Anorak » News http://www.anorak.co.uk Pop culture, news, sport and an off-beat take on the mainstream Thu, 24 Apr 2014 21:19:35 +0000 en-US hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.8.2 Housing Association Valleys to Coast in Bridgend Offers Bedroom Tax Victims A Free Creme Egg http://www.anorak.co.uk/395489/money/housing-association-valleys-to-coast-in-bridgend-offers-bedroom-tax-victims-a-free-creme-egg.html/ http://www.anorak.co.uk/395489/money/housing-association-valleys-to-coast-in-bridgend-offers-bedroom-tax-victims-a-free-creme-egg.html/#comments Thu, 24 Apr 2014 20:18:38 +0000 http://www.anorak.co.uk/?p=395489 HOW was the bedroom tax for you? Did you manage to save for your next egg? Did you keep up with payments? The Housing association Valleys to Coast in Bridgend thanks you for fighting on through the austerity crisis by sending you a letter in the post and the chance to pick up a 60p ‘Creme Egg’.

Locals are welcome to take their own (rotten) eggs round to the Money Matters team and return the favour.

cream egg bedroom tax Housing Association Valleys to Coast in Bridgend Offers Bedroom Tax Victims A Free Creme Egg

Spotter: Felicity Morse ‏@FelicityMorse  7h

 

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1966: When Harry Roberts Killed Coppers And A Dalek Looked The Other Way http://www.anorak.co.uk/395463/keyposts/1966-when-harry-roberts-killed-coppers-and-a-dalek-looked-the-other-way.html/ http://www.anorak.co.uk/395463/keyposts/1966-when-harry-roberts-killed-coppers-and-a-dalek-looked-the-other-way.html/#comments Thu, 24 Apr 2014 18:17:48 +0000 http://www.anorak.co.uk/?p=395463 PA 1218017 1966: When Harry Roberts Killed Coppers And A Dalek Looked The Other Way

The three London police officers shot and killed in Braybrook Street, West London. From left: PC Geoffrey Roger Fox, 41; Temporary Detective Constable David Stanley Bertram Wombwell, 25, and Detective Sargent Christopher Tippet Head, 30

 

ON 12 Dec 1966, Harry Roberts, John Witney and John Duddy were convicted of the murders of David Wombwell, Christopher Head and Geoffrey Fox.

 

PA 10285717 1966: When Harry Roberts Killed Coppers And A Dalek Looked The Other Way

Oblivious of the drama that was going on, a small bow hiding his identity under a Dalek suit, was among the very few spectators as John Edward Witney was ushered out of the West London Magistrate’s Court. The boys just went on playing their games.
Date: 31/08/1966

 

The murders were known as the Shepherd’s Bush murders as well as the Massacre of Braybrook Street.

 

shpherds bush murders 1966: When Harry Roberts Killed Coppers And A Dalek Looked The Other Way

The crime scene, featuring the Q-car and body of DS Christopher Head lying in the road

 

On 12 August 1966:

Harry Roberts, John Witney and John Duddy were sitting in a Standard Vanguard estate preparing for a robbery when 3 unarmed policemen in plain clothes – David Wombwell, Christopher Head and Geoffrey Fox – pulled up near them in a Triumph 2000 Q-car, and started asking questions about their insurance and MOT.

 

PA 18241418 1966: When Harry Roberts Killed Coppers And A Dalek Looked The Other Way

The latest British car – the Triumph 2000, a four-door five-seater saloon – at the Motor Show at Earls Court in London.
Date: 15/10/1963

 

Because they were carrying guns and thought were would be arrested they shot the policemen dead and drove off. A local resident made a note of the van number plate and they were later caught.

 

PA 3565278 1966: When Harry Roberts Killed Coppers And A Dalek Looked The Other Way

Screens surround the crime scene and a policeman stands guard. The officers, cruising in a police car were shot when they stopped to question men in another car. In the background is Wormwood Scrubs prison. Date: 13/08/1966

 

The hunt for the killers was on:

 

PA 1224305 1966: When Harry Roberts Killed Coppers And A Dalek Looked The Other Way

PA 3565249 1 1966: When Harry Roberts Killed Coppers And A Dalek Looked The Other Way

A small boy and a mother holding her baby look on today as police talk to the householders at the scene of the killing of three policemen by gunmen. Policemen have left their helmets in the road while they seek clues to the killers.

 

The Independent recalled the murders:

As two of the officers started to search the van, Roberts drew a 9mm Luger pistol and shot DC Wombwell through the left eye, and then shot DS Head in the back as he tried to flee. As the dying officer staggered away Roberts tried to shoot him in the head, but his gun jammed twice.

PC Fox had remained in the police car. Duddy fired a revolver at the officer twice from close range through the passenger window. Both bullets missed, but a third shot hit him in the left temple. The shot caused the policeman’s foot to push down on the accelerator and the car jumped forward, running over the body of DS Head and getting stuck there, with smoke pouring from its rear wheels. All three Metropolitan Police officers died from the gunshot wounds.

 

 

harry roberts 1966: When Harry Roberts Killed Coppers And A Dalek Looked The Other Way

 

Roberts went on the run, hiding on Epping Forest.

 

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It took 96 days before he was caught after one of the biggest manhunts the British police had mounted.

 

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Mr William Morris, 61, standing near the hay barn on his farm, Blounts Farm, near Bishops Stortford, Herfordshire, where Harry Roberts is thought to have spent the night before his capture. Farmer Morris said he had driven the captured man to Bishop Stortford after his arrest by two armed police sergeants.

 

Roberts knew how to hide. He would later say:

“I was a sergeant and we used to go out on ambushes in the jungle. I would fire the first shot and then everyone would blast away… When I returned to Britain, I took up my old life as a criminal. I teamed up with Witney and we did dozens of armed robberies together – on betting shops, post offices. The most I earned was £1,000 from a single job. Witney was the eldest, the boss: he knew the best places to rob. Duddy joined us later…

“I was only caught because I was stupid. I had been trying to break open a safe at a * * factory and was late getting back to my camp. I had to cross a main road and had a blue holdall with me – no one in the country had a bag like that.”

PA 1774692 1 1966: When Harry Roberts Killed Coppers And A Dalek Looked The Other Way

The police sergeants Peter Smith (left) and Oswald Thorne who found Harry Roberts in a storage hanger some 300 yards from Thornley Woods near Bishop Stortford, Hertfordshire. Date: 15/11/1966

 

All three were sentenced to life in prison. 

John Duddy died in Parkhurst prison on 8 February 1981.

John Witney was released in 1991.

 

PA 11126607 1966: When Harry Roberts Killed Coppers And A Dalek Looked The Other Way

Police and members of the public line Uxbridge, London, as a procession of 14 cars brings the three coffins of the policemen, shot on the 12th August, to St. Stephens Church for the funeral service.

 

Roberts lives. In 2004, he spoke to the media. He had served 30 years and wanted parole:

“I don’t want to be Harry Roberts the cop killer. The media talk as if the shootings were yesterday: this keeps alive this image of me as a 30-year-old cop killer. I’m not that person any more. The Home Secretary is just responding to the media hype about me. When does punishment becomes vengeance? I feel my treatment has turned into institutionalised vengeance.”

 

 

His time in prison had not been uneventful:

 

Screen shot 2014 04 24 at 18.09.01 1966: When Harry Roberts Killed Coppers And A Dalek Looked The Other Way

The Times, March 30, 1973

 

In 2009, The Mail alleged that Roberts was no victim:

In April, The Mail on Sunday exclusively revealed how from his cell Roberts orchestrated a five-year campaign of intimidation against Joan Cartwright, 65, and her son, including horrific attacks on her animals. Mrs Cartwright works at an animal sanctuary in the Midlands, where Roberts worked on day release from Sudbury open prison.
When she secretly complained about his behaviour, he was moved from an open prison to a closed one.

But he then initiated his hate campaign in a bid to stop Mrs Cartwright and her son giving evidence against him at a parole hearing. The triple murderer rang Mrs Cartwright up to five times a week for nearly four years from Channings Wood prison in Devon.

The calls included terrifying veiled threats that coincided with the attacks on her animals. In the worst incident, a horse’s head was hacked at with an axe the night before Mrs Cartwright and her son were due to give evidence.

Another of Mrs Cartwright’s horses had to be put down days after her husband Peter had resisted giving Roberts a character reference. Other assaults between 2002 and 2006 led to a horse losing an eye; a donkey dying after its pelvis was shattered, probably with a baseball bat; the family’s pet cat being electrocuted, and a peacock being strangled.

Roberts also coerced Mrs Cartwright to visit him in jail, so he could repeat his threats to her face.

Not nice. But Roberts’ is a folk hero to some, well at least to those who want to cock a snook at the cops. His name continues to be evoked in song:

“Harry Roberts is our friend, is our friend, is our friend / Harry Roberts is our friend, he kills coppers.”

 

 

The band Chumbawamba replaced Hare Krishna with a tribute to Harry Roberts:

 

 

You can buy a Harry Roberts T-shirt:

 

Screen shot 2014 04 24 at 17.35.10 1966: When Harry Roberts Killed Coppers And A Dalek Looked The Other Way

 

And you can watch the TV show of the novel:

 

he kills coppers 1966: When Harry Roberts Killed Coppers And A Dalek Looked The Other Way

The Times reviews:

He Kills Coppers, confidently adapted by Ed Whitmore from the Jake Arnott novel, is based on the story of Roberts, a small time, semi-deranged crook who knew how to use guns because he had handled them in the Army.

 

 

The Times again:

He Kills Coppers is superior, feel-the-lining-on-this stuff – bafflingly good for ITV1. Spall is a low, sure, hypnotic note – a cocksure, slightly bent rookie detective in 1966; all fags, Brylcreem and tarts. The great casting continues with the mesmeric Kelly Reilly as a prostitute who is both fragile and brassily capable: a certain kind of working-class girl you got in “the olden days”, who was a feminist before feminism was invented

After the deaths come the myth and the glamour…

Spotters: National Archives, Black Kalendar

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1973: Dolly Parton’s ‘Jolene’ Played At 33 RPM Reveals An Unexpected Secret http://www.anorak.co.uk/395443/strange-but-true/1973-dolly-partons-jolene-played-at-33-rpm-reveals-an-unexpected-secret.html/ http://www.anorak.co.uk/395443/strange-but-true/1973-dolly-partons-jolene-played-at-33-rpm-reveals-an-unexpected-secret.html/#comments Thu, 24 Apr 2014 13:25:59 +0000 http://www.anorak.co.uk/?p=395443 jolene 33 1973: Dolly Partons Jolene Played At 33 RPM Reveals An Unexpected Secret

 

IN 1973, Dolly Parton released the song Jolene. It would become a smash hit.

Mark Wigmore gives some background to the great song:

There are several myths and legends about Dolly Parton’s song “Jolene.” It’s been said that the song is about a bank teller who had been flirting with her husband. There’s another story about a ten-year-old girl named Jolene who asked Parton for her autograph after a concert. But the real story is that of Parton striking out on her own after parting ways with her long-time mentor, Porter Wagoner...

 

PA 8638002 1973: Dolly Partons Jolene Played At 33 RPM Reveals An Unexpected Secret

Country music singer Porter Wagoner is shown in West Plains, Mo., Sept. 25, 1971.

 

Jolene was her first single after Dolly made the decision to embark on her solo career. It was released in October of 1973 and reached the number one position on the country charts in the U.S. and Canada in February of ’74. It was also her first song to cross over to the pop charts. “I Will Always Love You” followed suit a few months later. By the middle of 1975, Dolly had five number one hits in a row and a bona fide superstar was born.

 

PA 6744817 2 1973: Dolly Partons Jolene Played At 33 RPM Reveals An Unexpected Secret

American singer Dolly Parton arrived at Heathrow airport to take part in the eighth International Festival of Country Music at Wembley. Date: 16/04/1976

 

But did you know that when played at 33 RPM, it sounds like this:

 

 

Spotter: Fraser Nelson

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1984: New York Subway Commuters Giggle At Nude Walter Mondale On A Penthouse Magazine Cover http://www.anorak.co.uk/395437/news/flashback/1984-new-york-subway-commuters-giggle-at-nude-walter-mondale-on-a-penthouse-magazine-cover.html/ http://www.anorak.co.uk/395437/news/flashback/1984-new-york-subway-commuters-giggle-at-nude-walter-mondale-on-a-penthouse-magazine-cover.html/#comments Thu, 24 Apr 2014 12:17:26 +0000 http://www.anorak.co.uk/?p=395437 FLASHBACK to May 12, 1984:

Subway commuters point to a poster sporting a caricature of a nearly nude Walter Mondale that promotes the current issue of Penthouse Magazine at a Times Square Station in New York. CBGB, the birthplace of punk rock, is gone. No longer can visitors to Coney Island plunk down a few coins to play the unsettling attraction called “Shoot the Freak.” And seedy, edgy, anything-might-happen Times Square? These days, it’s all but childproof. Around countless corners, the weird, unexpected, edgy, grimy New York _ the town that so many looked to for so long as a relief from cookie-cutter America _ has evolved into something else entirely: tamed, prepackaged, even predictable. (AP Photo/Jim Lukoski, File)

PA 10073882 1 1984: New York Subway Commuters Giggle At Nude Walter Mondale On A Penthouse Magazine Cover

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Are You Having Sex For The Required 7 Minutes? http://www.anorak.co.uk/395392/news/are-you-having-sex-for-the-required-7-minutes.html/ http://www.anorak.co.uk/395392/news/are-you-having-sex-for-the-required-7-minutes.html/#comments Thu, 24 Apr 2014 12:01:56 +0000 http://www.anorak.co.uk/?p=395392 orgasm Are You Having Sex For The Required 7 Minutes?THE latest from yet another of that long line of “sex doctors” who would tell us all how to do it. Which is that you might be having sex that average number of times, two or three times a week, but you might also not be having sex for long enough. For, amazing though this might be to the young among us, well known to the more weighted with years, women can take longer than men to reach orgasm.

Now, a leading sexual health doctor has claimed the average couple has sex two to three times a week. But, many men are not able to hold out long enough to satisfy their partners, Dr Harry Fisch claims.

The urologist, from New York Presbyterian Hospital, says about 45 per cent of men orgasm within two minutes of starting penetrative sex, which is much too quick for the average woman. He adds that most women need five to seven minutes to reach orgasm, Nerve.com reports.

Hmm, sounds like it might be necessary to offer some comfort to a very large number of unsatisfied women out there. Fortunately there is indeed a method of doing this: have sex more often.

As one of those sufficiently weighted with years to know about this, although not a sex doctor, it’s possible to note that the average man, having waited two or three days to get his end away, is positively gasping for it at that point. Which is what leads to the taking 2 minutes before he wants to have a nap. The answer to this is to have sex more often than that: for the more frequent the male orgasm over time then the longer it takes to reach orgasm each time. So, ladies, the solution is in your own, umm, hands. Put out more often and you’ll be getting rogered for longer, to we must assume, your greater satisfaction.

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Tormented And Alone: The Neurotic Dreams Of The Ladies Of Romance Comics http://www.anorak.co.uk/395356/keyposts/tormented-and-alone-the-neurotic-dreams-of-the-ladies-of-romance-comics.html/ http://www.anorak.co.uk/395356/keyposts/tormented-and-alone-the-neurotic-dreams-of-the-ladies-of-romance-comics.html/#comments Thu, 24 Apr 2014 09:47:38 +0000 http://www.anorak.co.uk/?p=395356  ex rom 28 09 resize Tormented And Alone: The Neurotic Dreams Of The Ladies Of Romance Comics

 

READING old romance comic books is like slipping into the subconscious mind of the mid-century female. It was a time when their entire well-being and happiness revolved around dumb men; when every single action and decision was predicated on pleasing oblivious males.  Thus, in comic after comic, with rarely an exception, you have the requisite scene of the beautiful female lying in bed pining desperately over some clueless oaf.

 

4 4 2012 8 26 16 PM Tormented And Alone: The Neurotic Dreams Of The Ladies Of Romance Comics

 

No doubt, it’s still pretty common for females to fantasize over men.  Women’s Lib made great strides towards creating a more level playing field, but it didn’t do away with human nature.  To a certain extent, the cliché is a timeless truth: girls will be girls, and boys will be boys.

That being said, the breadth and scope of bedtime fantasy scenes in romance comics is jaw-dropping insane!

 

7 22 2012 10 35 24 AM Tormented And Alone: The Neurotic Dreams Of The Ladies Of Romance Comics

 

All the way through the 1950s and onward into the 70s, romance comic women fantasized about their men.  Never a happily lustful dream – always a stress nightmare.  If she’s reliving a passionate kiss, the man has since ditched her for another woman.  If she’s reliving a hot-blooded embrace, the man has since disowned her and left her for dead.  You get the picture.

 

7 22 2012 1 31 56 PM Tormented And Alone: The Neurotic Dreams Of The Ladies Of Romance Comics

 

These poor ladies were conflicted messes.  The stories always end on a positive note, with Prince Charming having a change of heart, etc.  However, the pages leading up to the fairy-tale endings are filled with neurotic torment.

 

4 6 2012 6 50 13 PM Tormented And Alone: The Neurotic Dreams Of The Ladies Of Romance Comics

 

No wonder the “free love” movement took hold so easily.  The whole mating process for women was one of constant fear and self-loathing.

 

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Catching a man was a matter of life and death…. or worse. Life as a spinster  was a fate worse than death.   If these comic books were even close to realistically portraying the feminine mindset, the eagerness of Boomer women to embrace the Sexual Revolution is no longer a mystery.

 

ex rom 28 10 resize Tormented And Alone: The Neurotic Dreams Of The Ladies Of Romance Comics

 

It’s a toss-up between Popular Andy or Faithful Griff.   Whatever you do, don’t go with Skeeter – that way lies madness.

 

4 4 2012 8 21 38 PM Tormented And Alone: The Neurotic Dreams Of The Ladies Of Romance Comics

 

The anguish of losing this pathetic douche keeps this poor woman awake all night.  Did men realize the power and dominion they wielded?  Of course, this only applied to the breadwinners.  Women weren’t having night terrors over blue-collar fellas.  It was always the urban professionals stealing the young girls’ hearts.

 

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Miss Temple fades in and out of rapturous fantasies about the unattainable Tod.  It’s starting to disturb the children.

 

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She’s dreaming of “the kiss he never gave me… a kiss as warm as his eyes… a kiss that drove back the rain”.  Meanwhile, he’s just dreaming of screwing her brains out.

 

Campus Loves 2 10 Tormented And Alone: The Neurotic Dreams Of The Ladies Of Romance Comics

 

If there’s anything worse than a floating disembodied head, it’s a judgmental floating disembodied head.

 

Campus Loves 2 29 Tormented And Alone: The Neurotic Dreams Of The Ladies Of Romance Comics

 

You’ll also learn from reading romance comics that it’s ALWAYS her fault.

 

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“I was sick all, right! Sick with the frustration and a growing knowledge of my own wickedness”

Like I said: ALWAYS her fault.  Self-loathing and paralyzing guilt were just a couple of the inner demons plaguing the mid-century woman. 

 

TrueLovePictorial04 041 Tormented And Alone: The Neurotic Dreams Of The Ladies Of Romance Comics

 

One begins to wonder if these women ever got any sleep.  Bedtime in romance comics basically consists of self-abasement and soul-crushing anguish and regret – this doesn’t leave much room for some shut-eye.   Perhaps, half their problem is sleep deprivation!

 

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No wonder Valium was popped like vitamins back in the day.  Anything to get you through the gut-wrenching misery of being single.

 

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Truthfully, the women in these comics are knockouts.  So, why are they spending all their evenings in a spineless heap, writhing in psychic self-immolation?  This does not compute.

 

CGR038 11 Tormented And Alone: The Neurotic Dreams Of The Ladies Of Romance Comics

 

“My life was shattered! I no longer had anything to live for, and all I wanted to do was cry… even if it was for the rest of my life.”

Welcome to the joys of the dating world according to the pages of romance comics.

 

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Misery: thy name is romance comic woman.

 

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“It wasn’t just a casual kiss! He meant it… and he started to tell me something… but he stopped himself!”

That’s it, honey.  Just obsess about every nuance of the relationship. Let it consume you, until you have scared him away and you’re left a quivering shell of a woman.  It’s the right thing to do.

 

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All You Need Is Love… and a prescription for Benzodiazepines.

 

CGR063029 Tormented And Alone: The Neurotic Dreams Of The Ladies Of Romance Comics

 

I’m sure it’s all her fault, whatever the problem is.  But let’s not worry too much about these tormented ladies of romance comics.  Remember, it always works out in the end…

 

scan0032 Tormented And Alone: The Neurotic Dreams Of The Ladies Of Romance Comics

 

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Josie Cunningham Wants Stabbing, Punching And Shooting, Says The Righteous Twitter Mob http://www.anorak.co.uk/395395/news/josie-cunningham-wants-stabbing-punching-and-shooting-says-the-righteous-twitter-mob.html/ http://www.anorak.co.uk/395395/news/josie-cunningham-wants-stabbing-punching-and-shooting-says-the-righteous-twitter-mob.html/#comments Thu, 24 Apr 2014 09:02:01 +0000 http://www.anorak.co.uk/?p=395395 JOSIE Cunningham is the victim of a Twitter hunt. Righteous of Twitter is in favour of killing the mum-of-two who said she would abort her child to appear on Big Brother. These clear thinkers would leave Josie’s children motherless and possibly orphaned. The “bitch”, “c*nt” and  “slag” had it coming. We’ve compiled a selection of the more robust tweets. They all seem sincere and devoid of humour. And, remember, that what you say on Twitter can earn you prison sentence two  and a police raid.

But there is a caveat, if the Twitter police don’t like you (see Emma West should be raped and “Let’s hunt him down”) you really can say what you like. Free Speech, it turns out out, is only free on Twitter if the illiberal mob agree that their target is fair game and won’t snitch on you.

 

Let’s kick off with a call for the children to be taken away from their mother, whose been jailed for having an abortion:

 

josie cunningham 23 Josie Cunningham Wants Stabbing, Punching And Shooting, Says The Righteous Twitter Mob

 

And swiftly move on to the ones who crave violence:

Screen shot 2014 04 24 at 09.06.06 Josie Cunningham Wants Stabbing, Punching And Shooting, Says The Righteous Twitter Mob  Screen shot 2014 04 24 at 09.05.51 Josie Cunningham Wants Stabbing, Punching And Shooting, Says The Righteous Twitter Mob  Screen shot 2014 04 24 at 09.05.36 Josie Cunningham Wants Stabbing, Punching And Shooting, Says The Righteous Twitter Mob  josie cunningham 22 Josie Cunningham Wants Stabbing, Punching And Shooting, Says The Righteous Twitter Mob  josie cunningham 21 Josie Cunningham Wants Stabbing, Punching And Shooting, Says The Righteous Twitter Mob  josie cunningham 20 Josie Cunningham Wants Stabbing, Punching And Shooting, Says The Righteous Twitter Mob  josie cunningham 19 Josie Cunningham Wants Stabbing, Punching And Shooting, Says The Righteous Twitter Mob  josie cunningham 18 Josie Cunningham Wants Stabbing, Punching And Shooting, Says The Righteous Twitter Mob  josie cunningham 17 Josie Cunningham Wants Stabbing, Punching And Shooting, Says The Righteous Twitter Mob  josie cunningham 16 Josie Cunningham Wants Stabbing, Punching And Shooting, Says The Righteous Twitter Mob  josie cunningham 15 Josie Cunningham Wants Stabbing, Punching And Shooting, Says The Righteous Twitter Mob  josie cunningham 14 Josie Cunningham Wants Stabbing, Punching And Shooting, Says The Righteous Twitter Mob  josie cunningham 13 Josie Cunningham Wants Stabbing, Punching And Shooting, Says The Righteous Twitter Mob  josie cunningham 12 Josie Cunningham Wants Stabbing, Punching And Shooting, Says The Righteous Twitter Mob  josie cunningham 11 Josie Cunningham Wants Stabbing, Punching And Shooting, Says The Righteous Twitter Mob  josie cunningham 10 Josie Cunningham Wants Stabbing, Punching And Shooting, Says The Righteous Twitter Mob  josie cunningham 9 Josie Cunningham Wants Stabbing, Punching And Shooting, Says The Righteous Twitter Mob  josie cunningham 8 Josie Cunningham Wants Stabbing, Punching And Shooting, Says The Righteous Twitter Mob  josie cunningham 7 Josie Cunningham Wants Stabbing, Punching And Shooting, Says The Righteous Twitter Mob  josie cunningham 6 Josie Cunningham Wants Stabbing, Punching And Shooting, Says The Righteous Twitter Mob  josie cunningham 5 Josie Cunningham Wants Stabbing, Punching And Shooting, Says The Righteous Twitter Mob  josie cunningham 4 Josie Cunningham Wants Stabbing, Punching And Shooting, Says The Righteous Twitter Mob  josie cunningham 3 Josie Cunningham Wants Stabbing, Punching And Shooting, Says The Righteous Twitter Mob  josie cunningham 2 Josie Cunningham Wants Stabbing, Punching And Shooting, Says The Righteous Twitter Mob  josie cunningham 1 Josie Cunningham Wants Stabbing, Punching And Shooting, Says The Righteous Twitter Mob  josie cunningham1 Josie Cunningham Wants Stabbing, Punching And Shooting, Says The Righteous Twitter Mob

Such are the facts.

]]> http://www.anorak.co.uk/395395/news/josie-cunningham-wants-stabbing-punching-and-shooting-says-the-righteous-twitter-mob.html/feed/ 0 Josie Cunningham Is A Volunteer Witch Ready Made For Burning http://www.anorak.co.uk/395384/celebrities/josie-cunningham-is-a-volunteer-witch-ready-made-for-burning.html/ http://www.anorak.co.uk/395384/celebrities/josie-cunningham-is-a-volunteer-witch-ready-made-for-burning.html/#comments Thu, 24 Apr 2014 08:31:24 +0000 http://www.anorak.co.uk/?p=395384 JOSIE Cunningham is the topless stunna mum-of-two who had her breasts enlarged on the NHS and told us that if asked to appear on Big Brother she would abort the child in her womb.

 

boobs Josie Cunningham Is A Volunteer Witch Ready Made For Burning

 

Josie’s ability to say something shocking has scored her a Sun front page, a slot on ITV’s Daybreak and the chance to be commented on by columnists, like the Sun’s Jane Moore. The Sun’s cheque book sets them up, and the columnists hammers them in. Jane says the woman she’s not met is “greedy, callous and dangerously deluded”.

She had a happy childhood in a semi in Leeds, brought up by her hard-working and loving parents — Lisa, a retail manager, and Graham, a machine operator. She gained an impressive eight GCSEs, then studied accountancy at college with a view to serving in the Royal Navy.

Josie’s a bright woman who understands how to achieve fame and fortune by giving full throat to a strident to-deadline view in the media. No. Not Jane Moore; Josie Cunningham. Try to keep up.

“Mum and dad brought me up to believe I can achieve anything,” she says. So how galling that she has chosen to set her standards so soul-sappingly low.

Again, this is Josie, we’re talking about, not a woman who makes a living commenting on her.

First there was the breast enhancement, paid for by the same NHS that frequently denies cancer patients life-prolonging drugs for financial reasons.

Josie went from an AA to a DD cup. She was depressed enough for the NHS to consider her worth helping. Is Moore saying that mental health issues are unimportant? Josie is the woman who told Sun readers:

“My GP referred me for the operation because I wasn’t just flat-chested — I didn’t have any boobs whatsoever. I could never go on holiday as I lived in terror of ever being seen in a bikini and could never set foot outside without a padded bra. The doctors said they’d never seen anything like it and believed me when I burst into tears and told them it was ruining my life.”

To which anyone with sensitive bone in there undies says “Good on yer”. How the NHS invests its money is no Josie Cunningham’s puzzle to solve.

Curiously, she claims the father is either a “high-flying heart surgeon” or “professional footballer” of her, ahem, acquaintance.

If it’s the latter, one wonders why she considered getting rid of what other Josie types might consider to be a golden goose. After all, just think of the celebrity magazine deals for the baby pictures, christening, first birthday etc, not to mention the generous maintenance in keeping with a pro-footballer’s salary. So far, so tawdry.

Or as the Sun put it before:

 

hooker Josie Cunningham Is A Volunteer Witch Ready Made For Burning

 

Tawdry sells the Sun:

Moore concludes:

Josie, 23, is already a lost cause. But what of her poor young children?

The poor kids whose mum you just insulted?

If they don’t grow up to be damaged by their silly mother’s shallowness and callous disregard for their emotional wellbeing, it will be nothing short of a miracle.

Good luck, kids. Although your mum did say (and look it up on the web):

“I want it for myself but I want it for my boys… I love them and I want to be able to buy them the most expensive toys and to give them nice holidays. People will criticise me but I’m a good mother.”

And whatever you think of her, do no not pity her:

 

Screen shot 2014 04 24 at 08.36.13 Josie Cunningham Is A Volunteer Witch Ready Made For Burning

 

Actually, do pity her. As Jan Moir writes in the Mail:

 

Screen shot 2014 04 24 at 08.37.17 Josie Cunningham Is A Volunteer Witch Ready Made For Burning

 

 

Pity or no pity? It’s tough choice…. But Jan is here to help clear the fog:

Just when we had put the tragic life and death of Jade Goody behind us, just when the spectre of Katie Price seemed to be diminishing into an acrid mist of irrelevance, just when the moment came to peep out from behind the reality show safety curtain and ask if the long, long matinee of mediocrity was over, wham! Along comes Josie Cunningham.

Katie Price was relevant? We’ve only just gotten over the death of Jade Goody? Go on…

And for every woman who has agonised over an abortion, for those who have lost a baby or know the quiet agony of longing for a pregnancy that never comes, her casual callousness must strike at the heart like a thunderclap.

How Jan must be kicking herself for not having invented Josie Cunninhgam, as Josie Cunningham seems to have invented herself. Josie is the woman who volunteers to be attacked in print. Josie Cunningham’s chosen career is to be a profession hate figure. Whereas Moir is a jobbing Daily Mail hate troll, attracting comment-graded pay for “daring to speak her mind”, Josie is the full working version, an ambulatory Daily Mail headline. Thanks to her hair extensions, nylon nipple tape and cartoon bomb-shaped breasts, Josie is pretty easy to burn as a witch.

(And, by the way, this is the Jan Moir who knows about callousness, having opined in a homophobic rant on gay singer Stephen Gately’s death from fluid on the lungs: Why there was nothing ‘natural’ about Stephen Gately’s death.”)

Jan adds:

 

She had managed to persuade some sap doctors that she had been bullied at school for being flat-chested. After posing topless to show off her new 36DD breasts, she announced her new chest was ruining her life and that she was going to sue the NHS for clinical negligence and emotional distress. In the meantime, being unable to make enough money as a model, she turned to prostitution.

Which should be legalised to better protect women like Josie Cunningham. But go on, Jan:

I see her, ultimately, as someone who is silly and deluded, not someone who is a villainess.

No, no. Not Jane. Josie:

Despite the fact that she is not the sort of woman you would trust with a three-piece jigsaw, somewhere, somehow she has been encouraged to think that she could be rich and famous.
Like millions of others, she has to be protected from this notion, but, most of all, she has to be protected from herself.

Josie has eight GCSEs, although not one in jigsaws. What would Jan not trust Josie to do with a three-piece jigsaw? The budding celeb knows her job, whatever Josie did with the puzzle, it would be dirty, morally debatable and guaranteed to give tabloid hacks something to comment on. Rest easy, Jan. Josie is on your side.

Jan the great moraliser will protect you Josie, just as soon as she’s earned a living from calling you names.

Over in the Mirror, ex-Big Brother housemate Carole Malone says Josie is “the poster girl for all that’s dirty, immoral and sick in our society”. At which point Josie surely punches the air and declares ‘CRACKED IT!”

Who needs Simon Cowell?

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Stephen Sutton: Dying Teen’s ‘Final Thumbs Up’ Nets A Fortune http://www.anorak.co.uk/395344/news/stephen-sutton-dying-teens-final-thumbs-up-nets-a-fortune.html/ http://www.anorak.co.uk/395344/news/stephen-sutton-dying-teens-final-thumbs-up-nets-a-fortune.html/#comments Thu, 24 Apr 2014 00:46:09 +0000 http://www.anorak.co.uk/?p=395344 Stephen Sutton Stephen Sutton: Dying Teens Final Thumbs Up Nets A Fortune
STEPHEN Sutton, 19, has terminal cancer.

He aimed to raise £10,000 for charity. It was one of his 46 bucket list of things to do.

Then he posted a “final thumbs up”. He said he was “nearing the end”. People noticed. And the donations began to skyrocket.


999310 624023067609416 977476060 n Stephen Sutton: Dying Teens Final Thumbs Up Nets A Fortune

 

He wrote:

“I will continue fighting for as long as I can, and whatever happens next I want you all to know I am currently in a good place mentally and at ease with the situation. That’s it from me. But life has been good. Very good. Thank you to my mum and the rest of my family for everything. Thank you to my friends for being amazing. Thank you to my medical team for the hard work and effort they’ve continually they’ve put towards me. And thank you everyone else for sharing this wonderful journey with me.”

And when he saw that he’d raised over £1million:

“But seriously… Wow. Just wow. Thank you all so much :)”

To make a donation visit Justgiving.com/Stephen-sutton-TCT.

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1978: Beauty Tips For the Disco Dancer http://www.anorak.co.uk/395333/the-consumer/fashion/1978-beauty-tips-for-the-disco-dancer.html/ http://www.anorak.co.uk/395333/the-consumer/fashion/1978-beauty-tips-for-the-disco-dancer.html/#comments Wed, 23 Apr 2014 21:07:31 +0000 http://www.anorak.co.uk/?p=395333 IT’S 1978. All the cool kids are disco dancing. But how to get the look just so? Look no further:

 

1978 1978: Beauty Tips For the Disco Dancer

 

Let’s zoom in.

 

1978 1 1978: Beauty Tips For the Disco Dancer

 

1978 2 1978: Beauty Tips For the Disco Dancer

 

1978 3 1978: Beauty Tips For the Disco Dancer

 

1978 4 1978: Beauty Tips For the Disco Dancer

 

Spotter: Ladivas-Discodiva

 

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Justin Bieber: Tribute To Japanese War Criminals Embarrasses Japanese War Criminals http://www.anorak.co.uk/395327/news/justin-bieber-tribute-to-japanese-war-criminals-embarrasses-japanese-war-criminals.html/ http://www.anorak.co.uk/395327/news/justin-bieber-tribute-to-japanese-war-criminals-embarrasses-japanese-war-criminals.html/#comments Wed, 23 Apr 2014 20:51:38 +0000 http://www.anorak.co.uk/?p=395327 PA 10016827 Justin Bieber: Tribute To Japanese War Criminals Embarrasses Japanese War Criminals

Japanese soldiers of the seventh division, marching from worship at the famous Yasukuni shrine in Tokyo, Japan, March 23, 1935.

 

JUSTIN Bieber has visited a shrine to Japanese war criminals, causing painful embarrassment to Japanese war criminals.

The Canadian pop star has been to the Yasukuni Shrine in Tokyo which marks the lives of Japan’s 2.5 million war dead, including convicted war criminals who committed atrocities when the Japanese occupied large parts of China and South Korea. People like General Hideki Tojo, who was executed for war crimes in 1948.

Bieber did not write on the shrine’s wall:  ’Truly inspiring to be able to come here. Tojo was a great guy. Hopefully he would have been a belieber.’

Still, at least he said sorry. Which is more than the Japanese have ever done.

 

justin bieber 1 Justin Bieber: Tribute To Japanese War Criminals Embarrasses Japanese War Criminals

 

PS: Justin Bieber is North Korea’s Minister of Culture.

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The Rise and Fall of Les McKeown and the Bay City Rollers http://www.anorak.co.uk/395246/keyposts/the-rise-and-fall-of-les-mckeown-and-the-bay-city-rollers.html/ http://www.anorak.co.uk/395246/keyposts/the-rise-and-fall-of-les-mckeown-and-the-bay-city-rollers.html/#comments Wed, 23 Apr 2014 19:52:28 +0000 http://www.anorak.co.uk/?p=395246 PA 1072536 Bay City Rollers 1975 The Rise and Fall of Les McKeown and the Bay City Rollers

The Bay City Rollers, 1974. The Press Association Archives.

 

THE BBC say it’s 60 million while The Guardian wrote that it was 120 million, The Scotsman, no doubt proud of the band’s Scottish roots, guessed 300 million.Whatever the amount was the Bay City Rollers certainly sold a lot of records although they still grumble to this day about how little they saw of the profits. Forty years ago the band was  just about to become massive. The lead singer, Les McKeown, who was just eighteen when he joined the band late in 1973, had his name inked onto a million school bags and notebooks. He was the Harry Styles of the day, maybe even more popular – there was less music to go round in those days.

In Edinburgh in 1966, a bassist Alan Longmuir, his younger brother, drummer Derek Longmuir, and their schoolfriend, lead singer Gordon “Nobby” Clark formed The Saxons. Two years later they changed their name to The Bay City Rollers by throwing a dart at a map of the United States and it landed near Bay City in Michigan. In 1971, with the help of producer Jonathan King who had chosen a song for them called Keep On Dancing but also provided all the backing vocals, the band had a hit which sold enough to reach no. 9 in the charts and enabled them to appear on Top of the Pops.

Then there was nothing, and in 1973 so completely disillusioned with the band’s future Clark left the band. Unfortunately it was with spectacular bad timing because the Rollers’ new single Remember (Sha La La La) immediately charted. Les McKeown who had only just replaced Clark quickly re-recorded the vocals and the song went on to reach No 6 in the UK charts.

 

 

Remember (Sha La La) – Bay City Rollers

To the surprise of most people, and almost certainly the band, the popularity of the Bay City Rollers exploded and a string of UK hits followed. They included Shang-a-Lang (no.2), Summerlove Sensation (no.3), and All of Me Loves All of You (no.4). By 1975 they were the highest-selling act in the UK and a 20 week television series was commissioned. It was called Shang-a-Lang and to hundreds of thousands of girls Tuesdays became known as Roller Days when they’d rush home to see their heroes on the TV. A cover of the Four Seasons’ Bye Bye Baby stayed at no. 1 for six weeks in the spring of 1975 and would become the biggest selling record of the year.

By now the distinctive clothing worn by the fans of the band was seen all over the country and not just in Scotland. The uniform usually featured calf-length trousers with tartan trimmings and small tartan scarves tied around the wrists. In 1975 Michael Parkin of The Guardian unkindly wrote of “A monstrous regiment of girls” and described that some of them had: “faint scars on their forearms where they have drawn blood while scratching “Eric” or “Les” with a pin – the stigmata of pop. “Mine turned Septic” said one girl, “and me mum was right mad”.”

 

PA 1238853 Rollermania New Victoria Theatre 1976 The Rise and Fall of Les McKeown and the Bay City Rollers

Young fans cool off outside the New Victoria Theatre in London, where teenagers went wild during a concert by the Bay City Rollers. At least 210 hysterical fans were treated for minor cuts and bruises, after flattening the first three rows of seats. PA/PA Archive/Press Association Images

PA 1238854 Rollermania 1976 New Victoria Theatre The Rise and Fall of Les McKeown and the Bay City Rollers

A policeman carries a young female fan outside the New Victoria Theatre in London. PA/PA Archive/Press Association Images

Fans of the Bay City Rollers 1975 Hammersmith Odeon The Rise and Fall of Les McKeown and the Bay City Rollers

High spirits from two fans of the Bay City Rollers, as they wait with other fans for the doors to open at the Odeon, Hammersmith, for the first of two concerts by the group. PA/PA Archive/Press Association Images.

 

The obsessive nature of the obsessive fans became known as ‘Rollermania’ and it even had its own song. Over and over and over again the fans would chant (to the tune of This Old Man):

B-A-Y, B-A-Y,
B-A-Y, C-I-T-Y,
With an R-O-double-L, E-R-S,
Bay City Rollers are the best!
Eric, Derek, Woody too,
Alan, Leslie, we love you,
With an R-O-double-L, E-R-S,
Bay City Rollers are the best!

In May 1975 19 year old Les McKeown was probably feeling rather cocky when he was driving his turbo charged Ford Mustang around Edinburgh. Life was pretty good. But an elderly woman called Euphemia Clunie hadn’t read the right script, walked across a four-lane road in the dark and McKeown slammed right into her. She was killed instantly. He said: “She only lived across the road from me, and I wanted to knock on her family’s door and say, ‘I’m really, really sorry’, but I wasn’t allowed to do that. I wasn’t allowed to go to her funeral.” Despite some witnesses originally claiming he was driving at 70 mph (he was initially charged with causing death by dangerous driving) McKeown was found guilty of driving recklessly, fined just £150 and banned for a year.

McKeown was never really the same again. He told The Guardian’s Simon Hattenstone in 2005 that he had been told to try to put the death to the back of his mind and forget about killing his neighbour; “They didn’t see it from a helpful, human way. It wasn’t like, ‘We’re going to get through this together’, it was more like, ‘We need you on stage tomorrow, you wee cu*t, so you better stop fu*king crying.’ A struggling McKeown broke down at a gig in Oxford later that year; “I was singing some song and I just lost the plot,” he recalled “I burst into tears, couldn’t handle it anymore. There were all these fans and when I started crying they came forward wanting to mother me. And then my attention suddenly focused on the orchestra pit. There were girls coming over and getting hurt and all these photographers were taking pictures of them, and for some reason in my twisted little mind I thought that was out of order so I jumped into the orchestra pit and started beating up a photographer. Promptly got arrested and got a two-year suspended jail sentence for that as well.”

 

Bay City Rollers on the Ann-Margret Show recorded in 1975.

 

Meanwhile the Rollers continued having hits for another few months, but certainly by 1977, as is almost always the way with the cyclic nature of pop music, the Rollers were suddenly yesterday’s men. Except in the odd suburban teenage room Rollermania was no more. The following year they left for Los Angeles to try to reinvent themselves. McKeown, however, was more interested in taking cocaine with his teenage heroes such as John Bonham and Keith Moon than playing with the Rollers. Just a few years earlier, McKeown had been in the front row when Led Zeppelin played the King’s Theatre in Edinburgh, and now he was taking drugs with his heroes.

There were also women, apparently. McKeown was seen at a few Hollywood film premieres with Jodie Foster, but he later said; “I never really got into her drawers or anything.” A relationship with Britt Ekland followed that wasn’t so innocent but it ended suddenly when McKeown slept with Ekland’s daughter. “She was hot to trot,” he would later say, “I don’t know if she did that with all her mum’s boyfriends, but she was certainly wanting a good shag.”

 

The ill-fated American series The Bay City Rollers show recorded in 1978.

 

In 1978 McKeown told fellow Rollers that he wasn’t happy with their new direction (most of the members wanted to write more of the songs and not rely on session musicians to play on their records) and they should all leave the band. They wrote back saying, “Fu*k you, you’re fired.” By the age of 22, he was an insignificant has-been. “It was horrible. I was fu*ked, basically.” Not exactly impressed with the talent in the rest of the band, McKeown would later say, “Eric Faulkner really did think he was John Lennon born again, and you know, he has never written anything you can spit on”.

 

bay city rollers cards 2 The Rise and Fall of Les McKeown and the Bay City Rollers

 

The Bay City Rollers’ first manager was Tam Paton, the son of an Edinburgh potato merchant and a former leader in a show band who played at Edinburgh’s Palais de Danse. He also put on teenage nights every Thursday and soon realised that the Bay City Rollers were going down better than anybody else. Paton was convinced that this was nothing else other than that they wore very, very tight trousers. Paton when on to sell the Rollers to the world as utterly innocent and clean-living young men. Girlfriends, at least openly, were banned, they fronted an anti-smoking campaign while saying they couldn’t stand girls who smoked The teen magazines were told and dutifully wrote that the band only ever drank milk and that Stuart “Woody” Wood was so afraid of the dark that he always slept with a teddy bear.

Tam Paton, who was openly gay (as much as you could be in those days) even subjected himself to the squeaky-clean image machine and was photographed with his fiancé along with the rest of the band to publicise his engagement. He later explained to Hannes A. Jonsson in a year 2000 interview, “I got engaged to a female and the reason for that was simply that I had the News Of The World floating around at the time, in the 70’s, that I was having it off with little…that I was rolling from one room to another and all that kind of crap. If they thought that they had that homosexual manager, you know, they could all be rolling about in bed with me. So, I got wangled into this stupid engagement thing.”

 

PA 1675917 Bay City Rollers with manager The Rise and Fall of Les McKeown and the Bay City Rollers

The Bay City Rollers, currently on a concert tour of Britain, celebrate with champagne at a Manchester hotel after the announcement that their 36-year-old manager, Tam Paton (centre) has become engaged to Czech-born 28-year-old London art student Marcella Knaiflova. PA/PA Archive/Press Association Images

 

In 1979 Paton was fired from what was left of the band and three years later was convicted of gross indecency with teenage boys, for which he served one year of a three-year prison sentence. He told Jonsson; “Well, I am gay but I’m not into small boys and in all the articles…you know, I did go to jail for gross indecency. The youngest boy was fifteen. People have said he was thirteen or fourteen, and shit like that, but that’s just crap. There was nobody in my case at fourteen or thirteen; there was one guy at fifteen, who actually just watched a movie with me, called Tina With The Big Tits and we had a couple of lagers. I didn’t lay a hand on him, nothing like that, and we watched a picture with women’s boobs in it – hardly anything homosexual about that. And I can prove that. And the rest of them were sixteen, seventeen and eighteen-year-olds. One of those chaps was actually the youngest soldier to serve in the Falkland Islands conflict, one of the marines. So it was alright for him to go and shoot some Argentinians at seventeen or eighteen, but it was not alright to roll about with somebody who was thirty-nine or thirty-eight at the time. But, unfortunately, on my record, I have ‘Gross Indecency’; I’ve been a naughty boy.”

 

PA 1676747 Tam Paton 2003 The Rise and Fall of Les McKeown and the Bay City Rollers

2003: Tam Paton leaves Edinburgh Crown Court. The former Bay City Rollers manager appeared in court charged with drugs offences. Paton, 64, made a brief appearance in private before Sheriff Noel O’Brien. Picture by: David Cheskin/PA Archive/Press Association Images

PA 1282916 Derek Longmuir Edinburgh Sheriff Court 2000 The Rise and Fall of Les McKeown and the Bay City Rollers

Derek Longmuir, aged 49, one of the founder members of the 1970′s Bay City Rollers pop group, leaving Edinburgh Sheriff Court, after escaping a jail sentence for possessing child pornography. Longmuir was sentenced to 300 hours community service. * 08/10/01 Bay City Roller Derek Longmuir, who retained his right to work as a nurse after a disciplinary hearing decided not to strike him off the nursing register. The regulatory authority for the profession found Longmuir guilty of misconduct but decided he should receive only a caution. Longmuir said he was “very happy” with the outcome. David Cheskin/PA Archive/Press Association Images

 

In later years Paton became very ill, suffering two heart attacks and a stroke. He was arrested on more child sexual abuse charges in January 2003, but was later cleared of all allegations. The following year in April 2004, Paton was convicted of supplying cannabis and fined £200,000. In 2007, he was accused but cleared, due to lack of evidence, of raping one of the band’s guitarist, Pat McGlynn, in a hotel room in 1977. Paton died of a suspected heart attack aged 70 at his Edinburgh home which he shared with several young men, on 8 April 2009.

In 2008, Les McKeown, admitted he was an alcoholic and was addicted to cocaine. His doctor told him that he had just months to live. In 2009 he agreed to appear in a Living Channel reality show called Rehab which filmed him at the expensive Passages clinic in Malibu. During the show McKeown revealed an early sexual encounter with Paton under the influence of drugs which had left him with feelings of guilt, anger, fear and self-loathing. McKeown initially said that he had slept with men ‘now and again’ saying, “I’ve been a bit of a George Michael, meeting people, often strangers, for sex. Not in public toilets – I’m not big on the unhygienic side of things. These days you’d meet online and figure out a place where to meet – your place or mine.”

 

Les McKeown judging Scotch Pie Championship Nov 2013 The Rise and Fall of Les McKeown and the Bay City Rollers

2013: Les McKeown, the one-time front man for Bay City Rollers judges the 15th World Scotch Pie Championship at Carnegie Conference Centre in Dunfermline.
Picture by: Andrew Milligan/PA Wire/Press Association Images

 

In between judging Scotch Pie contests Les McKeown is still performing, albeit with no other original Rollers in the line-up, he admits, “my tartan trousers are a little bigger these days”. This summer you can see Les McKeown’s Legendary Bay City Rollers in the Once In A Lifetime – The Final Tour that also features the Osmonds, David Essex and Showaddywaddy.

The Bay City Rollers Trading Cards

The Bay City Roller And Ann Margaret’s Saturday Night Special: The Greatest Audience Video

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Mobile Canteens Of World War 2 (1939-1945) http://www.anorak.co.uk/395245/news/flashback/mobile-canteens-of-world-war-2-1939-1945.html/ http://www.anorak.co.uk/395245/news/flashback/mobile-canteens-of-world-war-2-1939-1945.html/#comments Wed, 23 Apr 2014 16:39:33 +0000 http://www.anorak.co.uk/?p=395245 THEY say an Amy marches on its stomach. But food isn’t all about going on the offensive. In World War 2, going to the canteen for some food was often a moment to relax. We’ve raided the archives for these photos of canteens in WW2.

The captions are of their time.

The faces each tell a story.

PA 9307340 2 Mobile Canteens Of World War 2 (1939 1945)

Miss Claire Luce, right, well known British Actress, served champagne to the British Tommies who flocked into the canteen she opened under the name of St. Peter’s kitchen at St. Pancras station in London on Nov. 7, 1939. It is from this and other stations in London that the Tommies leave enroute to the fighting front in France.

 

PA 9463726 Mobile Canteens Of World War 2 (1939 1945)

Mrs. Montagu Norman, the wife of the governor of the Bank of England, handing out tea to the A.R.P. workers after she had opened the canteen at Islington Town Hall, Jan. 15, 1940.

PA 1260392 Mobile Canteens Of World War 2 (1939 1945)

The Catholic Women’s League maintain a canteen and recreation for members of H.M. Forces in St. Peter’s Hall in Westminster Cathedral Yard in London for troops to enjoy a spell of comfort.
Picture date: 1st December, 1939.

PA 10875022 Mobile Canteens Of World War 2 (1939 1945)

A woman works in a mobile Kitchen, Feb. 15, 1941.

PA 10875024 Mobile Canteens Of World War 2 (1939 1945)

A woman works in a mobile Kitchen, Feb. 15, 1941.

PA 10875018 Mobile Canteens Of World War 2 (1939 1945)

PA 9849345 Mobile Canteens Of World War 2 (1939 1945)

Americans who have answered Lord Woolton’s appeal to London caterers for hot food and drink for air raid victims by giving fifty mobile canteens through the allied relief fund, have now decided to increase this fleet of mobile kitchens to 100 vehicles. The first of these mobile canteens started work in London on October 9. The new canteen giving warm food and drink to raid victims in one of London’s bombed areas, Oct. 9, 1940.

PA 9206827 Mobile Canteens Of World War 2 (1939 1945)

Christopher Ounsted, driver of the mobile canteen, takes the order for a day’s meal from a woman who is partly blind in London on Sept. 17, 1941. The canteen is one of many received from America and operating in poor sections of the country, helping to feed people who are senior citizens, handicapped or otherwise incapacitated.

PA 9849345 1 Mobile Canteens Of World War 2 (1939 1945)

PA 9206829 Mobile Canteens Of World War 2 (1939 1945)

Voluntary workers in the communal kitchen preparing meals, some of which will be eaten by employees in nearby factories in London on Sept. 17, 1941. Others are taken in a mobile canteen to crippled, aged and homeless folk. The canteen normally operates during enemy raids. It is sent around on mercy errands to feed the poor and infirm during the lull in the blitz.

PA 9206837 Mobile Canteens Of World War 2 (1939 1945)

Christopher Ounsted, driver of the mobile canteen, delivering a hot dinner to a woman during his rounds in London on Sept. 17, 1941. The canteen, a gift from the U.S., would be idle normally, as a result of the lull in the blitz, but it is put to use to feed the poor, aged and homeless.

PA 9213341 Mobile Canteens Of World War 2 (1939 1945)

Christopher Ounsted, volunteer driver of the mobile canteen, stops at a communal kitchen to copy the day’s menu prior to starting out on his day’s rounds in London on Sept. 17, 1941. He presents a list of the food available to the people he visits, permitting them to make a selection.

PA 9032216 Mobile Canteens Of World War 2 (1939 1945)

European and Chinese canteen girls serving in a mobile canteen given by a civilian to the Singapore Passive Defense Services in, Jan. 31, 1942.

PA 8953249 Mobile Canteens Of World War 2 (1939 1945)

This mobile canteen carries food and refreshments throughout Singapore now under fierce Japanese attack shown Feb. 11, 1942. It is operated by European and Chinese girls as part of the passive defense services there.

PA 9279474 Mobile Canteens Of World War 2 (1939 1945)

A convoy of new lorries was driven entirely by A.T.S. personnel from a Bedfordshire factory to a Gloucestershire R.A.S.C. depot. Their 100 mile journey was broken by a ‘“pause for refreshmentÂ’ at the mobile canteen sent from H.Q. to meet the convoy, March 25, 1942. A halt on the way during the passage of the convoy-and the A.T.S. girls enjoy an Al Fresco lunch at the roadside in a picturesque setting while their lorries are lined up behind.

PA 9418787 Mobile Canteens Of World War 2 (1939 1945)

An all-Norwegian Fighter Squadron equipped with Spitfires is now flying with the Royal Air Force. It has been in action since March this year and is doing fine work. Many members of the Squadron can tell thrilling stories of their escapes from their native country to take up arms again in Britain. The Norwegian Air Force, which is commanded by Rear Admiral Hjalmar Riiser-Larsen, the famous explorer, is trained in Canada, and then comes to this country for final training and to take up operational duties. Men of the Norwegian ground staff line up for refreshments at the mobile N.A.A.F.I. canteen in the Spitfire dispersal area, May 18, 1942.

PA 9795219 Mobile Canteens Of World War 2 (1939 1945)

An American Red Cross mobile canteen on the quay of a Northern Ireland port furnishes hot coffee for some of the American soldiers who landed there with the largest A.E.F. of the current war, May 27, 1942. The uniformed Red Cross worker is Miss Louisa Farrand of New York City.

PA 9261376 Mobile Canteens Of World War 2 (1939 1945)

Crowds inspect the 14 mobile disaster units dedicated to the Red Cross in New York, June 27, 1942, by the Masons of New York state. This equipment is especially designed for use following an air raid. The mobile canteens are capable of serving 150 meals an hour. The Red Cross expects to have similar units for all the larger cities in the country. The vehicles were accepted for the Red Cross by Norman H. Davis, national chairman.

PA 11033797 Mobile Canteens Of World War 2 (1939 1945)

Red Cross workers, demonstrating one of the five mobile canteen units acquired for relief work in the event Washington has an air raid, stop by the Capitol on June 18, 1942, and dish up mugs of coffee for Senator Joseph C. O’Mahoney, left, (D-Wyo.) and Rep. Edith Nourse Rogers, right, (R-Mass.). (AP Photo/Robert Clover)

PA 9206814 Mobile Canteens Of World War 2 (1939 1945)

A mobile canteen is presented in London by the Buffalo, N.Y., branch of the Aid to Britain organization on Jan. 4, 1943. With Women’s Volunteer Service Workers present, Lady Iris Capell (right, in uniform) Vice Chairman of the W. V. S., accepted the canteen from Mrs. Logan Wright, Chairman of the Aid to Britain organization.

PA 9206172 Mobile Canteens Of World War 2 (1939 1945)

A busy scene in the Legion’s dockside hut headquarters in London, Feb. 27, 1943 as mobile canteen drivers and helpers load up trays of rolls for the midmorning lunch they serve to dock laborers.

PA 11014588 Mobile Canteens Of World War 2 (1939 1945) PA 9671870 Mobile Canteens Of World War 2 (1939 1945)

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Red Cross worker Marie Salcheider, of St. Paul, Minn., fills vats with freshly made coffee, at a base in Dutch New Guinea on Oct. 23, 1944. The coffee will be transported in mobile canteens to isolated areas.

PA 10287116 Mobile Canteens Of World War 2 (1939 1945)

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London landmarks & Buildings – Clapham Deep Shelter:
Home Office Tunnel Shelters at Clapham – A canteen in one of the shelters.

PA 8335906 Mobile Canteens Of World War 2 (1939 1945)

Deep in tubes underneath underground railway lines in London shelters provide safety from buzz bombs, July 25, 1944. They crowd around the canteen cash desk to get receipts for money spent in the canteen on refreshments

PA 8335910 Mobile Canteens Of World War 2 (1939 1945)

Young Londoners, in a shelter against Hitler?s robot bombs, crowd the canteen for refreshments, deep under the city of London, July 25, 1944. When completed, the shelters will provide sleeping accommodations for 40,000 persons.

PA 9333829 Mobile Canteens Of World War 2 (1939 1945)

Housed in 20 underground tunnels “somewhere on the West Coast of England’s” several hundred women are turning out war materials in complete safety from air raids. The tunnels were discovered by the owners of the firm, Wilkie Engineers, Ltd., when the foundations of A.B.C., seaside resort were being laid. Long afterward, when the company charted marking materials for the war, the tunnels were converted into a complete factory. In addition to the working rooms, the underground factory includes a canteen, sun ray room, rest room, games room and a night club with bar. A section of the factory in England April 11, 1944. Community singing goes on while the women work.

PA 9333805 Mobile Canteens Of World War 2 (1939 1945)

Time out for a cup of tea during a five-minute morning break in the underground factory in England April 11, 1944.

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Lunchtime in the underground factory’s canteen in England April 11, 1944. Most of the workers are women. The benches are pews from a nearby bombed out church.

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A lady operates a semi-mobile canteen on the streets of Coventry following Lord Woolton’s statement that the Ministry of Food had completed arrangements for feeding 20 percent of the population of Great Britain and Northern Ireland in the event of an emergency. Plans had been made for providing over 20,000,000 hot meals a day or 5,000,000 full course meals.
Date: 01/10/1943

PA 10287103 1 Mobile Canteens Of World War 2 (1939 1945)

PA 10287116 1 Mobile Canteens Of World War 2 (1939 1945)

Red Cross worker Roxane Pollack (right), of Philadelphia, Pa., hands coffee and doughnuts to Pfc. Marvin Clover, of Clayton, Ala., as he stands guard at his gun position on the fringe of a Dutch New Guinea air base on Oct. 23, 1944. Mobile canteen of the Red Cross is mode of transportation of the food.

PA 8879125 Mobile Canteens Of World War 2 (1939 1945)

Violet Attlee, wife of the Deputy Prime Minister, prepares to go out in her Y.M.C.A. canteen, in London, on Feb. 9, 1944.

PA 10155221 Mobile Canteens Of World War 2 (1939 1945)

Following attendance at pontifical mass in St. Patrick’s Cathedral in New York on Feb. 28, 1943, one hundred sailors from the French battleship Richelieu were guests at the Cathedral Canteen, 17 East 51st Street. On their way across the street for their quotas of coffee, tea or milk and pastry, the French seamen were cheered by this elderly woman, shown waving a tri-color flag and crying ‘Vive La France.’

PA 9213286 Mobile Canteens Of World War 2 (1939 1945)

A canteen presented by the people of Canada to the London home guard is set up alongside a bomb-shattered building in London on Dec. 28, 1942. The canteen was presented at a ceremony on December 13 at which the High Commissioner for Canada, Vincent Massey, presided. (

PA 9463053 Mobile Canteens Of World War 2 (1939 1945)

This is the canteen in one of London’s new deep underground air raid shelters, Oct. 20, 1942. Note the line of bunks which are convertible into seats on the left wall.

PA 9966390 Mobile Canteens Of World War 2 (1939 1945)

London’s new tunnel shelters, built below tube stations, are now practically completed. There are to be eight of them, and it is hoped that seven will be ready by the autumn. They will provide security for 8,500 people in each of the shelters, which are equipped with canteens. Recreation space, sick bays and isolation wards. It is unlikely that any further shelters of this type will be constructed owing to lack of time and materials. A view in one of the new deep shelters in London Sept. 18, 1942. The special cleaning machine employed is in use. The name of the bay of the shelter (each has its indivual name) and the endless tiers of bunk stretching as far as the eye can see.

PA 9968949 Mobile Canteens Of World War 2 (1939 1945) PA 11033797 1 Mobile Canteens Of World War 2 (1939 1945)

PA 9265005 Mobile Canteens Of World War 2 (1939 1945)

In order to fill the big demand for cooks in canteens and in other places, Britain is training men and women in school throughout the land. This is a scene in the National Training School of Cookery in London, March 31, 1942. The woman at the left is cutting up pie while the others are mixing dough for puddings, a favorite dessert in England.

PA 9418787 1 Mobile Canteens Of World War 2 (1939 1945)

An all-Norwegian Fighter Squadron equipped with Spitfires is now flying with the Royal Air Force. It has been in action since March this year and is doing fine work. Many members of the Squadron can tell thrilling stories of their escapes from their native country to take up arms again in Britain. The Norwegian Air Force, which is commanded by Rear Admiral Hjalmar Riiser-Larsen, the famous explorer, is trained in Canada, and then comes to this country for final training and to take up operational duties. Men of the Norwegian ground staff line up for refreshments at the mobile N.A.A.F.I. canteen in the Spitfire dispersal area, May 18, 1942.

PA 9206842 Mobile Canteens Of World War 2 (1939 1945)

PA 8830594 Mobile Canteens Of World War 2 (1939 1945)

The delegates visit a canteen in a Brussels school in Belgium on Jan 28, 1941. From left to right are: Mr. G. Murray, Mr. Mac Donald, and Mr. Frederic Dorsey Stephens, Head of the delegation.

PA 9147033 Mobile Canteens Of World War 2 (1939 1945)

A parcels office at a big London railway station has been opened as a canteen for soldiers passing through, in pursuance of a scheme to make the waiting time troops must spend at stations in these days more comfortable. Girl helpers are giving up several hours of their time each day to waiting on the troops. Lady Thomas pouring out tea for the troops at the canteen in the London railway station, Oct. 13, 1939.

PA 10875022 1 Mobile Canteens Of World War 2 (1939 1945) PA 10875024 1 Mobile Canteens Of World War 2 (1939 1945)

PA 11763761 Mobile Canteens Of World War 2 (1939 1945)

Nearly half of the post office staff consists of women now that the men are being absorbed into the forces. In their own training school they learn everything connected with the collection and delivery of the mail. A meal from the canteen forms a welcome lunch-time break after concentrated studies on Feb. 16, 1942.

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The Five Most Underrated Slasher Films of the 1980s http://www.anorak.co.uk/395216/keyposts/the-five-most-underrated-slasher-films-of-the-1980s.html/ http://www.anorak.co.uk/395216/keyposts/the-five-most-underrated-slasher-films-of-the-1980s.html/#comments Wed, 23 Apr 2014 15:18:59 +0000 http://www.anorak.co.uk/?p=395216 slasher7 300x171 The Five Most Underrated Slasher Films of the 1980s

 

FOLLOWING the incredible box-office and critical success of John Carpenter’s Halloween (1978), the slasher film quickly became the go-to-format for up-and-coming horror filmmakers in the 1980s.  These films had titles like Happy Birthday to Me (1981) and My Bloody Valentine (1981), and most of them concerned bloody massacres on holidays.

Although critics denigrated these slasher films as “dead teenager movies” or “knife-kill” films and slammed their apparent sense of misogyny, and formulaic story lines, the slasher craze of the epoch actually produced a number of great and memorable horror films.

In the thick of things, however, critics weren’t necessarily able to distinguish the good slasher films from the bad ones, and so below is a list of five slasher films that, on retrospect, are much better and much more artistic than their reputations indicate:

 

 

slasher1 300x177 The Five Most Underrated Slasher Films of the 1980s

 

5.         The Dorm that Dripped Blood (1981)

In this film from directors Jeffrey Obrow and Stephen Carpenter, five students (including one played by Daphne Zuniga) remain on their college campus over the Christmas holiday so as close-down and clean up an old dormitory building, Morgan Meadows Hall.

Alas, this assignment is hampered by the presence of a strange student, John Hemmit (Woody Roll), who may or may not be a psychotic killer.

Before long, the students are dropping like flies, and dying in gruesome fashion.   One student ends up in a deep fryer, for instance, and another is burned up in the building’s furnace.

Although all the familiar aspects of the slasher formula – from final girls to red herrings are present in The Dorm that Dripped Blood, the film nonetheless has some fiendish fun shuffling that familiar deck of cards.

For instance, the killer unexpectedly emerges from the victim pool, and his identity is a genuine surprise.  Similarly, the final sequence ends the film with a wholly unexpected and horrible death. The Dorm that Dripped Blood plays wickedly on such standards conventions — including audience assumptions about class – and emerges as genuinely unpredictable..

Like many slasher films of the period, The Dorm that Dripped Blood is colorfully-titled and incredibly violent in nature, but in sometimes shocking ways, the film manages to subvert the standard formula and thus seem fresh.

 

 

 slasher3 300x219 The Five Most Underrated Slasher Films of the 1980s

 

4.         The Prey (1984)

In The Prey, six young adults from the city, Nancy (Debbie Thureson), Joel (Steve Bond), Bobbie (Lori Lethin), Skip (Robert Wald), Gail (Gayle Gannes) and Greg (Philip Wenckus) hike into the thick woods at North Point, oblivious to the fact that a married couple was recently ax-murdered there while camping.

Before long, the young adults become the prey of a deformed gypsy (Carel Struycken). A heroic forest ranger (Jackson Bostwick) attempts to rescue the hikers, but his savage foe is unstoppable, and in search of a mate.

There’s a lot of stock footage of nature in The Prey (1984), on first glance an indication that the film is somehow padded to feature length.

And yet, in this case, the stock footage actually meaningfully serves the film’s man vs. nature theme.  After The Prey’s first, brutal ax murder, the audience gets long views of centipedes, frogs, spiders, and more wild-life. There are long shots of impressive mountain ranges, a spider’s web, and a majestic hawk overhead, searching for prey.

Then these pastoral views are cross-cut with an ugly view of modern man. A loud van arrives in the woods and out pour several obnoxious jerks. These youngsters turn up their radio, treat the land like shit, and, well, abundantly require a lesson in environmentalism. Before long, snakes, and a horny, deformed mountain man are sneaking into their camp, imperiling the city-folk, and reminding the babes in the woods that it’s not nice to fool with Mother Nature.

What remains admirable about The Prey is that it attempts, even if only via stock footage from some other production, to convey the idea of a real, living forest, an eco-system teeming with life forms other than man. The stock footage helps us to remember that we are not masters of nature, and that the campers have stepped into a realm of genuine danger.

And like The Dorm That Dripped Blood, The Prey also ends on an unbelievably horrible down note, as the film’s final girl suffers a fate worse than death in that living forest. This ending is either maddening or inspired, depending on your point of view, but it captures the film’s imaginative nature well.

 

 

slasher2 300x194 The Five Most Underrated Slasher Films of the 1980s

 

3.         Night Warning (1983)

This mostly-forgotten slasher film from director William Asher features buff Jimmy McNichol as poor Billy, a boy raised by his abusive and bizarre Aunt Cheryl (Susan Tyrrell) following the death of his parents.

Night Warning opens in fine form as we witness those deaths in the family. Billy’s Dad is decapitated when his car’s brakes fail, and he slams into the back of the log truck.  We actually see the log break through the windshield and pile-drive over the driver’s head.  In the thirty or so years since I first saw the film, I have never forgotten the impact of this death scene.

After that egregiously violent but unforgettable moment, Night Warning settles into a creepy story of a mother figure, Cheryl, obsessed with her young ward, no holds barred, no boundaries observed. Cheryl kittenishly tells Billy she will be his “date,” and spends most of her time poisoning his milk, a symbol of corrupt motherhood.  And of course, when others — like Julia Duffy’s character, Julie — threaten Cheryl’s bond with Billy, she contemplates bloody murder.

Night Warning also features a bizarre subplot about Billy’s sexual identity. Bill Paxton plays Eddie, a classmate of Billy’s who tells him during basketball practice to keep his “queer” hands off of him.  At another juncture, a police detective similarly accuses Billy of being the (gay) coach’s “butt boy.”

Between Cheryl’s overbearing and inappropriate mothering and all the graphic references to his sexual identity, Night Warning appears to be a slasher film about one boy’s effort to define himself on his own terms, and not those established by family or society.  Night Warning is freaky as Hell, and consequently quite disturbing.

 

 

slasher6 300x126 The Five Most Underrated Slasher Films of the 1980s

 

2.         The Funhouse (1981)

This horror film from the criminally under-appreciated Tobe Hooper has recently begun to get its critical due, but for many years after its release The Funhouse was routinely ignored and lumped in one with other “dead teenager” movies.

In a review for People Magazine in 1981, for instance, the critic observed that Hooper “ought to have moved on to better things…,” a comment that fails to address The Funhouse on its own artistic terms.

The Funhouse depicts the story of teenage Amy Harper (Elizabeth Berridge), a girl who decides to spend the night in the local amusement park with her three friends Buzz (Cooper Huckabee), Ritchie (Miles Chapin) and Liz (Largo Woodruff).  While trespassing in the funhouse, these teens witness the murder of a fortune teller, Madame Zena (Sylvia Miles) by the carnival barker’s (Kevin Conway) son, a creep in a Frankenstein mask (Wayne Doba).

This exceedingly-simple premise — a night of horror in a funhouse — escapes the slasher formula by quickly proving itself a meditation on double images, on the differences between horror that is real, and horror that is illusion.  From the earliest scenes, including Hooper’s homage to the shower scene from Hitchcock’s Psycho (1960), The Funhouse creates a clever duality between harmless images of horror entertainment and culture, and real human horror.

At the carnival, for instance, a magic show goes horribly wrong, but is revealed as a joke, an act created by an illusionist with fake blood, and props. Likewise, the funhouse itself is façade, a “family” amusement dedicated to harmless scares.

But soon the teens find themselves navigating the world underneath such safe imagery, and uncover true horror: family and sexual dysfunction.  The safe, age-old Frankenstein Monster mask comes off, and a new monstrous horror is revealed in its place.

Hooper’s point in the brilliantly-made film is that a scary “illusion”– like a carnival funhouse or Frankenstein Monster Mask — can actually be far “safer” to reckon with than a hidden, twisted widely-accepted reality despite societal hand-wringing about the horror genre.

The film’s final act blends The Funhouse’s two realities deftly, as the murdered teens literally become entangled with the funhouse ride and attractions.

 

 

slasher4 The Five Most Underrated Slasher Films of the 1980s

 

1.         Friday the 13th (1980)

This is the film that launched a franchise (that continues as late as 2009), and cemented the slasher film’s hold on the box office in the early 1980s.

And yet, the original Friday the 13th is a grossly-underrated film.  Wes Craven’s Scream (1996) picked up on this fact, after a fashion, when an imperiled Casey Becker (Drew Barrymore) named Jason as the villain of the 1980 film.  The truth is that the image of iconic, hockey-mask wearing Jason Voorhees has largely dominated the public’s perception of this film…even though he isn’t the villain of the piece.

In the original Friday the 13th, penned by Victor Miller, a group of camp counselors, led by Steve Christy (Peter Brouwer), prepare for the grand re-opening of Camp Crystal Lake over the objections of locals like Crazy Ralph (Walt Gorney).  Ralph’s objections stem from an incident in 1957, when camp counselors neglected a young boy, Jason (Ari Lehman), who then drowned in the lake.  Soon afterwards, two counselors were murdered.

But Steve is committed, and with the help of lovely and intelligent, Alice (Adrienne King) prepares to re-open the camp.  Almost immediately, however, as an unknown assailant begins killing the camp’s new staff.  A full-blown massacre occurs during a powerful thunderstorm, and the murderer is revealed as someone who was very close to young Jason…

At its core, Friday the 13th’s theme is, simply, innocence lost.  But a child, Jason dies in the lake while swimming…neglected by those he trusted.  And his mother, Mrs. Voorhees (Betsy Palmer) loses her beloved son and her innocence too — along with her mind – after the fatal incident.  Innocence is even broached in terms of the counselors, as they countenance their first sexual experiences.

The beauty of the natural environs around “Camp Blood” nicely reinforce the film-long conceit of an innocent, Garden of Eden-type setting, but one that is now corrupted or ruined.  One scene in Friday the 13th involves a snake inside one of the cabins, a snake in the garden, literally.  The snake is immediately, decapitated by a counselor’s machete, putting an end to the threat and thus restoring order.

Symbolically speaking, that moment is determinedly repeated in the film’s bloody denouement as Alice chops off the head of another snake in the garden – the killer – also utilizing a machete.  The two images connect, because in each case is dramatized the idea of natural order overturned by the presence of evil (a serpent, specifically…), and then order restored.

Some of the Friday the 13th sequels are good, some are bad, and some are indifferent, but the original is a well-made film that explores its theme well in visual terms.  The sequels (especially the bad ones…) have cast a kind of retroactive pall over the first film in the franchise — one that prevents critical appreciation of it — and that’s a shame.

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1,000 Weapons Confiscated From School Children, Include Knives, Scissors And Secateurs http://www.anorak.co.uk/395211/news/1000-weapons-confiscated-from-school-children-include-knives-scissors-and-secateurs.html/ http://www.anorak.co.uk/395211/news/1000-weapons-confiscated-from-school-children-include-knives-scissors-and-secateurs.html/#comments Wed, 23 Apr 2014 12:45:13 +0000 http://www.anorak.co.uk/?p=395211 SO. How did the Independent illustrate the story “Nearly 1,000 weapons confiscated from schoolchildren in the past three years”?

With a picture of some blades, scissors, a rusty strip of iron and… What’s that with the orange handles? Is it a pair of secateurs?

Cancel the gardening club.

 

 

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Enemy Of Free Speech Jim Ardis Executes The ‘Beyond Parody’ Defence http://www.anorak.co.uk/395203/politicians/enemy-of-free-speech-jim-ardis-executes-the-beyond-parody-defence.html/ http://www.anorak.co.uk/395203/politicians/enemy-of-free-speech-jim-ardis-executes-the-beyond-parody-defence.html/#comments Wed, 23 Apr 2014 11:23:20 +0000 http://www.anorak.co.uk/?p=395203 Screen shot 2014 04 23 at 12.10.36 Enemy Of Free Speech Jim Ardis Executes The Beyond Parody Defence

 

THE Journal Star has caught up with Jacob Elliott. He was arrested in the war on free speech. The Mayor or Peoria, one Jim Ardis, was very upset at the fake Twitter account, @Peoriamayor. He called the police.

Rather than laugh at Mr Ardis and advise him to respond to the spoof blog with humour and smiles, the police thought he had made a good point. How very dare anyone mock the Mayor. You can mock Jesus, God, Mohammed and even George Clooney, but mocking the Mayor of Peoria is a step too far.

Three judges agreed.

Judge Kirk Schoebein signed off on a warrant seeking subscriber information from Twitter.

Judge Lisa Wilson approved a warrant for Comcast to find out where the person who used the Internet to access Twitter lived

Judge Kim Kelley signed the warrant to search the home of the alleged parodists.

Respect for the man and his office must be preserved.

So. Armed and armoured, seven members of the Peoria police force raided Mr Elliott’s home and took him away for questioning.

Only, he didn’t do it. The parody was the work of Elliott’s roommate Jon Daniel. He too was was taken to the Peoria Police Department for questioning. He said nothing. And was soon freed without charge.

And Twitter removed the account. At first, Daniel hadn’t say it was parody, although it clearly was. He changed the biog to state ‘parody’, but by then it was too late for Twitter’s rule keepers. Helpfully, a new Twitter account mocking the idiotic Ardis is up. And it is a parody. Probably.

Back at Elliott’s home the goon platoon found was some weed. They arrested Elliott for possessing 30 to 500 grams of marijuana.

He tells the Star’s Matt Buedel and Andy Kravetz:

“I couldn’t believe this much force was being used for a fake Twitter account — it blew my mind. It was extremely frightening. I don’t think I’ve ever been so scared in my life.”

His pain did not end there. Elliott then gets the kind of newspaper write up no man envies:

Elliott — a 36-year-old, rail-thin man with thick glasses, thinning hair, a soft voice and…

We don’t get to know about Elliott’s nerdy T-shirt and unkept toe hair, but we do hear from him again:

“As soon as I opened the door, a female officer shoved her hand into my pocket and screamed, ‘What’s in your pocket?’”

(At which point he resisted all urge to say ‘Jim Ardis’.)

For his first offense, Elliott spent more than 48 hours in jail.

The state’s attorney’s office did not charge him in time for bonding court on Wednesday afternoon, leaving him without a way out of jail until at least 3 p.m. Thursday. When he finally did appear before a judge, his bond was set at $3,000 — meaning he needed $300 bail to get out.

And it gets worse:

“I’m suspended indefinitely right now. It’s up to the company to determine whether I can have my job back after all this. I’m pretty scared. I don’t have another source of income.”

All computers, tablets and video game seized in the raid remain in police custody.

Jim Ardis is clearly a fool. But he has his supporters, many of whom are in uniform.

Update: Ardis addressed the story of his idiocy, proving that his previous idiocy was no fluke:

“I still maintain my right to protect my identity is my right. Are there no boundaries on what you can say, when you can say it, who you can say it to? You can’t say (those tweets) on behalf of me. That’s my problem. This guy took away my freedom of speech.”

Is Jim Ardis beyond parody? Is he trying to be so absurd that he becomes parody-proof?

Watch this space…

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The Eight-Track Miracle: 8 Reasons It Failed http://www.anorak.co.uk/395146/technology/the-eight-track-miracle-8-reasons-it-failed.html/ http://www.anorak.co.uk/395146/technology/the-eight-track-miracle-8-reasons-it-failed.html/#comments Wed, 23 Apr 2014 06:13:40 +0000 http://www.anorak.co.uk/?p=395146  eight track 9 The Eight Track Miracle: 8 Reasons It Failed

 

WHEN eight-track tapes hit the shelves in the latter part of the Sixties, it was seen as a godsend.  All of a sudden, you could listen to your music collection in your car, or out-and-about with the new boom-boxes.  There were even rumors it would completely replace the vinyl record.  Yet, just over a decade later, the humble cassette tape was able to drive it to extinction.  Its heyday lasted from 1968-1975, and by 1980 the poor eight-track was in history’s dustbin, a sort-of laughable derelict from the Seventies.

So what happened? Here are 8 reasons for its untimely demise.

1. TOTALLY UNRELIABLE

 

eight track 2 The Eight Track Miracle: 8 Reasons It Failed

 

The primary reason the eight-track became extinct was because it was an unreliable piece of shit.  They simply weren’t built to last and subsequently earned a reputation as being ticking time bombs.  Truth be told, brand new eight-tracks often sounded good, and the tapes themselves were virtually indestructible: they never melted in the sun or cracked.  It was the internal components that started to fall to pieces over time.  If the manufacturers hadn’t opted for cheap construction, things might have turned out differently.

 

 

2.  CAR STEREOS HATED THEM

 

eight track 4 The Eight Track Miracle: 8 Reasons It Failed

 

Anyone who had an eight-track player in their car knows the trauma of having the tape eaten.  Owing to its problematic construction, the eight-track became notorious for becoming a tangled wretched mess…. usually during the best part of your favorite song.

 

 

3. THE ANNOYING SONG FADE OUT

 

eight track 5 The Eight Track Miracle: 8 Reasons It Failed

 

It was quite common for a single song on an album to fade out and fade back in as it transitioned to a new track.  Eight-track tapes consisted of actually 4 tracks (each in stereo, totaling 8).  Unfortunately, this meant that they had to be equal in length, which didn’t necessarily jive with the original LP.  Suffice it to say, things had to be adjusted and some songs had to be split into two parts – thus the annoying song fade out and in.

 

 

4. COPYRIGHT PROBLEMS

 

eight track 11 The Eight Track Miracle: 8 Reasons It Failed

 

Eight-tracks were the first music medium to introduce the issue of copyright protection.  The fact that you could easily record on them brought floods of illegal copies to truck stops and flea markets across the US.  There’s a famous story of Jerry Lee Lewis taking a baseball bat to a shelf of bootleg eight-tracks he came across when he stopped for gas.  However, the issue never became widespread enough to affect the way the music industry did business; it wasn’t until the mp3 format took hold that the foundations began to shake

 

eight track 8 The Eight Track Miracle: 8 Reasons It Failed

 

Funny.  I don’t remember this Beatles album. An 8-track bootleg.

But did the growing abundance of homemade eight-tracks really have anything to do with its downfall? After all, the cassette tape was geared toward making unlicensed recordings.  Perhaps it wasn’t directly responsible, but the ability to easily make backyard bootlegs didn’t do the eight-track any favors in the reputation department.  The music industry would learn to live with a degree of illegal copies on the market, but the eight-track absorbed the initial scorn.

 

 

5. FILTHY AND TRASHY MUSIC COLLECTION OF SHAME

 

eight track 1 The Eight Track Miracle: 8 Reasons It Failed

 

Despite the fact that eight-tracks began as techno-marvels, developed by Bill Lear (of Lear Jets no less), they soon earned a reputation as being not only unreliable, but also tacky.  As I mentioned, the case was basically bulletproof, but the sticker was not.  Thus, everyone’s collection consisted of sturdy cartridges with worn, peeling and stained stickers.  There was no real outer decorative case as with CDs and cassettes, just the cartridge.  And so, unlike the source of pride which was your record collection, the filthy eight-track collection often became a thing of shame in the floorboard of your car.

 

 

6. YOU CAN’T REWIND

 

eight track 6 The Eight Track Miracle: 8 Reasons It Failed

 

It may seem trivial, but not being able to rewind become a real downside to the eight-track.  It was a breath of fresh air to be able to roll backwards with the cassette tape. This negative wasn’t quite outweighed by a strong positive quality of the eight-track: it was on an infinite loop. While the cassette and record would abruptly stop when it reached the end of a side, the eight-track would play for all eternity…. or at least a few hours before it busted.

 

 

7. THE DREADED BLEED-THROUGH

 

eight track 7 The Eight Track Miracle: 8 Reasons It Failed

 

I won’t go into the mechanics of the eight-track (there’s always Wikipedia for that).  I’ll just point out that, if the heads became misaligned even slightly (a VERY common occurrence) the one track would bleed-through into another track.  Worst case scenario: two songs at equal pitch playing at the same time.  Best case: a faint background of an altogether different track.  Either way, it was a thoroughly miserable listening experience.

 

 

8. CASSETTES ARE CHEAP

 

eight track 3 The Eight Track Miracle: 8 Reasons It Failed

 

Ultimately isn’t this what it all boils down to?  If the eight-track had been a pinch more reliable and worked out its kinks, perhaps the lower price wouldn’t have been such a death blow.  In other words, the cassette wasn’t exactly a revelation the way CDs and mp3s seemed to be at first; so, there was no reason to think a slightly lower price would matter so much.  But since the eight-track was under-delivering, all it took was a competing product being just a couple dollars cheaper.

 

eight track 10 The Eight Track Miracle: 8 Reasons It Failed

 

File under 8-tracks we’d love to have seen.  Perhaps an Atari-8-track combo would’ve given it just enough cool points to stay around a few years longer.

But let’s not be too hard on the eight-track.  For a few years, it was awesome and we loved it.  Like all technologies, it got supplanted by something else.  Indeed, the cassette’s reign of glory was short lived as well; barely making it out of the eighties before the CD beat it into submission.  Then the CD became overshadowed by iTunes and mp3s…. and so it goes.

As for myself – I’ve stuck with records and am quite happy.

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Wonderfully Sexist Dating Advice From 1938 http://www.anorak.co.uk/395128/news/flashback/wonderfully-sexist-dating-advice-from-1938.html/ http://www.anorak.co.uk/395128/news/flashback/wonderfully-sexist-dating-advice-from-1938.html/#comments Tue, 22 Apr 2014 19:27:38 +0000 http://www.anorak.co.uk/?p=395128 IT’S 1938. Your breath is fresh, so you’ve pulled. And you’re on a date. What next?

 

dating 1938 7 Wonderfully Sexist Dating Advice From 1938 dating 1938 81 Wonderfully Sexist Dating Advice From 1938

dating 1938 9 Wonderfully Sexist Dating Advice From 1938 dating 1938 Wonderfully Sexist Dating Advice From 1938 dating 1938 1 Wonderfully Sexist Dating Advice From 1938

dating 1938 2 Wonderfully Sexist Dating Advice From 1938

dating 1938 3 Wonderfully Sexist Dating Advice From 1938 dating 1938 4 Wonderfully Sexist Dating Advice From 1938 dating 1938 5 Wonderfully Sexist Dating Advice From 1938

dating 1938 8 Wonderfully Sexist Dating Advice From 1938 dating 1938 11 Wonderfully Sexist Dating Advice From 1938 dating 1938 12 Wonderfully Sexist Dating Advice From 1938

 

Spotter: Imgur

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Slacks Relapse: A Look At Chick Pants Of The 1970s http://www.anorak.co.uk/395059/the-consumer/fashion/slacks-relapse-a-look-at-chick-pants-of-the-1970s.html/ http://www.anorak.co.uk/395059/the-consumer/fashion/slacks-relapse-a-look-at-chick-pants-of-the-1970s.html/#comments Tue, 22 Apr 2014 05:17:42 +0000 http://www.anorak.co.uk/?p=395059 vintage slacks 1 Slacks Relapse: A Look At Chick Pants Of The 1970s

 

OTHER than a brief Capri pants fad during the early Sixties, women rarely wore pants in public. It was dresses and skirts only. Then the Women’s Liberation movement hit its stride in the Seventies, and the ladies started to get in on the pants action. Just as the miniskirt had been a proclamation of the youth culture, pants became a proclamation of gender equality. If men can wear hideous corduroy bell-bottoms, by God, the women can too!

Yes, it was unfortunate that this new-found fashion liberation landed smack dab in the Seventies – a time not known for its exemplary taste in attire. Indeed, women started jumping into slacks at time when they were high waisted, butt-hugging, and ultra-flared at the bottoms. Men wanted the miniskirt back, but it was too late. Trousers were in, and there wasn’t a damn thing anyone could do about it.

 

vintage slacks 9 Slacks Relapse: A Look At Chick Pants Of The 1970s

What’s the only thing worse than a pair of ‘70s polyester pants? The answer: the dreaded pantsuit. These highly unflattering slacks had an elastic waistband that was so high, it nearly reached the armpit. The addition of a matching top only made things worse. The pantsuit was perhaps the low-watermark of the decade, followed closely by Vietnam and Watergate.

 

vintage slacks 7 Slacks Relapse: A Look At Chick Pants Of The 1970s

You’ll note that women generally wore platforms or wedges, otherwise their feet would be completely lost beneath the umbrella of the bell bottom. Many of you may recall the tremendous amount of static electricity generated by bell bottom cuffs grazing the carpet as you walked. You could shock the hell out of your friends by simply touching them with your finger.

 

vintage slacks 3 Slacks Relapse: A Look At Chick Pants Of The 1970s

 

You’ll also recall that the shirts were never untucked, and since the style was both high-wasted and ultra-tight up top, this presented problems. A tucked-in shirt would be painfully obvious bunched-up underneath; with unpleasant looking wrinkles and bumps in the ass area. What to do? The answer is in the picture insert above: “bodyshirts”.

 

vintage slacks 11 Slacks Relapse: A Look At Chick Pants Of The 1970s

 

The bodyshirt wasn’t some strange and rare ‘70s anomaly; those of you who lived it can attest that bodyshirts were commonplace. So, to review: the advent of chick pants necessitated two fashion adaptations – (1) the platform shoe to cope with the bell-bottoms and (2) the bodyshirt to cope with the ass-hugging high-waistline. I’m inclined to think sticking with dresses might’ve been a whole lot easier.

 

vintage slacks 6 Slacks Relapse: A Look At Chick Pants Of The 1970s

 

I happen to love ‘70s fashions, but there’s a limit to what I can handle. This page from a 1970 catalog illustrates my tipping point, where I’m no longer on board with ‘70s styles. How in the name of all that is holy was this ever considered attractive? Or am I just missing the point altogether – that this was a statement of gender equality, and the less attractive it looked, the better. If so, they succeeded handily.

 

vintage slacks 4 Slacks Relapse: A Look At Chick Pants Of The 1970s

Form-fitting polyester isn’t very forgiving when it comes to tracing the contour of a backside. You’re going to need all the help you can get erasing even the slightest pantyline or dimple. Pray the “Easy-care Dacron polyester gabardine” keeps things smooth.

Or you could just go with black, the great concealer…

 

vintage slacks 2 Slacks Relapse: A Look At Chick Pants Of The 1970s

 

But let’s not get carried away. Wear this number in public and you’re in danger of being mistaken for a superhero of some kind. Although, I wouldn’t recommend fighting crime in open-toed shoes.

 

vintage slacks 5 Slacks Relapse: A Look At Chick Pants Of The 1970s

 

“Cling of bodysweater
Flare of pants -
Wow, what a great look!”

 

Sadly, the fashions soon spread to all age groups. What started as a progressive fashion statement soon became a shame for the whole family to bear. Of course, I’m no fan of today’s baggy pants either, so perhaps it wasn’t so bad.

….Okay, it really was bad. There’s no sugar-coating it. ‘70s chick slacks were freaking awful….. ‘70’s chick jeans on the other hand were divine.

 

vintage slacks 10 Slacks Relapse: A Look At Chick Pants Of The 1970s

This is like a wet dream for the lactose tolerant. All the horrific trademarks are there: form fitting, high-waisted with huge flares. Yet, all is forgiven. Like the country singer, Conway Twitty, was wont to declare: “Lord I love that lady wearin’ tight fittin’ jeans.”

 

THE ENDS

vintage slacks 8 Slacks Relapse: A Look At Chick Pants Of The 1970s

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‘The Daily Mail Timeline of Shame, For Your Viewing and Sharing Pleasure’ http://www.anorak.co.uk/395043/news/the-daily-mail-timeline-of-shame-for-your-viewing-and-sharing-pleasure.html/ http://www.anorak.co.uk/395043/news/the-daily-mail-timeline-of-shame-for-your-viewing-and-sharing-pleasure.html/#comments Mon, 21 Apr 2014 20:20:25 +0000 http://www.anorak.co.uk/?p=395043 ON Twitter @DickGraceless has produced the “Daily Mail timeline of shame, for your viewing and sharing pleasure”.

daily mail timeline of shame The Daily Mail Timeline of Shame, For Your Viewing and Sharing Pleasure

 

 

 

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The Problem With Whistling: Teen Sets World Record For The Highest Note Ever Whistled http://www.anorak.co.uk/395015/strange-but-true/the-problem-with-whistling-teen-sets-world-record-for-the-highest-note-ever-whistled.html/ http://www.anorak.co.uk/395015/strange-but-true/the-problem-with-whistling-teen-sets-world-record-for-the-highest-note-ever-whistled.html/#comments Mon, 21 Apr 2014 08:27:51 +0000 http://www.anorak.co.uk/?p=395015 whistling  The Problem With Whistling: Teen Sets World Record For The Highest Note Ever Whistled

THE more specious the world record, the more Anorak appreciates it. So, to Walker Harnden, 19, from Pittsboro, North Carolina, who has whistled the highest note ever.

Harnden, a student of the oboe at The UNC School of the Arts in Winston-Salem, has had his whistle certified and posted by The Guinness Book of World Records, which reports:

The highest note whistled is a B7 (3951 Hz), which was achieved by Walker Harnden (USA) at the Hoad Recital Hall, University of North Carolina School of the Arts in Winston Salem, North Carolina, USA, on 7 November 2013. The “B7” note is the B just below the high C on a piano.

Anyone keen to best Harnden should know that he whistles “all the time,” up to four or five hours a day. A third of his waking day is spent whistling.

Whistling can be a sign of happiness or insouciance. But to someone stood next to a whistler, particularly one who can blow for hours at a time, it produces the opposite effect. It is a trigger for anger and stress. You view the whistler as self-involved, a person who cares not for anyone else. The whistler hears the upbeat opening bars to Bobby McFerrin’s Don’t Worry Be Happy. The listener hears someone using a cheese grater on their eardrums in a sarcastic and invasive manner.

Whistling can be sinister. Tom and Jerry taught us that. So did that old reprobate Mickey Mouse:

In this clip, Terry Bigham notes how whistling can be precursor to a crime, a sign of evil intent:

Fritz Lang, by his own admission, didn’t know beans about music. Yet, when he tackled this first German sound film, he decided to give Peter Lorre’s killer a whistled motif to announce his presence. Ironically, Lorre couldn’t whistle so Lang himself wound up performing Grieg’s “Mountain King” theme from “Peer Gynt”.

Anyone whistling for five hours a day is bound to cause upset. I picture Harnden in his class; the teacher is struggling to illustrate a point; his wife has left him; he is behind on the mortgage payment; then he hears whistling. He can react with violence or simply roll into a ball and sob. It’s unlikely he’ll join in with the whistling on Always Look On The Bright Side of Life.

But maybe he and you should just give in. You are with either with the whistler, or you are the enemy.

 

 

Whistle ad Spotter: Harvard

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Khat In 1985: The North Yemen Artisan Chews Khat Surrounded By His Daggers And Swords http://www.anorak.co.uk/395012/news/flashback/khat-in-1985-the-north-yemen-artisan-chews-khat-surrounded-by-his-daggers-and-swords.html/ http://www.anorak.co.uk/395012/news/flashback/khat-in-1985-the-north-yemen-artisan-chews-khat-surrounded-by-his-daggers-and-swords.html/#comments Mon, 21 Apr 2014 08:26:25 +0000 http://www.anorak.co.uk/?p=395012 FLASHBACK to January 11, 1985: The Khat Man:

His cheek stuffed with khat, an artisan specializing in daggers and swords sits in his tiny booth at the old souk, or marketplace in ancient Sanaa, a city in North Yemen on Jan. 11, 1985 which hasn’’t changed materially since the seventh century. Camel caravans and donkey carts are still in use and swords and daggers are worn by most men. (AP Photo/Aly Mahmoud)

PA 10469895 1 Khat In 1985: The North Yemen Artisan Chews Khat Surrounded By His Daggers And Swords

 

For more on khat, see here.

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Garden Centres Lose £5,000 A Day From Outmoded Religiously Sectarian Rules http://www.anorak.co.uk/395001/money/garden-centres-lose-5000-a-day-from-outmoded-religiously-sectarian-rules.html/ http://www.anorak.co.uk/395001/money/garden-centres-lose-5000-a-day-from-outmoded-religiously-sectarian-rules.html/#comments Mon, 21 Apr 2014 07:23:52 +0000 http://www.anorak.co.uk/?p=395001 PA 15547434 Garden Centres Lose £5,000 A Day From Outmoded Religiously Sectarian Rules

Get thee to a garden cengtre

 

THE claim is that garden centres lose £5,000 each by being forced to close on Easter Sunday. This is, of course, an intolerable imposition of Christian rules on a country that isn’t in fact very Christian any more.

However, it should be said that their claim doesn’t have quite as much power to it as they seem to think:

Garden centres want rules reviewed which force them to close on Easter Sunday, causing them to lose up to £75m in takings.

The Horticultural Trades Association (HTA) said trading rules, which force shops of more than 3,000 sq ft (280 sq m) to close on Easter Sunday and Christmas Day are old fashioned and should be reviewed, allowing families to enjoy garden centres for longer.

They also said the laws mean garden centres lose out on around £5,500 each by staying shut for the day.

Raoul Curtis-Machin of the HTA told BBC News: “That’s a potential economic boost to the country of up to £75m.”

It’s that economic boost to the country thing there that is wrong. It’s true that if those shops all stayed open and if they all sold £5,000 worth of gear then recorded GDP would change by £75 million. We would have £75 million more GDP recorded in the garden centre sector. However, just because garden centres are open on one extra day7 does not mean that shoppers are going to spend more in garden centres. We would expect at least some of that being spent to move from other days. Easter Monday takings, or Good Friday ones, might well fall as a result of being open on Easter Sunday.

And it’s also true that the total amount of what people spend on everything isn’t going to change as a result of people being able to buy aspidistras on Easter Sunday. What isn’t spent in garden centres will be spent in cafes, fish and chip shops, pubs, whatever.

Being open or not being open on Easter Sunday will really only change that portion of what we’re all going to spend anyway that goes to garden centres: and much of the extra turnover will be the movement of purchases at garden centres from one day to another. There won’t be any change in overall GDP as a result of their being able to open that one extra day.

All of this is nothing to do with whether they should be open on that day, whether we are being religiously sectarian in insisting upon these rules, but the argument they’re putting forward themselves just doesn’t really work.

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45 Chart Busting Cover Girls Of Top Hits Albums http://www.anorak.co.uk/394951/news/flashback/45-chart-busting-cover-girls-of-top-hits-albums.html/ http://www.anorak.co.uk/394951/news/flashback/45-chart-busting-cover-girls-of-top-hits-albums.html/#comments Mon, 21 Apr 2014 07:18:51 +0000 http://www.anorak.co.uk/?p=394951 chart buster 44 45 Chart Busting Cover Girls Of Top Hits Albums

 

IN DECADES PAST, records store shelves were filled with tons of compilation records featuring top hits from various artists. The K-Tel variety always used big bold fonts and tiny pictures of the musicians whose songs appeared on the album. However, the vast majority of these types of records followed a very strict formula when it came to their album covers. They contained two and only two items: (1) a plain track list and (2) a stone cold fox dressed to kill. That’s it. Here are a whopping 45 examples, and I think you’ll agree – the formula works!

 

chart buster 30 45 Chart Busting Cover Girls Of Top Hits Albums

 

It should be noted that 99 percent of these records are not from the US – they were perhaps a bit too risqué for mainstream America. The K-Tel records of The States were much more tame and palatable for large chain stores to put on the shelves. European sensibilities didn’t seem to mind the smoking hot babes in very little clothing decorating their compilation LP’s; however, they were definitely not a good fit for mass consumption in The States.

 

chart buster 5 45 Chart Busting Cover Girls Of Top Hits Albums

 

It should also be mentioned that most of these compilation records did not feature recordings by the original artists.  So, while “Hot Hits 15″ above says it contains “Crocodile Rock”, it’s unlikely Elton sings it.  In fact, some of these were such rip-offs that the tracks were not only cover versions, but instrumentals.  Indeed, you never knew what you were getting into when you picked up one of these records: original tracks by original artists… or elevator music versions of your favorite hits.

 

chart buster 45 45 Chart Busting Cover Girls Of Top Hits Albums

 

What in the name of all that is holy would compel someone to lay down five bucks to hear a crummy cover version of Kenny Roger’s “Coward of the County”?   A short skirt and cleavage, that’s what.  Don’t underestimate the power of a scantily clad woman to make a man do stupid things.

 

chart buster 40 45 Chart Busting Cover Girls Of Top Hits Albums

chart buster 43 45 Chart Busting Cover Girls Of Top Hits Albums

 

Next to the boring and wildly unsexy K-Tel records, Top of the Pops  was the most popular variety of compilation records.

 

chart buster 39 45 Chart Busting Cover Girls Of Top Hits Albums

chart buster 42 45 Chart Busting Cover Girls Of Top Hits Albums

 

Take note of the staggering variety of top hit compilation records there were.  K-Tel and Top of the Pops may have been the most popular, but they were by no means the only game in town.  12 Tops, Parade of Pops, Made in England, Hot Hits, .. the list is endless.  I’ve tried to include a variety in this list to illustrate the amazing diversity, all adhering to the same template:  a simple list of the tracks alongside a stone cold fox.

 

chart buster 38 45 Chart Busting Cover Girls Of Top Hits Albums

 

Only on a top hits record can you find “Shaft” and “I’d Like to Teach the World to Sing” living in perfect harmony.  It’s a beautiful thing.

 

chart buster 36 45 Chart Busting Cover Girls Of Top Hits Albums

 

You’ll notice that the song “Popcorn” pops up on an inordinate number of these top hits records.  Say what you want about the song , it’s an amazing pop culture artifact if only for its longevity and international success. The song was a hit literally around the world from Ireland to the Ukraine to Taiwan. Unfortunately for the composer, Gershon Kingley, a lot of the time foreign bands were covering the song with no royalties paid. “Popcorn” simply crossed too many borders to keep track of!

It has historical significance since it was one of the first examples of a successful synth pop song. Kingsley wrote it in a whopping 30 seconds, and put it on an album Music To Moog By (1969), which easily could have gone unnoticed along with so many other “Music to (fill in the blank)” albums of its ilk.  Upon its release in 1972 by Hot Butter, literally hundreds of cover versions sprouted up around the globe and it landed on more than its fare share of top hits albums.

 

chart buster 13 45 Chart Busting Cover Girls Of Top Hits Albums

 

There’s our old friend “Popcorn”.

 

chart buster 23 45 Chart Busting Cover Girls Of Top Hits Albums

 

More “Popcorn”….

 

chart buster 25 45 Chart Busting Cover Girls Of Top Hits Albums

 

… and even more “Popcorn”.  I’ll stop here – I think I’ve made my point.

 

chart buster 37 45 Chart Busting Cover Girls Of Top Hits Albums

 

These top hits albums aren’t just a good resource for smoking hot babes striking a pose for the easily duped male consumers – the women’s fashions are also extremely interesting.  It’s like taking a walk through a vintage fashion catalog designed by horny 1970s males.

Some of the fashions are….  (how do I put this delicately?)…… interesting.

 

chart buster 35 45 Chart Busting Cover Girls Of Top Hits Albums

 

She’s wearing striped socks which reach up to her thighs, and a top made out of what looks to be Muppet fur.   Like I said – the fashions are interesting.

Here’s another above-the-knee striped sock for good measure….

 

chart buster 3 45 Chart Busting Cover Girls Of Top Hits Albums

chart buster 32 45 Chart Busting Cover Girls Of Top Hits Albums

 

Let’s see if you’ve been paying attention.  What would compel an ordinarily rational human being to buy cover versions of “My Ding-A-Ling” and “Ben”?

Answer:  Side boob.

 

chart buster 31 45 Chart Busting Cover Girls Of Top Hits Albums

 

From Scandinavia to Eastern Europe to Latin America – the faultless template remained intact.  Simple track list with scantily clad mama.  A universal model that remained unbroken throughout the 1970s.

 

chart buster 28 45 Chart Busting Cover Girls Of Top Hits Albums

chart buster 29 45 Chart Busting Cover Girls Of Top Hits Albums

 

Album oriented rock has long since died; we live in an age where the single is all that matters.  No one cares about the album as a whole, just the hit single.  It would seem that our times are perfectly suited for the compilation record. Yet, since things have migrated to mp3s and iTunes, there’s no room for the sexy album cover to work its magic on unwary males.    Sadly, it seems these mildly erotic top hits records will forever remain a thing of the past.

 

chart buster 27 45 Chart Busting Cover Girls Of Top Hits Albums

 

I imagine the photographer commanding his models to “look sexy…. maybe start rubbing yourself.”  Hence, the preponderance of chicks sensually manhandling themselves.  It’s a gloriously synergistic combination of eroticism and awkwardness that words can’t describe.

 

chart buster 33 45 Chart Busting Cover Girls Of Top Hits Albums

chart buster 26 45 Chart Busting Cover Girls Of Top Hits Albums

 

Also take note that these “top hits”, “hot hits”, ‘smash hits”, etc. often weren’t even currently on the charts.  These record companies weren’t above using the “track list + sexy girl” template on some tired moldy oldies as well.

 

chart buster 9 45 Chart Busting Cover Girls Of Top Hits Albums

chart buster 24 45 Chart Busting Cover Girls Of Top Hits Albums

 

Disco was perfectly suited for the top hits album.  It was single driven (no contextual link to their respective LP’s whatsoever), and it was so synthetic and beat driven, it almost didn’t matter if it was the original artist.

 

chart buster 22 45 Chart Busting Cover Girls Of Top Hits Albums

chart buster 14 45 Chart Busting Cover Girls Of Top Hits Albums

 

The top hits girls were like an extension of Page 3.  Nothing wrong with that.

 

chart buster 41 45 Chart Busting Cover Girls Of Top Hits Albums

chart buster 21 45 Chart Busting Cover Girls Of Top Hits Albums

 

Truth be told, it was hard to find Scandinavian top hits records to include in this article.  This isn’t because there were so few; rather, because they so often contained nudity.   The Swedes took the template to a whole new level that was consistently NSFW.  The Germans were no slouches either.

 

chart buster 19 45 Chart Busting Cover Girls Of Top Hits Albums

chart buster 18 45 Chart Busting Cover Girls Of Top Hits Albums

chart buster 20 45 Chart Busting Cover Girls Of Top Hits Albums

chart buster 16 45 Chart Busting Cover Girls Of Top Hits Albums

chart buster 17 45 Chart Busting Cover Girls Of Top Hits Albums

chart buster 4 45 Chart Busting Cover Girls Of Top Hits Albums

 

Many famous artists had their start working as anonymous studio musicians churning out the cover versions included on these records –  Elton John, Larry Adler, and David Bowie to name a few.

 

chart buster 10 45 Chart Busting Cover Girls Of Top Hits Albums

 

In addition to providing work for aspiring musicians, the top hits records also provided work for aspiring models.  You may recognize many of the girls in this post.  Please leave a comment if you can identify them.

 

chart buster 7 45 Chart Busting Cover Girls Of Top Hits Albums

 

I think this “Chartbusters” record earns the award for strangest attire…. and that’s saying something considering the peculiar clothing her top hits colleagues were prone to wear.

 

chart buster 6 45 Chart Busting Cover Girls Of Top Hits Albums

 

Why were there so damn many of these?  Are males so easily swayed by a glimpse of feminine booty that they completely lose the ability to reason? Well, there are two simple reasonable reasons for picking up one of these records (aside from the cleavage):

1. Availability:  You didn’t have to go to a record store to pick a top hits record.  They were found at bookshops and supermarkets.  Due to their ubiquity, they were a lot more likely to be snatched up via an impulse buy than your average LP.

2. Cost: It’s a lot more economical to purchase a budget priced cover hits LP than purchase all 12 singles.

 

chart buster 1 45 Chart Busting Cover Girls Of Top Hits Albums

chart buster 46 45 Chart Busting Cover Girls Of Top Hits Albums

 

Hot Hits were the first to saturate the market with compilation LPs.  Their motto was  ”Can you tell the difference between these and the original sounds?” You absolutely could, but it didn’t matter.  The records sold by the hundreds of thousands, uncontested until the Top of the Pops records emerged in 1968.

At that point, it became a war between MFP (Hot Hits) and TOTP.  TOTP was the first to instigate the cheesecake template (up until ’68, MFP had been using bland covers akin to K-Tel) and ultimately TOTP would emerge victorious.

 

chart buster 34 45 Chart Busting Cover Girls Of Top Hits Albums

chart buster 8 45 Chart Busting Cover Girls Of Top Hits Albums

 

You might have noticed that this whole top hits phenomenon was as white as the wind-driven snow.  European covers rarely featured women of color.

 

chart buster 11 45 Chart Busting Cover Girls Of Top Hits Albums

chart buster 2 45 Chart Busting Cover Girls Of Top Hits Albums

chart buster 12 45 Chart Busting Cover Girls Of Top Hits Albums

 

Now we arrive in the 1980s.  By then, the cassette tape was rearing its ugly head, and the LP would soon become an endangered species.  Naturally, the sexy top hits albums also went bye-bye.  You needed a big canvas to broadcast your vinyl vixens.  The microscopic picture on the cassette simply didn’t have the dimensions to lure horny men to impulse buy.  Thus, the Golden Age of the Top Hits Template came to a close.

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Kyron Horman: Caring Hearts Want Step-Mum Terri Tortured And Killed http://www.anorak.co.uk/394940/news/kyron-horman-caring-hearts-want-step-mum-terri-tortured-and-killed.html/ http://www.anorak.co.uk/394940/news/kyron-horman-caring-hearts-want-step-mum-terri-tortured-and-killed.html/#comments Sun, 20 Apr 2014 21:00:38 +0000 http://www.anorak.co.uk/?p=394940 KYRON Horman: Anorak’s look at the missing Portland, Oregon, boy in the news. Today we spot a message for Kyron’s step-mother Terry Horman on Facebook. An ‘Elizabeth Degroff-Crego’ wants Terri tortured sent to Hell:

 

kyron horman Kyron Horman: Caring Hearts Want Step Mum Terri Tortured And Killed

 

A reader writes:

Let’s add this up – blogs sites set up condemning TH non-stop; even a blog site re her son James; FaceBooks set up by those filled with hatred for TH, condemning TH, planning actions to take against TH, ie. (alleged) stalking, harassing, talk of using gasoline to burn her neighborhood; various people going to Roseburg taking videos of TH when she leaves her home; Desiree [Young, Kyron's birth mother] and her disciples going to Roseburg to stand in front of the Moulton’s home carrying signs ‘Where is Kyron Terri?’, and chalking that question on the street in front of her home.

This looks like the Wild West where everything goes!

Four years next month and idiot police haven’t found Kyron, and people are questioning if they are still even searching. They have not named Terri Horman as a suspect or even a Person Of Interest, yet the cops are using the media and the mob to do their dirty work. Sheesh – they haven’t even established what crime – if any – befell the missing child.

In other news, Terri and Kaine got a divorce in December 2013. Kaine Horman filed for divorce on June 28, 2010, 24 days after 7-year-old Kyron, was last seen at Skyline Elementary School in rural Northwest Portland.

It was her third marriage; and his second.

According to the divorce document obtained by the Oregonian:

  • Terri Horman will pay $224 a month in child support, due the first of every month. Meanwhile, Kaine Horman will remain responsible for Kiara’s health-care and day-care costs.
  • Kiara will start kindergarten in the fall, and child support will be re-calculated then.
  • Terri Horman will maintain a $100,000 life insurance policy, with Kiara listed as the benificiary.
  • Terri Horman will receive 73.3% of Kaine Horman’s Intel 401(k) retirement contribution plan as of Dec. 27, 2013.
  • Kaine Horman will keep his house on Northwest Sheltered Nook Road in Portland. Terri Horman lives in Roseburg with her parents.
  • Terri Horman will keep her Ford Mustang.
  • Kaine Horman will keep a 2005 Ford truck and a John Deere tractor.

The pair agreed the divorce just two days before they were set to go to trial.

Terri has filed for custody of Kiara (who Kaine has not let her see for 4 years). That hearing is scheduled for June, with the court docket showing 3 days have been reserved for it. This custody hearing should be interesting as it has been claimed that Terri was the last person we know to see Kyron.

Such are the facts…

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