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News | Anorak - Part 35

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We don’t just report off-beat news, breaking news and digest the best and worst of the news media analysis and commentary. We give an original take on what happened and why. We add lols, satire, news photos and original content.

Witch Hunt Update: Lord Janner Case Dead And Buried (Like Him)

 

Lord Janner is in the clear.

That the peer and former Labour MP is dead is not part of his plea. Plans were to try his corpse in a court of law in what is laughably called a ‘Trial

Posted: 15th, January 2016 | In: News, Politicians | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Scientist says global warming creates humans with webbed fingers, three eyes and more hair

We glimpse into the future with paleoanthropologist Dr. Matthew Skinner of the University of Kent. He says that as the world’s temperature alters, we will see humanity adopt. You will grow webbed feet and fingers, a third eyelid and lots

Posted: 14th, January 2016 | In: News, Technology | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


David Bowie: the most ludicrous tribute of them all

This might be the most trite David Bowie tribute of the lot. In New Zealand one local paper asks ‘whose shirt are you wearing?’ ‪#‎davidbowie‬

 

bowie tribute

 

Next week: which tin can is

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Posted: 14th, January 2016 | In: Celebrities, News | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Daily Mail publishes ‘loving’ picture of dying kangaroo being raped

kanagaroo dying

 

Jane Fryer sees the picture of the kangaroos “in the shade of a Australian mango tree”. She sees the “last loving embrace for a dying kangaroo”. Fryer says the male kangaroo “tired to revive his mate” as his little

Posted: 14th, January 2016 | In: News, Strange But True, Tabloids | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Oh No! They’ve made David Bowie a role model, like the Queen Mum

David Bowie is being praised in death by such unlikely sources as the BBC, Daily Mail and every other media outfit who favours the safe over the daring.

The Daily Star  is leading calls for

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Posted: 13th, January 2016 | In: Celebrities, News | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Beating back pain over and over in the Daily Express

How dod I beat back pain? Funny you should ask. The Daily Express has news on just how to beat back pain.

 

daily express back pain

 

Standing up and moving forward i.e. walking can help.

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Posted: 12th, January 2016 | In: News, Tabloids | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


New York Times RIP: ‘It’s a good time to be David Bowie’

The British dead tree Press utterly missed David Bowie’s death. The USA had a few hours more to digest news of the Thin White Duke’ passing.

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Posted: 11th, January 2016 | In: Celebrities, News | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


David Cameron has died: newsreader mistakes PM for David Bowie

david cameron dies

 

David Cameron has died. Well, so says Fiona Winchester, a newsreader for Heart FM.

Whoops! Her mistake.

That’s

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Posted: 11th, January 2016 | In: Celebrities, News, Politicians, TV & Radio | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Coroner shares his hilarious response to a court-room exchange

One Coroner in court has shared his response to cross-examination:

Courtroom Exchange Of The Day

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Posted: 9th, January 2016 | In: News | Comments (13) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Daily Star stirs fear of migrant perverts and filthy idiots abroad

daily star immigrants

 

The Daily Star once supported the EDL. The paper today brings news that “MIGRANT PERVERTS” are a “THREAT TO UK GIRLS”.

Surely more perverts means more customers for the Daily Star (see more on the paper’s Page 3) and …

Posted: 8th, January 2016 | In: News, Tabloids | Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Wotsits: the tabloids’ favourite fat snack

wotsits

 

The Sun newspaper loves Wotsits and those people who eat the cheesy puffs.

WOTSIT?

I’ve lived on Wotsits and chocs for 12yrs – 2008

Back then we met Rachel Scowcroft, 12, who had eaten one hot meal in her

Posted: 7th, January 2016 | In: News, Strange But True | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Simon Danczuk: Oral sex, rape and Rochdale lab rats

danczuk

 

Danczuk: a look at Labour MP in the media.

The Sun: “Karen Danczuk probed by police over oral sex claim against sex-text MP’s ex”

Probed. Eu!

EXCLUSIVE: Selfie queen claimed love rival romped with married MP

It’s tight sportswear

Posted: 5th, January 2016 | In: News, Politicians | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Is Siddartha Dhar A British spy?

tumblr_o0g7klqfKK1u5f06vo1_1280

 

Snuff TV’s Jihadi John 2 the replacement for the first Jihadi John who left the planet in series 1 is Siddartha Dhar. The Star says Dhar “fled Britain with his wife and child after police missed a

Posted: 5th, January 2016 | In: News | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


British man arrested in Krygyzstan for sausage horse penis gag

Michael McFeat, 39, of Abernethy, is in  Krygyzstan , where he works at the Kumtor gold mine.

As part of the Hogmanay celebrations, McFeat is served a sausage horse meat dish called the chuchuk. He considers the hideous lump of

Posted: 5th, January 2016 | In: News, Strange But True | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Teen brandished machete gift at mother during Christmas board game despute

other parents How was your Christmas?  Did you and the family play games? One 15-year-old did. During play he threatened his mother with a machete he received as a Christmas present.

To West Jordan, Utah, then, where Sgt. Keith Bronson of the

Posted: 5th, January 2016 | In: News, Strange But True | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Charlie Hebdo cover for the anniversary of the Paris massacre

This is the Charlie Hebdo’s cover for the anniversary of the Paris massacre: “The assassin is still out there.”

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Posted: 5th, January 2016 | In: News | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Police blotter: you CAN buy cocaine on the Isle of Skye

The polic are such wags:

 

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Posted: 4th, January 2016 | In: News | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Keeping Up With The Danczuks: toenails, orgies, escorts and God

DAnczuk sex

 

Keeping up with the Danczuks: a look at Labour MP and anti-paedo activist Simon Danczuk and assorted women in the tabloids.

Daily Mirror (Page 7) : “Shamed MP to sue over ex’s claim he is sex predator”.

Mrs Danczuk

Posted: 4th, January 2016 | In: News, Politicians, Tabloids | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


The Jihadi John show jumps the shark with a little sidekick and new star

tumblr_o0eelafo9f1u5f06vo1_1280 Meet the “New Jihadi John”. You might call him the new improved Jihadi John, given that the latest televised ex-pat murderer is using a gun, having upgraded from a knife, to off enemies

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Posted: 4th, January 2016 | In: News, Tabloids | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


NHS complaint letter of the year

When Yael Biran fell and broke her elbow, the mother of two sought treatment at her nearest NHS hospital in Lewisham, London. Her experience led to a bought to

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Posted: 3rd, January 2016 | In: News | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Simon Danczuk: woman of the year 2016

Simon Danczuk, the sleazy Labour MP for Rochdale, is wrapped around the news like a randy middle-aged man at a bridal shower. The smart move would be for mired Simon to undergo a sex change and emerge as Margaret, or

Posted: 3rd, January 2016 | In: Broadsheets, Key Posts, News, Politicians, Tabloids | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Biased BBC presents murderous attack in Tel Aviv as anti-gay hate crime

hate crime tel aviv The BBC has been reporting on the murderous attack at the Simta Bar on Dizengoff Street Tel Aviv, Israel. Two men are dead. Four more are badly injured.

Kevin Connolly, BBC News, Jerusalem, reports :

There has been speculation that

Posted: 2nd, January 2016 | In: News | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Dear Abby: Agony aunt Letter of the day

Dear Abby…

 

agony aunt

 

 
The letter has many forms:

 

Dear Abby
Date of Joke: Thursday, 27th December, 2012

Dear Abby,

I’ve never written to you before, but I really need your advice on what could be a crucial

Posted: 2nd, January 2016 | In: News | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Jeremy Corbyn gives flooded York a hand – literally

How did the tabloids report on Labour Party leader Jeremy Corbyn’s trip to flood-hit York?

Daily Mirror (Page 19) : “Flood chaos: ‘Tory cuts are a massive threat to life.'”

Odd that such a big story should be buried on

Posted: 1st, January 2016 | In: News, Politicians, Tabloids | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Paedo Hunter Simon Danczuk suspended from Labour Party over teenage sex tweets

sophena houlihan

 

Labour MP Simon Danczuk, 49, has been suspended from the Labour Party amid news that he sent ‘spanking’ texts to a teenager.

Simon Danczuk, MP for Rochdale, told the 17-year-old student she was “cheeky” and that he wanted to

Posted: 31st, December 2015 | In: News, Politicians | Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0