We don’t just report off-beat news, breaking news and digest the best and worst of the news media analysis and commentary. We give an original take on what happened and why. We add lols, satire, news photos and original content.
LONDON Slaves: A look at the big story in the media. Aravindan Balakrishnan and his wife Chanda have been arrested. Josephine Herivel, Rosie Davies and Aishah Wahab working with the police.
ON November 10, 2013, Louis Eccles had news of the Rogarains, that marauding tribe of ne’er-do-wells heading from Bulgaria and Romania to enslave your kids and nick your granny’s mattress:
“In January, the only thing left will be the goat’: Romanian father-of-seven’s boast as mayor says half the population of his villages are on their way to Britain for the higher salaries and generous benefits”
Why the other half are staying, we weren’t not told but it’s most likely because they fancy the goat, whom they most likely worship with black magick.
Remus Neda, 37, is heading for the UK to take advantage of state handouts
He makes most of his money by begging on the streets of Paris
JUST eaten? Just about to eat? Thinking about eating ever again? You might not want to watch this lovely video of an exploding animal corpse.
Yesiree, we have a delightful reel of the special moment when a whale carcass explodes all over a marine biologist as he cuts it wide open.
This particular sperm whale was one of two that died after becoming trapped in a narrow channel in the Faroe Islands… and now it is trapped on the internet.
LONDON Slaves: A daily look at the story of three women “rescued” from a life in thrall to a “weedy” Maosit. Now read on…
Only one newspaper leads with the story on its front page. The Belfast Telegraph:
WE’VE seen them a million times – infuriatingly dull photographs of the weather. Sunrises, rainbows, a bit of rain, some clouds… they’re all stars of boring snaps. However, there’s one weather system that rules the tedious roost – snow.
Snow, of course, can be wonderful, but for the most part, it makes for lousy images because of its uniform nature.
I THINK we all recall that Julian Assange is holed up at the Ecuadorean embassy in London, yes? Well, there’s excellent news about his case, he’ll soon be able to leave that and go off to Sweden to defend his name and his honour against the disgusting and scurrilous rape charges there.
THE Daily Mail is going Down Under:
Britain’s Daily Mail Group has announced it will launch an Australian version of its site with the goal of becoming this country’s leading news website. Daily Mail Australia will launch early next year and hire 50 local journalists, with an editor to be appointed in the next few weeks.
You might not like the Mail, but it makes money and employing local reporters is a sound move. They’re not the first UK organ to head to Oz. The Guardian has opened their version.
MailOnline publisher Martin Clarke said Australia was “an obvious market”.
“We are going very nakedly for a scale play,” he said … He dismissed comparisons with British rival Guardian Australia, which launched here six months ago. “I’m not hugely familiar with what they do in Australia,” he said. “We won’t be copying their model.”
HEY, kids, worrying news. Herbert Jones, better known as Santa Claus, has been arraigned in a Massachusetts court on an indecent assault and battery charge. Free on $1000 bail, Jones is next due in court on Christmas Eve. Should things go badly for Santa, presents this year will be available on his release. And then he might not be allowed to travel out of State.
IT’S obvious that the God of Situational Irony hates America’s Transportation Security Administration almost as much as I do: in late October, only a few days before a TSAgent was gunned down at Los Angeles airport (then died a couple minutes later, after typically heroic cops from the LAPD refused to let medical personnel treat him), an engineer and anti-TSA blogger named Jonathan Corbett received some improperly redacted TSA documents proving that the TSA knows the truth of what its critics have said all along: the agency’s molesty groping policies and porny body-scan photos are completely useless where airline security is concerned, and TSA knows that airplane cockpit doors (strengthened in response to 9/11, since the hijackers were able to force their way in) mean any future hijacking attempts would likely fail anyway.
PETA’S Dumb Animal of the Month is Chilli from TLC. She wants you to say ‘No!’ to the circus. Clowns must not be tolerated! Seals will have to pack up their horns and go freelance busking in the shopping precinct. Elephants will have to seek work as bicycle couriers. The animals must go!
WWII Europe British Isles Rations Clothing:
This is a list of men’s and women’s wearing apparel subject to rationing under Great BritainÂ’ clothes rationing program shown in London on Jan. 29, 1942. The numbers at the right indicate the number of coupons required when the corresponding article is purchased. For example, 16 coupons are needed to buy a man’s raincoat or overcoat.
THINK of some sexy people. The Swedes – they’re notoriously comfortable with their bodies, if soft pornography taught us anything. The Germans too. Seen how small their Speedos get? Or maybe some South American country is the sexiest? They’re all passionate and live in a perpetual state of shouting and arousal.
Well, thanks to a sex survey, we now know that the most adventurous when it comes to sex, the British have it. Presumably thanks to years of suppressing our feeling and dire weather, we’ve realised that every day can be a carnival in the sack.
DO you want to speak in higher education? Universities UK, an organisation seeking to create “an autonomous university sector in the United Kingdom that, through excellence in teaching, research, and knowledge exploitation, raises aspirations, has an international reputation for innovation, and contributes to the wider economy and society. Our mission is to be the definitive voice for universities in the UK. We provide high quality leadership and support to our members, to promote a successful and diverse higher education sector.”
Universities UK has produced a guide for “external speakers in higher education institutions“.
Free speech is fundamental to the role of universities. As a matter of law, universities in England and Wales have a statutory duty to secure freedom of speech, reﬂecting their mission as places where new ideas can be advanced and where open and free debate can and must take place. However…
HOW much do your balls mean to you? Or indeed, do you sleep with a ball-having partner and have grown rather fond of them? Well, thank the stars you’re not seeing the car lover who is selling one of his testicles for £22,000 so he can buy a Nissan 370.
That’s right. A Nissan.
THERE’S been a certain amount of giggling about those three slaves that were liberated in London. It turns out that they were not in fact slaves, not anything like it, they were however the remnants of one of London’s more insane Maoist communes. The leader of that commune being on Comrade Bala who was, if the stories are correct, the inspiration for Wolfie Smith in the TV comedy, Citizen Smith. This has all been going on a long time.
LONDON Slaves: A look at the slaves story in the news. No-one has been convicted, let alone tried for any crimes. But, still, the news media is feasting off the story of three women found living in a Brixton flat.
The Mirror leads with news of a death:
Ben Rossington yells:
Death fall at ‘slave’ house: Police probe woman’s plunge from window of cult suspects’ home
Slave house is now in inverted commas. Former Maoist activists Aravindan Balakrishnan and his wife Chanda have been arrested and released on police bail.
She plunged from the second floor of a terraced house being rented by Maoist cult leaders Aravindan Balakrishnan and his wife Chanda
London Slaves: Statement To Comrade Bala By The Central Committee of the Communist Party of England (Marxist-Leninist) – August 1st, 1974
I’M sure you were as shocked as I was at that story of three women being held as slaves in London for 30 years. But the story is now moving from tragedy into proper giggle worthy territory. The suspected slave master has now been named as Aravindan Balakrishnan. Who was also known as Comrade Bala.
Yup, this is about a small Maoist commune that managed to stagger along from the 70s all the way to today. And not only did social services know all about it they were even providing them with the housing they were using.
LONDON Slaves: A look at the three women found living as “slaves” in London. The married couple suspected of holding three women as slaves for more than 30 years are former Maoist activists Aravindan Balakrishnan and his wife Chanda, reports the BBC.
According to Marxist archives they were leading figures at the Mao Zedong Memorial Centre based in Acre Lane, Brixton, south London, in the 1970s.
I’VE long been a bit mystified by Bitcoin. You know this electronic currency that the geeks have been playing with for the past couple of years? As a little experiment yes, I can see it, but as a replacement for other currencies I tend to think that it won’t happen. But still, if people want to play with it, speculate on it, why the hell not?
Just in the last couple of days there’s been a surge in the price. And everyone’s been a bit puzzled by it but now there’s an explanation that does at least make sense. It may or may not be true, but it does actually make sense. That explanation is here:
THERE’S a fairly basic economic concept which states that if you increase the supply of something then the price of that thing is going to go down. Other things being equal, of course. There are exceptions but they’re exceedingly rare (wheat noodles in North China and rice in South China being the only two proven examples of Giffen Goods known).
So, when we decide to move from 10-15% of the age group going to university to 50% of it doing so what do we think is going to happen to the price of graduates? Quite:
Almost half of all recent university leavers are now working in non-graduate jobs, as those with media studies degrees fare the worst, a new report shows.