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TO Cannock Chase, where paranormal investigator Lee Brickley is on a case. He’s received an email telling of the ghost of a black-eyed child. Lee says the ghoul was first spotted in Staffordshire in the 1980s.
Now it’s front-page news:
In 2013, it was sighted again, by a mum and daughter out walking on Cannock Chase. As with previous sightings, the child “has coal-black pits for eye sockets”.
(Is coal-black still a relevant metaphore for the kids to get? How about as black as a jihadi’s flag? As black as balsamic vinegar? As black as Justin Bieber’s alter-ego?)
This is what she said she saw:
“We instantly started running towards the noise,” she said. “We couldn’t find the child anywhere and so stopped to catch our breath. That’s when I turned round and saw a girl stood behind me, no more than 10 years old, with her hands over her eyes.It was as if she was waiting for a birthday cake. I asked if she was OK and if she had been the one screaming. She put her arms down by her side and opened her eyes. That’s when I saw they were completely black, no iris, no white, nothing. I jumped back and grabbed my daughter. When I looked again, the child was gone. It was so strange.”
“MY intentions were never to cause any ill feelings or trouble. I feel it is an asset and enhances the area and I am aware that many people are enjoying its presence,” says Peter Nelson, 49, talking about the 9ft high crucifix at the top of a Workington slag heap.
THE Telegraph brings news that one in 10 bishops “could be secrely” gay. Or to put it another way, one in 10 bishops could not be secretly gay.
In the Telegraph, John Bingham reports that in his new book (More Perfect Union – Understanding Same-Sex Christian Marriage), Bishop Alan Wilson of Buckingham claims that almost 10% of Church of England bishops “might be gay”. The Bishop observes:
Particular attention sometimes falls on one vulnerable group with especially complex needs – gay Church of England bishops… By 2014 there were said to be a dozen or so gay bishops. By definition, these men are outstanding priests who have managed to navigate the complexities of a structurally homophobic institution well enough to become its iconic representatives. They may well have a bigger investment than others in keeping the closet door tightly shut…
Many who have publicly resisted same-sex marriage also have a dog in the fight arising from personal experience. This can arise from ambivalence or guilt about ways they have handled family members who have come out as gay, as well as their own sexualities… They have more on the line than some others. They also have greater status and security, but some of them may end up among the last people able to understand the need for change and bring it about. This can be expected to be the case especially for gay evangelical bishops, with their historically less well developed networks and support systems.
AN intrepid reporter went undercover to book a ‘Happy Ending’ massage:
“Any ‘rules’ restricting female sexuality are dying as fast as Sex and the City repeats can slay them, and it was only a matter of time before women embraced the notion that ‘quick releases’ aren’t just for men. . . . The bottom line: We like massages and we like orgasms, so why shouldn’t the two sometimes, er, come hand in hand?”
HONG Kong is a scene of anti-government protest. The FT:
The Chinese government faces its biggest challenge since Tiananmen, as tens of thousands of people on Monday joined the huge democracy protests in Hong Kong. Peaceful protesters poured into Admiralty – the scene of Sunday’s tense stand-off – on Monday after the Hong Kong government withdrew platoons of riot police whose use of tear gas generated sympathy for the demonstrators.
The BBC is live-blogging.
We know Donald Trump is a bit thick, but today he excelled himself… and that’s saying something.
In the past, he’s spat that Barack Obama isn’t a real American, demanding to see passports and all that, while back in the ’70s, he was accused of being a massive racist when he called for the death penalty in full page adverts of three black teenagers who were accused of raping a jogger, but exonerated. Oh, and in a book, John R. O’Donnell – former president of Trump Plaza Hotel & Casino – said that Donald once uttered that “laziness is a trait in blacks”.
This isn’t all old news though. Only last year, Trump tweeted that: “According to Bill O’Reilly, 80% of all the shootings in New York City are blacks-if you add Hispanics, that figure goes to 98%, 1% white”.
He’s also made wild claims that vaccines are related to autism, which has been proven to be a complete crock.
GUNS in America: Vaughan Foods Chief Operating Officer Mark Vaughan, a reserve sheriff’s deputy, had a handgun about his person when Alton Nolen beheaded Vaughan employee Colleen Hufford. He shot Nolen twice.
Nolen had brought a knife to a gun fight.
Will Vaughan’s actions increase support for ‘bring gun to work’ laws?
Moore Police Sgt. Jeremy Lewis told the Associated Press that Vaughan’s decision to carry a weapon to work made a big difference in the outcome of the attack. The situation ‘could have gotten a lot worse’ if Vaughan didn’t have this gun, said Sgt. Lewis. ‘This was not going to stop if [Vaughan] didn’t stop it.’”
THIS is just great. A CCTV operator has been convicted of voyeurism.
Ciaran McCleave, 51, of Newtownabbey, Northern Ireland, worked at Antrim Road police station. He spent 79 minutes over a 26-day period staring into the windows of a woman’s home. He spied on the woman for his own “sexual gratification”.Judge Ramsey QC said McCleave’s spying was a “flagrant and wilful abuse of the trust placed in you by the public as a CCTV operator”.
TURKEY is the model for the Arab Middle East, says Roger Scruton:
The Middle East is, as we are discovering, not one thing: on the contrary, it is a patchwork of communities whose peaceful coexistence depended on conditions that no longer exist. And many of those communities are in the habit of producing the two greatest scourges of the human race: young men without women, and puritanical rage …
Thanks to Ataturk polygamy was abolished in Turkey and women were encouraged to enter public life. Their status as the unspeakable ‘secret’ was removed, their faces were revealed, their soothing presence was everywhere perceivable. Thanks also to Ataturk the other great solvent of social tension – alcohol – was permitted and, while drunkenness is rightly viewed with anger all across the Middle East, the example of Turkey has helped many of those ancient communities to let their hair down and relax together over a bottle.
Remove wine and women, however, and the tension quickly escalates.
THE Mirror reports that “White Widow Samantha Lewthwaite” is “training ISIS female suicide bombers in Syria”. As ever, a British education is best.
Training a suicide bomber is easy. But picking a trainer is hard, given that the best coaches will have the fewest appraisals. Take a look at the Death Coach’s website:
‘Sam was a great suicide bomber coach. I’d recommend her to anyone keen in self-pebbledashing a market place or busload of families’ – Wasim.
‘Before Sam I was insecure and full of self-doubt. I’d failed by HND in business studies and the thought of another day stacking shelves in WH Smith’s filled me with a morbid dread. But with Sam’s guidance I came to realise that I truly was better off dead’ – Philip
‘The last words going though my mind were Sam’s advice to real inhale the vapours and count 100 paces before pressing the button on the jet pack’ – Buzz
BIG bellied men make the ebst lovers. Of course they do. Who wants to schtup a lump of gristle?
FAT sex experts atErciyes University in Kayseri, Turkey, tudeied 200 men. They wanted to link body mass index (BMI) and sexual performance.
WHAT is the power of nightmares?
Argentinian cartoonist has created the delicious What There Is Before There Is Anything There: A Scary Story.
CHEMICAL X turns pills into art.
Police Support Officer Jailed Over Gatwick Money Scam Gets Longer Sentence Than Thieving Politicians
THE most effective crimes are the simplest.
A police community support officer who conned air passengers out of thousands of pounds was told she will be separated from her baby as she was jailed for six-and-a-half years today. Alexis Scott told travellers departing from Gatwick that they could not take more than £1,000 in cash out of the country and even held out her hat for them to deposit money.
That is simply brilliant. Softened up by militaristic airport checks, warnings and fear, the uniform needs only ask one more thing: hand over your cash or be detained. Compliance is all.
The scam earned her £13,500.
CHRISTINA Briggs, 26, is fat. And flame-haired. She’s on benefits, too. Give her pair of NHS-supplied false breasts and a ciggie and Briggs would be the nation’s Aunt Sally with her own show on Channel 4. If she’s lucky, she could forge a career as Channel 5′s authentic face of the white working classes, like White Dee did with her stint on Celebrity Big Brother.
The Star leads with Briggs, the “25-stone SPONGER”.
WHEN Numan Haider was shot dead by police in Australia, to some he became a martyr. To other, he was an 18-year-old Islamist and IS fan who’d stabbed one policeman in the neck and slashed another.
Alyse Edwards repots for ABC on abuse spray-painted across the entrance to an Indonesian community mosque in Rocklea, Brisbane. The graffiti opines:
“Muslims are evil and have no respect for our ways”.
“IT’S certainly not something you see every day,” said Aristobulo Olivarez. “He’d been heckling their balloon bending magic act for some time and it seems they’d had enough.”
‘They’ are Minnie and Mickey Mouse, aka Fazzio and Ticiana Yanez, who were entertining people in a Madrid square. A heckler goaed them. Yanez had heard enough. He ripped off his Mickey Mouse head and went for the heckler. Minnie then waded in.
IDIOT cop shoots man who was reaching for his driving licence:
FRENCH railtway workers are striking for the right to booze on the job.
Eight workers with state railyway network SNCF are in trouble for supping a rum, lemon and pepper punch while operating signals and points on a line north of Paris.
(The pepper masks the small of alcohol on the breath.)
LIFE imitates The Day Today as the Metro brigns its take on war in the Middle East:
“Obama: It’s tiem for a war on war”
SO. How did newspapers report on the news that the Daily Mirror, Sunday Mirror and Sunday People titles had been hacking phones?
Is hacking still front-page news? Or is it only front-page news whan Rupert Murdoch’s titles are under the cosh?
WRITING in the Guardian, Nick Cohen writes:
Politics, journalism, the arts – they are all increasingly controlled by nice people from wealthy backgrounds. And their niceness is strangling us…
Lindsey Macmillan of the Institute of Education found that journalists used to come from families 6% better off than average, whereas now they come from homes that are 42% richer. Indeed, British journalists, the supposed tribunes of the people, now hail from wealthier backgrounds than, er, bankers, an awkward fact that ought to cause embarrassment all round. I look at my younger self today and wonder if he could become a journalist on a serious newspaper. My parents were teachers. They were comfortably off by the standards of 1980s Manchester, but they could never have afforded to rent me rooms in London and cover my expenses while I went from internship to internship. They had to look after my sisters as much as anything else.