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The 5 Greatest Godzilla Movies Ever Made

 

god1 300x220 The 5 Greatest Godzilla Movies Ever Made

 

SINCE  his first silver screen appearance in 1954, Toho’s giant monster Godzilla has starred in more than two dozen epic movies.

The big green lizard has been featured as a terrifying villain, as a defender of the Earth, and, occasionally, even traveled to American shores to wreak havoc.  In this span, Godzilla has stood alone, acted as a tag team player (with friends like Anguirus and Rodan…), battled ancient threats to humanity, and even fended off alien invaders on more than one occasion (Monster Zero [1965], Final Wars [2004]).

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Posted: 14th, May 2014 | In: Film, Flashback, Key Posts | Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Mic Wright’s Remotely Furious: Coming Soon – Comedians Throwing Cash At Kids In The Congo

24 Hours to Go Broke Mic Wrights Remotely Furious: Coming Soon – Comedians Throwing Cash At Kids In The Congo

 

Mic Wright’s Remotely Furious: Coming Soon – Comedians Throwing Cash At Kids In The Congo

 

24 Hours to Go Broke could easily have been retitled Ha! Poor People and executive produced by the Bullingdon Club. One of the infrequent forays into original programming by Dave, home to the EU
Top Gear repeat stockpile, the premise is two comedians are sent to a foreign country to blow a pile of loot. The joke? That living costs in the locale are so low that they struggle to get shot of the £10k before the deadline and a poorly-defined forfeit.

Episode one saw David Baddiel and Richard Herring dropped in Yerevan, the capital of Armenia. The country sits uncomfortably at 116th in the world wealth index. Baddiel rationalised the tasteless premise by concluding that any travel show is just as bad: “Really, all TV shows that send anyone anywhere are doing exactly the same thing.” Still, he looked very uncomfortable throughout, particularly under the disapproving gaze of the room service waiter dispatched to bring champagne to the hotel’s presidential suite.

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Posted: 14th, May 2014 | In: Key Posts, TV & Radio | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Vintage Adverts : Feminine Hygiene-A-Go Go!

fem hyg advert 2 Vintage Adverts : Feminine Hygiene A Go Go!

 

FEMININE hygiene adverts prior to the late 1960s basically depicted menstruation as a shameful curse, a sickening burden upon womankind.  By the time the Baby Boomers started needing these products en masse, a revolution in feminine hygiene was underway.  There was still a sense of shame in these adverts, but now it was all about offering new features (i.e. “It’s flushable!).  While this may not be the most appealing topic you’ve ever read about, the advertising is still rather interesting and even a little humorous.  Take a look at a few examples.

 

 

“Gotta Get This Tampon Out Of Sight!” - Pursettes

 

fem hyg advert 3 Vintage Adverts : Feminine Hygiene A Go Go!

 

This tale of woe recounts the abominable shame experienced by a cheerleader when her purse hits the ground spilling out (gasp!) tampons.  What should she do?  Transferring to another school is such a hassle.  Luckily, her friend has Pursettes which keep her shameful secret hidden under wraps.  “Just call them the tote tampons.”

 

 

“That’s why so many women just like you are switching to it.” - Playtex Self-Adjusting Tampons

 

fem hyg advert 7 Vintage Adverts : Feminine Hygiene A Go Go!

 

I love how this is supposed to be an empowering advertisement, yet it totally undermines itself by its list of stereotypically feminine careers.    It’s attempting to illustrate that the Modern Woman has modern needs, and Playtex is just the product to keep up with the changing times.  Yet, the various groups of women they list are downright hilarious:  “Secretaries, Nurses, Stewardess, The Lady Next Door (WTF?), College Girls, Models, Housewives”.  They left out waitresses and strippers.

 

 

“Dear Mother Nature: Drop Dead!” - Kotex

 

fem hyg advert 4 Vintage Adverts : Feminine Hygiene A Go Go!

 

The last line reads: “At least you have to worry about your voice changing.”  This is a consolation of the sorriest sort.  Nearly a lifetime of menstruation versus a month or two of crackly vocal cords…. Hmmmm – which is worse?   On a side note: the lens diameter-to-face ratio of those glasses is the largest I have ever seen.  Simply breathtaking.

 

 

“It stayed in place, even when I was jumping streams.” - Stayfree Maxi Pads

 

fem hyg advert 1 Vintage Adverts : Feminine Hygiene A Go Go!

 

That’s a bold woman – her first day with Stayfree Maxi Pads and she’s sticking her ass directly in his face? Just a thought: maybe he goes up the hill first.  The ad ends with “Too bad he forgot to pack the lunch”.  Maybe he didn’t forget – he just lost his appetite.

 

 

“If you’re old enough to pick your clothes, you’re old enough to pick your sanitary napkin.” - Modess

 

fem hyg advert 5 Vintage Adverts : Feminine Hygiene A Go Go!

 

Advertisers aren’t stupid.  They knew the Baby Boomers represented the largest population bubble in the history of the United States.  Subsequently, ad agencies were scrambling to produce advertising geared toward this gargantuan money pot. The Modess advert above heavily features the new hippie chic whilst highlighting how grossly antiquated the older generation is.  Do you want to buy your sanitary napkins based on the opinion of your crusty archaic mother who seems so hopelessly out of place amongst counter-culture swag?  I didn’t think so.

 

 

“Whee! They’re Flushable, Too!” - New Freedom Kotex

 

fem hyg advert 6 Vintage Adverts : Feminine Hygiene A Go Go!

 

Yet another advert marketed directly to Boomer youth.  Truth be told, there actually was a lot to be excited about.  If you’re familiar with the previous generations’ feminine hygiene equipment, you’ll know there was cause for celebration.  That stuff was a bulky mess; it had barely improved from the Paleolithic days of using rolled grass and roots.  It consisted of various rigging using straps and belts in conjunction with giant swaths of absorbent linens.  You can see why a flushable inconspicuous napkin would be a godsend.

 

 

“It’s perfect for beginners like us!”Petal Soft Tampax

Petal Soft Tampax

 

fem hyg advert 1 Vintage Adverts : Feminine Hygiene A Go Go!

 

This ad comes from a 1986 issue of 16 Magazine, about a year after Tampax broke the ultimate taboo on American television: It used the word “period”.  Specifically the TV ad said, “It will change the way you feel about your period.”

When questioned about their startling expletive, the Tampax ad agency responded beautifully:

It’s a natural evolution.  Over the past five years everyone has gotten more straightforward.  It just doesn’t make sense any longer to show a woman in a long white dress, drifting through a field of wildflowers, saying something like, ‘It makes me feel fresh.’

Well said.

 

Posted: 14th, May 2014 | In: Flashback, Key Posts, The Consumer | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


May the Force Be With Them: The 5 Best Star Wars Knock-Offs of the Seventies and Eighties

swknockoff7 300x122 May the Force Be With Them: The 5 Best Star Wars Knock Offs of the Seventies and Eighties

 

WHEN George Lucas’s space fantasy Star Wars premiered in the summer of 1977 – and promptly became the highest grossing film in history – it was only a matter of time before intrepid filmmakers sought to imitate and thus re-capture the movie’s magic in a slew of lookalike films.

Importantly, the Star Wars film craze not only brought a barrage of new science fiction-themed films to the international box office, it also changed the very way that movie-makers approached the difficult-to-visualize genre.

Before Star Wars, the 1970s SF cinema obsessed, largely, on matters of environmental disaster and future dystopias  like Soylent Green (1973) and Logan’s Run (1976).

After Star Wars, however, science fiction films usually featured more action, colorful laser blasts, cute robotic sidekicks, and a concentration on fantasy aspects.

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Posted: 14th, May 2014 | In: Film, Flashback, Key Posts | Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Charlie Chaplin’s Visit to A Starstruck London in 1921

Charlie Chaplin Ritz Children from Hoxton 1921 Charlie Chaplins Visit to A Starstruck London in 1921

Charlie Chaplin poses with fifty boys and girls from Hoxton School, September 1921. PA/PA Archive/Press Association Images

 

CHARLIE Chaplin was woken on the morning 17 September 1921 while in his bed at the Ritz Hotel in London. “Visitors from Hoxton” he was told. From outside the window he could hear children singing the same song over and over again:

 

When the moon shines bright on Charlie Chaplin
His boots are cracking, for want of blacking
And his little baggy trousers need mending
Before we send him to the Dardanelles

 

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Posted: 13th, May 2014 | In: Celebrities, Flashback, Key Posts | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Attack Of The A-Frame: The Design Virus That Spanned Decades

A Frame 5 Attack Of The A Frame: The Design Virus That Spanned Decades

 

THERE’S only a finite number of ways you can arrange a canvas.  Naturally, there’s going to be some patterns that emerge, and certain motifs will be copied and repeated to oblivion within the pop art landscape.  An artful conception will suddenly be mimicked on comic book covers to movie posters to paperbacks to album covers, and it will continue for decades.

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Posted: 13th, May 2014 | In: Books, Film, Flashback, Key Posts | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


The 16 Greatest School Dance Scenes In Film

AH, yes. The school dance. Awkward and often soul shattering, it was a necessary rite of passage. It’s no surprise that such a dramatic collective memory would make for some great moments on film. Here’s a list (in no particular order) of the 16 greatest school dance scenes in movies. Feel free to add your own – I’d love to hear them.

 

It’s a Wonderful Life

 

dance scenes 1 The 16 Greatest School Dance Scenes In Film

 

 

The gym floor opening up into a pool is a beloved movie moment. It highlights perfectly George Bailey’s wild and promising youth before his big fall.

 

 

 

 

Carrie

 

dance scenes 8 The 16 Greatest School Dance Scenes In Film

 

Perhaps the most memorable of all high school dance scenes. DePalma’s split screen technique in combination with Spacek’s ghastly visage is one that’s hard to shake.  Last year’s remake game an honorable effort, but you just can’t recreate this sort of horror magic.

 

 

 

 

Zapped!

 

dance scenes 1 The 16 Greatest School Dance Scenes In Film
Scott Bao’s powers are taken to their limit, and we get to see Heather Thomas zapped and disrobed (well, actually her body double, but a high point in teen sex romps nonetheless).

 

 

 

 

Pretty in Pink

 

dance scenes 11 The 16 Greatest School Dance Scenes In Film

 

Andi (Molly Ringwald) ended up with Duckie in the original version of the film, but test audiences were appalled. John Hughes subsequently changed to the script to have Andi end up with Blaine (Andrew McCarthy). I strongly agree with that decision; in fact, I would have preferred Duckie die a horrible death instead.

 

 

 

 

Grease

 

dance scenes 6 The 16 Greatest School Dance Scenes In Film

 
Who cares that every kid at Rydell looks like they’re over 30. This dance scene with Travolta in his prime doing the Hand Jive is solid gold.

 

 

 

 

Can’t Buy Me Love

 

dance scenes 3 The 16 Greatest School Dance Scenes In Film

 

 

Somehow Patrick Dempsey’s African Anteater Ritual dance catches on, and soon the entire student body is joining in. What a bunch of sheep.

 

 

 

 

Sixteen Candles

 

dance scenes 13 The 16 Greatest School Dance Scenes In Film
The dance scene has so much to love: “True” by Spandau Ballet, a painfully awkward dance by Farmer Ted, a brief appearance by John Cusack, Dong and his buxom soul mate, the scoliosis girl, and a $1 cover charge to see Sam’s underwear.

 

 

 

 

Napoleon Dynamite

 

dance scenes 10 The 16 Greatest School Dance Scenes In Film

 

“My old girlfriend from Oklahoma was gonna fly out for the dance but she couldn’t cause she’s doing some modeling right now.”

Perfectly captures the awkwardness of being on the outer fringes of the popularity caste system – all to the sounds of Alphaville and Cindy Lauper.

 

 

 

 

Footloose

 

dance scenes 5 The 16 Greatest School Dance Scenes In Film

 

Ren and Ariel release some seriously pent up sexual energy on the dance floor. Lithgow was not amused.

 

 

 

 

Better Off Dead

 

dance scenes 7 The 16 Greatest School Dance Scenes In Film

 

Ricky (the fat dude from Head of the Class) dances like an effing maniac to impress Monique. I laughed till I ran out of air and blacked out, woke up and laughed some more.

 

 

 

 

Prom Night

 

dance scenes 2 The 16 Greatest School Dance Scenes In Film

 

A prolonged dance sequence set to disco music (featuring Jamie Lee Curtis) is unusual for a slasher film, but a beautiful thing nonetheless. It’s like Xanadu meets Friday the 13th. Even better, we get to see Leslie Neilsen putting on his boogie shoes!

 

 

 

 

Romy and Michele’s High School Reunion

 

dance scenes 12 The 16 Greatest School Dance Scenes In Film

 

The prom flashback is a brief but wonderfully effective reminder that high school dances feel monumentally important at the time, but really has no consequence for the life that awaits. The reunion dance to “Time After Time” is a nice touch as well.

 

 

 

 

American Graffiti

 

american graffiti 3 The 16 Greatest School Dance Scenes In Film

 

There’s a very touching scene with Cindy Williams interspersed with plenty of mid-century tomfoolery. My personal favorite moment: Ron Howard telling the principal to go kiss a duck.

 

 

 

 

Just One of the Guys

 

dance scenes 9 The 16 Greatest School Dance Scenes In Film

 

Joyce Hyser shows her friend that she’s really a girl in disguise by exposing her breasts. An odd but historic moment in the annals of gratuitous nudity. (And, no, it’s not in the video below)

 

 

 

 

Valley Girl 

 

prom valleygirl The 16 Greatest School Dance Scenes In Film

 

The curtain opens revealing a brawl between Randy (Nicholas Cage) and Tommy the Prom King. Hilarity ensues when the titular Valley Girl shoves guacamole in Tommy’s face and the crowd erupts into a food fight.

 

 

 

 

Back to the Future

 

dance scenes 2 The 16 Greatest School Dance Scenes In Film

 

McFly on the guitar playing “Johnny Be Good” to an eager crowd at the Enchantment Under the Sea dance is an amazing moment…. but then his digression into heavy metal guitar noodling leaves the audience saying “huh?”. Classic.

 

 

 

 

Honorable Mention: The pilot episode of Freaks and Geeks

 

It’s a TV show, but it still deserves a mention. Sam Weir finally gets to slow dance with his crush, but the opening to Styx’s “Come Sail Away” quickly turns loud and fast. He decides to go with the flow, stop being so damn self-conscious and just have fun. The feeling is contagious and his sister Lindsey, operating the punch bowls, who had a little something to do with the mentally challenged boy’s broken arm ventures over to see if he has forgiven her by asking him to dance. Perhaps the greatest school dance scene of them all.

 

 

Posted: 12th, May 2014 | In: Film, Flashback, Key Posts | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Boozvertising: The Art of Selling Alcohol With Sex And A Stuffed Penguin

THE beautiful thing about hard liquor advertising is that it is rarely nuanced or boring. It opts for the ham fisted approach, beating consumers over the head with brazen sexual tactics.  After all, they’re not selling sofa pillows here, folks.  They’re selling booze, and that means things may get interesting…

 

 

boozvertizing 5 Boozvertising: The Art of Selling Alcohol With Sex And A Stuffed Penguin

 

The “Two Fingers is all it takes” campaign begs the question – all it takes to do what?  Considering we’re talking about tequila, I assume it isn’t “improve your golf swing”.

It would have been interesting if the adverts finished their tagline with a bit of truthfulness, such as “Two Fingers is all it takes…. to impair your judgment and make terrible, life-changing mistakes.”

 

 

boozvertizing 2 Boozvertising: The Art of Selling Alcohol With Sex And A Stuffed Penguin

 

“I never even thought of burning my bra until I discovered Smirnoff.”

I don’t even get this.  Is she saying she didn’t believe in Women’s Lib until she starting drinking cheap vodka?  I guess I can relate.  I didn’t believe in Global Warming until I started huffing gasoline. (That was a joke, for those whose feathers are ruffled.)

 

boozvertizing 1 Boozvertising: The Art of Selling Alcohol With Sex And A Stuffed Penguin

 

Was this advert inspired by the abusive relationship of Ike & Tina?  This just makes me uncomfortable.  If only this was a Pam Grier film, she’d knock that glass to the floor saying, “You didn’t say ‘please’, bitch!”

 

 

boozvertizing 2 Boozvertising: The Art of Selling Alcohol With Sex And A Stuffed Penguin

 

They don’t have a sense of humor at airport security like they once did.  You do this nowadays and, instead of a laugh, you’ll get tasered and pepper sprayed.  If they’re feeling particularly jovial, they may even throw in a thorough cavity search and a trip to exotic Guantanamo for free.

 

 

boozvertizing 7 Boozvertising: The Art of Selling Alcohol With Sex And A Stuffed Penguin

 

The “sex sells” approach has always been a key marketing strategy for alcohol.  A clever tag line is great, but nothing beats a pair of boobs in a booze advert.

 

Although, sometimes some thinly veiled sexual innuendo does the trick even better…

 

 

boozvertizing 3 Boozvertising: The Art of Selling Alcohol With Sex And A Stuffed Penguin

 

There’s definitely something phallic going on here.  It’s as if Sigmund Freud himself was in charge of the Smirnoff account.

 

 

boozvertizing 1 Boozvertising: The Art of Selling Alcohol With Sex And A Stuffed Penguin

 

Translated literally:  “Your secretary will have sex with you, if you have lots of Cossack Vodka on hand.”

 

Presenting hard liquor as a gateway to otherwise impossible sexual relations was a common marketing strategy.  A perfect example is the following advert featuring a young Ali McGraw.

 

boozvertizing 8 Boozvertising: The Art of Selling Alcohol With Sex And A Stuffed Penguin

 

The text is spectacular:

“Never go to a bachelor’s pad alone… Especially if she has roommates.  Bachelor gals get nervous when an available male walks in, empty handed.  But come up with a bottle of White Horse and – thank – you’re welcome, Good Guy!  It’s the Scotch with the taste even roommates can’t argue about: either they like it or they love it.  So you end up with a roomful of purring girls, Good Guys all.  Works in a pad.  Works in a pub.  Because – the Good Guys are always on the White Horse.”

Quite literally, this bottle of Scotch will act as a pheromone, luring hordes of “purring” babes to your bachelor pad so you can have sex with them- all of them.

 

 

boozvertizing 11 Boozvertising: The Art of Selling Alcohol With Sex And A Stuffed Penguin

 

Lest you imagine the “sex sells booze” approach was strictly a Western thing, this advert clears up any misconception.  Asian advertisers were wise to the selling power of a chick in a silver bikini living in an empty gin bottle.  You might say Japanese were the greatest experts of them all.

 

 

boozvertizing 10 Boozvertising: The Art of Selling Alcohol With Sex And A Stuffed Penguin

Then again, the Japanese also made insanely stupid ads like this one, completely undermining my previous statement.  Of course, when it comes to booze adverts, the Japanese by no means have a monopoly on stupidity….

 

 

boozvertizing 6 Boozvertising: The Art of Selling Alcohol With Sex And A Stuffed Penguin

 

What the-? This is how I image the Madison Avenue brainstorming session went for this one:

 Ad Exec: “Okay, boys.  We need to sell some vodka.  Let’s hear the ideas.”

Jim:“I think we should go with a smoking hot babe wearing a tiny bikini, holding a bottle of vodka while splayed out on a bearskin rug.”

Fred:”I think we should go with a homely couple inexplicably taping a plastic bag to a stuffed penguin.”

Ad Exec: “Genius, Fred! Genius!”

Jim: (appears hopelessly confused then mumbles incoherently walking away)

 

 

boozvertizing 5 Boozvertising: The Art of Selling Alcohol With Sex And A Stuffed Penguin

 

Her shirt reads “It’s Real”.  I suppose it’s better than “They’re Fake”, but still not the greatest thing to emblazon across a female’s breasts.  She already looks a little tipsy, so she probably doesn’t care.

 

boozvertizing 4 Boozvertising: The Art of Selling Alcohol With Sex And A Stuffed Penguin

 

These Boodle ads from 1982 used the “always proper” British Gin as a slang for sex.  I wish they had gone a bit further with it.  For example, “Is it proper to boodle a complete stranger?”  Or even better, “Is it proper to boodle a circus clown while tripping on bath salts?”

 
boozvertizing 9 Boozvertising: The Art of Selling Alcohol With Sex And A Stuffed Penguin

 

“Have you these features? [A] Eyes deep set in soft flesh… characteristic of an appreciative type. [B] Ears lying close to the head… characteristic of a type with good taste.”

I guess we can deduce that those of you with protruding eyes and big ears have terrible taste.  You can’t argue with genetics.

Posted: 9th, May 2014 | In: Flashback, Key Posts, The Consumer | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


The 5 Most Underrated Brian De Palma Thrillers

depalma3 300x167 The 5 Most Underrated Brian De Palma Thrillers

 

SINCE the early seventies director Brian De Palma has crafted many intense and highly cerebral thrillers.

Alas, such efforts are often dismissed by critics as being overly imitative of Alfred Hitchcock’s films and style rather than praised for their own finely-developed sense of inter-textuality and intellectual gamesmanship.

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Posted: 8th, May 2014 | In: Film, Flashback, Key Posts | Comments (4) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Star Tracks: 6 Weird Songs About Famous People

WHEN Joe DiMaggio heard his name in Simon & Garfunkel’s “Mrs. Robinson”, he reportedly went into a rage and wanted to sue. To him, it sounded like an insult and insinuated that he was dead (“Joltin’ Joe has left and gone away.”) In truth, it was a homage – Paul Simon had worshiped DiMaggio growing up. The fact was explained to the baseball legend, but it’s likely he never really understood.

Similarly, when David Bowie played his tribute “Andy Warhol” in front of the artist himself, it was greeted with indifference. After the song was finished, there was an awkward silence and Warhol changed the subject inquiring about Bowie’s shoes.

Even though musicians are unlikely to get a pat on the back from the subject of their songs, that hasn’t stopped artists from making music about famous people either dead or living. From Ozzy’s ode to Alistair Crowley to Bananarama’s shout-out to Robert DeNiro, popular music is littered with songs namedropping famous people in the title. Here are six for your listening pleasure.

 

“Andy Warhol” by Dana Gillespie

 

songs of famous 4 Star Tracks: 6 Weird Songs About Famous People

 

Obviously, this was originally a Bowie song about one his biggest inspirations (found on his Hunky Dory LP). It was later covered by his sometime lover, sometime backing vocalist Dana Gillespie. Dana actually released a couple good albums under Bowie’s production company, but neither sold well, and she never was able to translate any form of success in the States. She moved on to concentrate on being an actress, then a bluesy singer a decade later. Despite her extremely varied career, one things always remained constant with Dana – massive cleavage.

 

 

 

“Rasputin” by Boney M

 

songs of famous 3 Star Tracks: 6 Weird Songs About Famous People

“Ra-Ra-Rasputin, Russia’s greatest love machine.”

Among his many crimes, Rasputin held control over the royal family, keeping them isolated and under his dark influence at the expense of the nation. But perhaps his most shameful legacy is this song; a disco travesty committed 62 years after his death.

 

 

 

“(My Name Is) Michael Caine” by Madness

 

 Star Tracks: 6 Weird Songs About Famous People

 
Using Caine’s Ipcress File (1965) as a basis for a song about the IRA was unusually weighty stuff for the band. Caine initially refused to add his voice to the song, but was convinced by his daughter (a Madness fan)… which is slightly ironic considering Caine isn’t exactly known for turning things down (Jaws: The Revenge, anyone?). But as he once pointed out: “You get paid the same for a bad film as you do for a good one.” It’s hard to argue with that.

 

 

 

“Black Superman (Muhammad Ali)” by Johnny Wakelin

 

songs of famous 2 Star Tracks: 6 Weird Songs About Famous People
Under the direction of the same record producer responsible for “Kung Fu Fighting”, Wakelin wrote this homage to Ali after watching the epic fight against George Foreman forever known as the Rumble in the Jungle.

Even worse than Bowie’s Warhol tribute, Muhammad Ali was nonplussed by Johnny Wakelin’s “Black Superman (Muhammad Ali)” and basically disowned it.

 

 

 

“Abraham, Martin And John” by Moms Mabley

 

songs of famous 1 Star Tracks: 6 Weird Songs About Famous People
This song earned a spot on our list of 13 Worst Songs of the 1960s. It is better remembered via renditions by Smokey Robinson, Marvin Gaye and Dion…. but Moms Mabley is what we’re dishing up today as proof that no matter how beautiful something is, it can always be ruined. As sad as the deaths of Lincoln, MLK and JFK are, at least they were spared having to hear Moms sing this song.

 

 

 

“Lord Grenville” by Al Stewart

 

songs of famous 1 Star Tracks: 6 Weird Songs About Famous People

 

Lord Grenville was a 16th Century Admiral immortalized in Alfred Lord Tennyson’s The Revenge – A Ballad of the Fleet. This may be the most intellectual song ever written – with historical storytelling, literary references, and philosophical questions of purpose and time, all wrapped in a transcendental melody circling upwards like cannabis vapors to the Heavens. Glorious.

 

Posted: 7th, May 2014 | In: Flashback, Key Posts, Music | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


9 Reasons Why Courtney Love Is Wrong About Saxophones In Rock ‘n’ Roll

 9 Reasons Why Courtney Love Is Wrong About Saxophones In Rock n RollSHE really is fun to have around, but Courtney Love isn’t exactly known for being right very often. While talking about Bruce Springsteen, she said she liked him, but didn’t really like his music and had a leave a show she’d been taken to.

Fair enough. Not everyone like Bruce Springsteen. And his shows go on for roughly 378 hours. And those cut-off shirts he wears need sorting out too.

However, while talking about The Boss, she said that “saxophones don’t belong in rock ‘n’ roll.”

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Posted: 7th, May 2014 | In: Key Posts, Music | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Don’t Blame Jeremy Clarkson For The Nigger Row: Top Gear Has No Black Faces To Control Him

PA 12184564 Dont Blame Jeremy Clarkson For The Nigger Row: Top Gear Has No Black Faces To Control Him

 

ONE of the three white, middle-age men who present Top Gear on the BBC says he is not a racist.

Jeremy Clarkson, for it is he, says:

 “I absolutely do not use that word. I use the C-word, the F-word but I don’t use the N-word. Never do.”

He adds:

“I’m sitting here begging your forgiveness.”

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Posted: 2nd, May 2014 | In: Key Posts, TV & Radio | Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Five Sci-Fi TV Series that FOX TV Axed Before Their Time

fox5 300x184 Five Sci Fi TV Series that FOX TV Axed Before Their Time

 

JUST this week, Fox Television announced the cancellation of the high-profile series Almost Human (2013 – 2014), a science fiction endeavor starring Karl Urban and Michael Ealy, and executive-produced by J.J. Abrams.

Fans of the short-lived series remain heartbroken that Fox showed so little faith in the promising venture.

But perhaps the saddest fact here is that the early axing of Almost Human conforms to Fox’s long-time pattern of murdering genre TV programs while they are still in the cradle.

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Posted: 2nd, May 2014 | In: Flashback, Key Posts, TV & Radio | Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Breathe New Life Into Your Playlists With 100 Songs As Chosen By New Wavers

smash hits 1980 02 21 0000 Breathe New Life Into Your Playlists With 100 Songs As Chosen By New Wavers

 

COULD your Spotify and iTunes playlists use some sprucing up? Let these Post Punk and Synth Pop artists rejuvinate your tired lists with their fresh audio suggestions. Pulled from the pages of 1980 issues of Smash Hits magazine are ten “All Time Top Ten Lists” as chosen by selected New Wavers.

 

Steve Eagle of The Photos

 

 

1. “I Saw Her Standing There” by The Pink Fairies
2. “I Just Wanna Have Something to Do” by The Ramones
3. “Groover” by T. Rex
4. “You Got My Number” by The Undertones
5. “Always Crashing in the Same Car” by David Bowie
6. “I Just Don’t Know What to Do with Myself” by Dusty Springfield
7. “Song For Life” by Johnny Cash
8. “All the Young Dudes” by Mott the Hoople
9. “New Rose” by The Damned
10. “D’yer Maker” by Led Zeppelin

 

 

Ranking Roger of The Beat

 

 

1. “Anarchy in the UK” by Sex Pistols
2. “Death Disco” by Public Image LTD
3. “White Riot” by The Clash
4. “Trans Europe Express” by Kraftwerk
5. “Nite Klub” by The Specials
6. “Majestic Dub” by Joe Gibbs and the Professionals
7. “O Level Dub” by Clint Eastwood
8. “Pistol Boy” by Militant Barry
9. “Armagideon Time” by The Clash
10. “Dread at the Controls” by Mikey Dread

 

 

Jona Lewie

 

 

1. “The Fat Man” by Fats Domino
2. “My Baby Left Me” by Elvis Presley
3. “Honky Tonk Women” by The Rolling Stones
4. “That’s Alright Mama” by Snooks Eaglin
5. “I Am the Walrus” by The Beatles
6. “Eleanor Rigby” by The Beatles
7. “Beat on the Brat” by The Ramones
8. “Virginia Plain” by Roxy Music
9. “Brass in Pocket” by The Pretenders
10. “I’m a Lazy Sod” by Sex Pistols

 

 

Ian McCulloch of Echo and the Bunnymen

 

 

1. “Famous Blue Raincoat” by Leonard Cohen
2. “Try to Remember” by The Kingston Trio
3. “Search and Destroy” by Iggy and the Stooges
4. “Mess of My” by The Fall
5. “Sister Ray” by Velvet Underground
6. “The Bewlay Brothers” by David Bowie
7. “Lady Stardust” by David Bowie
8. “Over the Wall” by Echo and the Bunnymen
9. “Anarchy in the UK” by Sex Pistols
10. “Mother” by John Lennon

 

 

Paul Humphreys of Orchestral Manoeuvres in the Dark

 

 

1. “Atmosphere” by Joy Division
2. “Cities” by Talking Heads
3. “Europe Endless” by Kraftwerk
4. “Morale” by Human League
5. “Before and After Science” by Eno
6. “Missing Fifteen Minutes” by Dalek I
7. “Isolation” by Joy Division
8. “My Way” by Sid Vicious
9. “Thrash” by Cowboys International
10. “Pennsylvania 65000” by Glen Miller

 

 

Julian Cope of Teardrop Explodes

 

1. “The Modern Dance” by Pere Ubu
2. “Jackie/Mathilde” by Scott Walker
3. “When the Music’s Over” by The Doors
4. “Stepping Out” by The Fall
5. “Sweet Surrender” by Tim Buckley
6. “King of the Streets” by Armand Schaubroeuk
7. “The Electrician” by The Walker Brothers
8. “Alone Again Or” by Love
9. “Walk on Gilded Splinters” by Dr. John
10. “My Head is My Only House until It Rains” by Captain Beefheart

 

 

Hugh Cornwell of The Stranglers

 

 

1. “Whip It” by Devo
2. “I Got You” by Split Enz
3. “Rescue” by Echo and the Bunnymen
4. “Tri X Pan” by Tea Set
5. “Something Else” by Eddie Cochran
6. “We Are Family” by Sister Sledge
7. “Le Freak” by Chic
8. “Young at Heart” by Frank Sinatra
9. “Stay” by The Hollies
10. “My Little Red Book” by Love

 

Toyah Wilcox

 

 

“In the Year 2525” by Zager and Evans
“Bewlay Brothers” by David Bowie
“Spaceball” by Marc Bolan
“The Modern Dance” by Pere Ubu
“Berlin” by Lou Reed
“Baby’s On Fire” by Brian Eno
“Back to Nature” by Fad Gadget
“Castles Made of Sand” by Jimi Hendrix
“Emmie” by Laura Nyro
“Starsailor” by Tim Buckley

 
Holly Vincent of Holly and the Italians

 

 

1. “Come On” by Cheap Trick
2. “I Don’t Wanna Walk Around With You” by The Ramones
3. “Trash” by The New York Dolls
4. “He’s a Whore” by Cheap Trick
5. “I Just Wanna Have Something to Do” by The Ramones
6. “Insanely Jealous” by The Soft Boys
7. “The Way of the World” by Cheap Trick
8. “Stand by Your Man” by Tammy Wynette
9. “Slow Motion” by Ultravox
10. “Quiet Life” by Japan

 

 

Eddie Tenpole of Tenpole Tudor

 

 

1. “Get Off My Cloud” by The Rolling Stones
2. “Talk of the Town” by The Pretenders
3. “Golden Birdies” by Captain Beefheart and the Magic Band
4. “Borstal Breakout” by Sham 69
5. “Clarinet Concerto” by Mozart
6. “Can You Hear Me” by David Bowie
7. “Just another Dream” by The Professionals
8. “You Need Hands” by Malcolm MacLaren
9. “Hey Negrita” by The Rolling Stones
10. “Chiquitita” by ABBA

 

Eddie’s note to the #10 ABBA song: “The last twenty seconds is the best tune I’ve ever heard. The rest is rubbish.”

Posted: 2nd, May 2014 | In: Flashback, Key Posts, Music | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


The Five Most Underrated John Carpenter Movies

carpenter1 300x128 The Five Most Underrated John Carpenter Movies

 

JOHN Carpenter’s film career has had its critical ups and downs, but time – the final arbiter of success, perhaps – has been almost universally kind to the vast majority of his cinematic work.

Reviled upon release in the summer of Spielberg’s E.T., John Carpenter’s The Thing (1982) is now revered as a horror classic and a work of art superior to the Howard Hawks film of 1951.

Similarly, Carpenter’s anti-yuppie battle cry, They Live (1988) has been re-evaluated as an ahead-of-its time masterpiece about the imminent death of the middle class in America, and “vulture capitalists” picking at its bones.

Even In the Mouth of Madness (1994), dismissed on original release as lesser-Carpenter, is widely considered now to be the finest interpretation of the Lovecraft aesthetic yet committed to film.

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Posted: 1st, May 2014 | In: Film, Flashback, Key Posts | Comments (8) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


The 10 Best Anti-Racism Songs

IN the past couple of years, most of us have been surprised, shocked and nauseated by high profile racism. In football, we’ve seen players walking off the pitch in protest and eating bananas thrown at them. The NBA is currently feeling the fire after the Clippers’ owner said a bunch of appalling shit in a phone call to his girlfriend.

Of course, it you’re not in a bubble, you’ll know that, while work against racism has come a long way, there’s still a lot to be done.

One of the greatest conveyors of message is music, so with recent events, we’ve picked a bunch of records that should show you two things: People against racism ALWAYS make better music than racists and, secondly, some of these records are old, while some are new, which underlines how depressingly racism still looms in our society.

The most recent protest is from R&B god, The-Dream, who released ‘BLACK’ online, where he says: “Black isn’t just a colour; Black isn’t just a race anymore. It’s a feeling and a place from which one feels isolated by the world of the governing elite. Classism is the new racism. This is what black feels like.”

Have a listen to The-Dream’s new song, and a selection of other great anti-racist records. We’ve decided to pick a bunch that are off the beaten track, but feel free to share the famous and your favourites with us.

 

The-Dream ‘BLACK’

Brand new and powerful. Depressing that, in 2014, this record needed to be made.

 

 

The Impressions ‘Mighty Mighty’

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Posted: 1st, May 2014 | In: Key Posts, Music | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


From 1968 And 1970 Visitors To Margate And Girvan Took A Trip Through Keith Albarn’s Fun Houses

IN 1968, the Funland theme park in Margate, Kent, introduced a new attraction.

Created by Keith Albarn, The Spectrum presented psychedelic rooms, each space presenting intrigued youth with an adventure and a challenge. Rooms features “Ekistikit” – a GRP modular building and furniture system.

This was not infertile ground for sensory experimentation. Margate is a seaside town had a reputation for artistic endeavour:

 

PA 12473957 From 1968 And 1970 Visitors To Margate And Girvan Took A Trip Through Keith Albarns Fun Houses

Lucy, the 88-year-old elephant who is a city landmark, will be restored and converted into a children’s library, if Margate residents get their way in Margate, New Jersey on Jan. 23, 1970. The Save Lucy Committee is in the throes of a campaign to raise money to move Lucy onto city property from the privately-owned site which is up for sale, and then beautify her. Lucy dwarfs admirer Stacey Kroger, 5. (AP Photo)

 

 

Pathe News was there to showcase Albarn’s mental adventure:

 

 

Albarn did not stop there. As he tells us, he got better. In Girvan, a seaside town in Carrick, South Ayrshire, he created the Fifth Dimension, another psychedelic, fibreglass fun house.

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Posted: 30th, April 2014 | In: Flashback, Key Posts, The Consumer | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


From Movies to TV: 10 Tragic Failures

fast times tv From Movies to TV: 10 Tragic Failures

Fast Times at Ridgemont High (1982)
1986 TV Adaptation “Fast Times”

 

MOVIES adapted for television series aren’t necessarily terrible; in fact, the outcome is often quite good. The Odd Couple and M*A*S*H* both had great translations for the small screen. Even Alice Doesn’t Live Here Anymore, a dark drama by Martin Scorsese found an interesting niche in the sitcom universe via Alice.

Unfortunately, for every success, there are a sizeable number of failures. This is where I come in and deliver up ten tragic examples of where a movie was adapted for television yielding regrettable results.

 

Animal House (1978)
1979 TV Adaptation: “Delta House”, 13 episodes

When you remove the bawdy humor from Animal House, you’re cutting out its heart. It’s like removing the dancing from Singin’ in the Rain. Crass jokes and irresponsible humor were the lifeblood of the original film; to clean things up for prime time TV was a mistake of epic proportions.

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Posted: 30th, April 2014 | In: Flashback, Key Posts, TV & Radio | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


The Five Weirdest Things Ever Thrown Onto A Pitch

 

WHEN Villarreal fans taunted Barcelona’s Dani Alves by throwing him a banana, it was not entirely surprising.

Spain does, after all, have a history of this kind of racist goading, including such notable incidents as the monkey chanting directed at England players during the 2004 international in Madrid….

 

Throw2 The Five Weirdest Things Ever Thrown Onto A Pitch

 

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Posted: 29th, April 2014 | In: Flashback, Key Posts, Sports | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


When Max Clifford Met Mandy Allwood: Police, Power, Sex, Money And Tabloids

MAX Clifford has been found guilty of eight charges of indecent assault.

Ron Greenslade recalls his dealings with the great story fixer. He focuses on the story of Mandy Allwood. Britain’s own Octomum, gave birth to two girls and six boys in September 1996. They were premature.

Within hours of being born, all of the children had died.

 

PA 1064797 When Max Clifford Met Mandy Allwood: Police, Power, Sex, Money And Tabloids

Mandy Allwood with her partner Paul Hudson with the coffins of the eight unborn babies of Mandy Allwood are carried in procession during their funeral in West Norwood Cemetery, London. Max Clifford her publicist stands behind her
Date: 14/10/1996

 

Mandy and the babies - Kypros, Adam, Martyn, Cassius, Nelson, Donald, Kitali and Layne – were big news, as they had been ever since she had hired a publicist. He was, of course, Max Clifford.

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Posted: 29th, April 2014 | In: Flashback, Key Posts, News | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Pages of Polyester: The Sears 1974 Catalog

FROM the women’s fashion section of the 1974 Fall-Winter Sears Catalog, here are 35 pages of earth-toned acrylics, skin-tight polyester, and knitted creations that should have never seen the light of day.  Seventies fashions are fun to behold because they could be so frighteningly terrible; however, if you can resist the easy temptation to scoff at 70s styles and view them with an open mind, some are actually quite brilliant.  Today’s everyday styles can be so tired and unremarkable – it’s refreshing to see something bold and unique.  Come take a look….

 

Sears 1974 Fall Winter Catalog 0036 Pages of Polyester: The Sears 1974 Catalog

 

A black and orange striped sweater-vest over a tight olive green turtleneck sweater…. can somebody explain how this happened?  The simple answer is widespread recreational drug use, but I’m open to other theories.

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Posted: 29th, April 2014 | In: Fashion, Flashback, Key Posts | Comments (8) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Manchester City And Imre Varadi Were Right: Don’t Blame The Banana For Racism In Football

CHUCKING banana skins and grunting like a monkey are things of history in British football. Over in Spain, racism is more prevalent. Last night, Barcelona’s Dani Alves fielded a banana tossed from the crowd at Villarreal’s Estadio El Madrigal and ate it.

 

 

He didn’t even pick off the black and stringy bits. He just peeled and ate it, in a move that mocked both the mentally negligible fool who’d tossed it and the threat of indigestion.

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Posted: 28th, April 2014 | In: Key Posts, Manchester City, Sports | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Tomes Of Shame: Awful Nonfiction From The 1970s

THE sad truth is, nonfiction garbage is hard to come by.  Libraries regularly cull their shelves, ridding the world of their outdated and tacky tomes.  Plus, how many people are going to display any one of these books in their home library and endure the subsequent deep and abiding shame?  Not many.  So, they end up on the trash heap, gone forever…. That is, until someone like me resurrects them (at least their covers) for your viewing enjoyment.  You’re welcome. 

 

1972 TFH Book Dog Horoscopes Tomes Of Shame: Awful Nonfiction From The 1970s

Dog Horoscopes (1972)

 

Your Horoscope for Today:  With Venus moving into gentle Pisces this week, you will feel a distinct urge to dry hump human legs.  You may even decide to accept a friend’s invitation to smell his/her anus.  The afternoon and evening brings the possibility of lots of indoor pooping. 

 

nonfiction 1 Tomes Of Shame: Awful Nonfiction From The 1970s

How To Heal The Sick, Cast Out Devils And Still Go To Hell by R. W. Schambach (1976)

 

This book is fine, but I’m more interested in the companion volume: How To Live Selfishly, Enjoy Pornography, And Still Go To Heaven.

 

Enduring Poles by Natsolim aka Harry Milostan 1977 Tomes Of Shame: Awful Nonfiction From The 1970s

Enduring Poles by Natsolim (1977)

 

Finally, a guide to enduring those insufferable Polish people.

 

SUBLIMINAL SEDUCTION WILSON BRYAN KEY FIRST PRINTING 1974 Tomes Of Shame: Awful Nonfiction From The 1970s

Subliminal Seduction by Wilson Bryan Key (1974)

 

“Are you being sexually aroused by this picture?”

If your answer is “yes”, I think it owes more to your debilitating alcohol addiction than any advertising trickery.  Is this orange rind supposed to remind me of a flaccid and dismembered sex organ?  If so, then I am most definitely not aroused…. nor will I be for quite some time thanks to this.

 

More Lives Than One by Jeffrey Iverson 1977 Tomes Of Shame: Awful Nonfiction From The 1970s

More Lives Than One? by Jeffrey Iverson (1977)

 

In every life this woman was prone to staring blankly upward.  Nutty theories like this were rampant in the 1970s, here’s another…

 

sbs Helping Yourself With White Witchcraft Al Manning 1972 Tomes Of Shame: Awful Nonfiction From The 1970s

Helping Yourself With White Witchcraft by Al Manning (1972)

 

Among the many promises offered on the back:

How to use rituals and spells to attract money and prosperity!
How to use rituals and spells to attract and hold a lover!
How to ward off the Evil Eye and protect yourself against Secret Psychic Attack!

It says that the author was an accountant before he flaked out.  Personally, it’s hard for me to take a witch or warlock seriously with those kinds of credentials.

“Morgan La Fey, Enchantress, Tax Professional and Financial Advisor” just doesn’t work.  Neither does “Angmar the Witch King, C.P.A.”

 

Creative Firing Chester Burger 1974 Tomes Of Shame: Awful Nonfiction From The 1970s

Creative Firing by Chester Burger (1974)

 

In which we learn how to fire people via poetry or haiku.  Especially interesting is the chapter on creating beautiful watercolor paintings of nature scenes… all signed “you’re fired”, of course.

 

nonfiction 2 Tomes Of Shame: Awful Nonfiction From The 1970s

It Hurts So Bad, Lord! by Andrew D. Lester (1976)

 

Yeesh.  This is just awkward.  Let’s move on…

 

Amanda Stewart SEX THERAPIST MY STORY 1st Printing Ace 1975 Tomes Of Shame: Awful Nonfiction From The 1970s

Sex Therapist: My Story by Amanda Stewart (1975)

 

“Are the new sex therapists part of the legitimate medical community – or are they prostitutes?”

What in the ever lovin’ f**k?  Was this really a question?  I can understand if there was a healthy skepticism about this new profession; however, it seems a stretch to speculate that it entailed having sex for money. (But if it is true, I hope it’s not too late for me to make a drastic career change.)

 

RIPLEYS BELIEVE IT OR NOT 19th Series 1st Printing 1972 Tomes Of Shame: Awful Nonfiction From The 1970s

Ripley’s Believe It Or Not 19th Series (1972)

 

“Is she the bearded lady, or is she part porcupine, or what? [see back cover]”

Ummm.… why in the name of all this holy would you ever think she is the bearded lady?  For the curious, the back cover reads:

  “What she has on her face are ordinary toothpicks broken in half; for some reason, a light touch makes them cling.  Believe it… or Not!”

 

How to Really Love Your Child by Ross Campbell 1977 Tomes Of Shame: Awful Nonfiction From The 1970s

How to Really Love Your Child by Ross Campbell (1977)

 

We know you’ve been faking it for a long time.  Now, it’s time to learn how to really love that brat.  And once you’ve figured that out, it’s on to that spouse of yours…

 

1970 Tomes Of Shame: Awful Nonfiction From The 1970s

How To Live With A Neurotic Wife by Stephen Baker (1970)

 

Well, it certainly makes things a lot easier if your wife happens to be a stone cold fox…

 

neurotic wife2 Tomes Of Shame: Awful Nonfiction From The 1970s

 

The back cover reads “The author and his (non-neurotic) wife.”

First of all, Stephen Baker obviously used Al Manning’s White Witchcraft to make this happen (there can be on other explanation).  Second, I’m not thrilled with his cocky grin.  We know you did well for yourself, Stephen.  No need to gloat.

Posted: 28th, April 2014 | In: Books, Key Posts | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Inside Scarfolk: An Interview With The Mayor Of Dystopia UK, Richard Littler

 Children and hallucinogens Inside Scarfolk: An Interview With The Mayor Of Dystopia UK, Richard Littler

 

IF you’ve visited Richard Littler’s Scarfolk, you will have come away with a feeling of how life was in mid-20th Century Britain. Scarfolk is a dystopian town in the North-West of England gripped by fear of witches, children, babies and salad.

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Posted: 25th, April 2014 | In: Books, Key Posts | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


“If He Fires Me, I’ll Thank Him For It”: Five Great Character Moments in the Timothy Dalton James Bond Era

 

bond3 300x129 “If He Fires Me, I’ll Thank Him For It”:  Five Great Character Moments in the Timothy Dalton James Bond Era

 

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Posted: 25th, April 2014 | In: Film, Flashback, Key Posts | Comments (6) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0