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We don’t just report off-beat news, breaking news and digest the best and worst of the news media analysis and commentary. We give an original take on what happened and why. We add lols, satire, news photos and original content.

eBay dogging and murder caravan goes viral

dooging

 

On eBay the caravan “suitable for affairs or murders” is for sale.

“Apparently I owned this utterly crap caravan for three weeks before actually setting eyes on it.

“My husband drunkenly bought it on Ebay, and neglected to mention that one day he’d taken the day off work and driven halfway across the country to pick it up, deposit it around the back of our office, and failed to declare it as technically a marital ‘asset’ until recently.

“Luckily, I’m the trusting type, and despite appearances I don’t think he bought it solely for the purpose of having a sordid extra-marital affair or taking up dogging, however as you might be able to see from the pictures, it would be PERFECT for both…

“It has been brought to my attention that the “caravan” would also be suitable for use as a rolling meth lab. Apologies for the omission.”

Also: badger watching.

Posted: 28th, August 2015 | In: News, The Consumer | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Watch: man refuses to stop shagging in VR sex simulation demo

Give a man a VR headset and a plastic doll and he’s good to go.

And go…

vr sex

Posted: 28th, August 2015 | In: News, Technology | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Migrants: they come not to live but to conquer or die trying

van migrant dead

 

Can you imagine the horror? Seventy-one bodies have been discovered in the back of a lorry in Austria abandoned on motorway near the Hungarian border.

The dead – 59 men, eight women and four children – are,  reports the BBC, believe to have suffocated. They are thought to be fleeing from the madness in Syria.

Four people have been arrested.

German Chancellor Angela Merkel says:

“This is a warning for us to tackle the issue of migration quickly. We have more refugees in the world than at any time since the Second World War. The world’s eyes are upon us.”

Let them in. Destroy the trade in human flesh. Let the desperate not spend their last monies on a gangster with a dingy and a van. Let them in. Let them in with money so they can eat and live.

Earlier this week, 51 dead people were found in the hold of a ship off the coast of Libya. The Swedish coastguard ship arrived too late for them but it did manage to save 400 others, says the BBC. A boat carrying  an estimated 500 people capsized in the Med. Two hundred were found alive.

What to do? What to do?

Let them in.

See how they get on in fortress Europe.

Slovakia refuses to accept Muslim migrants. The country has yet to perfect its Muslim-detecting devices. But give it time.

Bulgaria keeps migrants out with 50 miles of razor wire along Turkish border. This fence is 15ft tall and 5ft wide. They say its kept people out, around 500 last month.

The language is fiery. The Daily Express wrote in July:

Fires, which are currently blocking access to the harbour, have plunged the crisis zone into further chaos.

It comes after Britain’s borders faced more disruption last night as hundreds of migrants including children stormed the Eurotunnel.

David Cameron has said Britain is threatened by a “swarm” of foreigners and the migrant crisis in Calais was likened to a “warzone.”

Migrants were pictured clinging to a lorry as they left the port of Dover, while others in Calais were seen clambering over fences with children in tow.

More than 4,000 increasingly aggressive and desperate migrants largely from war-torn failed African states have stormed through fences in a bid to clamber aboard trains to ‘El Dorado’ UK.

An estimated 150 have made it to Britain’s shores, with some claiming an increased feeling nationwide that the country is under siege.

Mr Cameron, meanwhile, remains in Vietnam and Theresa May has refused to call in military support to help the beleagured French forces.

Despite the numbers of migrants flooding into Britain, Mr Cameron has insisted the border with France is secure although he did admit the threat was very real. . . .

Natalie Chapman, of the Freight Transport Association, likened the scenes of chaos in Calais to a “warzone” and fears it is only a matter of time till a British driver gets killed in the French port.

She said: “The situation in Calais has been escalating over the last few months and you think it can’t get any worse – and then it does.

“For lorry drivers trying to get to the UK it’s like a warzone. You’ve got people who have made in many cases very long and dangerous journeys to try to get to the UK who will stop at nothing to try to get on board.

The desperate are now invaders. They do not come to escape, but to conquer.

The language is hard-edge. But it’s honest, at least. All mainstream political parties agree with the Express. They bluster at the language, point to the man who says “swarm” and demand he retract the slur, but they  all agree with the sentiment that migrants must be kept out.

They force David Cameron to explain why he referred to migrants as a ‘swarm’ – he says it was not ‘dehumanising’. Was it? Was it worst than the Labour Party who made Bulgarians and Romanians second-class Europeans, and who dismantled Libya and Afghanistan by bomb and bullet, dead countries from which migrants are escaping? Was it worse than ignoring the plight of ordinary Syrians, looking on as the country fell into disorder?

A confident Europe would not argue the toss and draw up a glossary of acceptable terms. It would let them in. These are the people who want to be here. Let them in

 

Posted: 28th, August 2015 | In: News | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Transfer Balls: why Everton rejected Chelsea’s bid for John Stones

stones chelsea

 

John Stones wants to leave Everton. Chelsea have been tapping on the player’s door all summer, keen to spend all that filthy lucre on the great English hope. Everton are not a big brand. They cannot offer Stones Champions’ League football and massive wages. Roman Abramovich’s Chelsea can.

But Everton can offer Stones a home where he can make mistakes and learn his trade. They can offer him loyal fans who do not turn up only to see their side win, and a young talented manager who wants to keep him.

Stones should stay at Goodison Park, writes Tony Barrett.

The theory throughout an increasingly tortuous transfer saga has been that there would be an offer that would make Everton buckle, but by adopting such a strong position through their manager, the club have given themselves the best possibly chance of keeping Stones.

Should they do so, they will send a message to clubs in a similar position that they do not have to yield to the league’s biggest fish; that even when a player has formally expressed his desire to go, they can ensure that he sticks to the contract he signed and prevent a scenario in which a club as powerful as Chelsea make themselves even stronger at your expense.

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Posted: 27th, August 2015 | In: Chelsea, News, Sports | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Hitting the deadline: Colin Fry has died

colin fry ripTV Medium Colin Fry has died aged 53. The spiritualist, who appeared and made a handsome living from relaying impressions of messages from long/short-gone friends and family via programmes such as 6ixth Sense with Colin Fry, Psychic Private Eye and Most Haunted, had been diagnosed with terminal lung cancer back in April.

His manager David Hahn said: “Because of what he does (did surely?) he had no fear of dying”.

Anyone had a call from Colin, any flying objects around the house or non-alcoholic induced sense of the Fry presence? The perpetual tv’s very own Stephen Fry does not count.

No? Thought so.

Fear not, there’ll be another medium warming up to present Colin’s cold, sympathetic but very deadpan thoughts in half a failing heartbeat.

Posted: 27th, August 2015 | In: Celebrities, News | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Romance ‘wore': woman keys boyfriend’s car misspells ‘whore’

shannon csapilla

 

To Stamford, Connecticut, where Shannon Csapilla, 20, allegedly keyed her ex-boyfriend’s car, scratching the word “wore” into the paintwork.

At first glance is appears that Csapilla misspelt ‘whore’ But it could be that she also misspelt ‘war’, ‘wire’ or ‘were’.

Or maybe she spelt wore correctly and was making an oblique reference to the car’s tyres?

 

Spotter: Stamford Advocate

 

Posted: 27th, August 2015 | In: News | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Jimmy Kimmel no longer only man alive not to have seen Miley Cyrus’ breasts

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In readiness to shock to deadline on the corporate VMA awards, host Miley Cyrus appeared on Jimmy Kimmel Live with most of her breasts exposed.

Kimmel was thought by many to be one of the three remaining human being not to have seen Cyrus’s breasts. Miley is now actively seeking an audience with the Pope and Lord Lucan, preferably both at once to save time before she can move on to stage 2 of Operation Primary Sexual Characteristics and show us her massive beefy knob.

 

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Kimmel was keen to know if Miley’s dad had appraised his daughter’s naked chest.

“My dad’s cool, because I’m sure he’d maybe rather me not have my tits out all the time,” said Cyrus. “But he’d rather me have my tits out and be a good person than have a shirt on and be a bitch.”

Those are a pretty limited set of life choices in the Cyrus household.

“You know what I’ve learned? It’s not the tit—are you allowed to say ‘tit’ on your show?”added Cyrus.
“Humans aren’t afraid of the human breast. It’s the nipple that’s the issue…Like, I’m showing my boobs and no one has a problem, but the nipples are covered, so somehow that’s OK. So America’s actually fine with tits. It’s nipples they don’t like.”

Which is great news for Donald Trump’s presidential campaign.

Posted: 27th, August 2015 | In: Celebrities, News, TV & Radio | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Transfer Balls: Chelsea undercut Barcelona’s winning Pogba bid

Transfer Balls salutes the work of the Daily Mail which today reports that Chelsea have tabled a £54million bid for Paul Pogba. Juventus saw the bid and rejected it.

The paper than adds that Chelsea won’t get Pogba anyhow.

Barcelona held formal talks in June with Juventus over Pogba and believe they have an option for signing the 22-year-old next summer with the valuation set at around £73million.

So how can Chelsea have hoped to by the former Manchester United player for less then the £73m Barcelona had set aside?

And earlier the Mail said that Barcelona had seen a bid or £57m rejected – still more than chela’s bid.

 

Screen shot 2015-08-27 at 13.21.20

 

And what of the part about Manchester City giving up on Pogba? That’s odd because the Mail told us the Citizens had £70m earmarked for the Frenchman.

 

Screen shot 2015-08-27 at 13.26.23

 

Such are the facts in the Daily Mail.

 

Posted: 27th, August 2015 | In: Chelsea, News, Sports | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Manchester United: Alex Ferguson makes the most useless signing of his life

Today is 26th August, 2015 – the date that will echo throughout history as the day Sir Alex Ferguson joined the LinkedIn.

For those blissfully unaware, LinkedIn is a social networking site aimed at professionals. It is also responsible for generating almost 70% of the internet’s entire quota of unsolicited emails, but that’s really by-the-by. It is utterly useless.

Anyway, Sir Alex has created an account, billing himself as a “Director, Ambassador, Visiting Fellow and Author”. Yeah, we fibbed about the ‘dreamweaver’ bit. Apologies where due.

It should be visible here if you happen to be a LinkedIn member.

 

alex ferguson linked in

 

 

The 73-year-old former Manchester United manager has joined LinkedIn to coincide with the release of his latest book, ‘Leading’, in which he details the various managerial techniques he used to transform United into the global success they are today – screaming indecipherably in people’s faces, lacerating people’s eyebrows with flying Adidas Predators, that kind of thing.

Sadly, users will only be able to contact Sir Alex if they know him personally, thus depriving fans of rivals teams the opportunity to engage in direct slanging.

Damn shame. There could have been some decent mileage in that.

Posted: 27th, August 2015 | In: manchester united, News, Sports | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Mayor wants flamethrowers banned: ‘only the police should have them’

'He wasn't black when we shot him'

‘He wasn’t black when we shot him’

 

The Mayor of Warren in Michigan, Jim Fouts, is upset that youths are spending their pocket money on flamethrowers, which retail at a bargain $1,000 a go.

“This is something that is so potentially dangerous that it’s just unacceptable,” he says.

Fouts says he has no argument with the right to carry arms, it’s just that he only wants police to have flamethrowers. This way, after they’ve shot you in the face they can purify the crime scene and bar-b-cue your remains.

 


YouTube link.

 

Posted: 26th, August 2015 | In: News, Strange But True | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Transfer Balls: Neymar wants to play for Manchester United just like Pique does for Real Madrid

More scoops a -plenty in the trusty Daily Star, where journalism “clown” (source: Karim Benzema) Jack Wilson says Neymar wants to play for Manchester United.

 

Untitled

 

Neymar wants to leave the mighty Barcelona for life under Louis Van Gaal in Manchester? Is he mad?

 

JAck Wilson daily star

 

Jack Wilson has all the facts. And aside from the parts about Neymar wanting to play for Man United and Gerard Pique playing for Real Madrid (he plays for Barcelona at the Nou Camp; and unlike Madrid’s Sergio Ramos, the Spaniard never did use United’s interest to negotiate a pay rise) it’s all spot on.

 

Posted: 25th, August 2015 | In: manchester united, News, Sports | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Transfer Balls: Arsenal defy the Daily Star and refuse to unveil Benzema before Liverpool match

Did you see Arsenal unveil their new striker Karim Benzema before last night’s Liverpool match? Or were you reading the Daily Star when it happened, your eyes searching the pages for more scoops?

 

Untitled

 

For those of you who missed the great unveiling, here’s Karim:

 

benzema arsenal laughs

 

Meanwhile…over at the Daily Star’s Big Top, Jack Wilson is tripping over his size 34s…

Posted: 25th, August 2015 | In: Arsenal, News, Sports | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Watch the making of Moray McLaren’s gorgeous video for We Got Time

david wilson video

 

The video to Moray McLaren’s We Got Time features lovely animations. What you see is not reliant on modern cameras and computers. What you see is what was filmed.

 

 

Londoner David Wilson tells us how it was done:

All the animations seen in the music video were created in camera. No stopframe techniques, or computer super-imposing was used; what you see is what rolled off the camera. The animations in the side-on views were produced by the camera capturing the moving reflections from the mirrored carousels, and the animations in the top-down views were created by matching the cameras frame rate to that of spinning record. The transitions between each section of animation was created by simply cutting or wiping between the bits of footage.

And shows us:

 

 

Posted: 25th, August 2015 | In: Music, News, Technology | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Transfer Balls: Chelsea reduce their offer for Paul Pogba

Transfer Balls: Chelsea are all set to make a £72m, bid for France and Juventus player Paul Pogba, says the Daily Express.

 

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Readers may well wonder if Pogba is worth such a vast sumn After all, the Express has told us he’s worth far les. In a series of exclusives and plain balls, the Express has reported that Chelsea have offered as much as £86m and as low as £40m for the player they will today hope to sign for £71m.

 

August 22: £60m

 

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August 21: £86m

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August 20: £80m

The raid is £40m for John Stones plus £80m for Pogba.

 

Screen Shot 2015-08-25 at 07.52.13

 

 

August 6: £71m

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July: £40m

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Such are the facts.

 

 

 

 

 

Posted: 25th, August 2015 | In: News, Sports | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


The Human Centipede glass pipe for your hot box

human centipeded pipe 3

 

The Human Centipede pipe, by Dustin Yunker, is the ‘hot box’ tribute to the film of that name. We’re not sure what end goes to your lips; but our therapist assures us that which end you choose will say a lot about you.

 

human centipeded pipe 2

human centipeded pipe 1.

Spotter: DM

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Posted: 24th, August 2015 | In: Film, News, The Consumer | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Watch: Arsenal’s Petr Cech saves Arsenal – Liverpool saved by bad refereeing

On Petr Cech’s home Arsenal debut he gifted West Ham a 0-2 victory. Tonight against Liverpool he kept the Gunners in the game, keeping out a bending shot from Liverpool’s lively Philippe Coutinho with his fingertips.

And then against Benteke – who should really have scored:

At the other end, Arsenal scored a perfectly good goal wrongly adjudged offside:

Lucky Liverpool – again.

Posted: 24th, August 2015 | In: Arsenal, Liverpool, News, Sports | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Transfer Balls: Karim Benzema says Arsenal rumours are a joke

What news of Karim Beenzema’s transfer to Arsenal? The Metro says Arsenal are “set to lodge a £50m bid for his services”. Real Madrid’s French striker is “ready to accept a transfer to the Emirates”. The Daily Star hears a “Madrid insider” says Arsenal will take the player in “the next 48  hours”.

According to no less an authority than the Daily Star, Karim Benzema will arrive at Arsenal today. The Daily Telegraph told us he joined Arsenal two weeks ago.

The player has taken time out from his packing to tell fans that, er, it’s not happening, tweeting:

For all those clowns who want to make believe things at my fans. Here this is my home !

 

benzema arsenal laughs

 

Or as the Star, Metro and Daily Telegraph would surely put it: “Benzema looks for second home in Arsenal!”

 

Posted: 24th, August 2015 | In: Arsenal, News, Sports | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Naked and pregnant Amanda Palmer recreates Damien Hirst’s Verity in New York (photos)

palmer

 

Amanda Palmer is eight months pregnant and painted brightly as she recreates Damien Hirst’s Verity statue to promote the New York Public Library’s children’s book campaign. Father of the bump Neil Gaiman helps her down from the plinth.

 

palmer 1 palmer 2 palmer 3

 

Spotter: Maria Popova

Posted: 24th, August 2015 | In: Celebrities, News | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Paris train attack heroes get the Legion of Honour

heroes

 

It’s the greatet story of the year – the tale of three American tourists, a French banker, an American teacher living in Paris and a British ex-pat who took down heavily armed Ayoub El Khazzani, a Moroccan, on a train to Amsterdam.

Today France’s President Hollande awarded the Legion of Honour to Alek Skarlatos, Anthony Sadler, Spencer Stone and Chris Norman.

The young French banker who first accosted the gunman wishes to remain anonymous. Mark Moogalian, 51, a university teacher based in Paris, was shot in the back. When he leaves hospital, he too will receive the Legion of Honour.

Said Hollande:

“You have shown us that, faced with terror, we have the power to resist. You have given a message of courage, solidarity and hope.”

We? No. They did.

El Khazzani, had a Kalashnikov assault rifle. Mr Skarlatos tells us:

“If he knew what he was doing or even got lucky and did the right thing, he would have been able to operate through all eight of the [ammunition] magazines and we probably wouldn’t be here today along with a lot of other people.”

Mr Moogalian’s French wife, Isabelle Risacher, saw what happened:

“My husband threw himself on the man to take his Kalashnikov away. When my husband collapsed, I saw him through the seats. He looked at me and said: ‘I’m hit, I’m hit’. He said that it was all over and he was going to die. There was blood everywhere.  My husband is one of the heroes of this story and he nearly paid for it with his life. A few millimetres difference and his cartoid artery would have been sliced by the exiting bullet.”

He lived becasue Spencer Stone staunched the bleeding. Stone had been cut with a Stanley knife.

Posted: 24th, August 2015 | In: News | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Dismaland: Banksy’s authentic face of sarcastic rebellion

One of the elusive tickets to the Banksy show in Weston Super Mare which was visable on the Dismaland website but unpurchaseable for all of the day. See SWNS story SWBANKSY; The public flooded into Banksy's new pop-up exhibition  with some queuing for HALF A MILE to see the creation inside a derelict swimming pool. The graffiti artist's show, called 'Dismaland', a sinister twist on the Disneyland theme park with a remarkably similar branded logo, was revealed to 1,000 lucky locals. Residents, within a limited postcode, queued for more than half a mile, in a bid to exchange a voucher, printed in the local paper, for one of the golden tickets. The doors will open to the rest of the public today (Sat) though tickets for the sessions proved difficult to buy yesterday (Fri) due to the large amount of traffic to the website.

 

What do we think about Banksy’s Dismaland theme park in Western-Super-Mare’s Tropicana.? So edgy is it that before the great unwashed were allowed inside, there was a private party for stars and the rich who collect his work. Jack Black was there. Glastonbury Festival adminstrator Emily Eavis was there. Actor Nicholas Hoult was there.

You see. Edgy.

The brochure invites paying visitors (using actual coin of the realm and not Mickey Mouse money):

Are you looking for an alternative to the soulless sugar-coated banality of the average family day out?

Well keep looking, Average Family. Stay in the rain-mortared car and have a row.

Or just somewhere cheaper. Then this is the place for you—a chaotic new world where you can escape from mindless escapism. Instead of a burger stall, we have a museum. In place of a gift shop we have a library, well, we have a gift shop as well.

Bring the whole family to come and enjoy the latest addition to our chronic leisure surplus—a bemusement park. A theme park who’s big theme is: theme parks should have bigger themes…

They do. Banksy assures use that the big theme at Disney is globalism, free markets, capitalism, cheap travel, cheap protein and feminism- the princesses are always the stars. Disney also liked atomic bombs. How’s that for edgy? Walt sees your dystopian wasteland, Banksy, and raises you millions dead and nothingness.

This event contains adult themes, distressing imagery, extended use of strobe lighting, smoke effects and swearing. The following items are strictly prohibited: knives, spraycans, illegal drugs, and lawyers from the Walt Disney corporation.

Probably because soulless lawyers for Walt Disney’s would find this vision of Hell a welcome escape from the contents of the evil in their own heads.

It’s the authentic face of anti-consumerism as the London Dungeon is the authentic face of torture.

 

dismaland

 

Richard Jobson has been:

In addition to art you’ll also find functional a terrifying carousel, a mini golf park, a ferris wheel, and some ludicrously impossible fair games (like ‘topple the anvil with a ping pong ball’ by David Shrigley), roving occupy protests, and a Star Wars stormtrooper who sulks around the exhibition in a state of complete misery. The park is staffed by morose Dismaland employees who are uninterested in being helpful or remotely informative. Entrance to the event requires an uncomfortably awkward NSA-esque security screening, and of course you get to exit through the gift shop.Entrance to the event requires an uncomfortably awkward NSA-esque security screening, and of course you get to exit through the gift shop.

Brendan O’Neill writes:

Banksy has made a deathly Disneyland to mock our crass consumer tastes and the ease with which we can be distracted from important issues (like the MIGRANT CRISIS) by a few crumbs of crap leisure. As one of the numerous ecstatic media reviewers said — favourably — Dismaland is a reminder that ‘our fellow humans are a sham’…

Banksy is wildly successful because he regurgitates in sixth-former-style cynicism the prejudices of the chattering class: their agitation with the blob; their loathing for the little people’s material desires; their hatred of the super-rich; their concern for nature and its beasts if evil mankind doesn’t halt his destructive ways. A searing critic of capitalism? Please. Banksy is modern capitalism’s loss of faith in itself made flesh.

Waldemar Januszczak finds it “entertaining“:

The first thing you see when you walk in is a battered old television set on which the Disney film is about to come to an end. Cinderella has been to the ball. She has met her prince. He has tracked her down with the glass slipper. They are about to live happily ever after.

‘Entry-level anarchism’ in action

But wait. What is that light flashing on and off in the darkness beyond? Oh no. There has been a terrible accident. Cinderella’s coach has crashed, and some life-sized police have turned up to investigate. There is a body hanging out of the door. It is Cinderella. And is it just me, or does she not suddenly look a bit like Lady Di?

Using the language and methods popularised in theme parks, Banksy has built a full-scale alternative to Disneyland in which every ride, game and exhibit sets out to question not just the purpose of theme parks but also the crumbling, grotty state of modern Britain.

Mark Brown:

Works by 58 handpicked artists including Damien Hirst and Jenny Holzer have been installed across the 2.5-acre site. Julie Burchill has rewritten Punch & Judy to give it a Jimmy Savile spin. Jimmy Cauty, once part of the KLF, is displaying his version of a fun model village complete with 3,000 riot police in the aftermath of major civil unrest.

In one tent would-be anarchists can find out how to unlock the Adshel posters seen at bus stops. For £5 people can buy the tools to break into them, replacing the official posters with any propaganda they please. Is it legal? “It’s not illegal,” said the vendor…

Across the way is a “pocket money loans” shop offering money to children at an interest rate of 5,000%. In front of its counter is a small trampet so children can bounce up to read the outrageous small print drawn up by artist Darren Cullen.

Cullen said he had met so many people taking out payday loans who were well aware of how ridiculous the payback was. “As the welfare state is retreating the market is filling the gap in a really predatory way. People are being saddled with insane amount of debt for years.”

Like other artists involved, he has never met Banksy, but he was delighted to be part of the show.

“This place is brilliant. I only knew the minimum amount before I got here,” he said, “but it is so cool. It is just amazing having this much sarcasm in one place.”

And for £3 – the price of a ride on a fairground Dodgem – for teenagers bored with everything it’s worth a visit. Mums and dads, aka ‘the idiots’, it might be a tad dull.

Posted: 24th, August 2015 | In: Key Posts, News | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Transfer Balls: Benzema arrival at Arsenal delayed

benzema arsenal transfer

 

The Metro continues to report on rumours of Real Madrid’s Karim Benzema joining Arsenal. In the free paper’s race to make news from air, George Bellshaw writes about “Arseneal”:

Karim Benzema is reportedly ready to complete a transfer to Arsenal from Real Madrid… a deal worth £48million is believed to be on the cards that would see Benzema join Arsenal in the coming weeks.

Given that the transfer window shuts on September 1, weeks is too long.

Metro reader will also be shocekd by the news, having read in the trusty organ:

August 22: “Arsenal preparing to reveal Karim Benzema transfer at home to Liverpool”

Arsenal play Liveprool tinight.

Posted: 24th, August 2015 | In: Arsenal, News, Sports | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Arsenal bid for Bayer Leverkusen midfielder Lars Bender (just like every year)

Lars Bender Arsenal transfer

 

Arsenal wil make a bid of £18m for Bayer Leverkusen midfielder Lars Bender, says the Mirror. The paper’s scoop contains not a single fact, other than nerws that an Arsenal scout watched the German (and everyone other player on the pitch) in Bayer’s Champion’s League qualifier against Lazio.

Arsenal fans should realise that Bender to Arsenal is a annual favourite on the rumour mill.

 

November 2012, The Sun

MANCHESTER UNITED and Arsenal face a struggle to sign German star Lars Bender.

 

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September 2013, Daily Star

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May 2014, Daily Mirror

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July 2014, Daily Mail

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November 2014, Daily Express

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So Bender to Arsenal it is…

 

 

 

Posted: 24th, August 2015 | In: Arsenal, News, Sports | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Benedict Cumberbatch is ok: the Telegraph’s tawdry reporting on the death of Archie Lloyd in a holiday fight

Archie Lloyd

Archie Lloyd

Archie Lloyd, 18, was punched in Malia Crete, where he had been holidaying. His head hit the ground. Having refused help, he managed to get up and take a taxi to his hotel. He died in his hotel room. Archie Lloyd went to sleep and never woke up.

It is horrible story of young life ripped apart in moment of brutal stupidity.

But in the hands of the Press it becomes a story of money and privilege. This is how the Telegraph begins its report:

An 18-year-old Harrow-educated schoolboy has died….

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Posted: 23rd, August 2015 | In: News | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0