English).”

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Posted: 28th, August 2012 | In: Key Posts, Strange But True | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Sun hack Matt Bendoris writes interview in drool: Nicola Benedetti might worry

GOOD journalism is about show and not tell. Mindful of that, let’s meet Matt Bendoris, the Scottish Sun’s scribe interviewing “Scots violin queen Nicola Benedetti”. The story seems to have been written entirely in drool:

STUNNING violinist Nicola Benedetti becomes as tightly strung as a Stradivarius when pop babe Rihanna’s name crops up. I must have hit a bum note after asking why the sexy Scot doesn’t make more of her fabulous figure — when she suddenly flies off on one.

Nicola fumes…

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Posted: 28th, August 2012 | In: Key Posts, News | Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


The Bic Pen Just For Women – the funniest reviews

THE Bic Cristal Biro for her – “Easy Glide — feel the smoothness” – is the pen that keeps on giving. On Amazon, reviews have been enlightening:

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Posted: 28th, August 2012 | In: Key Posts, The Consumer | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


The best policeman grinding photos at the Notting Hill Carnival

ONE key aspect of the Noting Hill carnival is dancers dry humping – winding and grinding – uniformed police officers. The dancers are lithesome and sexed up. The police are stiff and helpless. We’ve compiled a gallery of the best photos of the secret policeman and policewoman’s ball. Truncheons are officers’ own:

14387747

Picture 1 of 27

Police with performers during the Notting Hill Carnival, London. PRESS ASSOCIATION Photo. Picture date: Monday August 27, 2012. See PA story SOCIAL Carnival. Photo credit should read: Lewis Whyld/PA Wire

Posted: 27th, August 2012 | In: Key Posts, News | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Should there be a dangerous cat act? Mary Bale was right

NEVER trust a cat. Nora Scott, 80, from Tunstall, Staffordshire, says a neighbour’s cat attacked her. Was Mary Bale right. She was the women who dropped a cat into a state-of-the-art wheelie-bin, turning Lola into Top Cat, every cat’s TV hero. It might have been what Lola wanted. Cats, after all, can control human brains. Mary Bale became the leader of the Mary Bale Fan Club.

Now we read that cats are attacking us:

“I am terrified of this cat. It clawed my face and I had to go to the hospital and get antibiotics. I have spoken to the police, but they say there is nothing they can do. I think there should be a new law, because they have one for dangerous dogs. It just jumped up and clawed all down my face. There was blood everywhere and it left me with a black eye. Now I am too scared to go out, in case it comes after me.”

“Until something is done, then I will have to remain in my house. I used to love pottering about in the garden. I used to grow lovely flowers but I had to cut them all down so I could see whether the cat was hiding there.

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Posted: 25th, August 2012 | In: Key Posts, Strange But True | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Read the leaked police documents about the arrest of Julian Assange

WE know how Julian Assange will be arrested. The British police will not press the fire alarm at the Ecuadorean embassy in London nor will they lure the WikiLeaks founder out with scraps of conspiracy theory and girls. Thanks to a Metropolitan Police, we can read the plans.

The paper reads:  “Assange to be arrested in all circumstances … he comes out with diplomatic officials, in diplomatic bag, in diplomatic vehicle.

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Posted: 24th, August 2012 | In: Key Posts, News | Comments (3) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


The funniest video ever

MAN v sliding door is the funniest video you will ever see:

Posted: 23rd, August 2012 | In: Anorak TV, Key Posts | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Oral sex and unsafe sex are good for your mental health, says Daily Mail

WHEN Eddie Wren told us and Daily Mail readers “Semen is ‘good for women’s health and helps fight depression'”, we grabbed a jug of Fear Factor donkey semen and read more about the healing brain juice:

Oral sex is good for women’s health and makes you feel happier, according to a study which studied the effects of semen’s ‘mood-altering chemicals’.

Not just semen. But swallowing semen as a result of oral sex. Got that? Maybe rapists – for whom the news keeps geting better - an administer the stuff on the national health?

To investigate whether semen has antidepressant effects, the authors rounded up 293 college females from the university’s Albany campus, who agreed to fill out an anonymous questionnaire about various aspects of their sex lives. 

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Posted: 23rd, August 2012 | In: Key Posts, News | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0