I am Sorry about the picture , we didn’t realize it
We don’t just report off-beat news, breaking news and digest the best and worst of the news media analysis and commentary. We give an original take on what happened and why. We add lols, satire, news photos and original content.
Is the man accused of killing British backpacker Mia Ayliffe-Chung mentally ill? It’s the default position whenever anyone is killed in what could look like a racially-motivated attack. The Sun looks at Mia’s alleged killer, Smail Ayad, and wonders:
BACKPACKER KILLER’S ‘DEADLY OBSESSION‘ Deluded French knifeman killed British girl, 21, after ‘bizarrely claiming they were MARRIED and flying into a rage when she posed for a magazine’
Deluded. Obsessed. Bizarre. Rage. Mentally Ill?
All that follows an earlier headline:
Mia was killed in a brutal attack at a backpackers’ hostel in Queensland, Australia overnight, while three others are thought to have been injured.
The tenth paragraph of the Sun’s story contains another idea, previously delivered in headline form:
She was knifed in a frenzied attack in front of 30 horrified witnesses, while her attacker is alleged to have shouted “Allahu Akbar” during the ordeal.
Oddly, what first appeared as a ‘claim’ soon appears as a caption:
English backpacker Mia Ayliffe-Chung, 21, was knifed by a man shouting “Allahu Akbar” at a hostel in Australia
The BBC says:
A 30-year-old British man – named locally as Tom Jackson from Cheshire – was severely injured in the attack in Home Hill, Queensland, and is in a critical condition. A French suspect, 29, who allegedly said the Arabic phrase “Allahu akbar” during the attack, was arrested.
The Guardian: “Queensland stabbing: British woman killed by attacker who allegedly shouted ‘Allahu Akbar'”
Steve Gollschewski, a deputy police commissioner, said the alleged offender’s comments “may be construed as being of an extremist nature” and investigators were working with Australian federal police to establish his motives.
What motives are being considered?
But police were “not ruling out any motivations at this early stage, whether they be criminal or political”.
Investigators would also consider whether “mental health or drug misuse” issues were a factor in the attack alongside any “indication of an extremist slant or he was radicalised”, Gollschewski said at a press conference in Brisbane.
They don’t know why. But they know enough to narrow the field of investigation:
“This is not about race or religion, it is about individual criminal behaviour,” he said.
Is that a fact?
Friends of a British backpacker stabbed more than 20 times as he tried in vain to save the life of a young woman allegedly knifed by a Frenchman shouting “Allahu Akbar” at a north Queensland hostel are praying he recovers.
Up to 30 terrified witnesses at the Shelley’s Home Hill hostel 100km south of Townsville watched as Smail Ayad, 29, who had been singing the French national anthem, burst in crying “God is great” in Arabic.
Australian Federal Police are now investigating if the attacker has any link to any terror organisations…
In a press conference, deputy police commissioner Steve Gollschewski said the investigation was in its early stages and all motivations were being considered, including criminal and political, as well as the impact of drugs and mental health problems.
Always the mental health issues. Just Press f9 on the keyboard and everything is ok. (Unless you suffer from the horror of poor mental health and are being profiled as a potential knife attacker, in which case, it’s awful.)
The Sun: “FRESH HOPE FOR MADDIE? Brit cops may push for more government cash to help hunt for missing Madeleine McCann”
A questions mark. A story headlined “may”. No new facts. No news. This is the story since 2007, when the child vanished. The paper continues:
DETECTIVES investigating the disappearance of Madeleine McCann have “outstanding work” left to do on the inquiry and may apply for more Home Office funding.
Or, they may not. The word “may” appears in the headline versions of the same story on the Daily Express and Daily Telegraph websites.
The Sun adds:
In April, then-home secretary Theresa May granted the team £95,000 to keep the investigation going, with the cash expected to last until October. On Wednesday, Scotland Yard said it would talk to the Home Office about funding.
A force spokesman told the Press Association: “Whilst there remains outstanding work on this case, the Metropolitan Police Service will remain in dialogue with the Home Office regarding the continuation of funding.”
It’s a sad story with no sign of an end. But if not Madeleine, what could money be spent on?
Gloucestershire Live: “Family want Madeleine McCann-style woodland search for teenage relative who disappeared 20 years ago”
Madeleine McCann is the benchmark of all missing children.
Prime Minister Theresa May is coming under pressure to make missing schoolboy Damien Nettles the next Madeleine McCann so police can search a copse where his family have been told his body was buried 20 years ago.
Finite resources are being stretched.
Relatives in the Forest of Dean want police to carry out an official search of the woodland at the back of Gurnard Sailing Club on the Isle of Wight which has been named by some sources on the island as the ‘murdered’ teenager’s final resting place. And they have started a petition to force the Government to plough more money into solving the mystery of the 16-year-old who disappeared walking home from a party on November 2, 1996.
Some supporters have already started searching the woodlands with cadaver dogs, but the family believe they need the expertise of cold case murder squad forensic teams to either find his body or rule out the woodlands which are a few miles from where he vanished.
And they are hoping the petition will mean Damien’s case will attract extra funding for one last push in the same way as the Maddie McCann inquiry received an extra £12 million and Ben Needham inquiry was given £1 million so detectives could travel to Kos earlier this year.
Damien Nettles’ family have posted a petition online:
Please provide Hampshire Police with funding to find Damien Nettles remains
Damien Nettles aged 16 went missing 20 years ago in Cowes, Isle of Wight. His case remains a missing person despite a presumption of murder. Hampshire Police do not have the resources or funding to elevate this case. His family are desperate for justice and closure to move on. Thank you in advance.
You can read more about the disappearance here. Damien Nettles disappeared on November 2, 1996 when he was 16.
When did we become such prudes that a woman wearing too many clothes on the beach was a crime? The Telegraph:
French police made a woman remove her burkini on a Nice beach while another was fined in the resort of Cannes for wearing leggings, a tunic and a headscarf…
At which point the French rose up as one and cried aloud for liberty? No.
Along the coast in Cannes, a mother of two told AFP on Tuesday she had been fined on the beach for wearing leggings, a tunic and a headscarf. Her ticket read that she was not wearing “an outfit respecting good morals and secularism”.
France, place of enlightenment, now has a moral police police.
The BBC meets the woman who designed the cover-all:
Aheda Zanetti, who claims the trademark on the name burkini and burqini, said online sales were up by 200%… “I’m an Aussie chick, I’ve been here all my life,” she said. “I know what hijab means. I know what veil means. I know what Islam means. And I know who I am. I wanted my girls to grow up to have that freedom of choice. I don’t care if they want to have a bikini. It’s their choice. No man in this entire world can tell us what to wear or what not to wear.”
She gets it.
In “ARSENE WONGA”, the Mirror says Arsenal’s manger Arsene Wenger (geddit?!) “finally admits he treats the club’s money as if it was my own”. No, he’s not admitting to embezzlement. Wenger just says he’s cautions with spending tons of cash on players.
Of course, Wenger should spend, spend, spend because the Mirror has already told us this will be his last season at Arsenal.
Wenger has been quoted in Game Changers: Inside English Football, written by former Charlton boss Alan Curbishley: ”
“I personally believe the only way to be a manager is to spend the club’s money as if it were your own, because if you don’t do that you’re susceptible to too many mistakes. You make big decisions and I believe you have to act like it’s your own money — like you’re the owner of the club and you can identify completely with the club, because if you don’t do that I think you cannot go far.”
Some revelation there. At least it will be to the Mirror readers who didn’t see the paper’s story from one year ago:
Arsenal manager admits being tight with transfer cash because he feels club BELONGS to him
He has often been accused by his club’s frustrated fans of treating Arsenal’s money as if it is his own…. Now, for the first time, Arsene Wenger has unashamedly pleaded guilty to the charge and given a rare insight into the hurt he feels when his work is questioned at the Emirates Stadium.
As ever, Wenger was not talking with the Mirror, but with a magazine in France.
The Frenchman said: “I’ll give myself merit for one thing: I’ve always treated Arsenal as if it belonged to me. I have sometimes been criticised for it — because I am not enough of a spender, not carefree enough… My great pride will be to be able to say the day that I leave, that I am leaving behind a good team, a healthy situation and a club capable of performing in the future. I could have said to myself: ‘I am here for four or five years, we win everything’, [then] I leave and leave the club on the verge of bankruptcy. For me, consistency at the highest level is the true sign of great clubs.”
When he ‘admits’ it to the Mirror, that might be the end of the story.
Virgin Trains says Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn was mistaken when he complained about a “completely ram-packed” journey. In his video lament, Corbyn is sat on the floor between carriages.
Virgin has released CCTV images which appear to show Corbyn walking past empty unreserved seats, and later sitting in one.
We now await Her Excellency Dame Shami Chakrabarti to lead an investigation into whether or not there are empty seats on Corbyn’s trains and if Hitler was trying to dodge his fair by hiding in the toilets.
When the Sun led with news that Liverpool’s American owners had rebuffed Chinese attempts to buy the club we enjoyed the headline “You’ll Never Wok Alone”.
Readers were told that “Liverpool chiefs will reject moves from the Far East to buy a stake in the club”.
It all looked an exercise in PR. Liverpool’s foreign chiefs are much more in tune with the Reds than other foreigners who want to be chiefs. The club is in safe hands.
The Chinese are a “state-backed group called Everbright”, who “value the club at £700m”. Liverpool chairman Tom Werner, part of the Fenway Sports Group, says the club would work with the right partner and offers are made “just for the publicity”.
Today the Times has more.
Liverpool, or Liwupu as it is rendered in Chinese, has received admiring glances in China. Over the weekend it emerged that China Everbright, a state-backed investment company, was looking into making a bid with Amanda Staveley’s PCP Capital Partners.
You wonder how these things emerge?
The club has also caught the attention of Fosun and Dalian Wanda, Reuters reported yesterday. Both are Chinese conglomerates with a proven taste for western consumer brands with Chinese cachet, counting Club Med and a Hollywood studio among their most recent deals.
How depressing to have your beloved football club bracketed with Club Med and cinema chains.
Liverpool’s owners, Fenway Sports Group, insist that the club is not for sale despite the £800 million approach said to be in the works. However, leading figures have indicated that they would take a proposal for a minority stake seriously from investors who could open doors for the club commercially.
£700million has now become £800m. That figure could go up and up.
Nick Davis, chief executive of Memery Crystal, a law firm that advised on the sale earlier this month of West Bromwich Albion to Yunyi Guokai, said that Chinese interest in Liverpool was part of a trend established at the top of the Chinese hierarchy. Xi Jinping, the president of China who last year posed for a selfie with Sergio Aguero, the Manchester City striker, has said he wants China to become a “world football superpower” that could win the World Cup by 2050.
China buys Liverpool. China picks the Liverpool team?
David Shambaugh, a China expert at George Washington University, said that the explanation was partly domestic. “China has so much pent-up money looking to be invested abroad and the Premier League is a very sound financial investment,” he said. “It also offers excellent opportunities to expand China’s ‘brand’ abroad.”
An £800 million valuation for Liverpool compares with the £300 million paid by Fenway Group in 2010.
And what is China’s brand? Well, Amnesty International says:
A series of new laws with a national security focus were drafted or enacted that presented grave dangers to human rights. The government launched a massive nationwide crackdown against human rights lawyers. Other activists and human rights defenders continued to be systematically subjected to harassment and intimidation. Five women’s rights activists were detained for planning to mark International Women’s Day with a campaign against sexual harassment. Authorities stepped up their controls over the internet, mass media and academia. Televised “confessions” of critics detained for investigation multiplied. Freedom of religion continued to be systematically stifled. The government continued its campaign to demolish churches and take down Christian crosses in Zhejiang province. In the predominantly Muslim Xinjiang Uighur Autonomous Region, the regional government enacted new regulations to more tightly control religious affairs and ban all unauthorized religious practice. The government maintained extensive controls over Tibetan Buddhist monasteries. The UN Committee against Torture regretted that previous recommendations had not been implemented.
All very fit and proper.
Brendan O’Neill asks Corinne Grant a question:
The story is:
Cindy Prior, an indigenous administration officer in QUT’s Oodgeroo Unit, is using section 18C of the racial discrimination act – the controversial section that former Prime Minister Tony Abbott vowed to repeal – to sue three staff at QUT and five students.
Ms Prior claims she suffered “offence, embarrassment, humiliation and psychiatric injury” as well as ongoing fear for her safety, because of their actions and comments.
As The Australian has reported, the problems started when three students, who wandered into the Oodgeroo Unit in May 2013 looking for a place to use a computer, were asked by Ms Prior “whether they were indigenous”.
They said they were not, and she said there were other computers they could use.
She asked the students to leave the unit and they went away.
An hour later a Facebook page, called ‘QUT Stalker Space’, featured a post from one of the students, Alex Wood, saying: “Just got kicked out of the unsigned indigenous computer room. QUT (is) stopping segregation with segregation.”
Another student, Jackson Powell, wrote on the Facebook page: “I wonder where the white supremacist computer lab is.”
Another post — “ITT n—ers” — was attributed to another student, Calum Thwaites, who has emphatically denied that he had anything to do with the post.
Prior went to a doctor and was medically certified as unfit for work. Her initial doctor wrote: “Cynthia feels unsafe and frightened to return to work.”
Ten days after the students walked into the Oodgeroo Unit, a second doctor issued a workers’ compensation certificate declaring her unfit for work due to “nightmares, fear and sweating”. Four days later, Prior, who has not returned to the unit in the three years since the incident, told QUT she would be taking the matter to the Human Rights Commission. She felt “disheartened and powerless” because the university and its vice-chancellor, Peter Coaldrake, had made public statements about the incident and directed new strategies, which did not go far enough in her view. She felt “the critical issue of how to get me back to work and feeling safe once again” was being avoided.
…is suing the three students and the university for almost $250,000 in lost wages and general damages, plus future economic loss. She later claimed she felt unsafe leaving her home due to fears of being verbally abused and was unable to return to work in a role requiring face-to-face contact with white people.
So. About free speech. What does it cost?
New from India’s Mumbai Mirror. The language is as lovely as the story. The duplicitous talents of these guys who made false passports and government documents makes the news.
Two men, who worked in tandem faking government documents and scamming people, used their duplicitous talent to secure bail from a court in the Mumbai Metropolitan Region of Thane, India, last month. The duo, Bashir Mulla, 62, and Mohammed Lukman Shaikh, 48, managed to fool the court by securing bail through fake documents signed by non-existent police officers and guarantors. It is suspected that the lawyer who represented them in the court too was an impostor.
Thane police says there are no traces of the two.
Vijay Sanap, a constable attached to Srinagar police station in Thane, explains:
“I have to maintain a record of the accused granted bail by the court, do verification of witnesses by the police station and keep track of the dates of the cases. I knew the court had issued a bail order for the two accused last month but they could not be released as the verification of the guarantors was pending. There is a procedure where the witnesses’ record is checked and only then can the accused be released. This (the bail hearing) was on July 20,” said Sanap. He said, “After that, there was no mention of the case. Three days back, when I was going through the case diary.
“I saw a paper which said that both the accused had been released. The document was signed by senior inspector Kaarkar of Srinagar police station and submitted by one constable RS Patil. As I myself am attached to the same police station I know that there is no one called Patil there and also the name of the senior inspector was different. I enquired with the Srinagar police station and found out that the verification order had not yet reached them, and hence they had not yet approved the release order. They had no idea of the accused having been released.” Sanap then asked the police station to check the papers and then it dawned on all that the two guarantors who had signed the document were fake. The guarantors, Santosh Dongre and Sakharam Khude, were as non-existent as were the constable and the senior inspector who signed their release documents. Also the rubber stamps of the police station were fake.”
The duplicitous duo remain on the lam.
Is the media biased when it comes to reporting on Muslims? The BBC looks at the case of Michael Coe, accused of assault occasioning actual bodily harm and battery. He denies all charges.
The BBC: “Man ‘assaulted teens over cuddle’ in east London street”
The story begins thus:
A “bully” grabbed a schoolboy by the throat and called a teenage girl a “whore” after spotting them cuddling in east London, a court has heard. Michael Coe, 35, stopped driving and allegedly confronted the 16-year-olds, demanding to know if they were Muslims. When they lied and told him they were not, he grabbed the boy around the neck before throwing him to the floor.
Deep into the story, Mr Coe is identified as Muslim. But Islam is not given as key factor in the alleged crime.
The Sun: “ATTACKED FOR CUDDLING HIS GIRLFRIEND Muslim convert, 35, ‘grabbed teen by throat’ in London street over ‘cuddle’ with girlfriend.”
The tabloid makes the Islamic element key to the story. Mr Coe is a “Muslim convert”. Why he is billed as a “Muslim convert” and not simply a “Muslim” is, perhaps, worthy of attention. The Sun begins:
A MUSLIM convert grabbed a schoolboy by the throat and called a teenage girl a “whore” after spotting them cuddling in east London, a court heard.
Later on, readers are told:
Coe allegedly asked if the couple were Muslims – which they are – but they denied it because they were “worried what this defendant would do if they said yes”. At which point the defendant reportedly said: “Why am I wasting my time with you if you are not Muslim?”
The BBC does not include that exchange in its report.
The Evening Standard:
A Muslim “bully” attacked a 16-year-old schoolboy and branded his girlfriend a whore after spotting them cuddling in the street, a court heard today.
Prosecutor Jonathan Polnay described the attack as “completely unjustifiable”. He told the jury: “This case is about what started as unpleasant bullying with religious overtones in the street, followed by an attack by this 35-year-old man on a 16-year-old schoolboy.
“This was followed by a further assault on a schoolteacher, a nearby bystander, who came to his aid when he saw what was going on. The victim was, and is, a schoolboy and, in the early evening, he was there with his girlfriend standing on the pavement in the street, cuddling each other in the street. They had the misfortune that, of all the people to drive by, it was this defendant who was driving by in a car.”
The Newham Recorder:
It is foremost the story of an alleged “Muslim bully”.
The “Muslim convert” is in the dock.
The Asian Age:
The accused is simply a ‘man’.
Nowhere in the Asian Age’s report is Mr Coe identified as a Muslim. you could read this version and come way thinking it was an alleged attack by a man driven by anti-Muslim sentiment.
A “bully” grabbed a schoolboy by the throat and threw him to the ground because he saw him hugging a girl in the street, a court was told. Michael Coe, 35, was driving through east London when he spotted the two 16-year-olds cuddling on the pavement. He allegedly confronted the pair, demanding to know if they were Muslims, before calling the girl a “whore”.
Coe was said to have grabbed the boy by the throat, causing him to black out, before he woke up bleeding on the floor. When passing schoolteacher Boutho Siwela tried to come to the couple’s aid, Coe then allegedly attacked him.
Coe is on trial at Southwark Crown Court accused of assault occasioning actual bodily harm and battery.
Prosecutor Jonathan Polnay described the attack as “completely unjustifiable”. He told the jury: “This case is about what started as unpleasant bullying with religious overtones in the street, followed by an attack by this 35-year-old man on a 16-year-old schoolboy. This was followed by a further assault on a schoolteacher, a nearby bystander, who came to his aid when he saw what was going on. The victim was, and is, a schoolboy and, in the early evening, he was there with his girlfriend standing on the pavement in the street, cuddling each other in the street. They had the misfortune that, of all the people to drive by, it was this defendant who was driving by in a car.”
Coe demanded to know if the teenagers were Muslim and when they lied and said that they were not, he replied: “Why am I wasting my time with you if you’re not Muslim?”
He then called the girl “a whore” before attacking her boyfriend, Mr Polnay said.
“He (Coe) grabbed him around the neck, that’s the last thing the victim remembered,” he added. “The next thing the boy woke up on the floor and he was bleeding. This was completely unpleasant and utterly unwarranted – this is a grown man on a child.”
Mr Siwela heard the girl screaming and took a photo of Coe’s number plate as he was getting back into his car.
Mr Polnay continued: “The defendant wasn’t having that and he comes over to Mr Siwela and said give me that phone. Mr Siwela didn’t want to hand over his phone so the defendant grabbed him and threw him to the floor. He then got in the car and drove away.”
Coe denies the two charges against him. He admits assaulting the 16-year-old boy in Wilson Road, Newham, on April 15 but claims he was acting in self-defence.
The victim, who cannot be named because he is under 18, said he was hugging his girlfriend goodbye when Coe shouted “let that little schoolgirl go”.
He later demanded: “Why are you acting like a punk in front of your whore girlfriend?” before attacking the boy.
“Within seconds of saying that I felt a hand on my neck and after that I don’t remember anything else,” the teenager said.
“I woke up – there was blood on my hands and I could feel blood on my face, my head was throbbing and I was very dizzy and also felt sick.”
The trial continues.
Such are the facts.
Jamie’s Oliver’s fifth child is called River Rocket Oliver. With a name like Rocket, the worry is that the little lamb’s (lettuce) will go off. Nothing goes off like rocket.
PS – River Rocket is a brother to Poppy Honey Rose, Daisy Boo Pamela, Petal Blossom Rainbow and Buddy Bear Maurice.
PPS – There are few things more enjoyable than seeing other parents give their child a name that serves as a signifier of their individuality and cool.
Can you force refugees to work for the State? Surely not. The Mail looks to Austria:
Austria could be set to force refugees to do menial work for 87p an hour – or risk losing state handouts from the government.
It’s a populist idea in a country where racism is rife. Surely you cannot force asylum seekers to work?
Foreign minister Sebastian Kurz said many asylum seekers were ‘illiterate’ and should be made to carry out mandatory community jobs to help integrate them into society.
They can’t write their names? Let’s hope they know how to spell
Kuntz Kutz Kurz.
They would be required to work between 15 and 30 hours a week for just one euro an hour on work like street cleaning and municipal gardening, Kurz said.
Sebastian Kurz, 29, has been Austria’s foreign minister for the past two years. He is a member of the Austrian People’s Party’s (ÖVP).
MP Heather Wheeler, assistant whip in Theresa May’s government, bigs it up for Great Britain’s post-Brexit Olympians.
Or as the European Union put it:
Dod the British cheer for Australian swimmers? Do Belgian root for German cyclists? Does America always win?
Farewell, Gawker. Josh Laurito treats readers to a look inside Gawker, the media group bankrupted by the Hulk Hogan lawsuit verdict. Gawker media now consists of Gawker.com, the other titles being sold to Univision. Gawker will hang up its algorithms this week.
Since it’s not totally clear to me what will happen to the site’s archives or how long I will have access to data about the site, today seems like a good time to jot down some of the numbers we have about our writers, our community, and posts.
Footballers love to take photos of themselves in the changing room. The other day Middlesbrough’s Cristhian Stuani marked his side’s2-1 derby win over Sunderland in the Tees-Wear derby by showing the world a group shot featuring team-mate Adam Clayton’s left gonad.
Stuani later tweeted:
Transfer balls: With the business over Paul Pogba to Manchester United sorted to great relief at the Daily Mirror – the paper said Pogba had signed for United three weeks before he did – we look at Arsenal’s pursuit of Valencia’s German defender Shkodran Mustafi.
Daily Mirror, July 28:”Arsenal target Shkodran Mustafi has a release clause of €50million, MirrorFootball can reveal, but Valencia would sell him for half that as they look to recoup losses from missing out on the Champions League.”
Valencia are willing to sell a player worth €50million for €25million. That’s just over £21m.
Daily Mirror, August 11: “Muatfi has a £42m buy-out in his contract and Valencia are ready to accept around £30m, but Arsenal have yet to agree a fee”
Sorry, Arsenal. The fee’s gone up.
Daily Mirror, August 13: “Injury-hit Arsenal set to recall Mathieu Debuchy for Liverpool visit to fill in for trio of absent centre-halves.”
Arsenal have no need to buy anyone new. Debuchy to the rescue. (He was not picked.)
Daily Mirror, August 15: “Arsenal move for Shkodran Mustafi stalls as Valencia demand £25million for German defender”
Is that around £30m?
Daily Mirror, August 16: “Arsenal transfer news and rumours: Jeremy Mathieu emerges as Arsene Wenger’s top target.”
Arsenal no longer want Mustafi. It’s Mathieu for the Gunners.
Daily Mirror, August 17: “Arsenal are hoping to sign Mustafi for around £20million… Valencia have been holding out for closer to £30million for Mustafi.”
Wasn’t it £25m they wanted?
Daily Mirror: August 20: “Liverpool are in full negotiations with Valencia over the German’s availability and could beat the Gunners to the deal.”
Go for it, Liverpool. Arsenal don’t want him.
Daily Mirror, August 22: “Arsene Wenger has been quoted a staggering £50million for Valencia defender Shkodran Mustafi.”
And on its goes…
On July 16, 1969 Apollo 11 blasted into space. In this video the blast off is stretched from 30 seconds of action to over eight minutes of viewing time.
“The Saturn V vehicle produced a holocaust of flames,” says NASA.
In ‘LACK OF REMORSE'”, the Sun reports on “Love Island boob flash duo Jessica Hayes and Katie Salmon”.
News is that the topless twosome have been “banned for life from horse racing”. They will never ride a nag at Aintree nor enliven a dull day at Ascot by flashing their nipples. It is the sports great loss.
The paper adds that the pair “bared their boobs again at a nightclub just days after the Cheltenham incident in March”.
It is to their eternal shame that photographers were there to see both incidences.
The British Horseracing Authority says the ladies’ antics were “unacceptable, offensive and detrimental to the good reputation of the sport”.
Indeed they were. As anyone versed in Jilly Cooper’s work and the history of Lady Godiva, full nudity is the true form at the point to point. These ignorant girls must try harder.
And they’re orf!
What did Roald Dahl taste of? We can soon find out becsaue the 40FT Brewery, in Dalston, north east London, and Bompas and Parr are creating Mr Twit’s Odious Ale. You don’t have to be Twit to buy the stuff, just a hipster or some other kind of fetishising tw*t.
And apparently it’s what Dahl would have wanted:
With permission from The Roald Dahl Literary Estate and The Roald Dahl Museum in Great Missenden, Buckinghamshire, swabs were taken from the authors writing chair, preserved for posterity at the museum. The beer is to be brewed in the Polish Grätzen style.
Get Bucks the beer has “a light golden colour with relatively high carbonation”- like a runny fart.
So give me a bug and a jumping flea,
Give me two snails and lizards three,
And a slimy squiggler from the sea,
And the poisonous sting of a bumblebee,
And the juice from the fruit of the ju-jube tree,
And the powdered bone of a wombat’s knee.
And one hundred other nasty things as well
Each with a rather nasty smell.
I’ll stir them up, I’ll boil them long,
A mixture tough, a mixture tough, a mixture strong.
And then, heigh-ho, and down it goes,
A nice spoonful (hold your nose)
Just gulp it down and have no fear.
‘How do you like it, Granny dear?’
Will she go pop? Will she explode?
Will she go flying down the road?
Will she go poof in a puff of smoke?
Start fizzing like a can of Coke?
(I’m glad it’s neither you nor me.)
Oh Grandma, if only you knew
What I have got in store for you!’
Dalian Atkinson: a look at repotting on the former Aston Villa footballer who died after being hit by police tasers.
The Guardian: “Dalian Atkinson death asks hard questions of police and football”
Can football be blamed for one man’s death in unusual circumstances?
Death of former Aston Villa striker focuses spotlight on Taser use, racial stereotyping and support for ex-professionals
Are we in danger os stereotyping the police? Atkinson was black. Press TV, the biased Iranian broadcaster, leads with: “Two British police officers are under criminal investigation over the death of black English footballer Dalian Atkinson.” The Guardian has linked Atkinson’s death to the Black Lives Matter movement.
For the past year, the 48-year-old had been receiving hospital treatment for a serious liver and kidney condition, with his family making increasingly desperate pleas for help from the football community.
What is the football community? Atkinson played for Ipswich Town, Sheffield Wednesday, Aston Villa, Manchester City, Real Sociedad, Metz, Fenerbahçe, Al-Ittihad, Daejeon Citizen and Jeonbuk Hyundai Motors. Manchester City, for one, are not exactly hard up. The BBC says “Sociedad fans applauded throughout the ninth minute as a tribute to their former striker Dalian Atkinson.” A sign behind the Aston Villa dugout reads: “Dalian Atkinson – Never Forgotten.”
Geoff Scott, the CEO of the football welfare charity Xpro Life After Sport, told the Guardian that Atkinson’s family had sought financial assistance for his medical care and wanted help to move him to a private hospital.
The charity could not help. But the Professional Footballers’ Association arranged his travel to hospital for more than a year. Atkinson spoke personally to Gordon Taylor, the PFA chief executive, last Friday.
He had been due to see a specialist on Monday, the day he died after being Tasered by police on his father’s doorstep in the quiet Telford suburb of Trench, in Shropshire.
The paper then sees fit to add:
Neighbours have described how Atkinson, who also played for Ipswich Town and Sheffield Wednesday, pulled up outside his father’s house in his Porsche 4×4 around midnight on Sunday.
Nice car. Sounds pricey. But why mention the make and model?
The Sun does the same:
The retired striker, who drove a Porsche, had spells with Ipswich, Sheffield Wednesday and Manchester City and joined Villa for £1.6million in July 1991.
The Birmingham Mail: “Dalian Atkinson new witness: Ex striker was struck with a baton after being tasered”
It has been reported that Atkinson had stumbled towards officers shouting, “I am the Messiah”, before a Taser, capable of 50,000 volt shocks, was used.
We hear from Dave Lewis, who lives across the road from Dalian Atkinson’s father. He says:
“It’s very easy to be wise after the event, but everything had to be done in a split second. The officer who used the Taser had a very difficult decision to make.”
It is. That’s why police are trained to make the right decision.
In the Sun “a man who claimed to be Dalian’s nephew, Fabian Atkinson” says:
“If the police are turning up to a scene where someone is having an argument, they have to be prepared to calm that person and not just go straight for the taser. As soon as you deploy the taser they have to call an ambulance straight away, and try to find out the person’s medical history.
“My uncle was having kidney dialysis, which would have made his heart weaker. The police knew nothing about that. How can they taser someone without calling an ambulance first?”
Is is because “everything has to be done in a split second”? As we wonder why the Sun bothered with that quote, the Birmingham Mail returns to Dave Lewis:
His account differs dramatically from that of another witness, described as a neighbour in national newspapers… Mr Lewis, who lives directly opposite, says he saw one officer draw back a foot as if to land a kick but, if that was the intention, he says it was never carried out. Despite reports that the Taser was used five times on 48-year-old Atkinson, he only saw it used once.
But she heard “boots kicking him”. Mr Lewis:
“His dad let him in and the police came. There was a policeman and a policewoman, no blue lights, and one backed away. It was one-to-one with the other officer. If I was that police officer, I’d have a very difficult decision to make. He was approaching the policeman. If someone rushes at you and they’ve already smashed a door in and the state they are in… well, you’ve got a difficult decision to make.
“I didn’t see the other officer touch him with a boot. The officer did draw a baton, though, and hit him with the baton. Right after that, the sky went blue with the lights from all the police cars and vans.”
Daily Mail: “Dalian Atkinson: The tragic final days of Aston Villa hero who died after being Tasered by police”
Sportsmail can reveal that the Dalian Atkinson struck by the 50,000-volt weapon was a fragile, ill man, suffering not only from kidney and liver problems but also from pneumonia, who had become convinced that only a doctor across the Atlantic could help him.
The Times: “The tragic silence of Atkinson’s final years”
He had arrived at the house that he had bought for his parents in Meadow Close, Telford, in the early hours of Monday morning. According to his father, Ernest, and his brother, Kenroy, he claimed that he had already killed his siblings and attempted to throttle his father. Kenroy told The Sun that his brother was “in a manic state and depressed, out of his mind and ranting, not in his right mind.” Ernest said he “did not know if he was drunk, or on drugs”.
A neighbour called the police, concerned “for the safety of an individual”. When officers arrived, they struck Atkinson with a Taser, reportedly on as many as three occasions.
And before that.
Atkinson got in contact with the Professional Footballers’ Association (PFA), the body that looks after players during and after their careers. He applied to their benevolent fund for help covering rent. On his behalf, they struck a deal with his landlord that he would pay three months’ rent but be allowed to stay in New Woodhouses for six.
Football did not let Dalian Atkinson down. That narrative is too simple.
Presented her Olympic gold medal by the same organisation that will look to restrict her future in the sport, Caster Semenya stood on top of the podium and smiled broader than ever before.
The finest 800m runner the world has seen for almost decade, there was little doubt that she would depart these Rio Olympics with a gold medal round her neck.
There were three people in that race with what can be termed ‘intersex’ characteristics.
AP says the “result that will only stoke the complex debate over whether women with much higher levels of testosterone than normal should be allowed to compete unchecked.”
Do women who have much higher levels of natural testosterone than normal have an advantage over other women in athletics, and if so, is it unfair?
The athlete said in 2010:
“I have been subjected to unwarranted and invasive scrutiny of the most intimate and private details of my being. Some of the occurrences leading up to and immediately following the Berlin World Championships have infringed on not only my rights as an athlete but also my fundamental and human rights.”
No one is accusing Semenya of using illicit substances. Quite the opposite: Some have suggested she should be taking drugs in order to bring her hormone levels more closely in line with those of average women.
Semenya was raised and identifies as female. But according to a leaked medical test, Semenya’s testosterone levels are three times as high as those of most women, and she has internal testes instead of ovaries.
Is surgery the solution? The New York Times:
At the London Olympics, four female athletes, all 18 to 21 years old and from rural areas of developing countries, were flagged for high levels of natural testosterone. Each of them subsequently had surgery to remove internal testes, which produce testosterone, as well as procedures that were not required for resuming competition: feminizing vaginoplasty, estrogen replacement therapy and a reduction in the size of the clitoris.
Olga Khazan wonders:
Still, it’s not considered unsportsmanlike to simply be strange-looking. Countless Olympians are celebrated for unorthodox features that give them an edge in their sports. Much has been made of Michael Phelps’s preternatural wingspan and ultra-flexible feet that turn into “virtual flippers.” Biostaticians have said Usain Bolt’s 6-foot-5-inch height and fast-twitch muscle fibers make him perfectly suited to sprinting. Other athletes have less obvious advantages, like high levels of hemoglobin or diminutive heights tailor-made for tumbling passes.
What to do? Can you make a new division of competition: men, women and intersex?
Jeremy Warner should bone up on low culture. He’s writing about Brexit for the Telegraph:
The image that springs to mind is the cartoon character Road Runner, who keeps on running long after he’s left the edge of the cliff as if still on firm ground, only to look beneath him, realise he’s motoring on thin air, and plunge into the void.
No. The EU are Brexit voters seeing the chance to escape. The trapper is Wile E Coyote. Or is it the other way around?
Media Watch: a look at monocular football reporting. In today’s match we look at biased views on Arsenal’s away draw at Leicester City. The game ended o-0.
THE PENALTY CLAIMS
Leicester City…can feel aggrieved they weren’t awarded a late penalty. Hector Bellerin appeared to trip substitute Ahmed Musa inside the penalty area but referee Mark Clattenburg, who had earlier waved away City’s appeals for a penalty after Danny Drinkwater went down in the area, again said no.
Should it have been a penalty, or two?
There was drama on 42 minutes after Drinkwater appeared to have been tripped by Koscielny as he burst into the box following Cech blocking a Vardy burst, but referee Mark Clattenburg decided it was a fair challenge – much to the displeasure of the vociferous home fans and their execrable paper clappers that seem to be needlessly encroaching on our game. It has to be said the referee made the right decision – just.
Only one penalty claim is mentioned.
Drinkwater claimed a penalty, but replays suggested Mark Clattenburg made the right call.
No mention is made of the second penalty claim.
The loose ball fell to Danny Drinkwater, and while the midfielder appeared to be tripped by Laurent Koscielny in the area, there was nothing given.
A draw is probably the right result overall, though Leicester should certainly have had a penalty in the 88th minute.
Leicester City had two penalty appeals turned down – one in the first half, which he [the referee] got right by ruling that Koscielny poked the ball away from the feet of Drinkwater. But in the second half he got it horribly wrong. Substitute Musa skipped past Bellerin and the Spanish defender brought the winger down with a clumsy challenge.
The Star was watching a different match:
Shame referee Mark Clattenburg got booed off by home fans. He’d hardly put a foot wrong but has to be said his decision to turn down penalty appeals when Musa was clipped by Holding near the end, looked dubious.
Such are the facts.
Media Watch: a look at monocular football reporting. In today’s match we look at biased views on Liverpool’s away defeat to Burnley. The game ended 2-0.
Ragnar Klavan’s cross-field pass didn’t do Nathaniel Clyne any favours and as Burnley pressed, the full-back coughed up possession cheaply.
Nathaniel Clyne, Liverpool’s England full-back, was badly at fault, with a poor pass deep in his own half finding only Gray who, in turn, fed Vokes.
Gray picked up the pieces from Nathaniel Clyne’s poor pass, fed the ball in to his strike partner and, with Dejan Lovren or Ragnar Klavan not even in close proximity, Vokes swept the ball beyond Simon Mignolet from the edge of the box.
Nathaniel Clyne’s pass infield from the right flank was stolen by Gray…
Clyne was not at fault. Clyne was robbed!
Media Watch: a look at monocular football reporting. In today’s match we look at biased views on Watford’s home defeat to Chelsea. The game eded 1-2.
THE WINNING GOAL
The difference was to be two mistakes. Heurelho Gomes let a Eden Hazard shot squirm away from his body which substitute Michhy Batshuayi pounced on for the equaliser and with three minutes of normal time remaining, a poor pass from Adlene Guedioura was seized on by Cesc Fabregas and within seconds Diego Costa had netted the winner.
A poor pass and a mistake led to the second Chelsea goal, says the Watford local newspaper.
Fabregas was the instigator, winning possession on the edge of his own box and instantly threading a beautiful, bending pass that sent Diego Costa racing clear. The striker kept his cool as he bore down on goal, slipping his shot under Gomes and putting the Blues ahead very late on. He was quick to thank Cesc for the stunning through ball.
A great pass and cool led to the second Chelsea goal, says the Chelsea FC website.
THE NEW PLAYERS
Yet, as if they were Hertfordshire’s most ardent Trotskyists, Watford exist in a state of permanent revolution and yet more change is afoot: before kick-off new arrivals Younes Kaboul and the Argentine winger Roberto Pereyra were paraded to muted delight.
An already upbeat atmosphere was lifted when new signings Roberto Pereyra and Younes Kaboul were paraded on the pitch before kick-off
Such are the facts.
Transfer balls: The BBC says Everton striker Romelu Lukaku, 23, “will turn down Chelsea to stay at Goodison Park for at least another season”.
The BBC claim links to the Daily Mirror, which is adamant:
Romelu Lukaku is staying with Everton… The news is a massive boost for new boss Koeman.
All good news, then, for Everton fans. Much better than when the Mirror told them:
29 Jul 2016 – “Chelsea closing on transfer of Everton’s Romelu Lukaku as Toffees accept the striker wants Stamford Bridge return.”
27 June 2016 – “Arsenal transfer news and rumours: Romelu Lukaku wants Gunners move – but is the price too high?”
Chelsea have had a £57million bid for Romelu Lukaku rejected by Everton – but are confident of agreeing a deal to re-sign him this summer. The two clubs are haggling over a fee, with the Toffees holding out for a club-record £75million. But they have finally accepted the 23-year-old striker is determined to rejoin the club they bought him off two years ago.
All wrong. Lukaku is a Toffee.
But hold on. The BBC has more news:
But Koeman has admitted that he is preparing a Plan B, in case the Belgium forward leaves the club.
That story links to the Daily Mail, which says:
Everton are planning for life without Romelu Lukaku in the eventuality their striker departs this month. Chelsea are heavily interested in the 23-year-old and Ronald Koeman has targets lined up should they bow to a mega offer, as with John Stones and Manchester City.
Such are the facts.